Title: Some Wishes

Author: babyxeyes (*Note: I recently changed my pen name from 'moonbeam' to 'babyxeyes,' just out of a need for some change. So all previous chapters were written by me, only they were under the Moonbeam name. Just in case there was any confusion.)

Rated: PG13

Disclaimer: They all belong to Joss. Grr....Argh, and all that stuff.

Timeline: Buffy-S5. Shortly after Joyce's death.

Pairings: X/A. W/T. B/A with some B/S undertones.

Feedback: Thank you. :D Muah.

Author's Note: In response to the review from Queen Boadicea - I don't plan on making my e-mail address available, for plenty of reason I'm not even going to start getting into. (Let's just put it under a 'bad past experience' category) So I hope you don't mind if I address your comments here. I'm definitely going to finish this story. Probably sometime throughout the next couple of chapters. And I can absolutely promise you it will be anti B/S. Okay? :D

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Chapter Six:

Once I had finished the book, things got a little better.

Every time something got me stressed, I made myself think of the book that was now safely secured underneath my mattress, just waiting for me. Providing me with a smidgen of hope. Just enough to get me through each problem. No more, no less.

Thinking back on it, I might have been a tiny bit addicted. It was a little like a drug for me. I needed my daily dosage. Without it, I couldn't even remember how I had survived before.

I know you're probably wondering how emotions and feelings like this can come from one book. And I know you're probably thinking that now, I'll explain. I'll tell you everything about the book. Tell you what it said, and what it promised, and what it meant to me.

But I'm not going to tell you anything. I'm going to show you.

Just wait.

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+Los Angeles+

"Angel, would you mind explaining to me why you're doing this?" Cordelia's voice rang out softly, from the doorway of Angel's bedroom. Though his back was turned to her, she knew that she hadn't startled him in any way. He had sensed her coming.

Hello? Vampire abilities!

Angel sighed loudly, hastily folding another black sweater into his bag.

"Don't have time, Cordy. Pass me that jacket?"

Cordelia rolled her eyes and angrily threw the jacket to him.

"Excuse me? Do we not work together anymore? If you're about to trek halfway across California to go to Sunnydale, leaving the rest of us behind with a business to run and not even the slightest idea what's happening, the *least* you can do is explain."

"They'll need my help, Cordelia. I can't waste any more time."

"Waste?! Isn't this what we do?! I get the visions, we work them out, and the three of you swoop in just in time. Why is this any different?!"

He glared at her, frustrated and losing patience.

"Because this time, it's Buffy." He said, gritting his teeth and pushing past her to start down the stairs. She ran after him, cutting him off on the staircase and stopping so she was right in front of him.

"Listen, Angel! I know you two have this big passionate history, but why does that give you the right to take everything we stand for and blow it out the window? We're a team! You can't do this without us. You don't even know what the vision meant."

"Yes I do." Angel spat out, continuing past her angry form and making his way down the rest of the steps.

"And you didn't tell us?" She latched her hand around his wrist to stop his quick strides towards the door. He shut his eyes briefly, trying to control his anger. When he opened them again, she was looking at him with nothing but disbelief written in her eyes.

"You knew. You knew what the vision meant..you knew everything, and you didn't even bother telling *me!* I'M only reason you had any CLUE all this was happening anyway!" The volume of her voice was getting louder, and Wesley and Gunn came out of the back room to see what was happening.

He stared at her for a second. "You know where I'll be." He turned for the front door of the Hyperion, as Wesley's voice rang out behind him.

"You can't let your love for Buffy control your life, Angel. You'll go mad if it does."

The only response was the sound of the door slamming behind Angel as he left.

"At least she'll still be alive." He muttered to himself, getting into his car and pulling away into the night.

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+Sunnydale+

I had the night of the ceremony set for the thirteenth.

I had never really been very superstitious. I mean, when you face death on a nightly basis, you don't really let things like 'bad luck' get to you. So thirteen was okay for me.

That whole day, I had been particularly jumpy. I was a little nervous. I didn't even know what to expect. It was the first time I had 'dabbled' in something like this without my friends one step behind me. If something went wrong, no one would even *know.* I was completely on my own.

But, you know, no pressure.

I had told Willow that I had been feeling a little burnt out, and kind of needed just a quiet night for myself. I lied to my best friend, and she bought it. If that lipstick I stole freshman year wasn't sending me to hell, then this was definitely my ticket. But Will took Dawn, no questions asked, just like a good friend is supposed to do. Dawn, Tara & Willow were all going out for dinner, and then spending the night at Willow's dorm. Giles was home, and I didn't even want to think about Xander and Anya, for fear of discovering that not-so happy visual place they sometimes take me to.

But basically, I had the place-and the night-to myself.

The book was sitting on the living room table, opened to the right page. In front of me were the bottle of vanilla and the small sack of blue feathers. Honestly, I was *going* to pay Giles back for those. At this point, I knew the instructions by heart, so I set into action before I could chicken out.

Opening the bottle of vanilla, I read the first line on the page, and dipped my finger in the bottle, smearing some of the extract on each of my wrists. As I continued to read, I watched as the sack of feathers opened all on its own. The smallest feather in the bag floated out, stopping midair. I brought my hand out until it was just under it, and I finished the chant, letting the feather drop into the palm of my hand.

My voice was shaking, but I pressed on. I was almost finished, anyway. A hazy cloud was falling over my eyes, and I brought the feather to my lips, kissing it gently. All I could smell, taste, feel.was vanilla.

"Bring me to her." I whispered.

And then I felt myself fall away.

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Giles was reading.

The night was peaceful, and there wasn't as much as a twinkle of sound from the outside. It was odd, after living on Sunnydale for five years, to have nights like these. Although they were rare and few, they still surprised him when they occurred.

He was just closing his book, getting ready to go to bed himself, when he heard a quick knock at the door.

For a minute, he was completely puzzled. He knew Willow and Tara were planning some sort of 'night of fun' for Dawn because Buffy was wiped out. And while Willow didn't think twice about it, Giles did. He was worried about his Slayer. The empty eyes, the stifled yawns, the fake smiles. He was more than just worried about his fighter..he was worried about the woman inside of her.

Something was bothering her.

But regardless of all this, he knew that she was at home tonight. Maybe it was Xander, asking for something? He silently hoped Anya wasn't with him. As much as he enjoyed her company, she could be a little hard to take at some hours. This time of night, being one of them.

He cleared his throat, standing up and walking to the door. Pulling it open, his eyes widened as they fell over the last person..or non person he had expected to see on the other side.

"Hey Giles." Angel said politely, barely concealing the urgency in his voice. "Mind if I come in?"

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TBC..