Yep! Shelly here (or Ivy, or Singcraz, or Awesomous Etter, or anything else you may want to call me. I'm not picky!) Well, here's chapter two… which (sadly enough) I didn't write! Well, I know all of you will enjoy it though, since Ditey is 110% better than me! Ah, poor me (just playing). Well, Ditey, what say you?

Yup, it's Ditey, the other half (Or third? Wherefore art thou, c-chan?) of this collaboration with Ivy, aka singcraz. And we're the Awesomous Ones! Don't ask! So here's how it goes, alternating chapters with different POVs...some standard, some may surprise you. A little romance (duh), a little angst (again, duh), and a little heartbreak (double duh). Sorry, the car-race scenes a la Grease were edited out. ;) And Valentine's may have passed (Thank God. It sucked on ice) but work with us, and pretend it still is Valentine's Day (try not to scream). So here goes! The second chapter in this tantalizing and intriguing story, in Amy's POV ;)

Aww! I'm going to miss the car race! Oh well, maybe I'll add it into a different chapter.

Whoo hoo! And here… we… go!

Chapter 2

I sighed when I finally reached the comfort of my room, my mind still trailing

on The Great Gatsby and linear equations. I dropped the books to the floor,

glancing at the clock that lay on my bedside table.

Almost eleven. I exhaled deeply, somewhat expecting the long day that proceeded.

The F. Scott Fitzgerald test killed me, and where did that Chemistry pop

quiz come from? Kayla and her endless ramblings dragged me down into the depths

of our popularity status, though talk of her secret admirer had the entire school

buzzing. Those stiletto boots were going to cause my death, walking up and down

so many flights of stairs during the day..

But I let my mind relax as I eased myself into my bed, the light blue sheets

that invited sleep and the warm blanket enveloping me, the radio on my bedside

playing a soft melody. I smiled despite my exhaustion and mental fatigue. These

were the times I learned to cherish most: times alone, time to just let go. Times

I let myself loose, carefree, wild; or times I just relaxed, took note of

the tall oak tree casting shadows outside my window, or delight in "that song"

playing on the radio.

Times before any thoughts I tried to escape during the day returned to me.

Colin's arrival… Ephram's withdrawal…trying to keep the wanted balance between

the two was enough to drive me crazy.

I could never find the balance. Sometimes I'd almost stalk Colin, spend hours

riding the bus to see him in Denver, camp out in the waiting room, make collages

and scrapbooks of pictures I found of us together. I'd find a bubble gum wrapper

of his, a key chain he left at my house, and treasure it, even when we were miles

apart.

And sometimes...he was the last person I wanted to see. I felt nauseous at the

sight of him, I felt like turning the other way when his eager face came to

greet me. I would avoid him, hide out in the ballet room or the library, make

excuses why I couldn't join him after school, fake assignments or dinner parties

or obligations. I felt like shredding the pages and pages of notebook paper in

my binder consumed by words I had written, 'Colin + Amy'. Two names that had

been close to synonymous for years, now never seemed right.

Sometimes, I would admit it, there was nothing more I wanted than to run away.

To be alone, blend in with the night. I'd take delight in seeing life from

the outside, someone else walking around with Colin on their arm, someone

else making the same mistakes I did. I would laugh at their trivial matters,

and even at the monumental ones, as long as I didn't have to deal with it.

And sometimes, I found someone next to me, laughing and smiling at how envious

the world can be. My comfort, strength, the home base that keeps me from losing

my mind, and gave life something to look forward to.

It's never Colin.

I suddenly felt faint, not sure if sleep was washing over me or the sudden

recollection of the reverie. In either case, I turned on my side and shut off

the lights, not letting myself follow the train of thought. I felt as whimsical

yet misguided as Scarlet O'Hara when I find my last thought to be, "I'll think

of it all tomorrow, when I can stand it." 

-_-

The morning always comes too soon. I dreaded crawling out of bed to face the

world, waves of disappointment to remember the problems with it. Someone I

couldn't even face was perhaps the sole reason in getting up. Even if I could

never admit it.

It was officially tomorrow. Thoughts flooded my mind once consciousness reigned.

I warded them off to the best of my ability. But the barrier broke at the sound

of the doorbell, Colin standing on the porch.

He produced a large bouquet of flowers from behind his back, red roses and baby's

breath arranged in such a way enough to make a girl swoon.

"Happy Valentine's Day," he greeted, as he escorted me to the truck, smiling

and proud. I was yet to say a word, surprise and amazement taking control. He

didn't show the out-of-placeness he felt while he made conversation. My answers

were laconic. Still in disbelief.

He talked of reservations and parties, formals and socials, I could care less.

