Starting Over
Not "Just Something That Happens"
Phyl walked past Christian and Satine's door whistling cheerily. She was in an extremely happy mood. Her tutor had cancelled on her and she was free to do whatever she wanted.
'Ohhhh.' A low moan came from the bedroom. Phyl stopped and listened. 'Ohhh.' There it was again. She thought she had imagined it.
'Hello?' She knocked lightly and stuck her head round the door. Leaning against the bed was Satine. She had put a t-shirt of Christian's on and was now sitting with her legs stretched out in front of her looking absolutely terrified. She looked up when Phyl came in. She opened her mouth to speak.
'Ohhh.' She could only let out a moan and clutch desperately at her stomach.
'Satine, what's the matter....?' Phyl trailed off when she saw her nightdress. 'I thought that it wasn't due for another three weeks.'
'It's not.' Satine said tearfully. 'This is all my fault!'
'No it's not. Did you know?'
'No. Christian is going to be so mad with me.'
'You know that's not true.' Phyl hugged her shoulders reassuringly. 'Besides we don't know if anything has happened yet. We should get the doctor in and find out the truth.'
'You're right. Thanks.' Satine managed a small smile before grimacing in pain again.
***
Gerald looked at the grandfather clock and then at the door. He sighed loudly. He expected lateness from Phyl but not from Satine. She was always on time for meals and was quiet and calm, just the way he liked people to be at the table. Sitting at the other end was Kathleen and on his right sat James and Peter and on his left was Christian. There were two spaces free on the same side for Satine and Phyl.
'Where are those girls?' He wondered out loud. 'Lilly, go and see where they are.'
'Yes, sir.' The maid curtsied and opened the door. She reached the bottom of the stairs where she collided with Phyl. 'Ah, Miss Phyl, the master was looking for you and Miss Satine.'
'Lilly, I need you to go and get the doctor for me.'
'But I have the beds to make.'
'This is much more important. Please.....it's Satine.'
'I'll go right away, Miss.' Lilly had a soft spot for Satine. Of course, she liked everyone else but there was something about Satine that she liked. Maybe it was the way Satine made sure there wasn't too much tidying to do in her bedroom or maybe the way she would sneakily help tidy the plates after dinner when Gerald wasn't looking.
***
'Where has Lilly gone?' Gerald demanded when his daughter came in late. 'Why are you late? Where is Satine?'
'Doctors. Satine. Upstairs.' She answered all three questions with one word. Everyone tried to contain their laughter. Christian was spluttering along with them when the words suddenly went into his brain.
'Why has she gone to the doctors?' He asked slowly, standing up.
'I think you'd better go upstairs.' Phyl told him gently. She didn't want to voice out Satine's problems yet. Christian flew out of the room and bounded up the stairs two at a time. He flung his bedroom door open to see Satine still leaning against the bed, grimacing in pain. She had started to bleed again and was sitting in a small pool of blood.
'Christian....' She said weakly, holding out a shaking hand. He took it and sat down next to her, putting his arm around her and placing his quivering lips on her forehead.
'Sssh. Lily's gone to get the doctor. He'll be able to stop the pain.' He didn't want to tell her everything was going to be all right because what if it wasn't? He would have lied to her and their marriage was built on trust. Satine sniffled before grimacing in pain again. Christian felt her body tense up.
***
The doctor put his stethescope back into his bag. Satine, who was now lying on the bed, stared blankly ahead. Christian looked at her before smiling weakly at the doctor.
'I'm sorry, sir.' Christian nodded and the doctor went to the door. Giving one glance back at Satine, he left. For a few seconds Christian just looked at Satine. Her lip began to quiver and the tears began to pour.
'I-I'm sorry, Christian.' She wailed.
'Hey, this isn't your fault.' He said quietly.
'Yes it is. If I didn't have all those drinks then I wouldn't be in this situation.'
'Satine, you must never blame yourself for this.' He sat down on the bed next to her. 'Unfortunately, this is just something that happens.'
'But it wasn't "just something that happens".'
'Satine...' Christian began.
'Face facts, Christian. I killed my baby, I killed my baby!' She said loudly, tears running down her face. Christian stood up numbly and walked backwards out of the door. The shock realisation had just hit him.
