TITLE: Angry All The Time
Chapter Four: Home Coming
AUTHOR: Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the 7th Heaven characters, but as a writer I claim the right to alter facts and fill in blanks as needed...Please don't sue me. I'm writing only for fun. Any unfamiliar faces are figments of my twisted imagination.
WARNING: This fic deals with domestic violence. Please do not read if you think you will be upset by such issues.
Angry All The Time
Chapter 4/?
Home Coming
My parents still lived in the same old house from my childhood. The house the church gave them when Dad came to Glen Oak Community Church. It looked bigger than I remembered. And so many windows. I didn't remember so many windows.
I stopped the car and just sat there blinking back the tears. The children were all sleeping, except Kev-Vincent. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, looked at me and reached out to pat my hand, his silence saying more than words ever could.
"Stay with them," I whispered, and he nodded. I slipped out of the car, leaving the door open so it wouldn't wake the children when it closed. I took several deep breaths and concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other to keep my steps steady.
I felt strange knocking on the door. My parent's house. The house I grew up in. I shouldn't have to knock. I didn't have a key.
I focused on my breathing to keep the thoughts at bay. After several minutes, I accepted the fact no one was going to answer. What if Kevin had called them? He could have threatened them. He could have flown out here and been here days ago. I should have called them. Days ago. The first night. I should have called them.
I'll never forgive myself if...No. Stop it. Kevin would never...I had to block those thoughts. Once they started, I would break down and I couldn't. Not here, not now. Not in front of the children.
I felt my knees weaken. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over. I leaned against the door and gave in. I just couldn't fight it any more.
"Mom?"
"Stay with the kids, Vincent," I called out to him. "Take them out to run in the back yard. I'll be all right in a minute." I listened to the sounds of the children climbing out of the car. I knew Vincent didn't want to leave me, but he would do as I asked. He would take care of the other children.
Five minutes later, or maybe ten, I looked up at the sound of a car pulling into the drive. I wiped my eyes and my cheeks and squinted with my hand against my forehead to shield the harsh glow from the sun. Simon? My heart fluttered at the sight of my brother as he got out of his car.
"Luce?" He crossed the yard with wide legged strides. My little brother wasn't so little anymore. He was quite the man, tall and solid, sturdy. I never realized how much Vincent looked like him. Thank goodness Vincent didn't get the thick eyebrows.
I pulled on my blouse to straighten it, to make myself look better. More presentable, more like the sister he used to know. I felt a new wave of tears pushing at the surface. I didn't want to cry again. Not now.
"Luce, what are you doing here?"
"I brought the kids to see Mom and Dad." He looked around, searching for his nieces and nephews. "Vincent took them out back."
"Vincent?"
"Kevin Jr. He wants to be called Vincent now." Simon deserved some kind of medal if he understood even a word I said. I couldn't understand myself, my words so thick with the tears I struggled to keep unshed.
Simon took both my hands in his and brought them together like a sandwich. "Where's Kevin?"
I shook my head and my mouth moved but there were no words. The tears came. Rushing, like a river. Flowing like rain. Simon pulled me against him, held me to his chest, stroked my hair. He smelled like cologne and sweat and baby food. I tried to think how old the baby would be. The days all blurred together. I couldn't remember. Three months? Four? Maybe six or seven. Horror rose like a bubble in my throat when I realized I couldn't even remember the baby's name. I'm a terrible aunt, a horrible sister.
"Let's get you inside," Simon jiggled his keys to get the right one to open the door. I didn't want him to let go. I wanted to lose myself in the solid warmth of him.
He led me to the kitchen and offered to fix me something to eat or drink. I refused both. He busied himself rearranging things on the counter to give me time to regroup.
"It's really no trouble."
"I'm fine, Simon. Really."
"You don't look it."
"I left Kevin." The words came easily, more easily than I had thought. I left Kevin. Just like that, I said it. I left Kevin.
Simon put his hand on my shoulder. It felt like Dad's hand. I turned my face to his chest again, and he wrapped his arms around me.
I mostly remembered Simon as a bratty little kid, or an insolent teenager. By the time his hormones leveled out and his attitude calmed down, I was long gone, living in Buffalo with my husband. I always wondered how Simon would turn out, I figured he would fall by the way side and disappoint the family somehow.
"You're safe here, Luce."