The flowers hadn't lost their red juiciness as we approached the school, hordes

of students gathering at the entrance, comparing notes and candy, chocolates

and brilliant jewelry in velvet cases.

Paige would be more excited with the bouquet than I would, I was sure of that.

I could predict her high-pitched squeals of how sweet/romantic it was. Homecoming

King and Queen would continue to reign.

I exhaled deeply. Those were Ephram's words, words that stuck with me, weeks

after it had been said. His words often did. It saddened me that I could not

remember the conversation the gang had yesterday during lunch, but I could

quote his confession on the porch during Edna's birthday party, his words

running through my head like he had told me mine were.

I ordered myself to stop it again, knowing I would compare Colin and Ephram,

again, and I was truthfully afraid of the conclusions I would make.

I comforted myself that Colin and Ephram were different, I couldn't compare them

because they weren't the same. Colin and I's relationship had a deeper bond,

not just through conversations, but of loyalty, commitment. Ephram and I's

relationship- I refused to even call it that- our friendship... forget it.

Today was our day- Colin and mine, and I would not let myself ruin it with

these thoughts.

It was hard not to think of him though, when Colin and I approached him to

tell him of the Valentine's Party we were throwing that night. To not notice

the looks he gave me in private that I hoped Colin didn't notice. To not

notice him wincing as I clung to Colin's arm, the mere words 'Valentine's

Day' playing chords with his heart.

Oh, how much I wanted to let go of Colin, to tell Ephram all these things and

concerns racing through my head, my insecurities, worries, like I used to. But

I didn't think he would be willing to consult me on the matter, what to do if

thoughts of him entered my mind more often than one could call appropriate.

It was so hard not to take a last look at him when we walked away, knowing

his eyes were on mine. So hard.

Never had crepe paper been so attractive, if I said so myself. Streamers of it

fell from the ceiling, red and pink, of course, twisted and twirled, a canopy

of color. The lights were dimmed to a muted glow, dark shadows cast across the

room. Refreshments had been set, the basics of chocolates, punch, ginger ale

made to look like white wine in their narrow-necked glasses. Soft, acoustic

music melted the air, mingling with the faint scent of lavender.

I was going for elegant and sophisticated, yet I still felt a certain makeout party vibe. But I shrugged it off, sure I

would not be partaking in any of those events with Colin. I looked over

myself once more in the mirror, the pink dress catching the light, and what I'm

sure must be signature by now, the au naturale Amy persona shining through.

I was pleased with everything and sat down in the couch, wringing my hands

for those few nerve-wrecking moments before a party started and I was alone.

They should have pre-party Zen, I decided.

The doorbell rang. I hoped it was Colin, not only for obvious reasons, but I

was certain I would strangle Kayla if she continued to talk about her

stuffed animal with a big heart that read 'Be Mine' that was mysteriously

found in her locker.

And if I spent a moment alone with Ephram… it would be the first time alone

since Colin's arrival. I didn't know if I could deal with that. And the makeout

party vibe I had felt was not very safe with him and I in the same room. I

would lose my head and power myself on hormones and passion... I had to laugh

at the idea. It would be fine. Just had to keep control, and not do anything

I'd regret.

I walked to the door to answer it, realizing how cold it must be outside. Still

praying it was anyone but him, so I didn't have to face him alone. I would even

be happy with Kayla.

But I have horrible luck.

He was standing on my porch, wearing a jacket that I'm sure would make him

very handsome if I wasn't desperately trying to avoid facing him and usher

him inside. I lost my voice, words caught in my throat. I kept telling myself, stay cool. Get him inside, make small talk until Colin, Kayla, anyone else arrives. Just stay cool.

It was hard to stay cool when thousands of thoughts crept into my mind. How a few weeks ago, this would not have been as awkward, and I would feel comfortable enough to sit next to him on the couch, and now, I could barely meet his eyes. How he was the one person that I would admit had kept me sane while Colin was gone, and it sometimes felt rare glimpses of him kept me sane while Colin was here. Through all the low tricks and stunts I pulled, he had always forgiven me. Using him, lying to him, the awful way my friends treated him, he used to still be my side.

I had pulled on stunt too many, one misguided effort that broke it. And now he was standing on my porch in thirty degree weather, probably trying to fight the urge to scream obscenities at me, while two months ago, he would have greeted me with a warm embrace. My lip quivered, thinking of something to say, and I could feel a chill work its way up my

spine.

"Ephram…" Don't look into his eyes. All hope would be lost if I did. Those

pale blue eyes that could--

He fidgeted on the porch, looking down at his feet. Trying to avoid me as

much as I was him? He looked up, catching my gaze and locking it. I couldn't

help myself. I looked into his eyes.

"I..." I started, working up my nerves, "Welcome to the party! Come in."