There once was a girl from Venus
Of an uninspired genus
She did not care for prose
But if ever need arose
She would make it monotonous
Though asking 'why' in a careless tone
To her, the answer's already known
Seeing no reason to give her trust
She turns her back in sad disgust
With a faint, barely audible moan
-
There once was a girl from Mars
With her eyes all full of stars
She took quite well to prose
Neither vague nor verbose
And she didn't mind her scars
Though asking 'why' in an angry tone
To her, the answer cannot be known
Seeing no reason to place mistrust
She embraces it all with heady lust
And hopes that her example is shown
-
Well, the Martian girl does not know why
The Venusian lets life pass her by
She wants to lend a little help
To this sad, mysterious, lonely whelp
So she points toward the wide. star-filled sky
The sky is the source of the stars in her eyes
Lit brightly with the yearning of countless sighs
Wherever you are, it is near
A sanctuary from reasoned fear
An answer to all those apathetic 'whys'
-
A naïve argument of perfect disagreement,
Is a contrived, callous, cruel, self-imposed treatment
Hardly rousing any realistic thought,
And achieving nothing that should be sought
A well considered ignorance in agreement
Chapter 3: Yet Another Ending
Eventually, I just asked her bluntly. "So, are you gonna explain what you said about suicide, or what?"
Rei wasn't suicidal. She didn't want to kill herself, in other words. She wanted everything to end in fulfillment of a destiny, yes, but she never held a razor to her wrist. She never contemplated hanging herself. She knew what death would mean, and wasn't particularly eager to go through it again.
"For most people, suicide would be an end. For me, there could be no end. I could always be replaced... but I have said all of this from the beginning. To answer your question more directly, there was a part of me that was actually driven to fulfill my purpose."
In other words, there was a part of her that wanted Third Impact, and not just death. And also...
"I could never kill myself, because that is something that only human beings do."
She describes herself as though she's impossible to understand, like she's some kind of soulless monster or something.
"I am not a human being."
But that's bullshit. She has emotions and feelings, just like everyone else. If she'd told me that she was a monster back when I didn't know her so well, I might have believed her. But, just reading through what I've written so far, it's obvious that Rei is at least a little normal. You can compare her to others, and I don't care if she writes in a fucking note this time or not.
The problem is that there was nothing to distract her from these depressing thoughts about death and hopelessness. There was no one to give her a much-needed slap in the face when she was at her lowest points. She had very little human interaction in her life, and would only later come to understand that she didn't want nothingness. She would never, however, get rid of this idea that she wasn't human.
"I am partly a demon. This is a fact. I am not a human being."
But it's her emotions that make her human. I mean, maybe it was true, in the very beginning, that she wasn't human. Maybe it's still true, but it just doesn't matter anymore. I think that she'll eventually learn, just like me, that it's best to just forget the past sometimes. Sure, anything that doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but anything that does kill you won't help at all. She's died a few times, so she's obviously doing something wrong.
Anyway, let's move on to a seemingly unrelated subject.
"I first knew myself to be attractive from the other children. Gendou Ikari never told me, though he knew that I would have listened. He was reluctant to speak about that sort of thing, I believe, because of my resemblance to his wife. In any case, he didn't prepare me for what would happen when my breasts began to grow larger."
I was able to smile, finally. Even Rei could raise light topics of conversation, occasionally. "The boys were interested in you, then?"
"They were interested in my body, yes. It meant nothing to me. One of the few things I deigned to sneer at in my youth was male sexuality."
"So you turned them down, without even thinking about it? Come on." I gave her a knowing look, a false smirk on my face. I think I was getting desperate.
She paused and thought about it. When she spoke, slowly, thoughtfully - there was a sort of bitterness in her voice that I'd never heard.