"I know." I whispered and lay my cheek against his shoulder.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
End chapter 4. Tell me what you think! Please R/R. Thanks! Lucky Star (JJsLUckyStar@aol.com)
Chapter Four: Home Coming
AUTHOR: Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the 7th Heaven characters, but as a writer I claim the right to alter facts and fill in blanks as needed...Please don't sue me. I'm writing only for fun. Any unfamiliar faces are figments of my twisted imagination.
WARNING: This fic deals with domestic violence. Please do not read if you think you will be upset by such issues.
Angry All The Time
Chapter 4/?
Home Coming
My parents still lived in the same old house from my childhood. The house the church gave them when Dad came to Glen Oak Community Church. It looked bigger than I remembered. And so many windows. I didn't remember so many windows.
I stopped the car and just sat there blinking back the tears. The children were all sleeping, except Kev-Vincent. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, looked at me and reached out to pat my hand, his silence saying more than words ever could.
"Stay with them," I whispered, and he nodded. I slipped out of the car, leaving the door open so it wouldn't wake the children when it closed. I took several deep breaths and concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other to keep my steps steady.
I felt strange knocking on the door. My parent's house. The house I grew up in. I shouldn't have to knock. I didn't have a key.
I focused on my breathing to keep the thoughts at bay. After several minutes, I accepted the fact no one was going to answer. What if Kevin had called them? He could have threatened them. He could have flown out here and been here days ago. I should have called them. Days ago. The first night. I should have called them.
I'll never forgive myself if...No. Stop it. Kevin would never...I had to block those thoughts. Once they started, I would break down and I couldn't. Not here, not now. Not in front of the children.
I felt my knees weaken. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over. I leaned against the door and gave in. I just couldn't fight it any more.
"Mom?"
"Stay with the kids, Vincent," I called out to him. "Take them out to run in the back yard. I'll be all right in a minute." I listened to the sounds of the children climbing out of the car. I knew Vincent didn't want to leave me, but he would do as I asked. He would take care of the other children.
Five minutes later, or maybe ten, I looked up at the sound of a car pulling into the drive. I wiped my eyes and my cheeks and squinted with my hand against my forehead to shield the harsh glow from the sun. Simon? My heart fluttered at the sight of my brother as he got out of his car.
"Luce?" He crossed the yard with wide legged strides. My little brother wasn't so little anymore. He was quite the man, tall and solid, sturdy. I never realized how much Vincent looked like him. Thank goodness Vincent didn't get the thick eyebrows.
I pulled on my blouse to straighten it, to make myself look better. More presentable, more like the sister he used to know. I felt a new wave of tears pushing at the surface. I didn't want to cry again. Not now.
"Luce, what are you doing here?"
"I brought the kids to see Mom and Dad." He looked around, searching for his nieces and nephews. "Vincent took them out back."
"Vincent?"
"Kevin Jr. He wants to be called Vincent now." Simon deserved some kind of medal if he understood even a word I said. I couldn't understand myself, my words so thick with the tears I struggled to keep unshed.
Simon took both my hands in his and brought them together like a sandwich. "Where's Kevin?"
I shook my head and my mouth moved but there were no words. The tears came. Rushing, like a river. Flowing like rain. Simon pulled me against him, held me to his chest, stroked my hair. He smelled like cologne and sweat and baby food. I tried to think how old the baby would be. The days all blurred together. I couldn't remember. Three months? Four? Maybe six or seven. Horror rose like a bubble in my throat when I realized I couldn't even remember the baby's name. I'm a terrible aunt, a horrible sister.
"Let's get you inside," Simon jiggled his keys to get the right one to open the door. I didn't want him to let go. I wanted to lose myself in the solid warmth of him.
He led me to the kitchen and offered to fix me something to eat or drink. I refused both. He busied himself rearranging things on the counter to give me time to regroup.
"It's really no trouble."
"I'm fine, Simon. Really."
"You don't look it."
"I left Kevin." The words came easily, more easily than I had thought. I left Kevin. Just like that, I said it. I left Kevin.
Simon put his hand on my shoulder. It felt like Dad's hand. I turned my face to his chest again, and he wrapped his arms around me.
I mostly remembered Simon as a bratty little kid, or an insolent teenager. By the time his hormones leveled out and his attitude calmed down, I was long gone, living in Buffalo with my husband. I always wondered how Simon would turn out, I figured he would fall by the way side and disappoint the family somehow.
"You're safe here, Luce."
"I know." I whispered and lay my cheek against his shoulder.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
End chapter 4. Tell me what you think! Please R/R. Thanks! Lucky Star (JJsLUckyStar@aol.com)
