Title: Some Wishes
Author: Moonbeam
Rated: PG13
Disclaimer: They all belong to Joss. Grr....Argh, and all that stuff.
Timeline: Buffy-S5. Shortly after Joyce's death.
Pairings: X/A. W/T. B/A with some B/S undertones.
--------------------------------------
Chapter One:
"Buffy? Buffy? BUFFY?!" Dawn yelled, slightly annoyed.
"Huh? What? Me?"
"No. The other Buffy." Sarcasm. Funny. "Sheesh, wake up."
"Anyway." Giles said, looking at me, "Back to our original discussion."
There was a silence and I realized they were both waiting for me to talk. Oh fab. The *one* time I don't exactly pay total attention to Giles. Well..maybe not the only time..but.
I looked at Giles apologetically, "Rewind this tape, please?"
"Last night's patrol." He explained with a smile, "How did it go?"
"Oh! Killed two vamps. Nothing major."
I wasn't sure if my eyes were playing tricks on me, but I could have sworn I saw a flicker of disappointment in Giles' eyes. But I knew the feeling. I'm not exactly saying 'extremely violent situation', but ever since Mom..well, I'd needed something. Something to really thrust myself into, head on. I don't know. Just to get my mind off of things.
"Ah. Well, that's good." He nodded, mostly to himself, "Good."
He smiled and went back to the shelves, unpacking new merchandise and setting it up. Maybe I'd give him a hand later.
"So..how's the homework going?"
"Fine." Dawn replied, barely looking up
"Need any help? Well, as long as it's not math, or history-"
"It's okay." She said, cutting me off, "I'm good."
I knew that tone. I practically *invented* that tone. I could take a hint.
"Okay." I smiled slightly, "Just asking."
The bells on the Magic Box jingled as Xander and Willow walked in. Willow was holding a box of doughnuts.
"Hey." I said, giving a tiny wave as they said hello.
"After school snack." Willow said, setting the box down in front of Dawn.
Dawn smiled brightly, the first one I'd seen in a while, and reached in. "Mm..jelly!"
"You want one, Buffy?" Willow asked, holding the box out to me.
"Eh. No thanks. Not very hungry."
"Okay, so that does mean that if I eat them all you won't pummel me, right?" Xander asked, stuffing his third doughnut into his mouth.
"Uh. Yeah." I couldn't help but grin as he smeared chocolate all over his face, "Whatever."
"So, what's going on tonight? Scary monsters, crazy vamps?" Xander looked at me, awaiting my response.
"Actually, it's even worse." They all, even Dawn, turned to me, slightly worried. "I have to make dinner."
Giles smiled warmly, "If you need any help.."
"No." I said, putting a hand up, "I can do it. I'm going to make us a nice, good dinner."
Dawn snorted from her seat.
"What?!" I exclaimed, "I can cook! I can!"
"Sure you can." She said with a slight smile, "I have every bit of confidence in you. Really."
--------------------------------------
"Extra cheese and pepperoni. Thanks." Dawn hung up the phone, turning around to face me.
"They'll be here in twenty minutes." She said, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Great." I looked down at the burnt pan sitting on the stove and wrinkled my nose. "I think I killed it."
"Well," I could hear the laughter in her voice as she began, "it was a bad, bad pan."
"Funny." I put the pan in the sink and turned the water on, wincing as clouds of smoke began to rise.
"Maybe we should just throw this one away." Dawn said, coughing from where she stood behind me.
"You might be right." I muttered.
From the next room over, I heard a beeping sound. The dryer.
"Clean clothes. Joy." I said, walking towards the door.
"I'll get them." Dawn said, stepping in front of me, "You stay. Extinguish the..fried frying pan or whatever."
"You're too sweet." I remarked, half-sarcastically, half-appreciatively. At least she was making an attempt to help me.
I tried scrubbing the pan for a few minutes, but eventually gave up. Who cares? I could scrounge up enough cash for some new pots and pans.
I finally realized Dawn hadn't returned with the clothes yet, and I hadn't heard anything from the laundry room.
"Dawn? Everything okay in there?"
Silence. I raced to the doorway, panic clutching at my heart. I was so jumpy these days. But what I saw next succeeded in alarming me, anyway.
"Dawnie." I said softly, sitting down next to her on the floor. There she sat, surrounded by the dry, clean clothes, clutching something to her chest, crying into it. A nightgown. A pink one. Mommy's nightgown. It must have gotten thrown in, accidentally. My heart rammed against my rib cage.
"It..It.." She looked up at me, her eyes red and pained, "It's clean now." She said in a tiny voice. "We washed her out of it." She inhaled deeply, her face buried in it and her voice shook. "It doesn't even smell like her anymore."
"Oh Dawn..Dawn..shhh." She fell against me, and I rocked her back and forth on the cold floor as she shook with sobs. I understood. She knew I did. And as I felt her hot tears on my skin, I didn't know what to do. I felt so utterly helpless it terrified me. I needed to take care of her, to be like a mother. But how..how, was I supposed to do all that when I still needed my Mommy to take care of me?
So I just held her tighter. And I cried too.