"I considered it, yes. I considered sacrificing of every existing quality I possessed for something of no worth to me. I considered letting them use me, knowing that the only thing that interested them was underneath my clothes. I considered letting them through my field of security for no other reason except that they had an urge that meant nothing to me. I still considered it... But after that brief consideration there was no desire left. No desire for any human relationship in my life, beyond what already existed. I let them take this desire from me."
Self-disgust is very rare for her. I've never known her to have that look on her face, like she felt dirty, and the bitterness in her voice betrayed that she was hiding something. Something personal. I was tempted to feign ignorance, but the temptation to know the truth was stronger.
"Rei, are you sure that's all there is to it? There's nothing more?"
She stared through me, a hint of anger in her eyes. She knew that I was accusing her of lying. The fact that she was lying didn't help matters. [i]"It is not my intention to speak of anything insignificant, and you are not the one to judge what is important in this matter."[/i] She knows how to argue a non-existent point, I'll give her that.
"Rei, if it isn't important, why did you bring it up? Come on. If I'm interested, everyone else will be too. That's the whole point of this, remember?"
"Very well. I will follow your advice."
"Thank you."
Seeing how hesitant she was to begin, my heartbeat quickened. It was obviously going to be something interesting.
Rei, in the third grade, didn't have to deal with other children any longer. They just left her alone, as they had learned to do. She spent the time in class just staring out the window, and could sit by herself during the breaks without being bothered. As time passed and she grew more and more apathetic, she would come to appreciate this. Back then, she didn't. She still hoped for a friend.
'Then why didn't she ever talk?' the reader might ask. 'Well', I might reply, 'Have you been reading so far, or did you just skim?'
"There was a very quiet transfer student in my class, who also happened to live in the apartment next door. I often saw him standing outside his apartment, staring at the sky. I believe he was a year older than myself. When Shinji arrived, several years later, I was vaguely reminded of this boy."
She immediately sensed that there was something different. There was something that separated him from the other children. Rei knew that she wasn't ever likely to have many friends, but, at that point, she still believed in the possibility of a kindred spirit. She was still seeking some kind of friendship.
This boy, this new transfer student, never seemed to speak. He always seemed to radiate sadness, and had a silent, uncaring nature. In the classroom, he tended to stare out the window, and always answered the teacher's questions in a whisper. He never talked to anyone during the breaks, always staying by himself. He stared at Rei sometimes, something that she interpreted as curiosity. She was curious about him, so it seemed natural that he would be curious about her as well.
She continually watched him, waiting for something that would prove him to be normal like the others. Perhaps he would laugh, or hum, or do something else that would betray some sort of inner contentment. This expected sign didn't came, and she grew ever more hopeful that she might have found something like a 'friend'.
"Gendou was kind to me, but I desired something more. I wanted to believe that there was someone who could understand my words. Someone less mature than the Commander, but more peculiar than any child."
"He was very tall, and many of the students were afraid of him. His silent nature frightened them, and I thought nothing of the rumors I overheard. Some of the children spoke about him amongst themselves, saying that he was violent and crazy. They told stories about him, just like me."
He was strange looking compared to the other students, since he was so tall, she would reason, and he never spoke or displayed even a bit of emotion. He spoke in a whisper, just as she did. They told stories about him, just like they told stories about her. The only thing that seemed at all incongruous was his tendency to stare [i]at[/i] people, and not through them.
In the classroom, she watched him out of the corner of her eye, not wanting him to notice her. If he turned in her direction, she would pretend to be looking at something else. I don't mean to give the impression that she had some sort of shy crush, because it was hardly that. Rei wanted a friend and nothing more, but she had learned to be cautious.
"I was very hesitant to approach another person, to tell someone things about myself. I didn't want him to know that I was watching him. I had learned that people were like predators, searching for weaknesses to exploit. Keeping silent, and keeping things secret... it was a way of avoiding them. It was many days before the desire to speak with him overcame my fear of intolerance."
She was patient for the appropriate moment, waiting until after school when she could be sure there would be no interruptions. When she approached him, it was without pretense. It was the only time she would ever really reach out to a person.
