Fool for Love

By

Javakamp
Chapter 16: Mall Rants

Lorelai walked out of the restaurant, and into the Briar Forest Mall, holding hands with Colin. Colin sighed and said, "I can't believe I ate so much. You know if I keep hanging around with you I'm gonna weigh 400 pounds."

Lorelai stopped and pulled on Colin's hand and pulling him into an embrace. "That's not all bad." She gave him a quick kiss on the lips, and then said, "Then there'd be so much more of you to love."

Colin smiled at her and asked, "You'd still love me if I was 400 pounds of flab and blubber, with a gut out to here, thighs as big as your waist, and double chins down to here?"

Lorelai frowned and replied, "No way, that's just way to gross. I could never love someone like that."

"You wouldn't?"

"Huh-uh. I might be able to like you, but that would be it."

Colin kissed her and said, "Well let's not let that happen."

Lorelai started to reply, but a nearby shop caught her attention, causing her to cry, "Cookies!" Lorelai removed her arms from around Colin's waist, grabbed his hand and started to pull him across the mall. "Cookies, Cookies."

"Lorelai, you just ate a huge dinner."

"That's right."

"And not only did you have a huge desert, you ate half of mine."

"Uh-huh."

"And in a few minutes we'll be going to a movie, where you'll want to get popcorn, goobers, and probably those little cookie doe candies, too."

"Oh, don't forget the red vines."

"My point is, how could you possibly want cookies?"

"That's just part of the mystery that is me."

There was only one other person at the cookie counter, so in a moment, they were walking away from the counter, with a box of cookies. After walking a short distance, they stopped, and Lorelai said, "Here, open your mouth."

"What for?"

"If I tell you it will spoil the surprise."

Relenting Colin opened his mouth, and Lorelai promptly stuck a cookie in, "There, that's for sharing your desert.

Lorelai didn't hear Colin's response, because she thought she heard her name being called out. She looked around, but saw no one. Shrugging she started to say to something to Colin.

"Lorelai!"

She heard it again, "She looked at Colin and said, "You know, that almost sounds like…"

"Lorelai!"

Lorelai's expression fell as realization hit her. "My mother."

Lorelai's fears were confirmed when she turned and saw Emily Gilmore approaching them at a brisk walk. Quickly Lorelai considered making a break for it, but she resigned herself to her fate. "Mom, hi. How are you?"

"I'm fine, Lorelai. Thank you."

"That's great, mom."

"What are you doing here?" Emily asked.

"We're just out for dinner and a movie."

"We?" Emily asked, casting a glance at Colin.

Lorelai followed her glance. Realizing there was no way she could avoid introducing Colin and her mother, she sighed and said, "Oh that's right, you two haven't met. Mom, this is Colin Fletcher. Colin, this is my mom, Emily Gilmore."

Emily smiled, held out her hand, and said, "Nice to meet you Mr. Fletcher."

Colin turned on his hundred-watt smile, took Emily's hand, and said, "Mrs. Gilmore, its' so nice to finally meet you. Lorelai has told me so much about you."

Emily glanced suspiciously at Lorelai, and then said, "Yes, I'm sure she has."

"Yes, and I can tell from the way that she speaks of you, that she's very fond of you, and your husband."

Surprised, Emily looked at Lorelai and said, "That's very generous of you Lorelai. Well, it nice to finally meet you Mr. Fletcher. Lorelai has told us so much about you. I must say that you have been a major topic of discussion the last few weeks."

Colin smiled, and said, "Well that's nice to know, and please call me Colin."

Dumbstruck, Lorelai watched for the next few moments as these two people lied to each other about how much she had spoken about them. She almost didn't catch it when Colin said, "We're on our way to see a movie, Mrs. Gilmore. Would you care to join us?"

Panic shoot through Lorelai, at Colin's offer, but before she could think of something to say to prevent it, her mother saved her saying, "That's very nice of you Colin, but I'm afraid, I can't"

"Oh, well, maybe some other time."

"That'd be nice. " She glanced at her watch, and then said, "I need to get going, but if you have a moment, I'd like to speak to you Lorelai."

"What? Sure." She turned to Colin and said, "Excuse us just a moment." She followed her mother a short ways out of earshot of Colin.

Once they were alone, Emily said, "Is this the man you've been seeing these last few weeks?"

Lorelai sighed and replied, "Yes it is. So go ahead, get it over with. Tell me what a how terrible he is. Then I can get back to my date."

Emily glanced at Colin who was leaning on a rail looking down at the people on the lower level of the mall. She looked back at Lorelai and said, ""He seems like a very nice man."

"Wow, from you that's almost a raving recommendation."

Emily shook her head. "I said he 'seems' nice."

Lorelai narrowed her eyes in confusion at her mother. "I know, I heard you. Thank you."

Emily glanced again at Colin, then leaned closer, and said, "He's too nice. It is all some kind of act."

When Lorelai stared back at her in disbelief, Emily continued, "I am an excellent judge of people, and I tell you that man is hiding something."

Finding her voice, Lorelai asked, "Have you been talking to Rory?"

"Rory, what about Rory?"

"Never mind. I can't believe that you spoke with the man for less that two minutes, and you already think that he has some big dark secret."

Emily started to respond, but Lorelai cut her off, "You know, I really don't want to do this now. I want to spend time with my date. So I'm just going to say good-bye, mom. I'll see you Friday. Then you can spend all night telling me what horrible taste I have in men, Okay?"

Emily started to protest, but again Lorelai stopped her, "Mom, please?"

Not desiring to make a scene in a crowded shopping mall, Emily nodded and said, "Fine. I'll see you on Friday."

Once they had completed their goodbyes, Lorelai briskly walked over to where Colin stood, and grabbed his hand. "Come on, let's go," Lorelai said as she started to pull him through the mall.

Caught off guard, Colin stumbled slightly, but was quickly keeping pace with Lorelai's long strides. He looked around and asked, "Where's your mother?"

"She had to leave."

"Oh, Okay." Noting their direction, Colin said, "We're going the wrong way. The theater's the other way."

Without breaking stride, Lorelai said, "I don't want to go to the movies. I want to get a drink."