Movies on the ceiling
Remus lay on his back, his pupils widening with the pills he was taking. For so long he had dismissed Helena's prescriptions as just rubbish, but now he was having a hard time saying that it was a bad idea. He liked the way his breath quickened, how his mood changed so suddenly and especially how he felt so strong. Strong enough to kill the Dark lord all over again with his bare hands. It was so strange to be able to feel stronger when one was a werewolf. A werewolf always had a little inhuman strength. Somehow, these Muggle pills made him feel like a superhero.
The room was dark; he liked it that way. He could imagine that he was all alone in a Muggle movie theatre and they were playing back his memories on the big screen. Helena was big on Muggle things, and often took him to the loud, dizzying cinema. The ceiling was his silver screen and he watched again as Lily moved gracefully in his arms. He could almost feel her, resting against his chest ever-so-slightly, her warmth, her soft hair…he moaned softly. Why did he do this to himself?
'Remus? Are you all right in there?'
Ellie. Over the past few weeks they had grown close, close enough to tell each other they were werewolves. It made Remus wonder if a Dark Creature attracted other Dark Creatures, or perhaps it was just plain coincidence. Perhaps it was fate. He had been a believer of fate until James and Lily died because no one as wonderful as those two deserved to die.
'Yeah,' his tongue was thick in his mouth. His words slurred together and he thought he sounded drunk. 'Just, you know, staring at the ceiling.'
'Oh yeah.' Ellie paused and Remus thought he could hear her thinking. How can you hear someone thinking? 'Can I join you?'
'Sure.'
The door opened with a slight creak. Everywhere in the house was rather damp and nothing was immune to it, let alone the door hinges. Ellie was wearing silk pyjamas with sheep on them, a reminder that she came from New Zealand. Remus rolled over a bit on his bed so that she could lay down with him.
'Hey there, Ell.'
'Hey there, Remus.' She smiled at him, and he smiled too. There was something about her smile that just made you want to join in and find out what was so wonderful. 'Are you bored?'
He shook his head. 'No.' with another movement, he was on his back and staring at the roof again. 'I'm just looking at my memories.' He took her hand and guided her around them. They were fading fast and he wanted Ellie to see them. 'There is my former best friend. James Potter. And Lily Potter there, see the child. That's Harry.'
She was looking at him with one of her gazes. 'Remus, I believe you are seeing things.'
Remus frowned. 'I'm not...I'm not...'
Ellie kissed his brow gently. 'Of course not, Remus.' She snuggled into his arms, resting her head on his chest. 'Tell me about your time at Hogwarts. I am very interested to know what you got up to with those friends of yours.'
With a smile on his face, Remus told her all about their escapades, excluding the ones that were too personal or too painful and to his dismay there seemed to be more of them than tellable stories. He chose to tell her all about the pranks they had played on Snape. 'It all started when Snape said that he was better at Potions than us. We knew it was true, but James and Sirius would never let him live it down.'
'Oh, wait, first...how did you guys become friends?' Ellie did this quite often. She would interrupt him and ask him a vital piece of information that he had somehow, illogically, left out.
'Sirius and James were friends from the first train ride. They just clicked. They befriended me when Sirius let off a bunch of Fireworks and I helped find them places to hide. We were snooping around the castle when one of the teachers nearly caught us. Peter lied to them, saying we were in our dorms all the time. We let him join in and then we were four and the Marauders, in homage to our sneaking. Lily sort of took Peter's place in our group, but that was because Peter started getting a little fat and he found it hard to run away.' Remus coughed.
'Ah, thanks Remus. Go on with the Snape Wars.'
'Anyway, James and Sirius decided that they were going to make an explosive potion and show Snape they really were better at Potions. They did just that, and Snape was in the Hospital Wing for a day and a half, getting his face glued back on. When he got out, he was fuming. The first thing he did was go and change every single piece of food on the Gryffindor table for something disgusting. I have no idea how he did it, he wasn't particularly good at Transfiguration.
'Things continued like that for a while, but Sirius went overboard when he told Severus where I went to transform at the full moon. James stopped him just in the nick of time. He found out that I am a werewolf and we had to stop playing pranks on him because he would just "let it slip".'
Ellie was thinking again. She was good at that. 'The full moon is coming up soon.'
'That it is.'
'How would you feel if we went hunting together?'
He looked at her in shock. 'Are you serious? In wolf form?'
'Of course.'
'We can't! We'll be shot with silver bullets!'
'No we won't. I work for the Department of Dark Creatures. I have connections. We go out to the moors and we'll hunt some hares and indulge in just being wolves. It will be wonderful, Remus.' Her voice was so soft; she was merely breathing the words.
'I don't think we should....'
'Once, once only...you have to give in to your wolf once in your life...'
He floated just inside of consciousness, tasting the coppery taste of blood in his mouth. What had he done last night? That thought jolted him out of the fuzziness and into full awareness. He was outside and it was cold. Remus shivered and tried to wrap his cloak around him. Some places were torn and it was soaked.
Upon standing, he shook himself like the wolf he had been last night. Remus wondered where he was and what he had done last night. He remembered something about hunting rabbits, snapping their necks and eating them raw and dripping. With a slight shiver, one of pleasure as his mind was half wolf; he looked around for any sign of Ellie.
He found her by a stunted tree, seated up in the branches, looking like she was day dreaming. She saw him and smiled, climbing down so she could hug him. 'Did you have fun last night?'
'I don't know. I can't remember.'
'That's a shame. You were wonderful,' she smiled. She always smiled.
'We didn't get shot?'
'We didn't get shot.'
'And no one will find out?' That was the crux of the matter. He did not want anyone discovering he had let his self-control go. He thought his self-control was one of the better things about him, and for so long he had ignored that part of him. It was evil, he told himself. It is not a part of you. Something in Ellie had made him want to be a wolf, if only for a night, so that he could have the sweet release. Almost like if he had kissed Lily more thoroughly that night she was so distraught.
'No one,' she slipped her arms around him and gave him another hug, resting her head on his chest. 'We are very similar, Remus.'
'I could be very happy with you Ellie.' Without realising it, he was using the exact same words as Lily. In his mind, he continued: "No, Lily is my life, but I could be very happy living with you."
'And I could be very, very happy with you.'
Author's Note: Ok, I apologise for not writing the drugged up Remus very well, but I've never actually been with someone when they were high, so you know, this is just my speculation from the information I found.
Iselin: Everytime I try to just sit down and say "Right, today I am writing the Alexia story" I just can't! I think it may something to do with the fact I was so into the idea of Alexia being evil that I didn't really give her a chance after that, lol, I'm so mean. Thanks for the review!
Darth Flirt: I've been talking about the motivations behind what my characters do with Sir Crig and you just have to remember that Ellie didn't want to do it. She was forced to because of her job, and the reason she was so business like was because she didn't want her feelings to get in the way.
Yay to Sir Crig who helped me think of a cool twist that'll make some people a bit creeped out, I think, I don't know these things. I'm not...wonder woman (Go Bernard). Ah well, thanks again good sir!