"I just started talking. I told him about myself, my desire to become nothing. I told him that death was an eternal nothingness, and that nothingness was my greatest desire. I told him that my purpose was nothing less than absolute death, as I thought. I told him that no one understood, and could never hope to. I told him that I was very sad. I kept on speaking and speaking, as if I knew that it was my only chance, and that I would never speak that way again."
He listened, this large and quiet boy, as sincere emotion blossomed across her usually blank face. He probably didn't really understand much of what she was saying, but he didn't interrupt her. She kept on speaking, as if reading aloud from an impossibly long monologue, revealing parts of herself she desperately needed to show.
She finished, and saw him smile for the first time. At this point, perhaps his emotion has revealed itself, in reaction to Rei's own expressive outpour? He becomes her one friend, someone she can confide in and so on? No, his smile wasn't a pleasant one.
"I am glad that this happened at such a young age. If we had been teenagers, it might very well have been much worse. As it was, he only grabbed and frightened me, and pressed his lips against me in a disgusting way. I think he clumsily grabbed one of my breasts, but I'm not sure.
"I thought he was like me. I thought that his silent nature was an expression of his emptiness. This boy was the worst of the type bred from sex comics and television. His silent nature hid nothing but his perversity. In a way, he turned out to be stranger than I was, but that was hardly a comfort."
She had come to see the innate difference between herself and other children. A quiet boy like him may have had similar mannerisms, but that was where the similarity ended.
She ran away from him. Rei retreated into her apartment and locked the door with a shaky hand. Leaning against the door, breathing heavily, her face emptied of the emotion she had gone to so much trouble to express. She didn't care anymore, and she wouldn't be so quick to trust a stranger in the future.
"I had made many assumptions, and all of them were wrong. Still, I took this experience the wrong way; I will admit that. It wasn't proof that I had no hope of ever making a friend. It was just proof that I was a young fool.
"It was foolish of me to think that this boy would be similar to me just because he was socially inept. Gendou never taught me one of life's most ill learned lessons. 'Never trust anyone'. Trust and faith are very much overrated."
With that nice sentiment, I'm going to move away from Rei's perspective on this and give my own, just for a moment.
In the aftermath of my first bad experiences as a teenager, it's always been my opinion that too much importance is placed on romantic relationships. Romantic relationships are important from a psychological viewpoint, but people will often obsess over them, and that's self-defeating. Shinji Ikari is a prime example of this. He told me once that he used to fantasize that a woman would 'complete' him as a person. I think his exact phrasing was 'become one'. I used to think something similar when I was younger. I had a crush on an older man, named Ryouji Kaji, and I thought he would change everything for me.
'Becoming one' is an impossible thing. Rei realized long before Shinji and myself that this notion, this idea of 'becoming one', is just a comforting delusion; a selfish hope. Shinji might call it a 'prayer'. That fits it pretty good, I think. Everyone prays that there's someone out there that compliments them like that. Someone that fits them so well that they could become like one person.
Rei stopped saying that prayer a long time ago. I, for one, don't plan on telling her to start saying it again. I might try to get her laid, though. Male sexuality may be the one thing that she 'deigns to sneer at', but if anyone could use a bit of loosening up, it's her. She completely avoided the lonely road of the hopeless romantic, but ended up on the solitary cynic stretch. Just because there isn't a person that fits her completely, just because there isn't a person that can 'become one' with her, she's decided that it's hopeless, and given up.
What sort of attitude is that? How do you justify choosing loneliness over loneliness? I've heard her say 'I am formed by my interactions with others', meaning it with complete sincerity. She values other people; she doesn't 'deign to sneer' at them like she pretends to. I may be taking that out of context, but it still holds true today. It's how she acts.
That experience with the perverted boy, something that she was hesitant to speak of even in the privacy of my apartment, shows why it was necessary for Rei to become so good at lying to herself. She's convinced herself that it's just not worth it to seek human relationships. She's convinced herself, in so many words, that there is no one that compliments her even slightly.
