HULLO!! Sorry guys, I am sooooooooo sorry this took so long. I wrote the first seven chapters during winter break and haven't had time since. now that its spring break *YAY!* i think i can update a few chapters during this time. Another reason i didn't update sooner is the small amount of reviews i got with the last chapter...it wasn't very encouraging. So if u want me to continue, REVIEW DAMNIT!!!
..well..here ya go! Enjoy!
"Well...I'm waiting."
Tak stood, arms folded, trying to figure the sly look and Zim's face.
Zim chuckled slightly too himself, which slowly grew to mild laughter, then into loud gawfing and eventualy insane maniacal screams. "You'd like to know wouldn't you? Despite its legendary apeal, I find the accention of little use to me and you a far greater threat then the letting lose of the secrets, Tak. Perhaps it is because the process has relativly just started"
Zim slowly paced around Tak as if pondering his secrets, the benefits of including Tak in his little discovery and the cons that would eventualy occur throughout the Irken race if it ever got out. In all reality he was just wondering if Gir was making tacos for dinner.
"Alright, Tak! I'll share with you my recent epiphany. First off, answer me this : What is the one thing the Tallest protect and gaurd above all else?"
Tak scratched her head slightly. "Er...wouldn't that have to be their snacks?"
"YES!!! That is the KEY to ACCENTION!!!"
"What? Poorly packed sweetners held together by glucose in shiny wrapping??"
"YES!! I mean, no! What is significant about candies? The sweetening! THE SWEEEEEEEEETENING!!!!!"
"Zim...you're making no sense at all."
"THE SWEETENING!!! Think Tak! What is different about the royal snacks?!"
"uh..theres always the drugs...no? uh...umm...oh yeah! The royal spread! C3h49!"
"YES! And where does C3h48 come from Tak?"
"What was it...what was it....Arse Minor right? Thats the planet Red and Purple were assigned to during skirmish skwaskwiglaspleen. But what does that have to do with....wait...C3h48? Thats the key?"
"SUCCESS!!"
"Wait, how do you know this? You haven't even had a sample of C3h48. No irken has! Wait...does this mean Arse Minor is Spliff?!?"
"No. Thats what I first suspected. But as you can see, I too am growing. According to my calculations, I will reach full accention within five years of time."
Tak slammed her fist down in frustration. "But how is that possible? How do you know this? There is C3h48 on Earth too?"
"No...not an ounce. Tak...you do know what happened after Red and Purple's recon misson? What happened to the Tallest?"
"They...accended?"
"No, besides that!"
"Uh...oh yeah, they lost use of their limbs! Thats why they're stuck in those suits. But I thought that was just a strain of freak virus that rendered them limbless."
The more the two Irkens conversed, the more Tak suspected Zim was actualy on to something. The vey thought scared her.
"No, my gullible Tak, thats what the Irken media has told you. Everyone is so foolishly worshiping the Tallest, bowing so damn low none have even suspected the royal spread. No one has bothered to try to synthesize it. No one but me.
Tak glared at Zim. "So thats it...you're synthesizing royal spread...thats how you're accending....I never would have thought someone as blindly loyal to the tallest as you would disobey their strongest command...that you would.."
"NO!" Zim banged his head in frustration. "No Tak, I'm not synthesizing it. I dont HAVE to."
"But you said there was no..."
"The limbs Tak. Remember the LIMBS!!" Zim flailed his arms wildly as a demonstration.
"Uh..."
"When I first started going through the changes, and when I realized what it was that was making me change, I DID synthesize C3h48. You CAN'T make the actual substance Tak, the tallest secretly ensured all synthesizers were not able to. But I could still test the data and experiment on theoretical responses it would have on Irk DNA. Unlike the common C34 that most Irkens use as sweeteners, C3h48 is far more complicated. An its effects far more..peculiar. Turns out it deteriorats nerve endings in select spinal muscles...i.e. the limbs. Thats because C3h48 is an imperfect strain in the path to accention. Its close...but not close enough to fill in all th holes.
"HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS?? What started YOUR accention Zim! I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE DAMNIT!!" Tak grabbed Zim and shook him furiosly.
"Taaak! Calm!! All in dude time. You MUST know the whole story. My accention started shortly after I defeated you. I ran out of standard invader snack packs, and it seemed the Tallest had cut off my shipment. Oh, don't even say it. I know I'm not really an invader, you don't have to rub it in. Well, having no sweet sweet snacks, I had to resort to lowly EARTH snacks. And thats where it started. You see Tak, it's not C3h48 thats on Earth its.."
"Sugar."
"YESS! You see, like I said C3h48 is an imperfect strain of the sweetner on Spliff that caused the great accention. No one ever, EVER suspected the sugar, and by the time our technology became advanced enough to figure it through DNA experimentation, the genes were so dormant, it was impossible. But SUGAR! Yes sugar! In our element table it would be C4h49I82CL4 and one other element that is not on ANY other planet in the known universe. Hydrogen. Which is why water is scarce in the Universe as well. Sugar is the PERFECT strain Tak! It has no faults, and locks with our dna so percisely it is impossible it wasn't meant to."
"WAIT! If thats so then this means...Spliff is.."
"Earth"
THERE!! Finally, another chappy fnished. Again I apologize how long this took. Sorry it was relatively short too, but i jus wanted to lay out something to appease the small amount of readers. I'll be updating again soon...hopefully....