Sorry, Minna-san.  I updated Chapter 4 of The Difference Between Rain and Tears.  My mistake.

Chapter 4

By Crystal

Author's Notes: As I have told you all before, time flies by very fast.  But I think it'll stop somewhere in this chapter or the next one.  Enjoy!  A lot of memories/flashbacks too!

*Screw the disclaimers ^^;;*

November 7th, 1878

I'm at Otsu right now and Kenji is at Hiko-san's practising again.  He was here a week ago, coming to travel by himself.  So it's been around seven months since I came to Kyoto.  I've been receiving Toshiko and Kaoru's letters all the time, at least once a month.  Toshiko says Kaoru finally found someone that she likes, although she won't describe him to me.  Said Kaoru forbid her to do so because she wanted to surprise me or something.  Ah well, I'm going back in around three to fives months along with Kenji.  I can wait that long.

I close my journal and take the most recent letter from Tokyo...  Sent by Kaoru.

Tomoe-san,

How's Kenji?  Even though I've never seen him and he's never seen me, I guess I should ask.  He is kind of like my brother, since you're a bit like my mother.  You're becoming everyone's mother...  Toshiko's, mine, Kenji's...  Even Enishi too, if he were here.  Anyways, as I have told you before, I still have my eyes on that one man.  Never told you anything about him, so I'll just say a bit, don't want to give out too much information or you'll start trying to figure out what he looks like.  He's pretty handsome, and he's saved my life for...  A few dozen times, probably.  He's really strong. No physical discriptions for you, since I want it to be a surprise!  I'll confess to him once you come back.  The second you come back...  How about...  March... 5th?  1879, of course.  That's it.  Come to the Akabeko then and bring your son too!  I can't wait to see how handsome and cute your son is.  He's fourteen, is he not?  When I see Kenji, you'll get to meet 'him' and 'he'll' get to meet the both of you.  I'll get to meet Kenji too!  Anyways, I'll see you later!

-Kamiya Kaoru

'He' doesn't know about you since Toshiko's always working at the Akabeko and we don't talk about you often, only when we're alone.  Oh right, I have two other friends, excluding 'him'.  A freeloader named Sagara Sanosuke and a 10-year-old brat name Myojin Yahiko.  Then there's Takani Megumi, a female doctor.  You probably know Yahiko's parents, I don't...  Until I met him.  Though his parents have both passed away.  Poor kid.  Oh right, 'he' saved a kid a few years back, I heard.  He's slightly older than Kenji...  I think he's seventeen right now.  Oh right, see you on March 5th!

I smile.  March 5, I can't wait to see the man Kaoru has fallen for.  If lucky, I might even be able to tease him a bit before Kaoru starts yelling at me, or hitting me.  Although, he sounds a bit like someone I know.  Or I knew.  Kenshin.  But then again, there were lots of people from the revolution who were strong and handsome.  ...Saving Kaoru a few times?  Got to be pretty strong.  Ah well, whatever.

Once again, I slipped into my futon and went to sleep, prepared for the next day's walk.  Where?  Well, I was going to go where 'our' house used to be and walk around...  Then I'm following the trail up the mountain, where the blood stained the white snow.  Where my blood stained the snow.  And where I had last seen my husband.

Morning came quickly and I dressed up, taking a breath of fresh air that burned my lungs, but woke me up pretty nicely.  I wore the new shawl I had gotten in Otsu last week around my neck like a scarf and continued slowly up the mountain.  It was the same one in Tokyo right now, same shade of violet, but it was newer, of course.  The one I gave Kenshin that ended up on the cross was really old, but I kept it still.  I reached the trail and looked up, having that familiar feeling.  When I had walked up this snow covered trail fourteen fifteen years ago, my mind was in turmoil.  When I am planning on walking up this trail fifteen years later, my stomach is tied in knots by the nervousness.  I wonder what I will be seeing when I reach the wooden house. 

As I reached the wooden house half an hour later, I remember the memories clearly, as if it was engraved in my memory.  And it probably was...

"That's right.  No matter how cold a killer he may be, there is not a single soul who does not want a conversation.  His greatest weakness right now is you.  He is on his way here now.  Now that he knows the woman he loves is a traitor, his heart must be in chaos.  He probably is unable to draw from his true inner strength right now.  This is our true goal.  Do you understand now?"

The snow...  everything was right.  All that was missing, was the blood.  No, I did not enjoy seeing blood.  People might think of me as a crazy woman if I had said right now that the snow was missing blood, but it was. 

"Ai...shi...te...ru... Ken...shin..."

"Aishiteru, Tomoe.  Zutto."

Even now, I can still hear his voice in my head, telling me that one last sentence he had told me before I had fallen unconscious.  I remember how the snow was falling gentilly towards the back of his head and towards me and how the snow turned red whenever it touched the crimson stained snow.  I remember too well how I had taken my tanto and crossed out Kiyosato's wrong.  How I had made a cross scar.  Unknowingly, a tear rolled down my cheek softly and I said the words I had, so long ago.  "Aishiteru...  Kenshin.  Zutto."

"Okaasan..."  I turned around, surprised.  "Are you all right?"