"I am not unhappy, as I used to be, and I don't desire an end to everything. My life is a solitary one, but that is out of necessity. Both romance and sex are meaningless to me, so there is no reason to seek companionship. My friends are few, because there are few who care. To put it plainly, I do not enjoy solitude, but it is the best of my options. The Angel in me wants to remain isolated, because Angels are solitary creatures. The human in me longs to meld and fuse with other humans, becoming one and, in doing so, gaining a complete understanding of one another."
She thinks that assuming there's someone for everyone is hopelessly romantic. That's not true. It's hopelessly romantic to say that there isn't someone for everyone. No one is so special that they have to be alone forever, even though they don't want to. Not even Rei. Yeah, the Angel in her wants to be isolated, while the human in her wants to become one with others, but both sides are wrong, so it doesn't matter. In the end, there's really nothing stopping her.
Human relationships aren't something to be dismissed as impossible, no matter what the circumstances. She's isolated, strange, and different, but that doesn't matter. It's stupid for her to think that she has to be exactly like everyone else to be liked. I've met everyone else, you see, and I don't really like them at all.
This is your biography, and, hopefully, everyone who reads it will be able to understand you better. I'm hoping that, after you've read it, Rei, you'll understand better too.
End Chapter Three
A note from the Author - Rei, please grow up. If you're going to cut stuff out, fine, but don't write stupid, sarcastic limericks just to get back at me. That last stanza was obviously a response to the stuff I wrote at the end. I was just giving my opinion like you said I should.
A note from Rei Ayanami - Those poems are written seriously, and there is no need to take offense. If you look closely, you'll find that I agree with your statements. You do not think that I would accuse you of being naïve?
Pre read by LeperMessiah. Sexed by Rev'd.
All reviews and criticism welcomed.
okuaku@hotmail.com
^ ^/^ ^.^ _ ?s
Of an uninspired genus
She did not care for prose
But if ever need arose
She would make it monotonous
Though asking 'why' in a careless tone
To her, the answer's already known
Seeing no reason to give her trust
She turns her back in sad disgust
With a faint, barely audible moan
-
There once was a girl from Mars
With her eyes all full of stars
She took quite well to prose
Neither vague nor verbose
And she didn't mind her scars
Though asking 'why' in an angry tone
To her, the answer cannot be known
Seeing no reason to place mistrust
She embraces it all with heady lust
And hopes that her example is shown
-
Well, the Martian girl does not know why
The Venusian lets life pass her by
She wants to lend a little help
To this sad, mysterious, lonely whelp
So she points toward the wide. star-filled sky
The sky is the source of the stars in her eyes
Lit brightly with the yearning of countless sighs
Wherever you are, it is near
A sanctuary from reasoned fear
An answer to all those apathetic 'whys'
-
A naïve argument of perfect disagreement,
Is a contrived, callous, cruel, self-imposed treatment
Hardly rousing any realistic thought,
And achieving nothing that should be sought
A well considered ignorance in agreement
Chapter 3: Yet Another Ending
Eventually, I just asked her bluntly. "So, are you gonna explain what you said about suicide, or what?"
Rei wasn't suicidal. She didn't want to kill herself, in other words. She wanted everything to end in fulfillment of a destiny, yes, but she never held a razor to her wrist. She never contemplated hanging herself. She knew what death would mean, and wasn't particularly eager to go through it again.
"For most people, suicide would be an end. For me, there could be no end. I could always be replaced... but I have said all of this from the beginning. To answer your question more directly, there was a part of me that was actually driven to fulfill my purpose."
In other words, there was a part of her that wanted Third Impact, and not just death. And also...
"I could never kill myself, because that is something that only human beings do."
She describes herself as though she's impossible to understand, like she's some kind of soulless monster or something.
"I am not a human being."
