Sonic's A Daddy?

By Kiyo-chan

Chapter 6: A crazy Lamaze class! Reunion of old loves…

A/N: This chapter gives people a really hysterical idea about what it's like to go to a baby class. It's also mostly about Knuckles and his rendezvous with the batgirl that left him all those months ago. And you'll also find out how Knuckles lives!

Tails, Knuckles, and Shadow walked along the long halls of the apartment complex that Knuckles had been staying at since his accident with the cat and the fire truck. The echidna had been acting strangely for an hour since they all gathered up together to accompany him to his apartment. Tails looked down and saw half a dozen chickens by his feet.  Shadow's eyes widen as the chickens gathered around him. Knuckles' eyes began to shine and there was a look of excitement on his face. "Chickens in the hallway…CHICKENS in the hallway! Boy, I wonder what crazy guy thought THAT up!" The echidna laughed. Shadow leered at him. "What'd you do, rent a couple of chickens?" the unenthusiastic hedgehog asked. "Yes," Knuckles said. "And don't step on them or I'll lose my deposit!" The other three gave him a Look and they continued to walk to his apartment. Finally, they reached the apartment. It was clean enough to see the floor, but some trace evidence that this place hadn't been clean in a long time was visible all over the apartment. Tails saw a piece of half-eaten pizza on the floor and had nearly stepped on it. Shadow was trying to find a remote to the thirty-two inch TV but when he reached between the couch curtains, he felt something sticky on his hand. He pulled his hand up and melted marshmallows were all over it. Shadow groaned and rubbed the sticky food off by rubbing his hand on the couch. Knuckles handed him the remote while Tails still looked around the place. He noticed all the laundry had been strewn all over the place. After picking up a pair of underwear from a picture frame (A/N: The underwear is clean, people…) he noticed the picture next to it was spared of any garbage or laundry. It was a picture of a very beautiful batgirl. She's really hot, Tails thought. He brought the picture over to Knuckles and showed it to him. "Who's this, Knuckles?" he asked. Shadow looked at him as though he was asking the same question, and if Sonic were there, he would be asking that as well. "Okay, I'll tell you. Her name is Chantal, she's a French treasure hunter, and I fell in love with her when I had my accident all those months ago…"

In the clear and slightly breezy September day, the two hedgehogs were walking into a building for a Lamaze class. Sonic had never been there before, and he was nervous. He looked around and saw many pregnant women as far or further along than his wife, who was six months pregnant. "Wow!" Sonic exclaimed. "These women are FAT!" Amy's pink face was now an angry red as she punched her husband's arm. "Sonic, you'll embarrass us…" Sonic shrugged as he laid down on the pillows. "Ah…" he sighed as he looked at the pretty fox woman laying in the pillows next to him with a handsome male fox next to her. "Hi…that's my wife…" He pointed up at Amy. "I'm her daddy…I mean, her tummy's daddy…I mean, I'm the guy that did that to her…" Both of the foxes laughed at his remark. Sonic then looked up at Amy, who was glaring at him. "The pillows are for me, Sonic," she told him. Sonic got up from the pillows and let his wife lay on them. "Oh, it's all about you, isn't it!?" he teased sarcastically. Amy smiled at the fox woman. "Hi…that's my husband…and yet, I'm having a child with him. I'm Amy and that's Sonic." Amy shook the fox woman's hand. "I'm Alicia Karnes," the fox woman told her. Sonic looked over at the male fox. He wanted to shake his hand, but he didn't want to take his hands off Amy's shoulders. But…his intuition took over and he let go of her shoulder. Amy began wobbling forward and back. Sonic grinned playfully. "Hey! Look at that! You wobble like a weeble!" He put his hands on her left leg and shoulder and made her wobble again until he put her hands back on her shoulders. Then the male fox introduced himself. "I'm Sean Karnes," he told the blue hedgehogs. The two let go of their wives' shoulders. As the two shook hands, their pregnant wives began wobbling like weebles.

Meanwhile, back at Knuckles' apartment, Tails and Shadow stared at Knuckles with newfound sympathy. "I'm sorry that happened, Knuckles," Tails whispered as he patted the crying echidna's back. Shadow looked at him with a small tear going down his face. "Are you crying, Shadow?" Rouge asked, walking into the apartment. Next to her was the batgirl that looked exactly like the one Knuckles had a picture of. "Chantal!" Knuckles cried. He ran over to hold her and his face met with the wall. "Knuckles, I am over here," Chantal told Knuckles and waved impatiently at him. "Oh." Knuckles hugged her then. "Isn't that sweet," Rouge said sarcastically. "Now, c'mon. We're going to miss our reservations." "CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE HAVING A MOMENT HERE!?!?!?" Knuckles screamed. "Okay, okay…whatever…" the others muttered.

"I've done it! I've put on a diaper!" Sonic yelled, raising the doll up in the air. "Very nice, Sonic," the teacher told him. "But you missed one thing: The diaper doesn't go over the baby's head." "Bwah!" Sonic yelled, throwing the doll across the room and knocking out a woman who was five months pregnant. "Stupid hedgehog!" her husband yelled. "Thank you! I'm here till Wednesday!" Sonic waved. Amy cleared her throat and glared at him. "Or until my wife tells me to go home." After the unconscious pregnant woman went to the clinic, the lessons resumed. "Okay, class. Now we are going to learn how to burp newborns. Cradling the baby's chest in one hand and setting the baby on your knee, gently pat the baby's back." Amy did the exact right position but Sonic wasn't so lucky. He put the baby on his knee, cradled the chest in one hand and as soon as he patted the baby, the head came off. "Miss, mine broke!" Sonic yelled. "Could you get me that head, Alicia?" he asked the fox woman. As soon as Alicia gave him the doll's head, she gasped. "I think my water just broke!" she cried. "Miss, mine broke!" Sean yelled. The teacher panicked. "Oh, God. What's going on here? What do I do!?" "Uh, teach?" Sonic asked. "We call the goddamn ambulance!" Finally, the teacher listened to him and the hospital ambulance wailed away with the two couples.

Shadow, Tails, Knuckles, Chantal, and Rouge ran into the hospital where Sonic and Amy were waiting outside. "How is she?" Tails asked. "Well, they're the parents of an adorable baby boy," Amy smiled. She looked over at her husband, who was looking down. "Sonic, what's wrong?" she asked. Sonic sighed. "It's…lately, I've felt like I can't be a good enough father because my own parents died when I was young and I don't remember them much. I'm afraid Monica won't, either." Amy patted Sonic's back. "C'mon, Sonic, I think you can be a good father. You're more responsible than most guys your age. You saved the world more than once, you know." Sonic nodded. He looked over at Chantal. "Who the hell is she?" he asked. Knuckles put his arm around her. "My girlfriend, Chantal. I met her after my…accident." "Oh, okay. Anyone hungry?" Sonic asked. "Sure!" All of them walked out the door and to the pizza place next door.

End of Chapter 6

A/N: 'Nother weird chapter. Please R/R for suggestions.