To deceive me more and more
A thousand words will give the reason why
I don't need you anymore
'A Thousand Words' by Savage Garden
When they'd walked into the woods it had been just past dusk. Dark enough for Spike to travel about outside as it was insisted he was needed. Now as Buffy walked back through the trees it was settling properly into night, the sky turning a darker blue, the half-moon shining that little bit brighter. The lack-of-light wasn't a problem, she'd been out at night almost every day for two years, even someone with no special powers would get used to it after such a long time. Being the Slayer helped though. Ducking under branches and avoiding roots, she was reminded of that night a few months ago, the last time she'd come to these woods, when she and Spike had walked back. It wasn't a sad memory, not even in the context of just having broken up with him. She remembered how happy they had been, tired but ecstatic. It wasn't the path that she remembered, it was the little things, like the smell of the leaves, and the way he'd had an arm around her middle to help her walk. Leather brushing her skin where her T-shirt peaked up. Now it was sad.
Pretty soon the woods were left behind her and Buffy was walking along the earth track that led her back into a slightly more populated Sunnydale area. She wasn't thinking about what she had to do. Blatantly not thinking about it. Not really thinking about anything, just setting her legs into motion and watching the scenery pass by. When she snapped out of her lack-of-thoughts she noted the places she'd walked to, forgetting mostly how. Residential area, high street, Revello drive. Her house.
She stared up at her dark window longingly, wishing that she could just climb up there and crawl into bed. She'd still dream though. Bad dreams. But perhaps the comforting covers would chase them from her mind, or the warmth of the blankets make everything disappear from her head so that all that would register would be primal feelings. Warmth. Safety. Comfort. She sighed and walked up the path. Buffy hadn't made it two steps before the door burst open to reveal her mother in a dressing gown that was tied tightly around her middle.
"Buffy? Where on earth have you been?" Her voice contained anger and relief at the same time.
"Mom... There's something I need to tell you."
"Are you actually going to let Buffy do this then?" Xander questioned, walking a few paces behind Giles as they made their way back to the school and the Library. Cordelia was lagging even further back, talking to her parents --or the help-- on her phone and explaining that she'd be back late again. Xander didn't feel the need to do the same.
"I'm not letting her do anything. This sounds dangerous, and life-threatening. I'm not sure she's even thought about it properly herself. But at least we've got a few days to change her mind now... and if not... we've got time to research and help her survive..."
"No pressure or anything." Xander grumbled.
"All sorted." Cordelia stated, putting her phone away as she caught up with her boyfriend, "Kinda funny that my 'staying up studying' excuse is actually true this time."
"Funny?" Xander questioned dubiously.
"You know, in the 'not' way." Cordelia reached up to rearrange her hair as she stepped out of the trees onto the dirt path that led to the road. Of all the other thousands of things that would be wrong about Cordelia Chase being seen out at night with her present company, grooming would not be one of them.
"Do we even believe this Kat girl is telling the truth?" Xander shot at the Watcher, who was now far enough ahead to warrant raised voices and angry 'shhs'.
"Xander!" Giles reprimanded, "There are still Vampires and demons around you know, just because we don't seem to be killing them anymore doesn't mean they're not out there, quite the reverse in fact." he had stopped and was now waiting for the two teenagers to catch up. Xander opened his mouth to say something but was silenced when Cordelia slapped him on the arm.
"If you're about to draw the similarities between Mulder and Giles, don't. Too many cute actors have been ruined for me that way." her head snapped around and she continued flawlessly by laying into the Librarian, "And Xander has a point, we might just be playing into some big evil plan, just because she kisses good doesn't mean she is."
"Living proof of that honey." Xander murmured, earning another slap on the arm and allowing Giles time to tame the blush on his cheeks.
"I am well aware," Giles raised his voice above the banter, ignoring his own advice, "that she may not be all that she seems. In fact I am more inclined to think that she is an emissary of dark powers, but at the moment we have reached an impasse. We have an agreement. Hopefully when our three days are up we'll have discovered if she is something to be fought with, or against."
"There was a hint in there somewhere." Cordelia noted and started the group walking again as Xander agreed with a nod. Giles followed, behind them this time, finding shepherding an easier way to keep movement fast.
