Chapter 23: Maybe, just Maybe

"What?" Jason held up his hand with his eyes as wide as golf balls, shaking it on his every word as he tried to understand. "You….." He snorted. "I can't even say it. . . God," he paced a short distance down the hallway. He kept mumbling to himself, sometimes his voice squeaking an octave higher.

Brenda froze, watching Jason continue his own conversation with himself. Surprising even herself, she began to laugh thunderously. Jason halted in his tracks, looking at Brenda as if she was insane. Tears streamed down Brenda's face silently as a result of her guffawing.

"Is this supposed to be funny?" Jason asked, gaping at her. "Because I personally see no humor in this situation."

"No, it's not funny," Brenda forced herself to stop laughing, but she still giggled. "It's just, it sounds so stupid when I say it aloud."

"So you were kidding?"

"No. It's just, you learned this just as soon as I did." Brenda smiled at him, no longer laughing.

"You stopped laughing," Jason observed stupidly.

"It's not so funny anymore," Brenda whispered, taking a large step closer to him. She was close enough to him to hear his breathing.

"Jason," she said mellifluously. "You don't have to say anything back. I just. . ."

"Just what?"

She looked up into the eyes, feeling lightheaded and dizzy.

"Just this."

She leaned in closer to Jason, and she felt their lips meet for a third time. But this time, Jason pulled away immediately. His eyes hardened as much as he could make them, and he looked at Brenda squarely.

"Stop it," he ordered. "You really are screwing my life. You were just a job Brenda. We didn't marry each other because we loved each other, and those feelings were never part of the deal. And because of you, I may never have Courtney again." He paused. "I thought you loved Jax, not me."

She couldn't look at him. There was a lump in her throat, and she wished she wasn't here. She wished she hadn't done anything.

"We just had that one night. That one night is over, for good."

A door opened to their right, and Jason looked down at the floor, grimacing.

"What's going on here?" Sonny asked. "Jason?"

Jason didn't answer; he only stared guiltily at the floor. Behind Sonny, Carly emerged, and she looked displeased at Jason and Brenda.

"Brenda was just leaving," Jason mumbled.

"I thought she already had all her things," Sonny said. Brenda sighed. She hated being talked about like she wasn't in the room.

"I just forgot something," Brenda lied, deciding to go along with Jason's excuse. "But I am going to leave now. Bye."

She pushed past Jason to get to the elevator. Before Jason could move out of her way, she brushed up against his arm. He felt like a jerk, but he didn't look at her, only listened to the door swish behind him.

"Well, now that we have this taken care of, I am going back to bed," Carly announced. She wrapped her arms around Sonny's arm. "You coming with me?"

"No, I have to talk to Jason."

"Okay." Carly walked back inside, pausing to look at the two. She sent a look of warning at Jason before she walked inside.

"Now what was Brenda really doing here?"

****

Brenda didn't want to go back to Jax, not yet at least. The truth sunk into her. She was too late; Jason was unavailable, and he made that clear tonight. She felt crushed on the inside.

On all romance movies the woman who left the man she loved because the man loved another woman said, "That's fine. I just want you to be happy even if it isn't with me."

Jason was probably jolly with Courtney, but Brenda wished so badly that he could be happy with her. She ruined Jason's life with something that she would look back on and laugh at many years later when she was happily married, if she ever wed. She never felt worse about herself. She was a home wrecker, the other woman that Jason would never be forgiven for. 

She gave up and returned to Jax.

****

"She just forgot something," Jason replied.

"No. No she didn't. You wouldn't have been out in the hallway with her. I can tell when you're lying, now are you going to tell me the truth?" Sonny asked.

"That is the truth, she came here to get something."

"Well, did she get what she came for?"

No. She came for my love, but she didn't get it.

"No. No she didn't."

Sonny pursed his lip and nodded. "Fine, anything else you want to tell me?" Sonny asked. Jason didn't say anything. Sonny didn't press any further but turned to go back inside. Before he shut the door, he muttered,

"You know that Carly and I heard the entire conversation, don't you?" He turned back around, laughing sarcastically. "Jason, what the hell were you thinking?" he shouted. "You know what? Don' t answer that. It all makes sense now. Do you want to go through every woman in Port Charles, don't you? First Courtney then Brenda, what do you get a small glow of satisfaction from doing this? Do you love them both?"

"No." He didn't love Brenda.

"But you slept with them both, right?"

"Yes."

"You are an idiot. You are a damned idiot. And Brenda didn't screw your life, you did it to yourself."

Sonny slammed the door shut.

****

Courtney forced her eyes down at her feet as she walked inside Kelly's to get herself a cup of coffee. She walked straight to the counter a mumbled,

"I need a coffee to go."

"Courtney, hold on," a voice behind her called. Courtney kept her head down, and she felt a hand tugging on her shoulder. Courtney looked up and, seeing the depressed look on Courtney's face, Carly backed off a little.

"Courtney, you look….."

"A little worse for wear?" Courtney suggested.

"Upset," Carly corrected. "How are you feeling?"

"Been better," Courtney said, accepting a cup of coffee. "Don't know if I have been worse."

"Oh Courtney." Carly rubbed her shoulder sympathetically.

Behind them, a bell jingled, signaling that someone new had entered Kelly's. Courtney turned her head, and she saw one of the last people she wanted to see enter Kelly's. Courtney's look of abhorrence attracted Carly's attention.

"Oh God. C'mon, Courtney, let's go downstairs. You don't have to deal with this now," Carly said, tugging at her arm to lead her downstairs.

Courtney let Carly pull her downstairs, but she never let her eyes leave Brenda. Once downstairs, Carly shoved Courtney down into a chair, ushering to her details of her opening night, which was coming up soon.

Seeing that Courtney obviously had her mind someplace, Carly sat down in front of her in another chair.

"Don't think about her," Carly said, referring to Brenda upstairs. "She's not worth your time, Courtney."

Courtney smiled. "I'm not even thinking about her," she replied, rubbing her temple. "I was just thinking that opening night is going to be really amazing."

It was not Carly's turn to smile now. "You know, you'll get through this, Courtney. Jason lo…." Carly was left hanging on her last word as the sound of clinking on the stairs told the two that a visitor was coming downstairs to see them.

"What do you want?" Carly asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Don't worry, Carly," Brenda smirked. "I'm not here to see you. I just need to talk to Courtney. Alone."

****

Sonny took a sip of his drink, staring out the window into the slashing rain.

Jason had to change. He couldn't stay the way he was.

Jason had to change, and Sonny would make sure of it even if it came to him taking care of it personally. . .

A/N This chapter may have been a little boring, but the story is coming to a closing. And, if any of you are wondering, the story is going to be rushed a tad and ended in the next. There will be a sequel, I already know, but you have to read it to find out Jason's love. That's why I kept Ric alive- for a sequel! Please review!