Yeah, that Adult Swim thinks it's pretty clever doesn't it? How does it expect to get good ratings if it keeps switching the Inu Yasha show to worse and worse times? Now it's on at 1:00am?? Crimany!

BTW, at least half of this chapter is told in Shippou's 3rd person POV
Chapter 9: Kitsune See, Foxy Doggy Do

(Translation: Dog Fox Teacher!)

Shippou was just crashing with the dogs. Apparently, everyone was supposed to be on the shard hunt, but since Kagome had the flu, or allergy, or whatever it was, all of the adults were going to try and figure out how to cure her. Puppy Shippou was curled up next to the Kagome puppy. The heat was unbearable! It was so hot, even the dogs laid around panting and sweating.

Shippou looked over and saw Inu Yasha sitting in a tree with Shio, while the humans were on the ground at least ten feet away. Shippou told the dogs, "I'll be right back." Then went and hopped onto the tree branch that Inu Yasha was on.

"Inu Yasha?" Shippou looked up at the stupid hanyo. He had his sleeves rolled back and sweat dripped down his forehead. This particular adult looked the most troubled.

"What, Shippou?!" Inu Yasha growled. Of course, Shippou had noticed that the heat made the guy grumpier. Actually, the cold made him grumpier too.......and the spring.......and the fall.......actually, Inu Yasha was a year round jerk! He didn't even take holidays off!

"What do you want?!" he asked even more grumpier then before.

"Inu Yasha, what is al-ler-gic?" Shippou asked. Which was a perfectly normal question but the hanyo dog was too mean to realize that and said, "Not the brightest star in the sky there, Dumbo."

Shippou looked up at the sky. He didn't see any stars. WAIT A MINUTE?! "Did you just call me dumbo?!"

Inu Yasha kicked him off the branch, which was also mean. Oh well, an eye for an eye.

"KAGOME!!" Shippou whined in the most pathetic voice he could make.

"Inu Yasha!" Kagome said. "Osuwari!!"

WHAM!!

Inu Yasha landed right next to Shippou on the ground. Then in his grumpy summer heat rage, grabbed the cute cuddly kit by the head and pushed in into the dirt. "Who do you think you are?!" he hissed at him.

"I just asked you a question, Baka!!" Shippou shouted at him. "All I wanted to know was what aller-gic means, and why does Kagome have one?"

Inu Yasha got up and walked away from him. "Don't bother me."

Shippou growled at him and was planning to bite the guy's ears right off of his fat and meaty head when he heard something land on the ground behind him. He turned to look and Shio sat on one knee, looking down at him. The fox/dog said, "Allergic, is when a person reacts a certain way to a certain thing."

"You mean like when Kagome says 'sit' so many times Inu Yasha gets a bloody nose?" Shippou asked.

Shio smiled and thought about that. It had happened a couple of days ago after he told them all about the princess. Shioppou could tell that Shio was holding an interesting secret, because he made this interested smile and his eyes twinkled with a foreign light. "Well, that's different, and I'll tell you why later. In this case, Kagome is "allergic" to dogs. Get it? It means she can't be around them, or else she'll have trouble breathing." He wiped some sweat off of his forehead. "Actually, it could be very dangerous in heat like this, not being able to breathe that is."

Shio stood up and said, "Hey? You're a kitsune aren't you?"

"Yeah!" Shippou said. Shio was now his new best friend! He was one of the first people to be able to figure out that Shippou was a fox and not a tanuki. Plus he just proved to be more patient then Inu Yasha!

Shio looked down at the large and admiring look on Shippou's face and looked confused. "Uh, what?"

"You're so cool!" Shippou said. The kid looked like Souta when he was with Inu Yasha.

Shio smiled, with a love for compliments. "Thanks, Meat! You're a good kit yourself!"

Shippou hopped up and down a little and said, "I wanna be like YOU!!"

Well, Shio had never been told THAT before! ^^ "Alright, cool!" he shook Shippou's hand. "Pimpmaster Aka Shio, of the Top Dogs." He said as if introducing himself for the first time.

"Shippou, of the Kagome Team!" Shippou replied.

Shio smiled then Shippou asked, "So why DID Inu Yasha get that nose bleed?"

Shio smiled that mysterious yet mischievous little smile again. How could he say it? Inu Yasha at ground level. Kagome above him. Short skirt. Bird's eye view. So hot in Herre!

"Well," Shio said. "Let's just say that a certain school girl, isn't as 'well prepared' as we think she is." He smiled and started to walk off. Shippou was still confused, but he went skipping after him anyway.

"Where are you going?" Shippou asked.

"I'm going to go see the princess, I don't even know her name yet!" He said. He continued to walk toward the conveniently close castle. When he got there he hopped into a tree and looked down at the people below. There was an old woman sitting with some priest talking and laughing. But just yonder of them, was the princess, in all of her beauty and purity. She sat by the water brushing her hair and looking down into the water.