Buffy traced the rim of her mug with concentration, moisture from the hot drink collecting on her finger ever-so-slightly in a nicely distracting way. She wasn't thirsty, but as her mother bustled about the kitchen and, subsequently, ordered her around as well, she found it was a nice delay for the inevitable. Joyce was doing the same, arranging things on countertops and straightening shelves out before she asked that question which she was sure was going to end up being answered by those guilty words 'I'm pregnant' or 'I'm flunking out of school' or 'I'm a drug addict'. She didn't want to think those things about her daughter, wouldn't believe for a second that any of them could be true, but if it wasn't any of those options, what else was there?
"You were baking?" Buffy asked, taking in the plastic bowl filled with flour and margarine, and the scales begging to measure out sugar and chocolate chips from open packages.
"Oh. Yes." Joyce was relieved that her daughter had pointed her in the way of another distraction. She'd gotten angrier and angrier as the time had gotten later and later, so she'd tried to occupy herself with something. The ingredients that before had been a furious escape, now turned into a welcome vent for her anger. Now that her daughter wanted to talk, and she didn't have to drum information out of her, Joyce found herself getting strangely calm, and the rage filtering away to leave only adrenaline-imposed shaky anticipation. As she laid her hands back onto the familiar boxes and jars she continued, "I needed something to do while was up waiting."
"Chocolate-chip cookies?" Buffy queried, dodging the inevitable question, "We used to make those together." she offered a smile to invite her mother to think back to the days when dough would stick in her child's hair, and flour would ruin her dress, and cookies would burn as a young Buffy was coaxed out of a warm bath.
"We used to do a lot of things together." Joyce commented without inflexion, letting the clunk of the scales tell her when she had too much sugar. Buffy's finger slipped over the side of her mug and into the scalding liquid. She only noticed enough to draw it out, all attention fixed on her mother.
"Mom... You might want to sit down while I tell you--"
"I'm fine." Joyce said briskly, "Just... hit me." adding the last two words in a way she usually would around Buffy's friends, trying to be 'cool-mom'. The Slayer only wished she could roll her eyes now and whine at her mother, but somehow it really wasn't the time.
"Okay. Mom." she paused between each word as her brain worked overtime on how to phrase it, what to say first, explain first, "I'm the Slayer." Buffy watched her mother's hands slow for a fraction of a second before resuming their normal pace. This was resolved-mom mode, where she had made up her mind she would be unflappable. Would it still be in place by the end of the conversation?
"Is that some kind of... street name?" Joyce asked calmly.
"No, mom, its.... Its kind of a job description." deep breath, "You see... Vampires are real. And in Sunnydale. Well, actually all over the world, but Sunnydale has a higher than usual population -- not that they did a census or anything... Its just that there's this Hellmouth, which is exactly as it sounds, and it kinda attracts them, because -- you know -- evil. And I'm the Slayer, which means I have to kill them. The Vampires, that is. Well, demons too, if I... come across any..." Buffy reached out and tipped half of the drink into her mouth at once. Stop talking. Her mother was glaring at her, calming cookery no longer helping.
"I suppose you think this is funny, Buffy. But it really isn't. If you didn't want to tell me where you were then... I'd have still dragged it out of you... but you didn't need to make fun of me. Was this one of your friend's ideas? William's? I can't believe you would come up with something so... I can't believe that of you Buffy."
"Mom! Its true!" Buffy protested, half-choking on a mouthful of hot-chocolate and indignation.
"Buffy! Go to bed now!" Joyce pointed to the kitchen doorway with a hand covered in margarine, "We'll talk about this tomorrow when you're in a more sensible mood."
"Its real mom!"
"Go. To. Bed." her mother ordered, moving that way herself as if taking her own advice. Buffy stared for a millisecond before darting forward and catching her mom's arm.
"Please, mom, you have to listen to me. You have to." there was something just so pathetic in the way that she said it that caused Joyce to pause.
"Oh... Buffy..." she sighed, "I don't like being angry with you. You're my daughter and I love you, if you tell me the truth then of course I'll listen... and help you out."
"It was the truth mom..."
"You're obviously over-tired." Joyce snapped, reversing her daughter's grip until she was holding the teenager's wrist and pulling her towards the staircase, "Get some sleep, we'll talk about this in the morning."
