I don't own the characters of the great Tenchu series.....blah blah blah. So don't try to sue me...or call and bitch at me...or send threat letters...or try and steal any goats that I might own in my future.

Drunken Master Rikimaru....

BARTENDER: I think you've had enough...

DRUNK MAN IN MASK: Look mom,*hic* I've had enough pineapples for the *hic* way home.

BARTENDER: So, Rikimaru, why are you wearing the mask in here?

RIKIMARU: Dammit, how the *hic* hell do you know me name?

BARTENDER: Well, about half way through your 13th beer....you stealthily assassinated eight fellow drunkards with a broken beer bottle...and then proceeded to parade around the room shouting "I am Rikimaru, Ninja Master."

RIKIMARU: I asked you a question *hic* goddammit!!

BARTENDER: I just answered it.

RIKIMARU: Oh....*hic*...yeah.

Suddenly, Ayame bursts into the Bar.

AYAME: There you are.....

RIKIMARU: Damn, you *hic* one hot mother...

Ayame slaps the hell out of Rikimaru.

AYAME: Snap out of it, we need you, the new game's starting!

RIKIMARU: One more...

AYAME: No, no more!

RIKIMARU: But....

AYAME: NO!!

RIKIMARU: *hic* yes, sir...

AYAME: What?!

RIKIMARU: I mean, *hic* mom...

AYAME: You...

RIKIMARU: Ma'am!! I meant *hic* ma'am....mumble mumble tightass *hic* mumble

AYAME: What did you call me?

RIKIMARU: Look Susie....

AYAME: Ayame.

RIKIMARU: Victoria...

AYAME: Ayame.

RIKIMARU: Dammit Beelzebub, let me finish!!

Ayame knocks Rikimaru unconscious and drags him out of the bar. She then throws him into a puddle and helps him get sober again.

RIKIMARU: I can't swim!! Not in this game!!! I could in the last one, but not in this one!!

Ayame turns off the hose and helps him up.

AYAME: You better now?

RKIMARU: Yeah, I'm good.

AYAME: Really?

RIKIMARU: Yes I said, now how much are you going to give me for my camel?

AYAME: Well, I'm going to have to make due...You still have your sword right?

RIKIMARU: No, *hic* a giant wooden girl broke it, and I threw a fit and chucked it into the ocean.

AYAME: That doesn't happen 'til later in the game.

RIKIMARU: Oh….well, *hic*, I got this deadly knife and a new *hic* stealth suit.

AYAME: That's a salad fork and a bath robe.

RIKIMARU: Same thing, now...who needs *hic* killin'

AYAME: *sigh* C'mon....