All four of us watched the father and child for some time, before Daddy Yeti looked up and spoke again. Anyanka listened hard, nodded several times, talked herself, and nodded while he talked. Then he stumbled to his hairy feet, bowed his head to all of us and turned and limped back up the trail to the top of the mountain.

We looked at each other and started back to camp. I said, "Anyanka, want to share what Hairy Boy said with the rest of the class."

She nodded and said, "He thanked us all. He also said the yetis won't hurt us or block our way to Shambala. I told him who and what we all were while you were retrieving his child, and why we were here. He trusts us enough now to allow us through the tunnels."

"Which is so of the good, "said Buffy.

Giles, having got his breath back on the downhill trail, said, "What's the catch? You don't look happy."

She replied, "There was a major landslide a month ago. The route we were going to use is gone. To get to the main trail we'll have to take the short cut the yetis use."

"What's the bad?" Buffy asked, "Short cuts are of the good, right? Less walkiness."

"It's over the ice-fall to the main ridge. Ice-falls are notoriously dangerous. I've flattened many mountaineers in them over the years. Girlfriends scorned for giant ice-cubes tend to go for the 'flattened like Wyle E. Coyote' thing," Anyanka said.

Giles sighed, and asked, "Anyone here done any ice-climbing? I know I haven't, and I know we didn't cover this in your training, Buffy. Anya? Spike?"

I shook my head, "No mountaineering vamps, mate. More an urban species us."

Anya shook her head, "That's what teleporting is for, avoiding excessive exercise."

We got to camp. Giles rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Looks like we've all got a crash course in rope-work this afternoon then."

"Oh, ropes! Ropes are a totally different matter. I'm an expert with ropes," I rumbled, looking at Buffy.

She swatted my hand and squealed, "Spikesicle! Deep frozen Spikesicle!"

"Sorry, pet, had to take a bit of a dip in the river. Got a tad messy. And I ain't saying the water was cold, but there was an orchestra of brass monkeys singing soprano down there."

"But you're not usually that cold. I mean you're never exactly Mr Furnace, but now you're all freeze-y," she said, looking worried. I hated seeing her worried, but it made me feel warm that she was worried about me.

The head Sherpa bloke must have heard and came over. He picked up my hand and started prodding it, and, "Ow!" That must have cheered him up, but when he started looking for a pulse I pulled my hand back. He yelled to Giles, and he and Anyanka came over to me and Buffy. Sherpa Boy grabbed my hand again, and I took it back, without hurting him, which was pretty hard as the bloke was strong.

I got a full scale Sherpa glare and a slow, loud enough to get through to the idiot Westerner, "Must check hands for frostbite. This, too cold, much too cold. Have to check circulation."

I sent a panicked glance to the other three. Not exactly the time or place to tell the lads about vampires. I mean, frostbite wasn't exactly a nice idea, but I'd never heard of a vamp with it. Then again I'd never seen any other vamps dumb enough to be slogging up bleeding huge mountains. Giles rescued me. He rubbed the bridge of his nose, and said, "Spike here has a medical condition that means he feels cold, but it's not frostbite, It's why he has his medicine in the cooler, but we'll check him over anyway. Our responsibility, not yours. We'll look after him. Um, could you get some tea going? I think we all need some. Thanks."

It worked, Sherpa Boy wasn't happy, but Giles had given him some clear orders, taken responsibility for any limb loss of mine, and he was the boss, so, sorted.

We moved over to the sunny warm side of the campsite where the camp-stools had been moved ahead of dinner. Anyanka ordered me to, "Sit, and take your boots and socks off." I looked at her, and saw no alternative but to obey. Giles and Buffy looked at her, and Buffy's eyes narrowed at the remove items of clothing instruction.

Anyanka looked back at them and said, "What? I've inflicted lots of frostbite in my time. There were always lots of requests for it in mountainous areas. I've never heard of a vampire with it, but I'll know it if I see it, and it's always fingers and toes first, so boots off faster, Mister." I moved faster and got them off. She ordered me to "Wriggle those toes." I wriggled. This was definitely one of those occasions when not being able to blush was a big plus.

Anyanka scratched her nails on my toes and fingers, and I went, "Ow!" Buffy gave her the death glare, which felt so nice it almost offset the death glare I was getting from Giles, and the sheer wish I had at that point for the mountain to open up and swallow me.

Anya smiled and said, "It hurt, so you have feeling, if no circulation, so no frostbite. We can all have tea now, and you can put your socks and boots back on."

