Chapter 16: Side effects
Selina's consciousness was slowly surfacing from the depths of sleep. Her legs were engulfed by a pleasant warmth, it felt like a soft, but heavy blanket was stretched out on them. Her eyelids fluttered open lazily and even her tiniest movement seemed to provoke an incredible response. "Selina! Melamin /my love/, how are you?" she heard Legolas's soft voice. Four preoccupied faces were hovering over her, she could only make out as a blur. She blinked lazily several times and finally the world came into a much clearer focus. Legolas was sitting next to her and tenderly stroke her head, his eyes shining brightly with a mixture of relief and love.
Gimli was looking at her with a smile on his face, happy to see her safe and sound. Aragorn's and Gandalf's expressions were giving away equal emotions. She stirred and locked down at her feet, surprised that she couldn't move them. Sulrathi lay on them sleeping peacefully, purring contently and looking very much like a harmless little kitten.
The wizard raised his eyebrows and looked at Selina, his eyes twinkling friendly. "You had us worried for a while! You have been asleep for quite some time." he said finally. "How long have I been sleeping?" she asked, her voice coming out as a hoarse rasp. "Three days." came the soft answer from Legolas. "Three days! We have lost three day, because of me!?" she asked incredulously. "No, we didn't!" Aragorn answered her calmly. "The horses have been killed by the Wargs, but we continued our hunt on Tulrah nevertheless. Legolas carried you in his arms, while you were sleeping!" She gasped in surprise and looked at the elf with a tint of accusation in her gaze. "Do not worry, melamin! I assure you were as light as a feather!" the elf winked at her and laughed. "It seems that you are well enough to make jokes, than it couldn't have been all that bad." she smiled at him with mischief sparkling in her eyes. The others chuckled at her remark, relieved of the burdening worries of the last days that had hung over their heads like rain clouds.
~
She spent the rest of the day recovering from her long sleep, eating and drinking to regain her strength. Legolas had refused to leave her all day, but finally she had shooed him away to go scouting the area with Aragorn. She was now sitting near the fire, chatting merrily with Sulrathi who was stretched out lazily at her feet.
The Selvadage'tok shaman was finally alone and the wizard finally had the opportunity to engage her in a conversation he had wanted to have with her ever since the battle against the Wargs. Gandalf approached her and sat down next to her, staring silently into the flames for a while before he decided to talk.
"That was quite a little trick you performed there three days ago." he said, pausing for a second, "A power has been unleashed inside of you, I haven't felt there before." He looked at her curiously, challenging her with his eyes for an explanation. "Yes, you could say that I was surprised, too. Especially the side effects came highly....unexpected. I myself have no idea how all of this happened!", she answered truthfully. They seemed to have captured Sulrathi's attention, as the head of the she- panther whipped around at the first words of their conversation. "Maybe, I should explain it to both of you!", she purred out in her velvety voice. "Yes, that would be highly considerate." Gandalf answered.
Selina looked at him in surprise - he was able to speak and understand the language of the animals. The old wizard never ceased to surprise her, whenever she thought she had managed to see through his facade, he pulled a new trick out of his sleeve, after which she had to revise her opinion about him. Well, at least this explained how he had been able to call Shadowfax.
The she-panther lay down in a comfortable position, curdled up in front of the warm campfire and started her tale, her voice coming out as a soft melodious purr. "I'm Selina's totem, that means that I'm here to guide her and protect her when she is in danger. We are united by a bond that goes beyond friendship - we are family. When I evoke this power in her I gave her everything I had to offer - my memories, an ancient knowledge taught by mother nature herself. It's an immense amount of information and it will take some time until you will be able to sort through everything, Selina. But in the meantime you have to trust your instincts, they will guide safely you on your perilous path."
Selina was sitting completely still, the news that she was now equipped with new unknown powers overwhelmed her and washed over her with the force of a tidal wave. She starred into the fire, frozen in position like a statue and a sudden chill seemed to creep through her body, though he was wrapped tightly in a blanket. The memories of the battle against the Wargs terrified her, because she had felt a raw and brutal power raging inside her, almost uncontrollable in its wrath.