Kenji...  I wiped away the tear quickly, "Yes, I'm fine.  Why are you here?"

"I came to visit you and started on the trip yesterday before afternoon and I just got here when you left the house, so I followed you.  Thinking about Otousan again?"  I nodded.  "Really, how was Battousai?  Was he a mad man like everyone claimed him to be, or was he more than that?"

I signaled him to come in the wooden house and he followed after me.  As soon as I reached inside, I saw a few drops of blood on the floor.  Seeing it made me a bit more comfortable.  At least not all traces of that day had been erased...  "His name was Himura Kenshin and I'll tell you all that happened started from a few weeks before I met him..."  A pause.  "I received a letter that my fiancé, Kiyosato Akira was murdered.  I heard that the Hitokiri Battousai killed him, so I went all the way to Kyoto to have revenge..."

"You...remarkably made it rain.  Rain of blood."

"Don't bother with me."

"Don't you know, a sword needs a sheath.  How much longer will you continue killing people?  I want to see with my own eyes...  ...My very own eyes."

"Ore wa...Kimi wo...Kimi wo mamoru.  Kimi wo, shiawase wa, ore wa mamoru.  After all this...  I will return to you...  And I will protect."

"I'm...  going to be a father...?"

"Ai...shi...te...ru... Ken...shin..."

"Aishiteru, Tomoe.  Zutto."

"Otousan broke the promise."  Kenji said immediately after I had finished all the explaining.  He stood up and clenched his fists, "That man that you say is my father almost killed Okaasan!"

I stood up, "No...  I betrayed him and he had every right to kill me.  Although it was entirely my fault he had killed me.  I stood in front of him to blood the blow, I knew the consquences and I knew what would happen if he stabbed through.  I didn't die, that's the main thing.  I didn't, and I won't..."  A pause, then I said in a quieter voice, "Your father didn't know I was alive and he still doesn't.  He never knew.  Never...  That's what I've been waiting for for the past decade.  I want to see him...  I want to see the man that killed my fiancé almost sixteen years ago.  The Hitokiri Battousai was someone very kind inside, but had a cold mask to cover up all that.  He though emotions made him weak, and it did...  But I think I was the only one that would be brave enough to say that I knew him well."

A small smiled from Kenji, "You are his wife."

"Yes, I am his wife.  We'll be seeing your other 'siblings' soon.  We're leaving during the middle of February.  Tell Hiko-san that when you arrive back a week later.  I'll either be in Kyoto already or I'll be picking you up."

An excited cheer broke out by Kenji, but he suddenly frowned at looked at the blood stains on the floor.  "Whose blood are these?"  He asked suddenly.

"Mine," I said, but pushed him out the door, ignoring all the questions he had suddenly launched at me.  "Now hurry up Kenji, we're going to Hisashi-san's and then you're staying for a few days before you're going back to Hiko-san.  We wouldn't want you to be sick, now would we?

"Was Otousan nice?"

I smiled at his question, a question that I would gladly reply, "The nicest man alive.  He had the purest heart, but was given the job of the devil due to his Kenjitsuu skills.  Promise me you won't make the mistake your father made.  Don't go off killing people, not even if you want to protect someone, but if killing is really needed, kill them off as soon as possible so they won't feel the pain.  That is what your father did.  I am proud that I have a son like you are, Kenji."  I said truthfully.

"Really?"

"Yes really.  Now let's hurry up, if we're fast enough, I might even decide to show you where we lived when we were hiding from the Shinsengumi."

He ran in front of me, then suddenly stopped and turned around, "What would you do when you meet Otousan again?  What should I do?  I've never met him."

His question got me thinking hard.  What would I do when I saw Kenshin again?  What would he do?  I shrugged, "I guess I would do what felt right.  Perhaps hug him?  Perhaps start yelling at him?  And you?  I don't know, maybe surprise him by saying 'father'?  He never did know he had a son."

He smiled again, I loved that smile I rarely saw on Kenshin's face, "Or maybe I can challenge him to a duel, after all, I know the Kuzu Ryu Sen and Otousan doesn't know...  But then again, it'd be nice fighting with Battousai and someone so experienced...  And, I might kick his rear."

I said the only answer that came to my mind, "You might, you never know."

XenoMark – I don't think I'll make anyone die in this fic...  Well, maybe Shishio, but I still don't know about that.

(no name) – Currently, he's at the Kamiya Kasshin Dojo ^^

Blueraingurl – I can't picture Tomoe as an old lady, just can't.  She pretty much stays the same for the whole story...  Cold sometimes, but when Kenji's there, she's much happier.

Sakura Alex – I think I'll make it for everyone to see, except one person, but you'll have to find out ^^

Author's Notes: Next chapter, Tomoe meets Kenshin and obviously, Kenshin gets a big shock.  I'm already half way through that chapter, and I'm going to re-edit it for a few more days.  Hope you enjoy!  I can't believe I'm uploading at least 2 fics per day.  I need a little break from 'The Difference Between Rain and Tears', so the next chapter will be updated hopefully next week since I have to replan D:.  Later!~ :D