Konnichiwa, minna! Sita-chan is back with yet another chapter of Reflections of a Teenage Telekinetic! I know it's been a while, sorry. ^-^;;; The next two chapters are going to deal with Schwarz's vacation. Oh, damn, what have I gotten myself into? I kind of picked names from a hat to see who would room with who. Hope you enjoy it! ^-^
Disclaimers: Sita-chan doesn't own Nagi or any of the Schwarz or Weiß boys. She's just borrowing them to amuse her own twisted imagination. Ivy was created by her, and Nora belongs to her good buddy, Fae-chan. Please don't sue them. They're broke.
Warnings: General stupidity and Disney World-bashing (don't get me wrong, I love Disney World, but I don't think it's Schwarz's kind of place ^-^)
blah= thought
//blah\\= telepathy
*~*~*~* blah *~*~*~*= something in Nagi's journal
I sat on the couch that with the obnoxious tiki print and pretended that I was home. Ah, Tokyo. Good, old, I-don't-give-a-damn-who-you-are-just-gimme-your-money Tokyo. The whore of a city called Tokyo. Sure, Tokyo doesn't give a shit about what happens to its inhabitants, but at least it feels human. Most of America feels human. It's just this Disney World place that's fucked up. It shouldn't feel as happy as it does.
"Braindead Americans," Schuldig muttered darkly as he trudged away from the concierge of the Polynesian Hotel. I smirked at him.
"Have a seat." He glanced warily at the annoying tiki couch.
"That thing's so bright, it'll probably burn through my ass if I sit on it." I snickered as the somewhat pissy German collapsed onto the horrible couch next to me. "These idiots don't speak a word of anything besides English and Spanish, so Crawford and The Bitch are dealing with them." I sank into the overly-fluffy couch and glanced over at the concierge. Nora had a firm grip on the spiked choker around Farfarello's neck. The said Irishman was attempting to bite the small children, an act which I found quite amusing. Crawford, however, did not at all find it amusing. He was waving his arms in Farf's face and apparantly screaming his head off. I couldn't tell over the low roar of the excited little kids. Ivy was flirting with the guy behind the desk, a tactic she uses to get us out of spending the money that Esset gives us for business reasons. We let Esset think that we spent it on business stuff, and then pocket it. Schuldig poked me in the shoulder.
"We're being summoned." He grinned and pointed to where Crawford was waving us over. We trudged to the other members of our somewhat conspicuous group.
"All right, guys," Nora said. "We have three rooms."
"Half-price," Ivy chimed in proudly.
"Bitch," Schuldig muttered with a smirk.
"Slut," Ivy retorted. Crawford glared at them. I don't think he understands that they're just joking. Come to think of it, I don't think Crawford understands the general concept of joking.
"How are we splitting up?" Nora asked. "Like we always do?" Crawford shook his head.
"Nagi, Mercoda, I don't want you rooming together."
"WHAT?!" we yelled. What the hell?! Ivy and I always went together! It was almost a god damn rule! Crawford waited calmly for Ivy to stop babbling angrily in Spanish.
"The last thing we need is a troop of American cops trying to arrest you for statutory rape."
.....Was he insinuating what I thought he was insinuating?
//I think he is, chibi. He thinks you're screwing The Bitch.\\
//Shut up, Schu.\\
Ivy was slowly turning red. I wasn't sure if it was from embarrassment or if she was just plain pissed.
The latter turned out to be true.
"YOU GOD DAMN PERVERT!" she howled. A very, very pissed-off Ivy launched herself at Crawford and proceeded to bang his head into the ground.
"Mercoda, get off of me! SHIT!"
"HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT?!" A long stream of angry Spanish followed. I carefully pulled Ivy off Crawford.
"Ivy, people are staring," I hissed. She glared at the surrounding crowd of hotel guests, who quickly dispersed....Very quickly. I stormed up to Crawford who was squinting through a black eye and poked him in the chest. "You'd better be joking, Brad."
"Don't call me Brad. And I'm not joking."