"I'm sorry, I think I'll need some time to work through all this. I know you two only have the best intention, but would you please leave me alone for a while?" she asked with a thin and shaky voice. Gandalf stood up and touched her shoulder, understanding shining in his wise eyes. "A lot of people are scared of the potential they discover inside of themselves, but you can rise beyond your fears that hold you back, even beyond your own expectations. I have seen many things in my long live. The weak and small can defeat the most powerful evil, the bravest can fall pray to their own fears and loose themselves in despair and insanity, but in the end it's all up to them! Your own will determines which path you will choose." With that he left together with the she-panther who threw her one last comforting look, before she disappeared with Gandalf in the darkness.
~
She sat there looking at the kindling flames that danced like a ballet in front of her. Somewhere Selina had lost track of time, completely engulfed in her thoughts. She was startled by a soft touch on her shoulder, but knew immediately who it was. He emitted the pleasant smell of comfort, of understanding and love. It was Legolas.
The elf sat down next to her and looked at her for a moment without speaking, his gaze seemed to explore the depths of her soul that his intense blue eyes read like an open book. He draw her closer to him, gathering her in his arms where she felt safe and sheltered from all harm. "What ails you, melamin?" "I....." She took a deep breath before she continued. "I just had a little conversation with Gandalf and Sulrathi. She told me about the powers she awoke in me." Selina drifted of, her forehead in a frown. After a few moments that passed in silence, accompanied only by the soft crackling of the fire, she finally started to speak again. "I'm scared, Legolas! I don't know what is going to happen to me, I feel like I can't control those powers she unleashed in me. They are wild, raw and ancient. They could consume me and I couldn't even prevent it!" "Was the power controlling you, or were you controlling it when you used it in battle?" he asked her matter-of-factly. "I was in control, but I felt this indescribable rage that could have overwhelmed me any minute. I just wanted to destroy those creatures, because they were threatening to kill my friends." she answered and the memories flickered freshly before her mind's eye. "Do you remember the words you said back then? That you were nature's servant and defending it?" he enquired. "Yes, of course I do, but what is it you want to tell me?" Selina asked him with a confused and sad expression on her face. "Well, think about it this way: you are enacting nature's will, defending it against those who attack it. Your task maybe difficult, it will require much effort and you will have to mobilize all your strength to accomplish what you have to do, but nothing of it will happen in the name of evil." Legolas paused to gather his thoughts. "Is the changing of seasons something evil? No, it is simply a means to an end, it is part of the circle of life! We might not be able to understand it, but it is necessary to keep the balance of creation and decay, of life and death. We might not be able to apply the categories of good or evil on nature, because its stands above them. Call it fate, call it the will of the Valar, call it anything you want to, but in the end you will always arrive at the conclusion that everything happens out of a reason. This power has been given to you, because this is the test that life has thought out for you. It is your chance to proof that you are a true warrior, because the fiercest battle is not fought out with the sword, but with your will. It is your chance to proof that your strong and will resist the temptation of evil." "Do you really think that I will be able to do this?" Selina asked hesitantly. "I do not only think so, I know! And I will be there with you to tell you again and again!" he said seriously.
Selina stayed silent for a long time, pondering over his words carefully. Finally she nodded in wordless approval and smiled at him, the tension slowly draining out of her body. "Thank you!" she finally said and kissed him tenderly on the cheek, then a mischievous smile crept over her face "I knew there was a reason why I prefer older men!" He let out a rich, melodious laugh. "I thought you have already lost your heart to the dwarf." He said, alluding to her conversation with Gimli from three days ago. "So, you were listening after all! Well, then you should know that I don't love you because of your good looks!" As soon as the words have left her mouth Selina noticed her 'slip of tongue'. She had just said that she loved him! Obviously the words hadn't escaped Legolas's attention either, as his expression became very serious and his eyes bore into hers with an intensity, she had never felt before. As slowly as the morning sun is rising in the sky a smile, sparkling brilliantly with happiness, spread over his handsome face. "Is this the usual way your people confess their love?" he said and merriment was ringing in his voice. She blushed in embarrassment and averted her gaze.
