Author's Notes: Stupid Neo's singing. Anyway, here's some more of the Fellowship as they struggle with Caradhras. :]
***
It took a few days, but at last they arrived at the base of Caradhras. Switch didn't look too thrilled about the idea, but she had refused to say anything about what the books said to the others which particularly annoyed Neo and Cypher. Trinity didn't really want to know. She was hoping when this was all over, she could go home and read them for herself. Which made her feel a bit dorky, but oh well.
Setting up the mountain was a difficult task. Gandalf led the way with everyone following him. Trinity noticed with amusement that they were lined up according to height...well, except for Neo and Cypher who were at the back, so maybe they were lined up according to IQ.
Trinity sighed as Neo fell over, his necklace slipping off and practically falling off the cliff. There was a odd moment when Cypher picked it up and didn't seem like he planned to give it back to Neo at all.
He held it muttering about how useful it was before Switch threatened to smack him upside the head if he didn't give it to Neo.
Trinity glared at him as they started up the mountain.
***
As they continued their slow ascent, Legolas began to perch on top of the snow banks as they struggled through them. He seemed the most cheerful of the group, whistling to himself and smiling.
"Show off," Cypher muttered unhappily.
"Maybe he's like a Christmas Elf," Neo suggested.
"A Christmas Elf?"
"Yeah, Christmas...ummm...basically this fat guy has all these elves that make toys for little children and--"
"Not to interrupt this highly informative lecture, but what exactly does that have to do with Legolas being able to walk on top of the snow?" Gimli asked.
"...Umm..."
"I see."
"You know, why is it that Middle Earth is so racist. Humans can't do anything. I mean, the freakin' Elf can dance on the snow and see things from a hundred miles away, he gets to live in all the nice places....it's really unfair."
"Oh yes, Cypher, it's extremely unfair for fictional races to be better than white human males."
"Come on, Switch, it is unfair!"
"Your foolish race will reign supreme in the end, so you shouldn't complain," Legolas added sadly.
Switch glared at Cypher. "Yeah, you big dumb jerk!"
"Hey!"
"He's right. Even on Middle Earth there's no escaping stupid Men."
Legolas nodded empathetically.
"But Legolas is basically just some white guy with pointy ears."
"But it is because of those pointy ears, his keen vision, his lean body, his manners and superior personal hygiene that Legolas is not just a white Man but an Elf."
Legolas grinned before slipping on an ice patch and almost falling off the mountainside before Switch grabbed him.
"What about his superior lack of balance?" Gimli asked with a smirk.
"Hey!"
"What he lacks in balance, he makes up for in charm."
Legolas smiled smugly as he went back to walking on the snow banks.
***
Trinity was surprised that there was less annoying Neo moments as they made their way up Caradhras but she was beginning to assume from the blue pallor of his lips that mostly it was because he was freezing to death.
"Hey, Neo."
"So…cold…can't…feel…legs."
The hobbits weren't doing too well either. The Dwarf hadn't said anything but that was probably because his lips were frozen solid. Gandalf seemed grim as they beat off the snow and tried to force their way up.
Cypher seemed to be doing better than most though Switch had to stop him from trying to throw Legolas off the mountain. The Elf really needed to start pretending that the snow bothered him.
"We can't go on like this," Trinity pointed out, patting Neo's shoulder and trying to thaw out the hobbits.
"We have to," Switch said with a grim sort of determination, but even Gandalf was beginning to realize that battle is hopeless.
"What's causing all this freaking snow? Maybe it's the magician Pokemon."
"Sarumon, Cypher. His name is Sarumon."
"Who cares what the hell his name is?"
"It is not Sarumon, who is a wizard not a magician," Gandalf said sternly. "And that is far more important than remembering his name. All the same, Cypher is wise to point out that the situation is most unique. It would seem that Caradhras himself is refusing us passage."
"The what is doing what?"
"Oh shut up, Cypher!" Switch said, and everyone was surprised by how angry she sounded. "Shut up, already! We have to find another way to go, is what this means!"
"There's other ways? Then what the hell are we--"
"All right, you two, stop," Trinity said in exasperation. "We'll yell, fight, whatever at the base of the mountain okay? Right now, let's just go. Cypher, you take the Dwarf. Switch, you take the hobbits and I'll try to get Neo."
Gandalf nodded to her gratefully as he began to clear a path for them to use.
Trinity frowned though. Both Gandalf and Switch knew something though neither one seemed particularly willing to share what was wrong. Maybe it could wait, or at least she hoped it could.
She went to go dig Neo out of the snow.
***
tbc