"No." Buffy had let herself be pulled as far as the bottom step, but no further. She yanked herself free of her mother's hand, "I didn't want to do this mom, but if you don't believe me, I'll prove it to you."
"Honey..." Joyce was feeling the anger leaving her again, this time being replaced by worry, "Vampires, demons, these things are not real."
"I can show you mom."
Joyce paused. For the smallest of small seconds she felt that childlike willingness bubble up inside her. A need to believe that stretched from closet-monsters to Santa in the blink of an eye. It was smothered quickly of course. The things her daughter was describing were not real. So perhaps she was having some sort of breakdown, or perhaps this was a practical joke she was playing. Or someone was playing on her. Joyce had never thought of Buffy as gullible but... Would it be so bad to indulge her this one time. If she could see what her daughter was describing as Vampires, maybe she could point out how they weren't. Explain the truth to her child as she always tried to do.
"Let me get dressed." she said finally, the defeat in her tone audible to even herself, "And put on some warmer clothes yourself," she added as an afterthought, "you could freeze to death."
"We'll be lucky if the only thing that tries to kill us tonight is the weather." Buffy muttered, but only when her mother was out of earshot.
Willow pressed her face into his shirt. It was soft against her skin, material pressing against her eyelids and reminding her they were closed and not just covered, fabric softener smell too strong showing he hadn't quite gotten the hang of the washing machine yet, texture slightly rough as he moved around, reminding her he was awake. He'd speak soon.
It was one of the things about her boyfriend that she treasured the most. The fact that when he spoke, it was just to her. His friends, her friends, wouldn't believe he could talk for so long, but they'd often spent nights sitting there and doing just that. Wrapped in each others arms, or trying to be seriously platonic -- simply touching each other's hair, caressing with comforting looks. They'd kiss and the world wouldn't stop, it'd keep right on going, pulling them with it so they didn't need to open their eyes. Except sometimes one forgot what the other looked like, and eyes would open, smiles would bloom. Words would spill out into the silence. He'd talk soon.
His hand was on her back, tracing little circles with his index finger against the cloth. She didn't want him to stop, but at the same time she wanted to move -- wriggle against his hand, breath a soft laugh against his ear. The two couldn't happen together. As soon as she moved he would, and the moment would be broken in place of a new one. She could speak first, emit words out into the breath-filled void. But she didn't want to be the one to smash something, to open eyes and see where time had brought them now. Even the slightest whisper might break the spell they were under. He'd make a sound soon.
"You think we should try again?" she asked, her patience finally wearing out as if it'd never been there. She raised her head from his chest to catch each movement of his face as he answered. He smiled at her sweetly, but just as she guessed his hand moved from her back, stolen away by a stretch that also broke their locked gaze with yawn-induced squinting.
"Try what again?" he questioned softly, arching an eyebrow at her and provoking a giggle. He wasn't one for innuendo much, but when he used it she always understood the double entendre, much more than when anyone else did.
"The spell of course, silly..." she slapped his chest playfully, eliciting a grunt from him as he pretended to be in pain. She didn't miss his slight frown amongst all the play-acting, or the way he avoided the question with tickling fingers, but suddenly it was hard to be angry. Or to press the subject. She laughed loudly inside the confines of his room, lying on his bed while his hands sought out tender spots on her body to worry at until she giggled and begged for him to stop. Though she didn't mean it.
"Not now..." he spoke into the once-again settling silence, the laughter dissolving in the air. She turned around on the twisted bedcovers, made knotted by the games, and got comfortable once again lying up against his body. Calming her breath she draped one arm over his middle and set her head somewhere below his arm so that if she strained to hear very hard his heart would thump in her ear.
"You're tired?" she asked. It sounded more like a statement than a question, and even more like an answer. As if she'd skipped a few questions along and found that this would be his excuse. Cut through all the procrastination at the start to leave more time at the end for other things.
"Yep." he agreed, understanding. His lazy hand fell back onto her, this time running fingers through her hair and touching the tips as if he wished to grow his own hair as long. Or as if he was memorising each strand. Would he mourn if she had it cut again? What a stupid question. It was only hair. He'd just have to explore it all over again, he'd like that.
