Welcome to my angsty song fic,
Disclaimer-don't own Bakura and I don't own the song 'Bother'
Author notes-set in Egypt, a side story to Kinta's (OC) past, time wise it's the night she saw/heard her mother's death. Bakura is kinda O.O.C. … make that a lot.
What my beta-reader said- *jawdrop*; very good. And evil.
~*~*~
Wish I was too dead to cry
My self affliction fades
Stones to throw at my creator
Masochists to which I cater
Kinta sat in the temple, her mother was dead, tears filled her eyes but refused to fall, Kinta wouldn't cry. She couldn't: not anymore. She ran the dagger along her palm, blood dripping; staining the stone floor. She didn't feel it, she didn't feel anything; couldn't. She let the blood fall. Numb to the world, she sat. She heard someone at the door.
" Go away." Kinta didn't even look at her visitor.
"You know I won't." Kinta looked up at the voice.
"Bakura." She whispered. She turned her face away and waited for him to leave, but he didn't. Instead he walked over to her and took the dagger away, he held her hand and looked at the cut.
"Didn't go for death just pain." He commented, "Don't do it," Bakura pleaded looking at her, " she's gone we can't change that, go on, for her. Seek revenge on the one who did it."
"Bakura, just go, I don't need you pity."
"Not giving you pity, just some advice."
"Well, don't."
"Can't help it, whether you like it or not I do give a damn about if you live or die. I care."
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'til it bleeds
Kinta slipped another dagger along her arm drawing more blood; Bakura took it also, "Stop, you're not helping."
"I can't feel it Bakura." Kinta said staring at her arm, "It's like it's not me I'm hurting."
"No; it's me you're hurting."
Wish I was too dead to care
If indeed I cared at all
Kinta looked at Bakura for a moment, wondering about his words, he really did seem to care, maybe… She returned to the familiarity of watching her blood fall. It wasn't much the cut was shallow. Bakura took her arm.
"Will you stop this?" he traced the cuts on her arm with a finger, then he traced the scars, cuts from long ago that had left their mark. "If not for you for me maybe?"
Never had a voice to protest
So you fed me shit to digest
I wish I had a reason
my flaws are open season
Kinta was silent, what could she say? She couldn't promise what he wanted; it was impossible to think of anyone else at the moment. She was the first in her mind, now that her mother was dead she had no one, even if she was to kill the pharaoh-her father, what good would it do? You can't bring the dead back to life. If she died too then at least it'd all be over.
For this I gave up trying
One good turn deserves my dying
Bakura started wrapping
her cuts up. She sat ignorant to what he did. Too deep in thought and sorrow to
care.
As Bakura finished her arm Kinta came back to reality, she saw him, there he
had a look about him, different from usual, he looked almost gentle, he usually
was so harsh, but he looked different tonight. She turned away. No one was
supposed to care; when people cared they got hurt. She'd seen it happen
countless times. It was better if he hated her. She didn't want to live with
the guilt if he got hurt. One death was enough
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'til it bleeds
.
Bakura watched Kinta, so hurt and dead to the world, she wouldn't accept his
love, and he knew it, made it hurt all the more. They meet gazes once again and
she fell into him, giving up. She was holding onto his chest as if she would
die if she let go. Bakura put his arms around her and held her; he felt her
tears finally come as they wetted his bare chest. He held her, the bitter and
violent priestess crying in his arms. The strangeness of the scene didn't fully
hit him. He just held her; he let her cry til there was nothing left. When she
finally rose from him, he felt chilled from the night air on his chest.
Kinta looked at him, unsure of what she felt
for the thief, but she did know one ting, she needed him now. His eyes offered
her everything he had to give. She wanted it too. Giving into gluttony she sank
into a deep kiss and let everything go.
In depression and sorrow she took what he offered her.
Wish I'd died instead of
lived
A zombie hides my face
As the sun rose she
looked at Bakura, remembering what she'd done last night, what they'd done. She
gazed at the sleeping form on the ground, she didn't love him, but he loved
her, that'd get him killed someday not just physically but emotionally. In one
night she'd messed everything up, let he mother die and now used Bakura like
that. She knew what she meant to him, but to her he was just a partner, some
thief pulled off the streets and into the mess the priests had made, he was her
ally, nothing more. He'd die for her in an instant, but she wouldn't have that.
He deserved better then to die for a bitch like herself. She concentrated and used the Sennen band,
rewriting his memories. She wove lies though his mind, when he awoke he would
remember nothing of their night.
Shell forgotten with its memories
Diaries left
with cryptic entries
Bakura awoke and looked around himself, he was in Kinta's chambers… why? He thought for a moment then remembered; he'd come in last night and then what?
"Good you're up, get going before they catch you. You can't get caught yet, there's too much to do. He's suspicious, now too. Last night proved it. I said get moving!"
Bakura remembered, the queen had been killed last night, he'd come to comfort Kinta, but she had refused his comfort to his disappointment, he'd stayed though and obviously fell asleep. Bakura got up shakily and slipped out of the temple. Wishing Kinta would let him in and help thaw her frozen heart.
Kinta sank to the ground as he left. He didn't remember, thank Ra. Too bad she still remembered it. The tears came again. She felt guilty that he cared for her; her a disowned child of the pharaoh, mother dead by the father she was trying to overthrow. She was a twisted soul, and she didn't want his love or his pity. She took up a dagger and reopened the cuts on her arm, waiting for the pain to hit her; but it never did.
And you don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'til it bleeds
~*~2 years later~*~
"I'm sealing myself in Bakura."
"Why? We're so close! Seto's dueling him right now! Victory is soon!"
"Bakura. No. I'm sealing my self in the band. You can't and won't stop me. Don't bother; I'm not worth your words. And Bakura?"
"What?"
The band glowed. And Bakura fell to the ground.
"Forget I ever existed." Kinta wiped his memory clean of her. " And I'll forget you." The band worked its power for the last time this age; it wiped Kinta's memory of Bakura. The body on the ground suddenly meant nothing to her, it became someone she never knew. Then she sealed her soul in the band for the ages to come.
And so Bakura's love could never hurt him and Kinta would never have to carry the guilty memory of the night. His love was lost as he forgot ever knowing her, and she became bitter all the more having lost the memory of someone else really loving her-even if she couldn't in return. Eternity blinded them to each other, no need to bother remembering what had gone on between them. Between two lost souls in a night of pain and anguish.
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I'll never live down my deceit
~*~Owari~*~