But that's bullshit. She has emotions and feelings, just like everyone else. If she'd told me that she was a monster back when I didn't know her so well, I might have believed her. But, just reading through what I've written so far, it's obvious that Rei is at least a little normal. You can compare her to others, and I don't care if she writes in a fucking note this time or not.
The problem is that there was nothing to distract her from these depressing thoughts about death and hopelessness. There was no one to give her a much-needed slap in the face when she was at her lowest points. She had very little human interaction in her life, and would only later come to understand that she didn't want nothingness. She would never, however, get rid of this idea that she wasn't human.
"I am partly a demon. This is a fact. I am not a human being."
But it's her emotions that make her human. I mean, maybe it was true, in the very beginning, that she wasn't human. Maybe it's still true, but it just doesn't matter anymore. I think that she'll eventually learn, just like me, that it's best to just forget the past sometimes. Sure, anything that doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but anything that does kill you won't help at all. She's died a few times, so she's obviously doing something wrong.
Anyway, let's move on to a seemingly unrelated subject.
"I first knew myself to be attractive from the other children. Gendou Ikari never told me, though he knew that I would have listened. He was reluctant to speak about that sort of thing, I believe, because of my resemblance to his wife. In any case, he didn't prepare me for what would happen when my breasts began to grow larger."
I was able to smile, finally. Even Rei could raise light topics of conversation, occasionally. "The boys were interested in you, then?"
"They were interested in my body, yes. It meant nothing to me. One of the few things I deigned to sneer at in my youth was male sexuality."
"So you turned them down, without even thinking about it? Come on." I gave her a knowing look, a false smirk on my face. I think I was getting desperate.
She paused and thought about it. When she spoke, slowly, thoughtfully - there was a sort of bitterness in her voice that I'd never heard.
"I considered it, yes. I considered sacrificing of every existing quality I possessed for something of no worth to me. I considered letting them use me, knowing that the only thing that interested them was underneath my clothes. I considered letting them through my field of security for no other reason except that they had an urge that meant nothing to me. I still considered it... But after that brief consideration there was no desire left. No desire for any human relationship in my life, beyond what already existed. I let them take this desire from me."
Self-disgust is very rare for her. I've never known her to have that look on her face, like she felt dirty, and the bitterness in her voice betrayed that she was hiding something. Something personal. I was tempted to feign ignorance, but the temptation to know the truth was stronger.
"Rei, are you sure that's all there is to it? There's nothing more?"
She stared through me, a hint of anger in her eyes. She knew that I was accusing her of lying. The fact that she was lying didn't help matters. [i]"It is not my intention to speak of anything insignificant, and you are not the one to judge what is important in this matter."[/i] She knows how to argue a non-existent point, I'll give her that.
"Rei, if it isn't important, why did you bring it up? Come on. If I'm interested, everyone else will be too. That's the whole point of this, remember?"
"Very well. I will follow your advice."
"Thank you."
Seeing how hesitant she was to begin, my heartbeat quickened. It was obviously going to be something interesting.
Rei, in the third grade, didn't have to deal with other children any longer. They just left her alone, as they had learned to do. She spent the time in class just staring out the window, and could sit by herself during the breaks without being bothered. As time passed and she grew more and more apathetic, she would come to appreciate this. Back then, she didn't. She still hoped for a friend.
'Then why didn't she ever talk?' the reader might ask. 'Well', I might reply, 'Have you been reading so far, or did you just skim?'
"There was a very quiet transfer student in my class, who also happened to live in the apartment next door. I often saw him standing outside his apartment, staring at the sky. I believe he was a year older than myself. When Shinji arrived, several years later, I was vaguely reminded of this boy."
She immediately sensed that there was something different. There was something that separated him from the other children. Rei knew that she wasn't ever likely to have many friends, but, at that point, she still believed in the possibility of a kindred spirit. She was still seeking some kind of friendship.