Willow closed her eyes again against his shirt and it felt as if they'd just stepped back to time before and the last few seconds hadn't happened. Perhaps they hadn't and she had only thought about asking him to try again. Maybe in a few minutes she would ask and get the same response. Maybe it was worth looking like a fool just for that. Then again perhaps she should wait and let him have a turn this time, she kept on skipping ahead on the board and leaving him behind, let him have a roll of the dice. Step up to bat. And other euphemisms. She let herself relax fully against him to wait, content with her decision . He'd speak soon.
"You tellin' me you don't know where your own boyfriend lives?"
"For the last time he is not my boyfriend." Buffy yelled, finally managing to cause a nervous demon at the end of the bar to spill his drink.
"I've heard the talk." Willy said confidently, then off her glare and closed fist amended, "But whatever he is or isn't to you, Slayer, you two do seem to have been a little bit pally last few months. So how come you don't know where he dodges the sun at?"
"Look, Willy, I'm not trying to trick you into... whatever you think I'm going to trick you into. I just need to know where he is."
"How do I know ol' William the Bloody won't be coming in here tomorrow ready to knockabout the guy who blew the whistle on his digs to the Slayer?"
"If I'm going there to kill him he won't be around tomorrow morning, if I'm not then he won't be angry to see me. Hell, you know Spike, he probably won't be bothered either way."
"Slayer, please," Willy still looked uncertain, untrusting. The demons around the bar were all paying attention to the conversation in their own way. All waiting to see how easily the barkeeper would sell out their safety to the Slayer, "I can't tell you." he found his head snapping backwards a second later and blood beginning to drip down onto his bar.
"Now can you tell me?"
"Slayer, I--" another punch.
"How about now?"
"Its Angelus's old mansion, you know the one?" Willy spluttered through a mouth full of blood. He'd had worse injuries, but he still never got used to the pain.
"I... Yes." Buffy tried squinting at the bartender, overcompensating for how wide her eyes must have grown when he'd revealed her ex's abode. How could she have gone out with him so long and not known? How could he have gone out with her so long and not known it would bother her? "Thanks for the info Willy."
"Always a pleasure." he coughed, doubling over the counter. She turned and stalked out of the bar, welcoming the slightly-less-than-rank smell of its outside to the putrid smell of its inside as she walked back to the locked car where her mother was waiting with strange patience.
"You didn't say it was a poem!" Xander whined, staring down at the open book in front of him, "No way can I get poetry..."
"Epic poem." Giles corrected defensively, eyes quickly scanning page after page, "Its in relatively small Cantos, even you should be able to manage one... I wish to God we had more than a work of fiction to collect information from."
"Non-fiction now." Xander pointed out, leaning into his book as if hoping getting closer would make the rhyme sensible.
"'With the voice of an angel but in her own language' -- Giles, what are we looking for here?" Cordelia demanded, thumping her book back down on the table.
"Anything that will help--"
"How can we tell what will help? Its just a long boring story, can't you give us the Cliff's Notes and then we'll work from there. At least tell us the questions that need to be answered."
"Like?"
"...How long she'll be gone?" Cordelia prompted. Xander closed his book slowly before laying his head on top of it, noticing his girlfriend questioned, "What are you doing?"
"Despairing." he answered, "Buffy has to go through a portal to hell and her best chance at the moment is the work of Cordelia Chase."
"I--" Cordelia began to speak with outrage but found herself cut off by Giles.
"This is hardly time for remarks like that. Cordelia is right. If I hadn't been so distracted, I would have taken this route all along." He too put his book down and the teenagers relaxed back into their chairs as they observed the Watcher changing into lecture-mode, "The story goes like this, Dante is walking through a forest and attacked by wild animals, he manages to escape and meet with Virgil. Virgil was a writer that Dante greatly respected, and dead at the time of Dante's writing of the epic--"
"Giles, small version." Xander reminded.
"Yes, well. Virgil proceeds to guide Dante through limbo and the nine circles of hell, then up through purgatory and into paradise."
"See! Nine circles! That's one thing we know now we didn't know before." Cordelia realised she was getting excited, and so stopped, calming her persona, "We need Willow, getting enthusiastic about knowledge is her job."
