Disclaimer: I don't own Abby, Carter or any of the ER 'gang' or the song
Goodbye to You by Michelle Branch
I've Been Searching In My Soul
----- 2 Months Later -----
She'd been seeing Luka for just less than 2 months. Since Carter had left she'd felt empty - if she was honest she knew Luka didn't fill the void but it was nice to have a constant - something that she could rely on.
Who was she kidding? Carter's departure had hit her harder than she had anticipated. She'd expected to miss him and had expected him to call her once in a while when she wasn't expecting it but it had never entered her mind that she'd look at photos of them and want him back with her in Chicago so much that it hurt or find herself staying in when her shift was over just to make sure that she didn't miss a call from him.
Tonight wasn't going to be like that though, her and Luka were going to going out and have a good time - it was only going to be dinner when he'd finished his shift but still, it would be fun - or so she told herself.
She was just about to get changed when the phone rang, she debated whether to answer it or not but decided against it and walked into the bedroom. She heard the answering machine click on and she heard that familiar, lighthearted voice. She ran from the bedroom pulling her shirt back over her head as she went.
'Well, I'll call you back somet.'
She frantically picked up the receiver.
'Hi'
'Oh, hi Abby'
'Sorry, I was in the bedroom'
It was only a half lie.
'Ok then'
She made herself comfortable on the couch
'Its been a while since you called'
'It's been a week!'
'Yeah, that's a long'
'Well, I'm sorry but you know I've been working dodgy shifts recently and what with my hectic social life I've been busy'
'Well, thanks a lot' She then realised what he'd said. 'Shit'
'What?'
'I'll be right back'
She scanned the room looking for her bag. She crossed the room to get it from the table. She fumbled around trying to find her cell-phone. She walked back to the couch and Carter whilst dialling his cell-phone number.
'Hello?'
'Hi Luka'
'Abby, hi'
'Um, I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it tonight'
'Are you Ok?'
'Yeah, I'm just tires and I've got an early shift tomorrow'
'Well, Ok then'
'Some other time'
'Better tell Weaver I can pull that double then'
'Why bother? If anyone asks we did go out'
He laughed
'See you tomorrow'
'Bye'
She put the cell phone down as she picked up the other phone.
'Carter? You still there?'
He mumbled something indistinguishable, which probably meant his mouth, was full.
'What are you eating?'
'While you were gone I ordered in pizza - the delivery guy's just been'
'Very funny - I wasn't gone that long'
'I'm afraid you were'
'Miss me or was I costing you money'
'Both but I'll hold you to the cost of a pizza when I get back'
She loved it when he said that - it made it sound closer to when he would actually come back, closer to when she'd see him, it made it seem like he wanted to come back, that he wasn't going to abandon her and the snow in Chicago and only return for family occasions and conferences.
'You still there?'
'Hmm, yeah, sorry'
'Are you Ok?'
'Yeah, just thinking'
'Oh my God, you think?'
'Well, I try not to but it comes naturally'
'Ok, lets change the subject before you turn this around and insult me to within an inch of my life'
'Too right'
'Whatever! Anyway, how is everyone?'
'Not a lot has changed since last week but Weaver's still Weaver, Susan's dating a guy from upstairs.'
And so the conversation went on; so much for the early night.
----- The Next Day -----
Coffee with the infamous Susan Lewis - she had mastered the art of making you pour your soul and then making you regret it shortly afterwards. She maybe a good friend; just a good friend who liked to gossip a little too much.
'Hey'
'Coffee?'
'Ask a stupid question'
Susan let out a short laugh
'So how are things with you and Luka?'
'Well, you know, Ok'
'Ok? What is that supposed to mean?'
'Here we go' Abby thought
Susan continued
'Ok could mean good, quite good, very good, not so well. Would you please expand on Ok'
Abby couldn't help but giggle, Susan had gone too long without coffee.
'Well, I cancelled our date last night'
'What? Why?'
Was she supposed to tell her and risk getting a lecture or was she supposed to keep it a secret? It couldn't hurt - Susan was a friend, she wouldn't judge her.
'Carter called'
'You cancelled your date because Carter called? Are you crazy? Has this happened before?'
'Yes, probably and yes. Anyway, why is it such a big deal? I hadn't spoken to him in ages'
Susan raised her eyebrows
'How long is ages?'
'A week'
'Are you serious? And this has happened before?'
'Once or twice and can you please stop with the questions?'
Susan paused to think as her coffee arrived while Abby got annoyed with Susan, she wasn't really helping - not that there was a situation that she needed help with.
'Well, I hate to break it to you but I think you've fallen victim to a good, old, schoolgirl crush'
'You're kidding right?'
'Would you stand up a date for me, if I called out of the blue?'
'I didn't stand him up, I just, cancelled the date'
Abby replied trying to convince herself Susan was wrong.
'Don't change the subject'
'You know what, I've got to go'
'Hmm, whatever'
'I'll see you later'
'Something like that'
She picked up her coffee and walked out onto the street. She wasn't really annoyed with Susan; she was just annoyed that Susan was right. She had a crush on Carter, as much as she hated to admit it, she couldn't hide from herself or Susan. But what did it matter anyway; it was going to be a long time before she saw him again.
Before she knew it, she was at the river, her feet had taken her there subconsciously, they had taken her to their bench. She sat with her hands cupped around her coffee, staring at the patterns (or lack of them) in the river. Mesmerised by the swirling shapes in the river she didn't notice anyone behind her until a set of hands covered her eyes.
'Guess Who?'