Buffy visibly choked back a response to that. I did as I was told, stood up, and said, "Thanks, Dr Anyanka."

She grinned. "Not exactly, but I know painful diseases and medical conditions when I see or inflict them. And for anything else I purchased and read the 'Where there is no Doctor' book from the second-hand bookshop in Kathmandu, and an exhaustive medical kit. I have a mortal to love and look after, and no maintenance manual, and I'm not losing him." Giles blushed. She continued to him, "And I'm worried about your cough. You might have pulmonary oedema. I'm not losing you. I have to listen to your chest now."

Giles said, "Stop fussing! I coughed twice on the way back to camp. It was a long hard ascent. I don't have altitude sickness. No headache, no more breathlessness than to be expected since we're so high up".

Buffy said, "Which is totally of the good. But we still don't know why Spike's so cold." And with a very becoming blush said quietly, "He's never usually that cold."

Giles looked caught between not wanting to think about how she knew what my normal body temperature was and wanting to avoid talking how I'd got cold, but with the usual Watcher fortitude sucked it up and started talking. "I'm assuming it's because he took a dip in the river and the fleece, hat, jacket and gloves, when he deigns to wear them, can only keep in heat that's already been absorbed."

Buffy wrinkled her nose, "But why does Spike get to be the only one that gets a bath? I've never been so long without a shower in my life. God, I so must be stinky Buffy, and I thought I'd left that behind at the DMP. And my hair - tell me the truth; it's dead cat, isn't it?"

It had a certain feline quality but I'm not totally dumb. "Looks great, pet. And everyone's in the same boat about the shower thing, luv."

"Except you, Mr Clean and very curly," she replied, mussing my hair.

I checked the mop. Bugger, the water must have got rid of the last of the hair gloop - the bloody curls were back. "Well, needed it badly, Buffy."

She asked, "Why?"

I looked at Giles. He looked at me. I swallowed hard and said, "Had to. Really did. Sorry, got some bad news for you."

She looked at me. I looked at her, drinking up her face before she knew and started hating me again. Anyanka rolled her eyes at both of us.

Giles stepped in, thankfully. "Buffy, we found the baby with the soldiers. They were all dead, and Riley was one of them."

I jumped in. "He had the baby, and the paperwork in his pocket."

Giles glared at me. Buffy sat down hard on the stool. He told her about the plans the soldier boys had planned for the yeti. She went in on herself.

"I don't believe it. He was the one with the baby yeti? And the orders saying those horrible things they had planned for it? He did know?" Giles nodded.

"But he was always so good. Mr Churchgoing guy. Apple Pie, white-picket fence and Mom guy. All the things I'm supposed to want, except the vamp-ho thing - and that was all my fault. I drove him to it. It must be my fault. He loved me and I ruined him, like I ruin everything. He was all good and stuff before he met me and the cracks in my soul and horrible self- involvement," she sniffed.

I put a very tentative hand on her shoulder and said, "No, his choices, pet, not yours. Not your fault at all, his. Never yours, luv."

She smiled through the sniffing and put her hand on mine. Then she asked the killer question. "What happened to them all?"

Anyanka jumped in. "Spike made a wish to blow up the helicopter so they couldn't get away." Buffy pushed my hand away. Anyanka continued, "Then the yeti made a wish to punish the men that had killed his mate and taken his baby."

She froze up and looked at both of us demons with Slayer in her eyes. "So, Spike didn't kill Riley?"

Anyanka said, "No. He destroyed the helicopter and its soldiers. The yeti took vengeance on Riley and the men that killed his mate and took his baby."

Buffy narrowed her eyes at her, "Through you. So you killed Riley?"

I snapped, "Riley's own actions killed Riley, Buffy. Not Anyanka, not me! You know what they had planned. We're in a bloody war here; there's casualties! And he was about as far from innocent in this as anyone could be."

She snapped back, "You're biased. You hated him."

I admitted it, "Yeah. I'm also right." The acid in her eyes tore through me.

Giles started, "Buffy, it wasn't anything anyone wanted. Heaven knows I didn't."

"You're just defending your demon!" Buffy shouted.

"I don't need anyone defending me, though it's a very pleasant change. I was just doing my job, and what had to be done, like I always do," Anyanka said firmly.