This boy, this new transfer student, never seemed to speak. He always seemed to radiate sadness, and had a silent, uncaring nature. In the classroom, he tended to stare out the window, and always answered the teacher's questions in a whisper. He never talked to anyone during the breaks, always staying by himself. He stared at Rei sometimes, something that she interpreted as curiosity. She was curious about him, so it seemed natural that he would be curious about her as well.
She continually watched him, waiting for something that would prove him to be normal like the others. Perhaps he would laugh, or hum, or do something else that would betray some sort of inner contentment. This expected sign didn't came, and she grew ever more hopeful that she might have found something like a 'friend'.
"Gendou was kind to me, but I desired something more. I wanted to believe that there was someone who could understand my words. Someone less mature than the Commander, but more peculiar than any child."
"He was very tall, and many of the students were afraid of him. His silent nature frightened them, and I thought nothing of the rumors I overheard. Some of the children spoke about him amongst themselves, saying that he was violent and crazy. They told stories about him, just like me."
He was strange looking compared to the other students, since he was so tall, she would reason, and he never spoke or displayed even a bit of emotion. He spoke in a whisper, just as she did. They told stories about him, just like they told stories about her. The only thing that seemed at all incongruous was his tendency to stare [i]at[/i] people, and not through them.
In the classroom, she watched him out of the corner of her eye, not wanting him to notice her. If he turned in her direction, she would pretend to be looking at something else. I don't mean to give the impression that she had some sort of shy crush, because it was hardly that. Rei wanted a friend and nothing more, but she had learned to be cautious.
"I was very hesitant to approach another person, to tell someone things about myself. I didn't want him to know that I was watching him. I had learned that people were like predators, searching for weaknesses to exploit. Keeping silent, and keeping things secret... it was a way of avoiding them. It was many days before the desire to speak with him overcame my fear of intolerance."
She was patient for the appropriate moment, waiting until after school when she could be sure there would be no interruptions. When she approached him, it was without pretense. It was the only time she would ever really reach out to a person.
"I just started talking. I told him about myself, my desire to become nothing. I told him that death was an eternal nothingness, and that nothingness was my greatest desire. I told him that my purpose was nothing less than absolute death, as I thought. I told him that no one understood, and could never hope to. I told him that I was very sad. I kept on speaking and speaking, as if I knew that it was my only chance, and that I would never speak that way again."
He listened, this large and quiet boy, as sincere emotion blossomed across her usually blank face. He probably didn't really understand much of what she was saying, but he didn't interrupt her. She kept on speaking, as if reading aloud from an impossibly long monologue, revealing parts of herself she desperately needed to show.
She finished, and saw him smile for the first time. At this point, perhaps his emotion has revealed itself, in reaction to Rei's own expressive outpour? He becomes her one friend, someone she can confide in and so on? No, his smile wasn't a pleasant one.
"I am glad that this happened at such a young age. If we had been teenagers, it might very well have been much worse. As it was, he only grabbed and frightened me, and pressed his lips against me in a disgusting way. I think he clumsily grabbed one of my breasts, but I'm not sure.
"I thought he was like me. I thought that his silent nature was an expression of his emptiness. This boy was the worst of the type bred from sex comics and television. His silent nature hid nothing but his perversity. In a way, he turned out to be stranger than I was, but that was hardly a comfort."
She had come to see the innate difference between herself and other children. A quiet boy like him may have had similar mannerisms, but that was where the similarity ended.
She ran away from him. Rei retreated into her apartment and locked the door with a shaky hand. Leaning against the door, breathing heavily, her face emptied of the emotion she had gone to so much trouble to express. She didn't care anymore, and she wouldn't be so quick to trust a stranger in the future.
"I had made many assumptions, and all of them were wrong. Still, I took this experience the wrong way; I will admit that. It wasn't proof that I had no hope of ever making a friend. It was just proof that I was a young fool.