Well, there we go - the second chapter is up!! Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter please continue doing so - Hna xXx
I've Been Searching In My Soul
----- 2 Months Later -----
She'd been seeing Luka for just less than 2 months. Since Carter had left she'd felt empty - if she was honest she knew Luka didn't fill the void but it was nice to have a constant - something that she could rely on.
Who was she kidding? Carter's departure had hit her harder than she had anticipated. She'd expected to miss him and had expected him to call her once in a while when she wasn't expecting it but it had never entered her mind that she'd look at photos of them and want him back with her in Chicago so much that it hurt or find herself staying in when her shift was over just to make sure that she didn't miss a call from him.
Tonight wasn't going to be like that though, her and Luka were going to going out and have a good time - it was only going to be dinner when he'd finished his shift but still, it would be fun - or so she told herself.
She was just about to get changed when the phone rang, she debated whether to answer it or not but decided against it and walked into the bedroom. She heard the answering machine click on and she heard that familiar, lighthearted voice. She ran from the bedroom pulling her shirt back over her head as she went.
'Well, I'll call you back somet.'
She frantically picked up the receiver.
'Hi'
'Oh, hi Abby'
'Sorry, I was in the bedroom'
It was only a half lie.
'Ok then'
She made herself comfortable on the couch
'Its been a while since you called'
'It's been a week!'
'Yeah, that's a long'
'Well, I'm sorry but you know I've been working dodgy shifts recently and what with my hectic social life I've been busy'
'Well, thanks a lot' She then realised what he'd said. 'Shit'
'What?'
'I'll be right back'
She scanned the room looking for her bag. She crossed the room to get it from the table. She fumbled around trying to find her cell-phone. She walked back to the couch and Carter whilst dialling his cell-phone number.
'Hello?'
'Hi Luka'
'Abby, hi'
'Um, I don't think I'm gonna be able to make it tonight'
'Are you Ok?'
'Yeah, I'm just tires and I've got an early shift tomorrow'
'Well, Ok then'
'Some other time'
'Better tell Weaver I can pull that double then'
'Why bother? If anyone asks we did go out'
He laughed
'See you tomorrow'
'Bye'
She put the cell phone down as she picked up the other phone.
'Carter? You still there?'
He mumbled something indistinguishable, which probably meant his mouth, was full.
'What are you eating?'
'While you were gone I ordered in pizza - the delivery guy's just been'
'Very funny - I wasn't gone that long'
'I'm afraid you were'
'Miss me or was I costing you money'
'Both but I'll hold you to the cost of a pizza when I get back'
She loved it when he said that - it made it sound closer to when he would actually come back, closer to when she'd see him, it made it seem like he wanted to come back, that he wasn't going to abandon her and the snow in Chicago and only return for family occasions and conferences.
'You still there?'
'Hmm, yeah, sorry'
'Are you Ok?'
'Yeah, just thinking'
'Oh my God, you think?'
'Well, I try not to but it comes naturally'
'Ok, lets change the subject before you turn this around and insult me to within an inch of my life'
'Too right'
'Whatever! Anyway, how is everyone?'
'Not a lot has changed since last week but Weaver's still Weaver, Susan's dating a guy from upstairs.'
And so the conversation went on; so much for the early night.
----- The Next Day -----
Coffee with the infamous Susan Lewis - she had mastered the art of making you pour your soul and then making you regret it shortly afterwards. She maybe a good friend; just a good friend who liked to gossip a little too much.
'Hey'
'Coffee?'
'Ask a stupid question'
Susan let out a short laugh
'So how are things with you and Luka?'
'Well, you know, Ok'
'Ok? What is that supposed to mean?'
'Here we go' Abby thought
Susan continued
'Ok could mean good, quite good, very good, not so well. Would you please expand on Ok'
Abby couldn't help but giggle, Susan had gone too long without coffee.
'Well, I cancelled our date last night'
'What? Why?'
Was she supposed to tell her and risk getting a lecture or was she supposed to keep it a secret? It couldn't hurt - Susan was a friend, she wouldn't judge her.
'Carter called'
'You cancelled your date because Carter called? Are you crazy? Has this happened before?'
'Yes, probably and yes. Anyway, why is it such a big deal? I hadn't spoken to him in ages'
Susan raised her eyebrows
'How long is ages?'
'A week'
'Are you serious? And this has happened before?'
'Once or twice and can you please stop with the questions?'
Susan paused to think as her coffee arrived while Abby got annoyed with Susan, she wasn't really helping - not that there was a situation that she needed help with.
'Well, I hate to break it to you but I think you've fallen victim to a good, old, schoolgirl crush'
'You're kidding right?'
'Would you stand up a date for me, if I called out of the blue?'
'I didn't stand him up, I just, cancelled the date'
Abby replied trying to convince herself Susan was wrong.
'Don't change the subject'
'You know what, I've got to go'
'Hmm, whatever'
'I'll see you later'
'Something like that'
She picked up her coffee and walked out onto the street. She wasn't really annoyed with Susan; she was just annoyed that Susan was right. She had a crush on Carter, as much as she hated to admit it, she couldn't hide from herself or Susan. But what did it matter anyway; it was going to be a long time before she saw him again.
Before she knew it, she was at the river, her feet had taken her there subconsciously, they had taken her to their bench. She sat with her hands cupped around her coffee, staring at the patterns (or lack of them) in the river. Mesmerised by the swirling shapes in the river she didn't notice anyone behind her until a set of hands covered her eyes.
'Guess Who?'
Well, there we go - the second chapter is up!! Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter please continue doing so - Hna xXx