"Crawford, why the HELL would I be having sex with Ivy when she's twenty?!"
"Look, I've pretended not to know for a long time now and didn't say anything. Esset doesn't like their employees sleeping together."
Must...not...kill...Crawford...
"Let me rephrase this...." I said through gritted teeth. "Why would I be having sex with Ivy when I'M GAY?!"
Everyone stopped dead.
Crawford's mouth opened and closed for a few seconds. Then he shook his head and walked off. Nora's eyes were the size of baseballs. She stared at me for a few seconds before shaking her head and smiling. She walked off to give Crawford a piece of his sanity back. Schuldig grinned at me.
//It's about time you told them, chibi.\\
//Shut up, Schuldig.\\ I looked at Farfarello. I was waiting for some kind of "homosexuality hurts God" remark, but all he gave me was a shrug.
"Why did I not know this before now?!"
Oh, crap.
I turned to face a displeased Ivy.
"Erm, Ivy-"
"Oh, no you don't!" She poked me in the chest. "I thought we agreed that when anything major happens, I'm the first to know! This includes discoveries about your sexual orientation!"
"I'm sorry?"
"Rephrase into the form of a statement!"
"I'm sorry." She smirked at me.
"You'd damn well better be." She sighed and glanced over at Nora and Crawford. "I'd better go apologize to the bastard." She trudged over to our extremely displeased leader. I yanked out my laptop. I love my laptop. My laptop is my savior. It's a genius. It can do no wrong. I'm rambling. Anyway....
SomeRandomGuy322: Hey, hey!
Well, it's about god damn time he got on!
KissMyAssAuthority: Where've you been?
He didn't say anything for a minute.
SomeRandomGuy322: Vacation. It sucked.
KissMyAssAuthority: I know the feeling. You'll never guess where I am.
SomeRandomGuy322: Where?
KissMyAssAuthority: America. Disney World.
SomeRandomGuy322: :::laughs hysterically::: Having fun?
KissMyAssAuthority: Oh, yeah, loads of fun. My aunt gave my father a black eye in front of a thousand Americans.
SomeRandomGuy322: Ouch...She really doesn't like him, huh?
KissMyAssAuthority: You're observant. No, she doesn't.
"Nagi! Get over here!"
KissMyAssAuthority: Crap. I gotta go spend "quality time" with the family.
SomeRandomGuy322: I understand. Hey, when you get back....Maybe do you want to hang out or something?
I raised an eyebrow.
"Nagi! NOW!" I ignored Crawford.
Why not?
KissMyAssAuthority: Sure, what the hell? I'll tell you when I get back. See you.
SomeRandomGuy322: Bye!
I logged off and shut my laptop down before joining my "family." Nora held out a pile of paper.
"Pick one," she said cheerfully.
"What are they?"
"Names. Of who's rooming with who."
Something told me that this was going to be a disaster.
I reluctantly reached out and grabbed a piece of paper. With a horrible foreboding feeling, I unfolded it.
Well....
At least it wasn't Crawford.
Schuldig slapped me on the back with a huge grin on his face.
"We're gonna be roommates, chibi!"
Shoot me.
Shoot me in the head with an elephant rifle.
*****
*~*~*~*
Journal of Nagi Naoe
8/23
Only Schwarz will randomly decide to pull you out of school and drag you halfway around the world for a vacation. It's not the being out of school thing that I'm complaining about. It's being here in Disney World where there's way too much happy shit. I've been stuck in this room with Schuldig for an hour waiting for everyone else to get unpacked. The only person who's got it worse than me is Ivy. She's stuck with Farf. I can hear her next door. "Farf, put the lamp down! Throwing it through the window won't hurt God!" It's actually pretty amusing.
Schuldig must have brought his entire closet with him, which is quite extensive. I don't know what he's planning on doing with all that leather. There aren't any clubs in Disney World. I think he's about finished, so I'd better get ready to go. We're doing MGM Studios and Epcot today. I'm dreading tomorrow. It's Animal Kingdom and the Magic Kingdom. Farf + animals= dead animals. Farf + the Magic Kingdom = VERY BAD IDEA. It's time to go. I'll write more later.