Giles stood straighter. "I'm not 'defending my demon'. That's what you've always done, not me, and I have the scars to prove it." Then he visibly calmed. "But this isn't about you or me, or Anya, Spike or anyone else. This is about Riley, and his choices here, not in Sunnydale, but here. I know you loved the boy, and he did some good things that are worth honouring, which we did. Grief and anger are natural and you're allowed both."

"Oh, thank you, Giles. I'm allowed, am I? Coz that makes it all better, in a way that, no, it doesn't," she snapped before sniffing, "It really doesn't. It's my fault. You said I loved him. I tried. I couldn't. I hate what he was doing with the baby yeti, but if I hate that I have to hate him, and I can't. I drove him back to the Initiative because I couldn't love him the way he deserved. It's all my fault. I don't want to hate him, Giles."

I said, "Didn't deserve you, pet."

"Neither do you!" She said. That burnt. Truth always burns like the finest battery acid.

"I know." I said softy.

Anyanka looked closely at Buffy and said, "That's the scorned woman talking. He scorned you; you hated it. You blame yourself for everything, and you hate him for that. I can feel it. You still do good hate despite being fixed. I thought we fixed you?"

Buffy's jaw dropped. "I am fixed! I can feel everything again, and right now, so wishing I didn't. I hate what you both did. I hate that I hate that. I shouldn't. I'm the Slayer, you're both demons and I kill killer demons, but, war, good demons, bad humans.... God! Why can't it all be: black hat, demon - kill; white hat, human - good, So so much easier!"

"Cos life isn't a crappy John Wayne western, pet. Is more of a Clint Eastwood, I reckon," I ventured.

"So not wanting to talk to you right now," she ripped me a new one.

Anyanka said professionally, "You are sending out a lot of pain and hate."

Buffy turned to her. "Not wanting to talk to you either." Then muttered, "Not wanting to talk to any of you." She turned to Giles. "You knew."

He shook his head. "No, I didn't. And I'm not exactly happy either. But I understand. I understand all of you, and Riley, and I wish I didn't." Anyanka's head moved. He continued, "No, Anyanka, that's not a request, it's a statement."

Buffy said quietly, "I don't want to hate, Giles. I don't want to hate Riley, or Anya, or Spike or anyone, but I hate all of this."

Giles put his hand on her shoulder. "Buffy, you can hate the actions, you don't have to hate the person. In fact it's far, far better for you if you don't. Believe me, I know."

She looked up at him. "How?"

With a rueful smile, "Samuel, the Guardian. You remember your own epiphany?" She nodded. "I had my own, different of course, but still painful, and still worth it." He looked at her, and Anyanka, and even me, though for a lot shorter time, and asked her, "Do you want to know what part of mine was?" She looked up and after a moment nodded.

He swallowed hard. "I've done things I'm not proud of, because I was stupid, and young, and should have known better. I've done things I'm not proud of because I had to, because there was no choice. Those weren't easy things to live with, they really weren't. But Samuel took me though those memories and showed me that I can hate what I did, but I don't have to hate myself for doing it. Hate the actions not the person, it's the only way in the end to be at peace. Can you do that?"

She whispered, "I'll try."

Giles smiled at her. "It made me able to forgive myself, and I had to so I could be happy. So I know I can forgive others, if they hate what they had to do for the right reasons." He looked hard at Anyanka then me. "It might take a while, but I can do it. I know you can. You have a good heart, Buffy, that's why it hurts."

She smiled up at him. "Thank you, Giles. It's really hard. I can't help blaming all of you, though mostly Spike and Anya, but I will try. I hate to think of Riley left down there though."

I said, "That's why I got all bath-needing, pet. We didn't leave 'em down there. He got a Viking funeral. Did the right thing, we did. Put him with his mates, big pyre, Giles saying the words, me moving 'em there, and all."

She looked at both of us, swallowed, and said, "Thank you. It can't have been easy. It means a lot." She chewed her lower lip. "But this has been all stressy and my head's full. Can I go kill something or do anything kick- y or physical?"

I looked at her. She said, "Not that, so not that after all that. Something climb-y, maybe?" I hadn't intended her to take it that way, but give a dog a bad name and all that.

Giles gave her his rueful grin. "Good job we're climbing an ice-fall tomorrow then. I'll get the Sherpas to give us all rope, crampons, and ice- climbing lessons. Should do the trick wonderfully."