Shio leaned forward. What was that expression on her face? She looked down at her reflection sadly, like she was thinking about some deep trouble that disturbed her. She really looked sad, and as Shio saw it, lonely.

'Don't be sad, princess!' Shio thought. 'Your admirer Shio is here!' but he wouldn't jump down, not for all of the Ming in China! Then he saw something move out of the corner of his eye and turned his attention toward it. Something small was moving through the tall grass over toward his princess. Then he realized what it was and his heart stopped pumping.

The princess heard the movement behind her and turned her head to see Shippou standing next to her. She just stared at him for a few seconds. Shippou smiled his cute little kitsune grin up at her and said, "Hi! My name is Shippou!"

She smiled back in a kind way and said, "Hello, Shippou! And my name is Shoppai!"

Shio's head spun and for a split second forgot about the danger of being found out. The name echoed in his mind like it was the greatest thing since oxygen had been invented. 'Shoppai, Shoppai, Shoppai!'

The princess glanced over at the old woman and the priest who were deep in conversation. Then she looked back at Shippou. "I don't think you should be around here." She said in a warning, yet still sweet tone of voice.

"Oh, okay. I just came over to say hi." Shippou said and grinned cutely.

She smiled back and patted him on the head. "You're cute!" she said. She pushed the hair off of his forehead and kissed it. Shippou smiled and went scampering off into the tall grass. He went in about thirty steps when he saw Shio. Shippou was confused at the expression on his face. He was about as green as his kimono! And he didn't have the most passionate of faces on at that moment.

Shio smiled hoping he would live up to his 'lover not a fighter' mantra. "Uh-hi, Shio!" he smiled a toothy grin.

Shio tried to calm himself down. A sex god wouldn't lose his cool like that. Then he remembered that he was going to teach Shippou. Of course, the only way to keep the freakishly cute kid away from his woman, was to help him find his own woman. Shippou was relieved to see that Shio was starting to lose his steam.

"So now what do we do?" Shippou asked.

Shio smiled again, and Shippou felt safe.

"Well, Meat," Shio said standing up and putting his hands on his hips. "Follow me, and I will show you what you need to know about being a sex god."

Shippou wasn't sure what he was talking about, but Shio was his new honorable sensei, so he followed him like the faithful student that he was.

---------------------------------

"OSWARI!!!"

WHAM!

(AN: Don't you just LOVE onomatopoeias?)

Kagome snorted back all of the crap that congested her, and blushed because afterwards felt very un-feminine. "You baka!" she shouted at Inu Yasha. "What did I say about staying away from me!!?"

Sango, who was sitting next to Miroku scratched her head and said, "Gee, houshi-sama, this sounds like one of our fights!"

He shook his head and said, "It's like déjà vu!"

Then Kagome looked around. "Hey! Where did Shippou and Shio go?"

Inu Yasha realized that it he had been feeling less annoyed for a while. And the atmosphere of pervertedness had decreased substantially.

Miroku jingled his staff to get their attention and said, "They left together a little while ago."

Kagome gasped like she had just heard Shippou was being held hostage by Naraku. "OH MY GOD!!"

Inu Yasha got up and bopped Miroku on the head. "Fool!! Why didn't you tell us earlier!?!"

"WHAT?!" Miroku looked around innocently, or as innocently as he could. "What's wrong with Shippou spending time with Shio?"

"........"

"Ohhhhhhh," Miroku said in realization.

"We'd better find them before Shippou loses any brain cells!" Sango said.

---------------------

"Love?" Shippou looked up at him.

"That's right." Shio said smiling. Shippou sat on a rock looking up at the pacing adult, who was trying to teach him the 'fine art of hunting, battling, taming, and capturing the heart of a woman.'

"Tell me what you think love is." Shio stopped pacing and looked down at him.

Shippou sat thinking. (AN: He looks so cute when he's thinking! ^^)

"I think love is......" he started. What complicated mishmash did he have to look at as an example? A grabby, touchy monk and the exterminator woman, who liked his charm, but not his personality; a wannabe playboy dog demon and the love triangle he put poor, innocent Kagome through, and for some reason it was OKAY for him to do this! But there was Shio and his princess, and Shippou's old parents......

"I think love is, when some people start acting all giggly and light headed, and start acting out of character.

Shio face faulted to the side. Oh what that poor fox child had been exposed to! (AN: Lord have mercy on his poor and badly educated mind!)

Shio got up and said, "Well, not exactly. Love is probably the single most complicated idea in the universe. There are 3 types of love-make that 5."

Shippou didn't need to be told it was complicated. That statement had bounced off of his forehead and back into the tall grass they were in before.