*~*~*~*
I shut the journal and shoved it under my pillow. Schuldig yanked a black shirt over his head before looking at me suspiciously.
"What's that thing you're always writing in?" he questioned.
"My journal." Damn Schuldig and his evil smirks.
"What does little Nagikins have written in there? Would little Nagikins be upset if I gave his journal to our leader and resident dildo owner?"
I stared at him.
"Not particularly. But you would. It has stuff written about you and your precious Yo-tan."
And the score is: Nagi, ten. Schuldig, zero.
Schuldig stared blankly at me for a few seconds before patting the pillow gently.
"This journal is officially under my protection!"
"Shut up, you idiot. Let's go." We trudged somewhat reluctantly out of our room. The door on the right of us opened, and Farfarello tore out of it, dragging Ivy, who was attempting to pull him back by his choker, with him. Ivy stared at us.
"Kill me now. Please. Schu, fry my brain. Do it." Schuldig patted her sympathetically on the head.
"That'd be too quick a death for you, you bitch," he said cheerfully.
"Man-whore," Ivy muttered bitterly as Farf dragged her down the hallway. The door to the left opened. Crawford and Nora exited calmly.
"Oh, crap," Nora muttered. "Farf, stop!" Farfarello stopped dead in his tracks. "Come back." He turned on his heels and raced back to Nora's side. Ivy finally lost her grip, tripped, and her face and the carpet exchanged greetings. I extended my arm and smirked at her. She grabbed my hand and pulled herself up.
"Don't you smirk at me. It's not funny."
"Yes it is." Crawford cleared his throat to get our attention.
"All right, Schwarz-"
"Cut the mission crap, Brad," Schuldig cut in as he leaned against the wall and popped a cigarette into his mouth. The vein in Crawford's forehead pulsed ominously. That vein is pretty funny. I'm waiting for it to pop one day and have a second head or something under it. Crawford with a head sprouting from his forehead....Interesting.
"Do. Not. Call. Me. Brad." Nora reached up and patted Crawford on the shoulder.
"Calm down. You're going to get another headache."
I swear, that girl is an angel or something. Not just with Crawford, with everyone. You can be in the pissiest mood you've ever been in, but if Nora walks in the room, poof! It's gone and you've got a big, shiteating grin on your face. Then again, maybe angel isn't the most accurate word...Angels don't jam knives into people's backs. Angel of death maybe? Shinigami?
I finally yanked myself out of my random musings when I realized that Crawford had been babbling for a good three minutes.
"...MGM Studios, and then we'll hit Epcot. This is supposed to be a very relaxing place."
"Too happy," Farfarello muttered quietly from his position on the floor. I'd almost forgotten that he was there. Farfie talks in spurts. Some days, we can't shut him up. Other days, he's completely silent. "Too much God." His eye lit up. "Can I kill something?"
"No, Farfarello, you can't." Farf sighed sadly and resumed scratching random designs into Nora's sneakers with a pocketknife.
"All right, let's go." With that, we, the assassins known as Schwarz, turned to take on our hardest mission yet:
Disney World.
Oh, the horror.
*****
I quickly leaped to the left to avoid being trampled by a herd of six or seven screaming eight-year-olds.
For the third time in ten minutes.
I glanced over at my teammates. Schuldig had smoked about twelve cigarettes in the ten minutes that we'd been there. Nora was whispering something to Crawford and had Farfarello by the hand to keep him from killing anyone/anything. Ivy walked directly behind me. I think she was trying to block some of the cutesiness from getting to her. And we were only in MGM Studios. I couldn't wait to see Farf in the Magic Kingdom.
That was sarcasm, in case you couldn't tell.
"That actually looks pretty cool," Schuldig said. He gestured to the large burned building with the words "Hollywood Tower" written on it. It was pretty interesting.
"Let's check it out," Crawford said with a shrug. The six of us followed a few people into a gate. We walked up a long winding ramp until we met with the end of the very long line.