She nodded, and we spent the afternoon learning. The metal spikes strapped to the boots were fun, after getting the hang of walking in them. Buffy made a few protests about odd footwear and the problems of walking in them, though she loved the weapon possibilities of razor sharp steel on her feet. Giles, however, pointed out that compared to some of the shoes she'd worn to patrol in over the years crampons were quite normal, and she really shouldn't have a problem driving them.

Giles also sent some of the Sherpas off to fix rope up the ice-fall in the afternoon and next morning. They also dismantled one of their tents, intending to sleep in it as they fixed the ropes all the way to the top, before leaving it set up for us. This left the other Sherpa's sleeping in the cook-tent before getting our tents once we'd moved off.

I pointed out, slightly, the interesting possibilities of a climbing harness and the ropes, and got a hard punch in the arm from Buffy and a major glare from Teaching Sherpa for the joke. I didn't bother with the ice- axe joke.

I got Ice-Buffy over dinner, as did everyone else. Giles asked her how she was and she just replied. "Thinking. Trying. Blaming, and trying not to. Remembering. Kinda sort of wanting to be left alone right now."

I got the ice all night too, but considered it a major concession that I didn't get thrown out of the tent to spend the night with the Sherpa lads in the cook-tent.

I heard the sounds of a Lethe's Bramble spell on the Sherpas, to stop them from leaving, investigating the area, or remembering it afterwards, coming from Giles and Anyanka's tent. There was also a lot of discussion on the morality of expedience verses free-will, before they fell silent. I voted for expedience, so did Anyanka and Giles. Giles just angsted about it before and after.

We set off straight after breakfast and horribly early in the morning, but since all of us were complete beginners on ice-climbing that was well necessary. Buffy and me got to carry all the weapons, but we all had heavy packs, despite having sent a lot of the camping gear with the lads the afternoon before.

The trek up to the snowfield was fine, except for the silence from my walking companion, also known as my silent and still miffed beloved. Then we had to wait for the slower Giles and Anyanka so we could all rope ourselves together in case of avalanche or crevasse. I'd laughed off the scariness of the latter when we'd had our lesson on them. I mean, creature of the dark and general scariness myself. But inching across a flimsy aluminium ladder across a sharp endless gash in the ice I stopped mocking.

It was a hard job. Getting to the end of the ropes tying all four of us together and then having to wait for the slower pair made it harder. The hard climbing up the fixed-ropes and the difficulty of walking in crampons meant all of us really felt it. Giles' cough kept reappearing. Anyanka kept worrying about it. Even Buffy was puffing hard in the thin air. I kept expecting to either fall down a hole in the ice and end up a deep frozen vamp, or get crunched by one of the very scary and very unstable blocks of ice we kept walking under.

We passed the boys coming down and slapped them in the back to say thanks, which gave all of us a much needed breather, even me. Then we slogged on up more of the creaking and groaning ice-fall. It was beautiful. Blues and whites of all shades made up the ice, and the crunch and bite of the ice sounded wonderful. The view, when not obscured by very unstable oddly shaped huge pillars of ice, was bloody amazing. I felt I could see forever, or at least several mountain ranges anyway.

Just as even my legs started to get tired we got to the tent. Bloody marvellous sight it was too. The boys had it all set up on a small flat bit off from the top of the ice-fall. I looked inside. There were 4 sleeping bags and mats all laid out nice, with a small camping stove with dehydrated food in a pot, filled water bottles next to it and just about enough space at the back of the tent for our gear.

I looked back along the trail and saw that Anyanka and Giles had made it up towards the last of the ice-pillars just as it made the kind of groan I'd last heard from a victim of Angelus's singing. Giles coughed and Anyanka worried him about it. He snapped at her between coughs. Then they disappeared from sight, as the ropes angled beneath and around the world's scariest ice-cube. The continued shadow on Buffy's face made the idea of using it in the world's largest glass of Scotch bloody appealing.

A deafening 'crack' snapped me back into awareness just in time to see the massive chunk of ice crash down onto the trail, creating a huge cloud of snow obscuring even supernatural eyesight. Buffy screamed out, "Giles!"

I felt the snow vibrate and I shouted, "Avalanche!"

Buffy and I both turned round sharpish, slammed our ice-axes into the snow as hard as super-strength could make it, and held onto the rope connecting us to the others. Fortunately we didn't have to test the exhaustive Sherpa instructions on the 'use of ropes to save lives for beginners' from earlier. The snow where we were and lower down stayed where it was. I was glad we didn't had to test the lecture. Most other uses of ropes I'm an expert at - climbing, not so much.