"I think we're all forgetting that we still don't know whether this is a trap or not. This woman could have read this book -- though I don't see why she'd want to -- and decided it'd be a perfect substantial lie to get the Slayer to step into a portal."
"You forget, she wants Spike."
"And that's fine we me, let her have him, but Buffy won't let him go." Xander shrugged.
"Well gee, if you wanted to know more about me, you shoulda just asked." Kat piped up from behind the stacks before moving into view. The other three occupants of the Library stared up at her expectantly and she sighed, "Here's a tip for you -- ever get the power to teleport, don't use it all the time, the shock factor wears out.... Right, what's the first question?"
"Spike!" she called, the name reverberating around the cavernous ceiling. She didn't bother calling a second time, she knew he'd heard her. And a few moments later movement at the top of the staircase confirmed that. He stepped out into the moonlight, hair ruffled and eyes half closed as if she'd just woken him from sleep. His gaze didn't meet hers immediately, instead he ran a hand over his hair and stretched a few tired muscles. He didn't even acknowledge that he knew they were here, but his very presence was enough to show that he did. Stepping further into the light she could see he was wearing a pair of jeans and nothing else, bare chest flashing the world. When he finally looked up he grinned, instead of looking embarrassed he stuck his chest out a little more. Buffy immediately looked away. Spike's eyes flickered to the person beside the Slayer, and grin growing a little, said,
"Buffy, Joyce, to what do I owe this honour?"
"Show us your bumpies." Buffy demanded, wanting to get this meeting over as soon as possible. Spike raised a leering eyebrow before starting a slow decent of the stairs, each step bringing him unbearably closer. When he was halfway down it was as if he couldn't hold in his retort a moment longer,
"Flashing was never really my style luv."
"Is this where you live, William?" Joyce asked nervously. The man who usually behaved so politely around her seemed different. What kind of parent would let their child stay in a place like this? Perhaps it wasn't up to them. She'd always assumed he was around Buffy's age, but now she looked at him he did look a little older. How hadn't she seen that the first time round? Didn't see, or didn't want to see? No, she was just letting her daughter's words frighten her now. Maybe her boyfriend was older that she'd suspected, but that was all.
"Yes." Spike answered, eyes never leaving Buffy, "It might not look like much, but it holds some very special memories for me does this place." he finally finished walking down the staircase, reaching the bottom he stalked towards the two women, stopping a couple of feet away. If the tiles bothered his bare feet he didn't say.
Buffy felt her teeth grinding together and loosened her jaw. She wasn't going to let him upset her. So what if he enjoyed staying in a place where he fucked his ex when he was going out with someone else. She'd broke up with him, after all. She'd thought this was going to be the easiest place to bring her mother to experience Vamp-ness without actually getting into a fight. But punching Spike was probably going to be the quickest way to get him into game face. Now he knew what she wanted, he'd make her work for it.
The Slayer's hand impacted with Spike's face just as it had begun to grow that disgusting smirk he liked to ware. There was satisfactory smack and some annoyed British exclamations as he stumbled back and clutched at his face. Had she broken his nose? She hadn't meant to hit that hard... But maybe she was a little angry. So often she'd wondered about what other agenda Spike might have about dating her. To kill her. To fuck her. To hurt her. But eventually, usually when she saw him, those worries would be washed away and she'd believe that he wanted to be with her, just because she was her. Now with this evidence, maybe it was all about causing her pain.
"Buffy!" her mother's shocked voice was louder that Spike's grumbling, which only caused him to increase in volume.
"Bloody hell woman!" Spike yelped loudly, "You only had to ask nicely and I'd have shown you. No need to resort to violence."
"There is so many ways in which that is funny Spike, that believe me I'll be laughing later, but for now -- just show, and we'll leave."
"Never had such an attractive offer." Spike muttered, but nevertheless he pulled his hands away from his face to show of the lack-of human mask. Joyce simply stared, after a long while Spike seemed to get bored of being the freak-show and spoke to Buffy again, "So you finally decided to tell your mum, huh?"
"This is some kind of..." Joyce's voice trailed off as she stared at Spike's face.
"Mom?" Buffy touched her mother's arm, tone concerned.