Legolas moved closer and raised her chin with his hand, looking into the beautiful face of the person that had come to mean the world to him. He could have talked for hours trying to describe his feeling for her in an adequate way, but in his heart he new that it would only be a weak attempt, a waste of breath.
Words can be very powerful and yet sometimes they can be utterly useless. They can be as sharp as the sharpest knife and destroy a person's life. They can start and end wars, decide over life or death. The only think they cannot do is express precisely how we really feel. We build complicate and intriguing works of art with our words, but in the end they are just phantoms that exist to keep up the illusion of a meaning that either isn't there at all or so insignificant that it is barely noticed by anyone. It is best to speak in the simplest words, in order to give them more power, so that they come as close as possible to the essence of what we really want to express with them.
Legolas knew of all that and when he looked at her, remembered what they had lived through together so far, tried to comprehend how much she really meant to him, his mind was flooded with a multitude of words to describe his feelings for her. But all of them were too insignificant to be uttered, so he tenderly took her hand in his and placed a kiss in its palm before he placed it over his heart. "This is yours and it will stay this way for the rest of all times." he said, his eyes never leaving hers. "I wish I could express my feelings better, but whatever I say, will not be able to describe the extend of my love for you. Let my deeds speak for themselves. Let me love you with my every touch, every gaze and every breath. Will you grant me this wish?" She nodded with tears of joy shining in her eyes and finally their lips joined in a soft and tender kiss of true love.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Many of you have suggested that I should turn this into an original fiction. Well, I think that's a good idea, but it might not be as simple as changing the names, because when I wrote this I was really imagining Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli and Gandalf. If I remodelled all of it, it would mean that I would have to create a new set of characters. (Having a dwarf, an elf, a wizard and an human in a party - and also the bit at Rivendell - remind me a bit too much of Tolkien) So if I'm going to do this I'll go all the way!! I'm really thinking about this and maybe there will be an original fiction. But first of all I have to get the whole story out of my system (, because I have it all planned out in a certain way in my head)! So please put up for a little while with me not writing canon! *begs*
Selina's consciousness was slowly surfacing from the depths of sleep. Her legs were engulfed by a pleasant warmth, it felt like a soft, but heavy blanket was stretched out on them. Her eyelids fluttered open lazily and even her tiniest movement seemed to provoke an incredible response. "Selina! Melamin /my love/, how are you?" she heard Legolas's soft voice. Four preoccupied faces were hovering over her, she could only make out as a blur. She blinked lazily several times and finally the world came into a much clearer focus. Legolas was sitting next to her and tenderly stroke her head, his eyes shining brightly with a mixture of relief and love.
Gimli was looking at her with a smile on his face, happy to see her safe and sound. Aragorn's and Gandalf's expressions were giving away equal emotions. She stirred and locked down at her feet, surprised that she couldn't move them. Sulrathi lay on them sleeping peacefully, purring contently and looking very much like a harmless little kitten.
The wizard raised his eyebrows and looked at Selina, his eyes twinkling friendly. "You had us worried for a while! You have been asleep for quite some time." he said finally. "How long have I been sleeping?" she asked, her voice coming out as a hoarse rasp. "Three days." came the soft answer from Legolas. "Three days! We have lost three day, because of me!?" she asked incredulously. "No, we didn't!" Aragorn answered her calmly. "The horses have been killed by the Wargs, but we continued our hunt on Tulrah nevertheless. Legolas carried you in his arms, while you were sleeping!" She gasped in surprise and looked at the elf with a tint of accusation in her gaze. "Do not worry, melamin! I assure you were as light as a feather!" the elf winked at her and laughed. "It seems that you are well enough to make jokes, than it couldn't have been all that bad." she smiled at him with mischief sparkling in her eyes. The others chuckled at her remark, relieved of the burdening worries of the last days that had hung over their heads like rain clouds.
~
She spent the rest of the day recovering from her long sleep, eating and drinking to regain her strength. Legolas had refused to leave her all day, but finally she had shooed him away to go scouting the area with Aragorn. She was now sitting near the fire, chatting merrily with Sulrathi who was stretched out lazily at her feet.