Giles and Anyanka both shot up the last of the trail and Giles reached us first, breathing hard and covered in snow. Buffy dashed up to him, crampon- walking awkwardness all forgotten in her haste, and threw her arms around him, sniffing, "Giles, Giles, I nearly lost you. Don't you dare leave me! I'm sorry, don't leave me. Please don't leave me, I need you, Giles, please."

Giles hugged her back, "Not going to happen, Buffy. See, in one piece, if a bit snow covered." He grinned at that to her, until a harder hug made him squeak, "Ribs, Buffy, ribs."

She lessened the death-grip a bit and looked up at him. "Sorry, breathe- yness good, bad Buffy. But you scared me. I thought I'd lost you, and I don't want to, and I don't want our last talk ever to be me being all 'blaming you Buffy'. I love you, Giles. I'm sorry for what I said earlier, I know it's not your fault. It's Spike and Anya's."

Bugger.

Giles hugged her back, said, "I love you too, Buffy, you know that. And Anya and Spike did what they thought was right, and most of me agrees with them, even if I hate it, and also understands why you're upset. But we can all debate this again later. Right now I'm thirsty, and hungry, and Anya and I both just escaped death, so if we could put this aside for now it would help."

A very small, "Ok," could be heard from the Watcher/Slayer huddle.

I took off my shades, looked over to Giles and said, "Narrow escape that, mate. Glad you both made it."

He replied looking across to Anyanka with a look of pure relief on his face, "Me too, Spike, me too."

Anyanka reached us, dropped her pac so she could fit into the gap between Giles and Buffy, and he gathered her into his arms and his love.

Buffy let go after giving him one last squeeze, causing a whimper from Giles, leaving the un-flattened love-birds to reassure each other they were still alive. It took so long that both Buffy and me had ourselves un-roped from each other and our back-pacs off and leaning next to the tents by the time they'd un-coupled. Then they joined us by the tent, un-roped themselves, and Giles got his gear off.

I asked, "And we're going to fit four people into a two-man tent how?"

"It's a two-stroke-three person tent, pillock, and besides, Anya and Buffy are both so slim they probably count as half a person to a tent company," Giles said, having clearly been mentally doing the logistics for some time.

"And a very nice warm half a person, she is too," I said, resting my weary head against Buffy's down clad shoulder; very comfy it was too.

She swatted me away. "You're still in the bad books." So I backed off.

"It's going to be a bloody tight fit in there," I said, peering into the tent.

"Nevertheless, we all need to fit in here. I've been thinking it all out on the way up. It would be inappropriate for me to sleep next to Buffy, though we've all left 'inappropriate' several countries and thousands of miles away."

"And it would be way weird to snuggle up to my Watcher!" Buffy said.

"There will be no snuggling of my man by anyone except me," Anyanka ordered.

Giles, torn between glaring and melting, continued, "And no way is Anya sleeping next to Spike."

"Not even thought about the idea, mate." I said, wanting to get in and out of the tent in one piece. Buffy smiled, before remembering she was meant to be annoyed with me.

"Which, despite meaning the two shortest get the most headroom, would leave the best, and in fact, the only solution as Spike next to the tent wall and Buffy. Anya next to her in the middle, and me also getting a face full of tent," Giles finished.

"I like that solution, but you'll mostly be getting a face full of me," Anyanka smiled at him.

"How come I have to be in the middle?" Buffy asked.

"Because there is no way on earth I'm sleeping huddled up to Spike; he snores," Giles stated firmly.

I defended myself. "I bloody well do not! I only breathe to talk!"

"Which you do incessantly!" Giles said.

"Do not! Buffy, tell him!" She rolled her eyes at me. I'm pretty sure that they'll stick that way some day.

"Do too!" Giles snapped.

"Children!" Anyanka shouted. "Now you've both established your masculine unwillingness to sleep together, and so reaffirmed your heterosexuality, can we all get to the snuggling? Buffy and I, as women, and as such sensible, are not threatened by the idea of sleeping together in a non- lesbian fashion, so get into your sleeping bags. It's cold. My legs hurt from all that climbing, and I'm still worried about Rupie's cough. I need snuggles!"

I crawled inside and Buffy passed me all the bags, which I stowed at the back. Buffy, Giles and I then got into our sleeping bags one at a time. Wearing several layers of clothing while doing it made that a bit tricky. Once all four of us were inside the cramped conditions made movement of any sort difficult.