"It was true?" Joyce questioned, "Vampire's are... real?"
Spike crossed his arms over his chest and set up a slouching pose to show he was thoroughly bored by the whole thing. If Buffy'd still been his girlfriend he might have at least pretended to care, but now he worked overtime to show that things would be different. Perhaps she'd forgotten how nasty he could be. She was half-turned away from him, tending to her mother, and it would be so easy for him to slip in and bite her neck.
Buffy wanted to yell at Spike to 'go away' but she needed to deal with her mom first. She rubbed the older woman's upper-arm to try and massage the shock and fear from her features. Buffy wanted to concentrate on her task, but every now-and-then her gaze flickered back to the Vampire. She told herself she was doing the Slayer-thing, keeping an eye on her prey and everything. But she wasn't so much as watching for movement as... checking him out. It wasn't as if she'd never seen him shirtless before, but that had been when some rough demon-play had led to ripped clothes. And any nudity had been peppered by blood and curses. But now... he's dead... with his hair all mussed... and evil... well-defined muscles...
"Buffy... Why did you never tell me before?" Joyce's voice was weak. She didn't want to be scared, so shocked seemed the best way to go. Parents weren't allowed to be scared in front of their children, it was in the rule-book or something.
"I... didn't want you to get involved mom... Might have put you in danger without meaning to... I didn't like lying to you..." Buffy broke gaze with her mother, looking down at the floor, "... Sometimes it was just so hard, and I wanted to come home and crawl into your arms. Tell you everything and make you sort it out like you always used to do. But..." You couldn't make it better this time. "...There wasn't much you could have done and I..." Didn't want my ideal of an infallible mother to be shattered, "...didn't want you to get hurt trying. Mom...." I needed so badly to believe that if things fell to their worst I could run to you and you'd save me, "... I love you..." Just like you've always saved me, "... I couldn't loose you..." Just like you can't save me, "... I was protecting you..." Just like I save you.
"Buffy... Honey.." Joyce reached out and wiped a tear from her daughter's face. Where had they come from? Buffy looked up and pleaded bittersweet with her mother 'don't lie to me now', "...You're not wrong, I probably couldn't have helped you against... All of this. But you could have, should have, still told me. I would have tried my hardest to see you safe."
And there it was. No more promises. No more final plan. No more last hope that this was just a dream. A nightmare that her mother would pull her from and comfort her until dawn. Her mother was human, like the thousands of other pulsing, swearing, sweaty people that she saved every night. She couldn't make the world a better place -- like she made Buffy feel it could be. So it truly was the Slayer. Fighting and dying. Protecting and sacrificing. Alone.
"Are we all done now?" Spike asked, pissed at having to hang around, "The weepy-session was great and all, but some of us have things to do that don't make other people fall asleep just listening to.."
Buffy turned a tired face to Spike. She was out of ogle mode and into kick-his-annoying-British-ass mode. So what if his jeans road extremely low on his hips, and his bellybutton was... nefarious! Evil! And also... a danger to the world. Stuff like that didn't stop her from doing her job. Or at least the fun, witty, repartee part of her job.
"Shut up, Spike."
"Oh, you wound me." he pressed a hand to his chest just about where his heart doesn't-beat.
"Not yet, but I will."
"Aren't we past the idle-threats part of the banter yet?"
"You tell me Spikey, you're the one who's all 'see you on Saturday', leer leer, and yet I'm still not dead."
"If it was half as easy to get you to fight as it is to get you to cry, I'd have no problem."
"Seriously Spike, half-a-year of watching me fight and you still haven't got it yet? Someone better send back their 'how to be Angelus' fun-pack, because it obviously didn't work."
"What makes you think I've ever wanted to be like that poof?"
"I dunno, the hair-gel was a bit of a tip-off." she gestured to the slowly curling locks upon his head. All the while moving in front of her mother in case things got violent.
"Buffy." the one word, name, was said with a sudden seriousness, as if he wasn't in the mood to play anymore, "Whatever issues you have with your 'sob' Angel, you might want to stop projecting them onto every guy you meet."
"You're not a guy, you're a Vampire." the Slayer pointed out smugly.