"The first one is "like."" Shio said. "That is what is between you and Kagome. Have you ever heard the term, 'love you but not in love with you?'"

Shippou shook his head.

"Well thankfully, neither have I." Shio said in a sex god, proud kind of way. And Shippou couldn't understand it, as it was sort of an inside joke. "That's the kind of love you have with your parents and friends."

Shippou nodded.

Shio went on, "Love number two!" he held up that amount of fingers. "Lust! That's basically a relationship based on physical love alone."

Shippou thought of that, "Physical love? You mean like kissing?"

Shio looked down at him for a few seconds in silence then folded his arms and said, "Sort of. It's the kind of love that Priestman expresses." (AN: And if you can't figure out who Priestman is, it's Miroku.)

Shippou, kind of understood so he just nodded. "Have you ever had lust?"

"No." Shio said plainly. "I have had something else, but I'll get to that in a moment. The next one is platonic love. That's when two people are in love, but there is no desire for physical love." Shio smiled proudly and said. "Kind of like the relationship between Inu Yasha and Kagome."

Shippou nodded in acknowledgement. "Is that what it is? I thought that it just ment Kagome wouldn't put out for that jerk!"

Shio gave Shippou a shocked look. That kid knew more about love then he thought! He was also surprised because Shio didn't know about that kind of thing until he was a little bit older. He could still remember the day his sister sent himself and Inu Yasha into town to get their sex talk.......

"Anyway," Shio said, trying not to go off topic. "The princess and I are also like that. We don't need sex to be in love!" he smiled and went starry eyed.

(AN: I said, trying NOT to go off topic!)

"Okay, okay, then the next one is artificial love." Shio said. "Actually, it isn't even love at all, but for some reason it's stored with the other categories. That's when a person shows an extreme amount of love, physical or otherwise, but there is no feeling of love at all. An example being what I used to do all of the time." He looked away from the kitsune cub smiling. Fun yet guilty memories.

But Shippou didn't understand either ways. Shio was acting really weird to him. He wondered if he was going to act like this when he grew up. Then he looked back up at Shio who had recovered. Shippou asked, "What's the last one?"

Shio looked a little bit disturbed and said, "Love triangles." He shuddered. "Nasty thing to get into really! The bad thing is, they don't just stop at triangles, they can be pentagrams, hexagrams, numerous people all in love with different people." He shook his head. "It's complicated, okay?"

Shippou thought about it and said, "Is it the same as Inu Yasha liking both Kikyo and Kagome?"

"Yes!" Shio said. "You are really getting this, Meat!"

"Actually." Shippou sweat dropped. "I'm as confused as a headless guy a hat store."

"Don't worry about it!" Shio said. "I barely understand it myself. I'll just show you some of the basics and you'll be all set."

---------------------------------

Well the rest of the group was searching frantically, hoping they would get there in time to protect Shippou's virgin mind.

"There he is! I see him!" Sango pointed over at Shio, who was leaning against a tree watching something. Inu Yasha was about to jump him, but Kagome got there first. She grabbed Shio by the front of his shirt and started to wring him. "Where's Shippou, you sicko!!?"

Shio smiled at her and said, "Frisky, are we?"

She let go, which was his goal. He smiled at all of their assuming glares and said, "Don't worry, he's right over there." He pointed at what he was watching.

There was a little demon cat girl, a little demon bunny girl, a little demon fox girl, two little human girls, and Shippou, all playing leap frog.

They were all laughing and having fun. "Okay! My turn!" Shippou said. He hopped over each little girl.

Everyone's jaw dropped. Shio smiled, "Teaching is in my blood." He said proudly. Though it was a bad thing to say. He looked to his left, "Kagome? What are you doing with that bow and arrow?.....................Ah, crap! NOT AGAIN!!!" he ran off, Kagome chasing him with a bow and arrow, and Inu Yasha running behind her, he was going to save Shio from being purified, then he was going to break the kit's nose. Miroku went running after them, wanting to become Shio's next student. Sango went after him, to stop him of course.

Shippou looked back at them from his frog-like sitting position and said, "What's wrong with me having friends that are girls? Grown-ups are weird."

ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123ABC123

^_^ Cute little chapter there.

I just read this story by my home girl, moomoo-chan. It's called "Speechless." Kagome is a mute, and Kagome's mama gets Inu Yasha to kind of be a friend for her. (Or a boyfriend. ^_~) And anyway, it's really cute. I think it's actually one of the most interesting stories I've seen on here. Read if you like cute, and humorous romances.

The next ad is for me kinda, ^_^ ;;;;. Yeah, I made this story called Sesshomaru a feudal fluffy tail, and it is soo hilarious! ^_^ It's inspired by the "Secret Diary of Legolas", so go read that story if you love humorous paradies-and Sesshomaru! ^_~