Phyl walked past Christian and Satine's door whistling cheerily. She was in an extremely happy mood. Her tutor had cancelled on her and she was free to do whatever she wanted.
'Ohhhh.' A low moan came from the bedroom. Phyl stopped and listened. 'Ohhh.' There it was again. She thought she had imagined it.
'Hello?' She knocked lightly and stuck her head round the door. Leaning against the bed was Satine. She had put a t-shirt of Christian's on and was now sitting with her legs stretched out in front of her looking absolutely terrified. She looked up when Phyl came in. She opened her mouth to speak.
'Ohhh.' She could only let out a moan and clutch desperately at her stomach.
'Satine, what's the matter....?' Phyl trailed off when she saw her nightdress. 'I thought that it wasn't due for another three weeks.'
'It's not.' Satine said tearfully. 'This is all my fault!'
'No it's not. Did you know?'
'No. Christian is going to be so mad with me.'
'You know that's not true.' Phyl hugged her shoulders reassuringly. 'Besides we don't know if anything has happened yet. We should get the doctor in and find out the truth.'
'You're right. Thanks.' Satine managed a small smile before grimacing in pain again.
***
Gerald looked at the grandfather clock and then at the door. He sighed loudly. He expected lateness from Phyl but not from Satine. She was always on time for meals and was quiet and calm, just the way he liked people to be at the table. Sitting at the other end was Kathleen and on his right sat James and Peter and on his left was Christian. There were two spaces free on the same side for Satine and Phyl.
'Where are those girls?' He wondered out loud. 'Lilly, go and see where they are.'
'Yes, sir.' The maid curtsied and opened the door. She reached the bottom of the stairs where she collided with Phyl. 'Ah, Miss Phyl, the master was looking for you and Miss Satine.'
'Lilly, I need you to go and get the doctor for me.'
'But I have the beds to make.'
'This is much more important. Please.....it's Satine.'
'I'll go right away, Miss.' Lilly had a soft spot for Satine. Of course, she liked everyone else but there was something about Satine that she liked. Maybe it was the way Satine made sure there wasn't too much tidying to do in her bedroom or maybe the way she would sneakily help tidy the plates after dinner when Gerald wasn't looking.
***
'Where has Lilly gone?' Gerald demanded when his daughter came in late. 'Why are you late? Where is Satine?'
'Doctors. Satine. Upstairs.' She answered all three questions with one word. Everyone tried to contain their laughter. Christian was spluttering along with them when the words suddenly went into his brain.
'Why has she gone to the doctors?' He asked slowly, standing up.
'I think you'd better go upstairs.' Phyl told him gently. She didn't want to voice out Satine's problems yet. Christian flew out of the room and bounded up the stairs two at a time. He flung his bedroom door open to see Satine still leaning against the bed, grimacing in pain. She had started to bleed again and was sitting in a small pool of blood.
'Christian....' She said weakly, holding out a shaking hand. He took it and sat down next to her, putting his arm around her and placing his quivering lips on her forehead.
'Sssh. Lily's gone to get the doctor. He'll be able to stop the pain.' He didn't want to tell her everything was going to be all right because what if it wasn't? He would have lied to her and their marriage was built on trust. Satine sniffled before grimacing in pain again. Christian felt her body tense up.
***
The doctor put his stethescope back into his bag. Satine, who was now lying on the bed, stared blankly ahead. Christian looked at her before smiling weakly at the doctor.
'I'm sorry, sir.' Christian nodded and the doctor went to the door. Giving one glance back at Satine, he left. For a few seconds Christian just looked at Satine. Her lip began to quiver and the tears began to pour.
'I-I'm sorry, Christian.' She wailed.
'Hey, this isn't your fault.' He said quietly.
'Yes it is. If I didn't have all those drinks then I wouldn't be in this situation.'
'Satine, you must never blame yourself for this.' He sat down on the bed next to her. 'Unfortunately, this is just something that happens.'
'But it wasn't "just something that happens".'
'Satine...' Christian began.
'Face facts, Christian. I killed my baby, I killed my baby!' She said loudly, tears running down her face. Christian stood up numbly and walked backwards out of the door. The shock realisation had just hit him.