"Crap, look at this line," Ivy muttered. "There's no way I'm sitting in this for an hour."
Ivy was right. We didn't sit in the line for an hour.
We sat there for two hours.
After a very, very long two hours, we reached the entrance of the building. I followed the people in front of me to what looked like a boiler room with three elevator doors. The six of us lined up in front of one.
"What's this ride about anyway?" Schuldig asked as he admired the somewhat creepy boiler room.
"It's called the Tower of Terror," Nora replied. "Apparantly, this used to be a hotel, but the elevator crashed and a bunch of people died. Now, they supposedly haunt the building. It was turned into a ride." Ivy stared at her blankly.
"So we're going to ride a haunted elevator."
"Basically, yes."
"This is shit." The doors opened and an old-fashioned bellhop shooed us inside. We sat on a long bench in the front row, and a metal bar lowered across our laps. Two girls behind us began to mutter excitedly in English. From my limited English, this is what I heard: something something, ride, something, something, scary, something, something, drop. I really should learn English. Spanish, at the very least. Ivy's offered to teach me, but-
I'm rambling again.
Quite suddenly, the elevator began to rise, jolting me out of my thoughts. A rather stupid movie played on the screen about how a bolt of lightning struck the Hollywood Hotel one day and an elevator crashed.
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever seen," Schuldig muttered as some computer-generated ghosts ominously waved lightning bolts at as. The elevator came to a stop and the screen opened to reveal the outside world.
We were really high up.
And if there's one thing I can't stand, it's heights.
Without any warning, the damn thing dropped towards the ground. I proceeded to come an inch from crapping myself and started to scream. Farfarello snickered next to me and jabbed me in the side.
"Your screams are unfortunate," he said with a grin. "Other people's misfortunes hurt God!"
"SHUT UP, FARF, OR I'LL PUKE ON YOU!"
"And the chibi has some rancid puke! I should know, he hurled on my bed last year!"
I fought on keeping my breakfast in my stomach and made a mental note to kill Schuldig and Farfarello later. Ivy looked like she was actually enjoying herself.
"This isn't so bad, you guys!"
Nora was sitting very calmly next to Crawford, her hands by her sides. She smiled and easily handed me a mint, despite the fact that about EIGHT THOUSAND POUNDS OF GRAVITY were pushing her arms up. As I chewed the mint, I noticed something amusing. Crawford's glasses had fallen off and were nowhere to be found. He was blinking frantically.
"I can't see!" I started to laugh.
Farf was right.
Other people's misfortunes are funny.
*****
I collapsed on a bench after the Tower of Terror. Damn Disney World, playing off of my fears! Ivy plunked down next to me.
"You okay, kid?"
"I think I am."
"I never knew you were afraid of heights. Roaches, I knew. Heights, I didn't."
"Can we not bring up the roach thing?" Schuldig walked up and cheerfully mussed my hair.
"Feeling better, chibi?" He acknowledged Ivy's presence. "Hi, Bitch."
"Greetings, Slut."
"Where's everyone else?" Schuldig snickered.
"Nora took our somewhat blind, not-so-fearless leader to try and get some contacts or something. He can't see a thing."
"Where's Farfarello?" Ivy asked suspiciously. Schuldig cocked his head.
"Over there by the lamp post." I squinted.
"Schuldig...He's not there." Schuldig whirled around.
"Oh, crap," he hissed.
"What?"
"....Farf's loose."
We looked at each other for a few seconds, then tore off in opposite directions.
*****
"Farf! FARFARELLO!" I yelled. I'd been looking for Schwarz's resident crazy Irish guy for a half an hour. I was hoarse, hot, tired, and thirsty, not to mention the fact that a God-hating maniac was on the loose.
"Nagi!" Nora raced up beside me. "Where is everyone?"
"Schuldig lost Farf." Her large red eyes grew even bigger.
"You've got to be kidding me!"
"I wish I was."
"We've got to find him before he kills someone!"