"And so was he. You might not be able to deal with the fact that I want... wanted to be with you for you. But that is not even half as painful as the fact that you wanted to be with me for him. At least I wasn't using you as a substitute."
"A...For Dru? Crazy-Mrs-Rochester-Lady? You can hardly blame our perspectives for being different. I am so far above your last girlfriend that she's a little SimCity-person, but you're no comparison to Angel. Can you blame me for wanting more?"
"More than a guy that lo--"
"Is this the older guy from college? Was he a Vampire too?" Joyce butted in, looking questioningly at her daughter.
"Yes, mom." Buffy replied, glaring at Spike as she said it, "Angel was a Vampire."
"But he was good, like William?"
"No!" the couple both screamed at once.
"Sp-Willaim is not good, mom, he's evil. Which is why we should be leaving now."
"Yeah, its dangerous here." Spike agreed.
"Uh, could you go on ahead mom... I just want so say something to William... in private..." she was back to being the daughter again, prompting the embarrassing mother out of the room.
"All right honey, if you think its safe, I'll be waiting in the car." then after a pause, "With the doors locked." she walked out the way they'd both come in, tracing back passages with the hope she was remembering correctly.
Once her mother was gone Buffy sighed. No longer angry she stepped closer to Spike, who shook back on the human mask as if he was hiding.
"I didn't mean to..."
"Save it."
"..hurt you." Buffy soldiered on.
"Oh please, are you so much of a masochist you want more? I was only in it to... cause you pain. And to enjoy doin' it. And maybe get a shag out of it an' all. There were no saccharine feelings, you're right, I'm not your darling Angel. So get out. Stay out. And leave me alone." he turned and began walking back up the stairs. What was wrong with him? Why wasn't he killing her right now and drinking her blood?
"I--"
"I said GET LOST!" he yelled, not bothering to turn around but picking up the pace so that he was at the top of the steps and back into the shadows in a few seconds.
"...Fine, but I'll be dragging your lazy ass out of bed if the apocalypse comes a-callin'"
"How do we know you're telling the truth?" Xander asked straight away.
"Read." Kat commanded, pointing at the books before them, "You'll see I'm telling the truth."
"There isn't any mention of you in these." Giles stated.
"Oh, what do you guy's want, my actual name? 'Cause you're so not going to get it. But think about who plays my role... In the story..." she prompted.
"Uh... Virgil... he was the other guy you mentioned, right Giles?" Cordelia resented being made to feel that she had to contribute, but Kat's pointing fingers were making her nervous.
"No, not the poet. Jeez, what, did you give these kids the 'ten-word' run down of the plot? Think harder."
"You're not Beatrice?" Giles asked, frowning.
"B-I-N-G-O, and Bingo was his name-o. Of course Beatrice."
"Who?" Cordelia questioned, joining the frown-club.
"She was a... messenger... who prompted Dante to go on his quest." Giles explained, dumbing it down as he went.
"So you've done your research, big whup, still doesn't mean you're telling the truth." Xander pursued his point.
"You people are just so jaded, aren't you?" Kat placed a hand on her hip, her mouth quirking up at the side as if she found them all very amusing.
"We've seen that she has powers, Xander... Perhaps we're just supposed to believe." Giles sighed, "Haven't you got anything more substantial to show us?"
"You want proof? That I can't give you. You can help, or not, save the world, or not. Free will is something God gave to mankind. So is guilt. Which is something you'll be feeling when the world is ending and you could have stopped it."
"We should let Buffy decide. However much we want to protect her... its up to her in the end." Giles said slowly
"Right! Good! Nice point! Any more questions?" Kat felt a grin spreading over her face, "You do know the relevance of the other characters, don't you?"
"What is going on?"
"What do you mean mom?" Buffy shut the car door slowly and settled back down in her seat.
"William, he's never been that rude before."
"He's... we're not going out anymore, mom."
"Oh. But he's still a Vampire?"
"Yes, mom, I just... You just saw!"
"...Right..."
"Can we just go home mom, I'm kinda tired."
"Its late." Joyce stated in a way Buffy was sure she wouldn't have said a few hours before. Able to slay Vamps ergo able to stay out late? Perhaps there were perks to the job. Buffy rubbed forearms to try and smooth down the goose bumps from the cold night air. After the car failed to kick into motion she glanced over at her mother questioningly.