Author: Moonbeam
Rated: PG13
Disclaimer: They all belong to Joss. Grr....Argh, and all that stuff.
Timeline: Buffy-S5. Shortly after Joyce's death.
Pairings: X/A. W/T. B/A with some B/S undertones.
--------------------------------------
Chapter One:
"Buffy? Buffy? BUFFY?!" Dawn yelled, slightly annoyed.
"Huh? What? Me?"
"No. The other Buffy." Sarcasm. Funny. "Sheesh, wake up."
"Anyway." Giles said, looking at me, "Back to our original discussion."
There was a silence and I realized they were both waiting for me to talk. Oh fab. The *one* time I don't exactly pay total attention to Giles. Well..maybe not the only time..but.
I looked at Giles apologetically, "Rewind this tape, please?"
"Last night's patrol." He explained with a smile, "How did it go?"
"Oh! Killed two vamps. Nothing major."
I wasn't sure if my eyes were playing tricks on me, but I could have sworn I saw a flicker of disappointment in Giles' eyes. But I knew the feeling. I'm not exactly saying 'extremely violent situation', but ever since Mom..well, I'd needed something. Something to really thrust myself into, head on. I don't know. Just to get my mind off of things.
"Ah. Well, that's good." He nodded, mostly to himself, "Good."
He smiled and went back to the shelves, unpacking new merchandise and setting it up. Maybe I'd give him a hand later.
"So..how's the homework going?"
"Fine." Dawn replied, barely looking up
"Need any help? Well, as long as it's not math, or history-"
"It's okay." She said, cutting me off, "I'm good."
I knew that tone. I practically *invented* that tone. I could take a hint.
"Okay." I smiled slightly, "Just asking."
The bells on the Magic Box jingled as Xander and Willow walked in. Willow was holding a box of doughnuts.
"Hey." I said, giving a tiny wave as they said hello.
"After school snack." Willow said, setting the box down in front of Dawn.
Dawn smiled brightly, the first one I'd seen in a while, and reached in. "Mm..jelly!"
"You want one, Buffy?" Willow asked, holding the box out to me.
"Eh. No thanks. Not very hungry."
"Okay, so that does mean that if I eat them all you won't pummel me, right?" Xander asked, stuffing his third doughnut into his mouth.
"Uh. Yeah." I couldn't help but grin as he smeared chocolate all over his face, "Whatever."
"So, what's going on tonight? Scary monsters, crazy vamps?" Xander looked at me, awaiting my response.
"Actually, it's even worse." They all, even Dawn, turned to me, slightly worried. "I have to make dinner."
Giles smiled warmly, "If you need any help.."
"No." I said, putting a hand up, "I can do it. I'm going to make us a nice, good dinner."
Dawn snorted from her seat.
"What?!" I exclaimed, "I can cook! I can!"
"Sure you can." She said with a slight smile, "I have every bit of confidence in you. Really."
--------------------------------------
"Extra cheese and pepperoni. Thanks." Dawn hung up the phone, turning around to face me.
"They'll be here in twenty minutes." She said, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Great." I looked down at the burnt pan sitting on the stove and wrinkled my nose. "I think I killed it."
"Well," I could hear the laughter in her voice as she began, "it was a bad, bad pan."
"Funny." I put the pan in the sink and turned the water on, wincing as clouds of smoke began to rise.
"Maybe we should just throw this one away." Dawn said, coughing from where she stood behind me.
"You might be right." I muttered.
From the next room over, I heard a beeping sound. The dryer.
"Clean clothes. Joy." I said, walking towards the door.
"I'll get them." Dawn said, stepping in front of me, "You stay. Extinguish the..fried frying pan or whatever."
"You're too sweet." I remarked, half-sarcastically, half-appreciatively. At least she was making an attempt to help me.
I tried scrubbing the pan for a few minutes, but eventually gave up. Who cares? I could scrounge up enough cash for some new pots and pans.
I finally realized Dawn hadn't returned with the clothes yet, and I hadn't heard anything from the laundry room.
"Dawn? Everything okay in there?"
Silence. I raced to the doorway, panic clutching at my heart. I was so jumpy these days. But what I saw next succeeded in alarming me, anyway.
"Dawnie." I said softly, sitting down next to her on the floor. There she sat, surrounded by the dry, clean clothes, clutching something to her chest, crying into it. A nightgown. A pink one. Mommy's nightgown. It must have gotten thrown in, accidentally. My heart rammed against my rib cage.
"It..It.." She looked up at me, her eyes red and pained, "It's clean now." She said in a tiny voice. "We washed her out of it." She inhaled deeply, her face buried in it and her voice shook. "It doesn't even smell like her anymore."
"Oh Dawn..Dawn..shhh." She fell against me, and I rocked her back and forth on the cold floor as she shook with sobs. I understood. She knew I did. And as I felt her hot tears on my skin, I didn't know what to do. I felt so utterly helpless it terrified me. I needed to take care of her, to be like a mother. But how..how, was I supposed to do all that when I still needed my Mommy to take care of me?
So I just held her tighter. And I cried too.