"It was foolish of me to think that this boy would be similar to me just because he was socially inept. Gendou never taught me one of life's most ill learned lessons. 'Never trust anyone'. Trust and faith are very much overrated."
With that nice sentiment, I'm going to move away from Rei's perspective on this and give my own, just for a moment.
In the aftermath of my first bad experiences as a teenager, it's always been my opinion that too much importance is placed on romantic relationships. Romantic relationships are important from a psychological viewpoint, but people will often obsess over them, and that's self-defeating. Shinji Ikari is a prime example of this. He told me once that he used to fantasize that a woman would 'complete' him as a person. I think his exact phrasing was 'become one'. I used to think something similar when I was younger. I had a crush on an older man, named Ryouji Kaji, and I thought he would change everything for me.
'Becoming one' is an impossible thing. Rei realized long before Shinji and myself that this notion, this idea of 'becoming one', is just a comforting delusion; a selfish hope. Shinji might call it a 'prayer'. That fits it pretty good, I think. Everyone prays that there's someone out there that compliments them like that. Someone that fits them so well that they could become like one person.
Rei stopped saying that prayer a long time ago. I, for one, don't plan on telling her to start saying it again. I might try to get her laid, though. Male sexuality may be the one thing that she 'deigns to sneer at', but if anyone could use a bit of loosening up, it's her. She completely avoided the lonely road of the hopeless romantic, but ended up on the solitary cynic stretch. Just because there isn't a person that fits her completely, just because there isn't a person that can 'become one' with her, she's decided that it's hopeless, and given up.
What sort of attitude is that? How do you justify choosing loneliness over loneliness? I've heard her say 'I am formed by my interactions with others', meaning it with complete sincerity. She values other people; she doesn't 'deign to sneer' at them like she pretends to. I may be taking that out of context, but it still holds true today. It's how she acts.
That experience with the perverted boy, something that she was hesitant to speak of even in the privacy of my apartment, shows why it was necessary for Rei to become so good at lying to herself. She's convinced herself that it's just not worth it to seek human relationships. She's convinced herself, in so many words, that there is no one that compliments her even slightly.
"I am not unhappy, as I used to be, and I don't desire an end to everything. My life is a solitary one, but that is out of necessity. Both romance and sex are meaningless to me, so there is no reason to seek companionship. My friends are few, because there are few who care. To put it plainly, I do not enjoy solitude, but it is the best of my options. The Angel in me wants to remain isolated, because Angels are solitary creatures. The human in me longs to meld and fuse with other humans, becoming one and, in doing so, gaining a complete understanding of one another."
She thinks that assuming there's someone for everyone is hopelessly romantic. That's not true. It's hopelessly romantic to say that there isn't someone for everyone. No one is so special that they have to be alone forever, even though they don't want to. Not even Rei. Yeah, the Angel in her wants to be isolated, while the human in her wants to become one with others, but both sides are wrong, so it doesn't matter. In the end, there's really nothing stopping her.
Human relationships aren't something to be dismissed as impossible, no matter what the circumstances. She's isolated, strange, and different, but that doesn't matter. It's stupid for her to think that she has to be exactly like everyone else to be liked. I've met everyone else, you see, and I don't really like them at all.
This is your biography, and, hopefully, everyone who reads it will be able to understand you better. I'm hoping that, after you've read it, Rei, you'll understand better too.
End Chapter Three
A note from the Author - Rei, please grow up. If you're going to cut stuff out, fine, but don't write stupid, sarcastic limericks just to get back at me. That last stanza was obviously a response to the stuff I wrote at the end. I was just giving my opinion like you said I should.
A note from Rei Ayanami - Those poems are written seriously, and there is no need to take offense. If you look closely, you'll find that I agree with your statements. You do not think that I would accuse you of being naïve?
Pre read by LeperMessiah. Sexed by Rev'd.
All reviews and criticism welcomed.
okuaku@hotmail.com
^ ^/^ ^.^ _ ?s
