Disclaimer: Don't own HP, nor "I'm a Soldier." By Eminem.

Auother note: Ok i was on the bus listen to Eminem and was like. DUDE I COULD MAKE THIS A HARRY POTTER PARODY! WHEEEEEEE! So I came home a messed with the song. I changed a lot. But I did keep a lot of the original words. I tried my damnedest to make it sound REALLY close to Draco Malfoy's POV. If I managed to just to FUCK UP the original song I'll take this piece of shit down. I might add more it depends...........it does really...........



"I'M A WIZARD." sung by Draco Malfoy to the rhyme of Eminem's "I'm a Soldier."



I'm a wizard

I'm a wizard

I'm a wizard

I'm a wizard

Verse 1:

Yo... Never was good, just infatuated with looks, Never was a wizard, till I graduated to one

And got the rep of a villain, for wand concealin'. Took the image of the good, kept shit appealin'

Willin' to cut someone's neck, for respect if it meant life or death, never live to regret what I said

When you're me, people just want to see, if its true, if its you, what you say in your insults, what you do

So they feel, as part of your obligation to fulfill, when they see you on knockturn alley, face to face, are you for real

In confrontation ain't no conversation, if you feel you're in violation, any hesitation'll get you killed

If you feel it, kill it, if you conceal it, reveal it. Being reasonable will leave you full of curses, point it, release it

Till its empty, tempt me, push me, pussies, I need a good reason to give this wand a good squeeze...

Chorus: I'm a wizard, these shoulders hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never fall or fold up

I'm a wizard, Even if my collar bones crush or crumble, I will never slip or stumble

I'm a wizard, These shoulders hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never fall or fold up

I'm a wizard, Even if my collar bones crush or crumble, I will never stumble

Verse 2:

I love pissin' you off, it gets me off, like my parents, when the fuckin' dark lord lets me off

All you motherfuckas gotta do is set me off, I'll violate and all the motherfuckin' bets be off

I'm a lit fuse, anything I do bring it's news, wand whippin' motherfuckin' bouncers, six-two, who needs wands?

Soon as I pull it, you sweat bullets, an excellent method to get rid of the next bully

It's actually better cause instead you murderin', you can hurt em' and come back again and kick dirt at em

It's like pourin' salt in the wounds, assault and get kill, you can smell the goodies soon as I waltz in the room

Everybody halts and stops, calls the aurors, all you see is bitches comin' out their halter tops

Runnin' and duckin' out to the Hot Rocks parking lot, you'll all get shot whether its your fault or not, cus...



Verse 3:

I spit it slow so these kids know that I'm talkin' to em, give it back to these damn critics and sock it to em

I'm like a good, with a little bit of Pot-ter influence, I spew it, and look how I got you bitches rockin' to it

You motherfuckas could never do it like I could do it, don't even try it, you'll look stupid, do not pursue it

Don't ever in your life, try to knock the truest, I spit the illest shit, ever been dropped to two inch

So ticky-tock listen as the sound ticks on the clock, listen to the sound of Ginny as she licks on a cock

Listen to the sound of me spillin' my heart through this quill, motherfuckers know that I'll never be Malfoy again

Full of controversy until I retire my jersey, till the fire inside dies and expires at thirty

And Merlin have mercy on any more of these DeathEaters that verse me, and put a curse on authorities in the face of adversity

I'm a...

I'm a wizard, these shoulders hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never fall or fold up

I'm a wizard, Even if my collar bones crush or crumble, I will never slip or stumble

I'm a wizard, These shoulders hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never fall or fold up

I'm a wizard, Even if my collar bones crush or crumble, I will never stumble

Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left

Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left

Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left

Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left