"Buffy, why did you choose to tell me now?"
"Mom..."
"Please Buffy.."
"There's.." she sighed, "...something about to happen, and I thought it would be best for me to tell you in case I..."
"..get hurt?"
"Die."
"Oh God, Buffy, you can't do this job... Not if things are that serious. Get someone else to..."
"Save the world? There is only me, mom. I know its hard for you to understand, but..."
"No! Buffy, I've been calm about this, I've listened and believed. You were right, the world is different. There are things out there that I never even dreamt of. I accept that. But its not fair to have you fight them."
"Ain't that the truth." Buffy agreed, "But I have to... Its like the ultimate high-risk job, I know, but I save people's lives, mom. I... give them hope."
"That shouldn't be your job! You're only seventeen."
"I've changed my mind."
"What?"
"I don't want to go home just yet."
"Well, you've.."
"Slayer business mom... There are some things I need to check."
"Buffy, I can't--"
"I'll give you directions or you can let me out and I'll walk. I'm sorry, but I'm getting to the end of my tether."
"I want to be involved in this, Buffy."
"You can be. You can research and..." Buffy's eyes widened as she remembered a job that would be perfect for her mother, "...you can call someone!" off her mother's sceptical look she grinned, "No, this person can answer all your questions, and you can be helping me in the process."
"Okay, what's the number?"
"Okay guys, what's the what?--" Buffy asked cheerfully as she walked into the Library. Her expression turned sour when she took in the full group and her eyes fell on Kat, "--And why the hell is she here?"
"Just here to help like everyone else, Miss Bottle-Blonde." Kat replied with a smile. She had been constantly hovering happily around the slumped others and offering much needed, but somehow-annoying, advice since she'd arrived.
"Great." Buffy promptly blocked her out, turning her attention to Giles, "What have we found out?"
"Well, Katharos has been very helpful, but I'm sorry to say that we've not found much out about this dimension that you're planning on going to. Its risky Buffy, and very--"
"I've already decided to go, skip the 'its so foolhardy I'm taking off my glasses' speech and help me survive." Buffy drew her lips together as Giles sighed and stood up. Sure-enough the glasses came off and the handkerchief out.
"We have got one piece of information that you might... Need to sit down to hear." he admitted finally.
"How shocking could it be?"
"Its not that..." glasses back on, faint smile, "...its just a rather long explanation."
"Oh." Buffy yanked a chair out from beneath the Library table with much clattering and sat down. Cordelia appeared to be dozing off next to her, head resting on a frozen Xander's shoulder who seemed terrified of moving. Giles sat back down, leaving Kat to float around in the background like a ghost.
"Well... The man, Dante, that wrote about going into this hell dimension, had a guide called Virgil. He resided in one of the circles of hell, and was to take Dante through the others. Many times Dante cannot gain access to places with Virgil's help, and vice versa. Virgil is turned away from many places until it is seen that Dante is with him."
"Uh huh." Buffy felt herself relaxing into the chair.
"If we look at the character's modern day counterparts its clear that you, Buffy, would play the role of Dante. A pure-living soul moving through hell. But that leaves one place needing to be filled. Without your Virgil you might not be able even enter this place safely."
"Why can't ol' Kat go with me? Or someone else?"
"I'm touched you'd think of me. But I've already got a role to fill, honey."
"None of us here would fit the requirements to play Virgil." Giles leant forward, trying to make his Slayer understand what he was saying, "Virgil was the dark to Dante's light. He was dead and impure. Able to guide, do, and understand the hellish place better than Dante because he was willing to inflict pain. And because he had already seen so much himself."
"So you're saying...." Buffy felt her voice trailing off. She knew where this was heading already. Kat was grinning gleefully behind Giles, practically dancing on the spot as she waiting for the words to be uttered.
"We need Spike." Giles confirmed.
Buffy sighed.
"Why is someone always saying that?"
(Author's Note: Appologies would seem a bit futile, but I am sorry that this chapter is so late. Exams, stress, you get the picture. But -- on the bright side -- yay, reviews! Thanks everyone who reviewed the last chapter. Hope you like this one.)