The Selvadage'tok shaman was finally alone and the wizard finally had the opportunity to engage her in a conversation he had wanted to have with her ever since the battle against the Wargs. Gandalf approached her and sat down next to her, staring silently into the flames for a while before he decided to talk.
"That was quite a little trick you performed there three days ago." he said, pausing for a second, "A power has been unleashed inside of you, I haven't felt there before." He looked at her curiously, challenging her with his eyes for an explanation. "Yes, you could say that I was surprised, too. Especially the side effects came highly....unexpected. I myself have no idea how all of this happened!", she answered truthfully. They seemed to have captured Sulrathi's attention, as the head of the she- panther whipped around at the first words of their conversation. "Maybe, I should explain it to both of you!", she purred out in her velvety voice. "Yes, that would be highly considerate." Gandalf answered.
Selina looked at him in surprise - he was able to speak and understand the language of the animals. The old wizard never ceased to surprise her, whenever she thought she had managed to see through his facade, he pulled a new trick out of his sleeve, after which she had to revise her opinion about him. Well, at least this explained how he had been able to call Shadowfax.
The she-panther lay down in a comfortable position, curdled up in front of the warm campfire and started her tale, her voice coming out as a soft melodious purr. "I'm Selina's totem, that means that I'm here to guide her and protect her when she is in danger. We are united by a bond that goes beyond friendship - we are family. When I evoke this power in her I gave her everything I had to offer - my memories, an ancient knowledge taught by mother nature herself. It's an immense amount of information and it will take some time until you will be able to sort through everything, Selina. But in the meantime you have to trust your instincts, they will guide safely you on your perilous path."
Selina was sitting completely still, the news that she was now equipped with new unknown powers overwhelmed her and washed over her with the force of a tidal wave. She starred into the fire, frozen in position like a statue and a sudden chill seemed to creep through her body, though he was wrapped tightly in a blanket. The memories of the battle against the Wargs terrified her, because she had felt a raw and brutal power raging inside her, almost uncontrollable in its wrath.
"I'm sorry, I think I'll need some time to work through all this. I know you two only have the best intention, but would you please leave me alone for a while?" she asked with a thin and shaky voice. Gandalf stood up and touched her shoulder, understanding shining in his wise eyes. "A lot of people are scared of the potential they discover inside of themselves, but you can rise beyond your fears that hold you back, even beyond your own expectations. I have seen many things in my long live. The weak and small can defeat the most powerful evil, the bravest can fall pray to their own fears and loose themselves in despair and insanity, but in the end it's all up to them! Your own will determines which path you will choose." With that he left together with the she-panther who threw her one last comforting look, before she disappeared with Gandalf in the darkness.
~
She sat there looking at the kindling flames that danced like a ballet in front of her. Somewhere Selina had lost track of time, completely engulfed in her thoughts. She was startled by a soft touch on her shoulder, but knew immediately who it was. He emitted the pleasant smell of comfort, of understanding and love. It was Legolas.
The elf sat down next to her and looked at her for a moment without speaking, his gaze seemed to explore the depths of her soul that his intense blue eyes read like an open book. He draw her closer to him, gathering her in his arms where she felt safe and sheltered from all harm. "What ails you, melamin?" "I....." She took a deep breath before she continued. "I just had a little conversation with Gandalf and Sulrathi. She told me about the powers she awoke in me." Selina drifted of, her forehead in a frown. After a few moments that passed in silence, accompanied only by the soft crackling of the fire, she finally started to speak again. "I'm scared, Legolas! I don't know what is going to happen to me, I feel like I can't control those powers she unleashed in me. They are wild, raw and ancient. They could consume me and I couldn't even prevent it!" "Was the power controlling you, or were you controlling it when you used it in battle?" he asked her matter-of-factly. "I was in control, but I felt this indescribable rage that could have overwhelmed me any minute. I just wanted to destroy those creatures, because they were threatening to kill my friends." she answered and the memories flickered freshly before her mind's eye. "Do you remember the words you said back then? That you were nature's servant and defending it?" he enquired. "Yes, of course I do, but what is it you want to tell me?" Selina asked him with a confused and sad expression on her face. "Well, think about it this way: you are enacting nature's will, defending it against those who attack it. Your task maybe difficult, it will require much effort and you will have to mobilize all your strength to accomplish what you have to do, but nothing of it will happen in the name of evil." Legolas paused to gather his thoughts. "Is the changing of seasons something evil? No, it is simply a means to an end, it is part of the circle of life! We might not be able to understand it, but it is necessary to keep the balance of creation and decay, of life and death. We might not be able to apply the categories of good or evil on nature, because its stands above them. Call it fate, call it the will of the Valar, call it anything you want to, but in the end you will always arrive at the conclusion that everything happens out of a reason. This power has been given to you, because this is the test that life has thought out for you. It is your chance to proof that you are a true warrior, because the fiercest battle is not fought out with the sword, but with your will. It is your chance to proof that your strong and will resist the temptation of evil." "Do you really think that I will be able to do this?" Selina asked hesitantly. "I do not only think so, I know! And I will be there with you to tell you again and again!" he said seriously.