"We've been looking for him for a half an hour." The happy music on the loudspeakers stopped for a minute. An English voice spread over the theme park. I didn't have a clue what the guy said, but I did catch one word: Farfarello. "What did he say?"
"They've got Farf at the information kiosk."
"Where the hell is the information kiosk? Come to think of it, what the hell's a kiosk?!"
"Calm down, Nagi." I sighed and wiped the sweat off of my face. Nora studied one of Disney World's conveniently placed maps. "It's right over there!" She pointed at a small white tent a few feet away. We raced over to it. Schuldig ran up a few seconds later, followed by Ivy. Crawford was the last to arrive. He still didn't have his glasses, but it looked like he could see. We silently decided to let Crawford handle it as we entered the tent. Our missing Irishman was standing calmly in a corner. He was covered in blood.
That was not a good sign.
Two Americans were yelling at each other. Crawford stepped forward with an air of importance. He gets those odd auras around him every now and then. He conversed with the Americans for a few minutes. They didn't look happy from the way that they yelled a lot and pointed at the exit. Crawford looked shocked for a second, then nodded.
"Farfarello, get over here." Farf didn't move.
"Farfie, come here," Nora said quietly. Farf's face lit up, and he walked calmly to Nora's side.
"What did he do?" I asked. Crawford sighed and massaged his temples.
"He got into the Animal Kingdom and killed a giraffe. They were going to have him arrested, but I explained that he's insane." I stared blankly. "But I'm not going to punish him." Ivy raised an eyebrow.
"That's not like you. Why not?" Crawford smirked a very Schu-ish smirk.
"We're getting kicked out of Disney World. Permanently."
We all stared at each other before erupting into cheers and patting Farfarello on the back.
The Americans thought we were crazy.
*****
I relaxed on the hotel bed and pretended to listen to Schuldig's bitching.
"I can't believe I unpacked all of my stuff and now I have to pack it again!"
"Uh-huh." Something dawned on me. "Hey, Schu, what are we going to do for the next day and a half? We can't leave until then." He smirked his trademark smirk.
"I've convinced Crawford to let us go on a road trip. We're going to rent a car and drive around and goof off." Suddenly, his smirk faded. A strange look came into his eyes. Kind of nostalgic. I raised an eyebrow.
"What's wrong?"
"It's just...Seeing Brad without those awful glasses made me think back to when I first met him. He didn't have to wear those damn things all the time back then." He smiled sadly and looked at me. "I loved him, you know."
"I know." Schuldig looked shocked.
"How'd you know?" I shrugged.
"I didn't really. It was more of an assumption."
"I was that obvious?" I grinned and shrugged. "It faded after a while. He's just such a bastard sometimes. And now I've got Youji." Schuldig nodded suddenly. "I'm going to have a chat with Yo-tan. Want to listen in?"
"On you two having phone sex? I think not."
"It's more of telepathy sex, actually." I rolled my eyes. "I'll tell him that you said hi."
"Whatever." I trudged out of the room and into the hallway. We'd been in Disney World for less than a day and we were already being booted out. It just goes to show you that you never know what will happen.
For some reason, I felt strangely happy. I liked not knowing exactly what was going to happen.
I couldn't help wondering what the next few days would bring.
OWARI
Well, that took an obnoxiously long time to write. I don't own Disney World. Did I mention that? A Schwarz road trip should be fun. Stay tuned for more Nagi-ness! Tell them, Nagi!
Nagi: *reluctantly trudged out in a pink bunny suit* Must I do this?
If you don't, you're not getting any in this story.
Nagi: .....No sex with Omi?
No sex with ANYONE.
Nagi: Meep! Erm, please review so that I can get laid!
Do the dance!
Nagi: *sighs* *reluctantly hops in a circle* *sings* This is the bunny dance, the bunny dance, the bunny dance. This is the bunny dance, doo-doo-doo-doo-dooooo-dooooo.
*pats Nagi on the head* Good boy. REVIEWS MAKE CHAPTERS COME FASTER! *begs*