Anyanka didn't get into her bag. She sat on top of it and unpacked the cups from her bag. She asked for my Zippo. I took it out of my pocket and threw it to her. She lit the stove, threw it back to me and cooked up some soup, before handing it to each of us. Right welcome it was too. Warmed me up nicely, and got me ready for the blood in my own pack, which was freezing and foul, but well needed. We all finished, Anyanka put the stove to the back of the tent and got into her bag.

I was utterly knackered. It was maybe seven in the evening - morning time for my kind, but I felt as shattered as the others sounded. We all tried to crash.

It didn't work too well.

Buffy's rigid back to me hurt me like hell. The moonlight and starshine that slipped through the tent meant I could see it fine. It felt worse. I also heard her heart working harder than normal to function as high as we were, which worried me a bit. The Watcher's heart was thumping away like a Led Zep bass-line. Anyanka started every time his breathing got irregular, which it was doing regularly. Plus we were packed in tighter than a tin of sardines. So, all in all, not exactly a recipe for a good nights kip, though we did all try.

Giles coughed so hard his head came up like a sit up. Anyanka sat bolt upright, and pulled her arms up from out of her bag so she could twist around to hold him. She tapped him on the back until he stopped and said, "I'm fine. It's just the altitude."

Anyanka turned to me, "Yes, you sound 'fine'. Spike, you have vampire hearing. Is there any fluid on his lungs, please, listen for me."

I replied, "Anything you want, pet."

"I'm not having Spike on my chest listening to me breathe!" Giles spluttered.

I said, "Don't have to. Can hear from here. Is fine. No nasty gurgling. I'll tell you both if and when I hear it."

Anyanka sighed with relief. "Thank you, Spike." Then she turned and said, "Rupie, don't die on me, please. I couldn't take that. I nearly lost you once today. I can't do it again!"

Giles stroked her cheek, being all the skin that could be seen under her hat and fleece, and said softly, "I nearly lost you too, I think. Could that ice or an avalanche have killed you?"

Buffy stirred with what seemed professional interest at that.

Anyanka replied, "Possibly. That weight was enough to crush the amulet, and then me, but if it was sheltered by my body, I don't know. I know it would have hurt, even if it didn't break the amulet, but not as much as losing you."

He sighed and drew her closer, "Oh, Anya, what am I going to do with you? I can't live without you either. Well, I probably could, but I wouldn't want to, even if I shouldn't have you."

She said, "Well, you do have me, and I'm not leaving you, so get used to it, Mister!"

"I'm trying to, I really am," he sighed. Then she snuggled into his chest and we all tried to sleep again.

An hour or so of contented snuggling from Watcher and demon later Buffy whimpered, "My face hurts. It's all hot and stuff, and that's not right since it's all ice-boxy in here."

Giles switched his torch on and looked at her. "Buffy, you've got sunburn on your nose and cheeks. Didn't you use the sunscreen?"

"California girl here, didn't think I'd need it so much," she said softly with embarrassment. "Ok, clearly one of Buffy's more dumb ideas, but the Slayer healing should kick in soon, right? Coz now, it's all ouchy, and hot and stuff."

I had an idea. I took my gloves off and asked, "Anyone need some more water?"

Anyanka said, "The book said humans need to drink as much water as possible at this altitude, though I'm not sure about me or you, but I am thirsty."

"Ok, two missions for the price of one. Sorted. I'll get the snow. You put the stove on." She nodded. I got up out of my sleeping bag and picked up the pot. I put my boots on and unzipped the tent long enough to get out before zipping it back up for the others. In the moonlight gleaming off the snow I crunched over to the looser snow. I used my bare hands to pick up heaps of it and compressed it down into the pot. I did it until I'd pushed as much snow into the pot as I could. I kept my hands on the top until the heat I'd picked up leached into the snow melting it a little, allowing me to get some more in, and also taking my hands down to cold-compress temperature. Then I went back inside the tent and handed the pot to Anya. She put it on the stove to boil so it was safe to drink.

I took my boots off and lay on my side on top of my sleeping bag. I supported my head with one cold hand and laid the other gently across Buffy's burning face.

She sighed and looked up at me. "Why do you make it so hard for me to hate you? Right now, I want to be able to hate you. It would be so much easier if I could hate you." She wrinkled her nose up, in that adorable way she has. But simultaneously she relaxed as the cold of my iced hand relieved the heat in her skin. She rubbed her cheek into my hand like a cat and continued, "But I can't."