Selina stayed silent for a long time, pondering over his words carefully. Finally she nodded in wordless approval and smiled at him, the tension slowly draining out of her body. "Thank you!" she finally said and kissed him tenderly on the cheek, then a mischievous smile crept over her face "I knew there was a reason why I prefer older men!" He let out a rich, melodious laugh. "I thought you have already lost your heart to the dwarf." He said, alluding to her conversation with Gimli from three days ago. "So, you were listening after all! Well, then you should know that I don't love you because of your good looks!" As soon as the words have left her mouth Selina noticed her 'slip of tongue'. She had just said that she loved him! Obviously the words hadn't escaped Legolas's attention either, as his expression became very serious and his eyes bore into hers with an intensity, she had never felt before. As slowly as the morning sun is rising in the sky a smile, sparkling brilliantly with happiness, spread over his handsome face. "Is this the usual way your people confess their love?" he said and merriment was ringing in his voice. She blushed in embarrassment and averted her gaze.
Legolas moved closer and raised her chin with his hand, looking into the beautiful face of the person that had come to mean the world to him. He could have talked for hours trying to describe his feeling for her in an adequate way, but in his heart he new that it would only be a weak attempt, a waste of breath.
Words can be very powerful and yet sometimes they can be utterly useless. They can be as sharp as the sharpest knife and destroy a person's life. They can start and end wars, decide over life or death. The only think they cannot do is express precisely how we really feel. We build complicate and intriguing works of art with our words, but in the end they are just phantoms that exist to keep up the illusion of a meaning that either isn't there at all or so insignificant that it is barely noticed by anyone. It is best to speak in the simplest words, in order to give them more power, so that they come as close as possible to the essence of what we really want to express with them.
Legolas knew of all that and when he looked at her, remembered what they had lived through together so far, tried to comprehend how much she really meant to him, his mind was flooded with a multitude of words to describe his feelings for her. But all of them were too insignificant to be uttered, so he tenderly took her hand in his and placed a kiss in its palm before he placed it over his heart. "This is yours and it will stay this way for the rest of all times." he said, his eyes never leaving hers. "I wish I could express my feelings better, but whatever I say, will not be able to describe the extend of my love for you. Let my deeds speak for themselves. Let me love you with my every touch, every gaze and every breath. Will you grant me this wish?" She nodded with tears of joy shining in her eyes and finally their lips joined in a soft and tender kiss of true love.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Many of you have suggested that I should turn this into an original fiction. Well, I think that's a good idea, but it might not be as simple as changing the names, because when I wrote this I was really imagining Legolas, Aragorn, Gimli and Gandalf. If I remodelled all of it, it would mean that I would have to create a new set of characters. (Having a dwarf, an elf, a wizard and an human in a party - and also the bit at Rivendell - remind me a bit too much of Tolkien) So if I'm going to do this I'll go all the way!! I'm really thinking about this and maybe there will be an original fiction. But first of all I have to get the whole story out of my system (, because I have it all planned out in a certain way in my head)! So please put up for a little while with me not writing canon! *begs*
