Authors Note: Thanks again to the reviewers, and as I have nothing to say, well, read on the next chapter!
Chapter 10-Secret?
'Jin-san?' Sendo said softy. The boy looked up at them. It was very clear that he had been crying.
* * * * * * * *
Jin saw four teenagers, 3 guys and 1 girl. The girl walked towards him, with the rest following behind.
'Are you all right?' she asked. There was something in her voice that weren't in many other people, something he longed for, yet never had.
Then, suddenly he realized that he recognized them. The three guys were Kenji Fujima, Akira Sendo, and Kaede Rukawa. The girl, on the other hand was Aya Kenzen, the only girl basketball player, playing for Shohoku High.
'What a weird combination,' he thought to himself.
'Fine,' he answered shortly. He had learned from experience that nobody was willing. Nobody was sincere. Even Nobunaga and Maki had turned away when he needed them. They didn't help when they should. That was the way of the world. "I'll be your friend, you can be mine, while those who have problems just shut the hell up." But then again, there was something in this four… something he couldn't place… something different.
* * * * * * * *
'Jin-san, are you sure you're all right? We might be able to help, if you let us,' it was Sendo. Sendo was feeling as if he was comforting another teenager who was… alone, like Aya. He always felt sad, sorry, but most of all angry when he comforted Aya. Right now he was feeling the same. Angry at the people, hard-hearted people who made other people suffer. They took and took without giving back. That's not what one would call love. That's what we all call selfishness. He felt, they all felt that Jin belonged to the group. There were no words, but… the feeling was just there, the way they felt Fujima belonged in they circle. Jin looked from one to another, wondering what they were up to, trying to discern their thoughts and actions. Why were they so nice to him?
'Why don't we go to my house? We can talk it through, my mom won't be at home now,' Sendo said brightly. Aya held out her hand. She wasn't smiling, but her eyes were. Her eyes seemed to say…
'I think I understand what you are going through, and I'll think of every possible way to help you.' Yet, in his heart, Jin still doubted her sincerity. Who would think of trying their best to help you if even your mom doesn't? In this modernizing world, you have to watch your own back.
'What about school?' he asked.
'Leave that, it's boring,' Rukawa said.
'Yeah, and anyway we're already like 1 hour late, not that it is such a big deal, but…' Fujima added, ending his sentence with a shrug.
As they were walking to Sendo's house, Jin was sort of walking a little way of, looking at them, evaluating them. He realized that the thing that struck a person most was the way they seemed so… together. The way they understood each other so well that they blended together into something totally different. They didn't need to hide. They didn't hide from all the world's pain, they just… leaned on each other. He realized that he wanted to be with them, in there, where he could unite together, and not be afraid of any thing that comes his way. He wanted to stop running away from all his problems. He wanted to be in there where he felt strong. And miraculously, he, for the first time in his life, felt accepted. Rationally he dismissed that idea, but that feeling couldn't just be ignored… could it? As he was wondering to himself, he suddenly realized that the girl, Aya was walking beside him. She smiled at him, not a fake smile, it wasn't put on, and straight away, he felt accepted and… loved.
'You're Jin from Kainan right? Three-pointer?' She asked, her face never losing its brightness. He nodded.
'Are you usually this quiet?'
'The way people act on the outside doesn't always display the feelings they have inside,' was his philosophical reply. Her smile didn't fade away, she didn't seemed annoyed at him. In fact, her smile grew wider.
'You are so true. Don't you think we are a weird group?' She asked pointing to the three of them and then at herself. Nod. She seemed to understand just what he needed. She didn't comment on his coldness.
'Sendo, Ryonan's sophomore, the out-going one. He seems so sure of himself, usually, and he's the I-don't care, can't-get-his-time-straight kind of guy. Rukawa, rookie of Shohoku high, always very cold and a loner. He's also the I-don't-care kind of guy and has a weird way of attracting girls with his cold don't-bother-me air. Fujima, the head of Shoyo Basketball club, all smiley and a third year, he is the one who gets us all in order. I never expected to be accepted in such a group. But they are the ones who stood up for me, especially in the case of… my family problem. They understand me and I realized that if I just let them in, they'd continue caring for me, the way I would for them. The three of them unite into something that is a total opposite of they attitude. Besides, we find that when we truly display what we feel inside, we are not what we seem and what we put on. Everybody is as vulnerable as the next,' she said, looking at them, her mind clearly viewing all the things that happened in the past which was a total mystery to Jin.
They reached Sendo's house. Jin was surprised to see the way they all treated it as they own house, own… home. They switched on the TV, took food without Sendo's permission.
'Um… Sendo, is this the way you people usually act?' he asked.
'Yup, do the same, make yourself at home, I mean really, like them.' Sendo replied. He too went out of the living room. They all returned together, each of them holding a can of drink except Rukawa who was holding two. As they entered, Jin suddenly felt warm, it was as if they were carrying a fire, not a dangerous one, but one to warm people up and to show the way, lighting up they life. They just seemed to make the prospect of living, the fate that he had to face ever so much brighter. Rukawa handed him a drink, smiling.
'Jin, you said that the way a person acts outside doesn't display the feelings that they have inside. You're right. Even though that is a natural thing to do, we have to realize that doing that makes no sense. Why try to pretend and act tough when everyone just needs help and support? Everyone. There are no exceptions. If one doesn't want to hear the troubles you have, then they can't be considered your friends. And if they really are your friends, you don't need to pretend because a friend can accept you the way you are,' Aya said softly.
'We'll understand, or at least try to. Aya had problems too, she would understand if none of us could.' Rukawa said, glancing at her.
'They were seriously a great help. Sendo as a friend who helped me since I was young. Rukawa, a lover, had always been there though I didn't realize it. And Fujima as a half-brother helped me in a totally different way…and if you want to know what happened in my life…uh…um well… I was uh… my dad used to um… abuse me. Um… all ways,' she concluded.
The three of them stared at her amazed. Jin started. He then realized that everyone did have troubles, and while some were not willing to let it out, some were. And the ones who did we much better off.
'Listen, she must really trust you, never in my whole life did she ever tell some one about her past so bluntly. And if you could return her trust, our trust you'd be much better off. You don't have to, you know, tell us if you don't want to, but it'll do you some good,' Sendo said, somberly (can Sendo be somber?) to Jin.
'We know, and I bet you know too, that it is not easy to go blabbing about our past hurt and pain. Yeah, a lot of people want to do so, but it is not at all easy, so we'd understand if you don't want to, or if you take your time,' Fujima added. There was silence for practically 3 minutes, and at long last Jin nodded hesitantly.
'My parents, they are always fighting, all the time. It makes me sick… sad. And I know that I shouldn't take sides, but I think my mom is too much. She complains non-stop and compares my dad with other people. My dad's stressed out. Then, she makes it worse by telling him that my grades in school are sliding terribly because of my basketball practices. Well, my grades aren't that good, but they are not bad either. Besides, it isn't really sliding that badly. She told me to quit basketball, I refused, and she told my dad. I didn't like seeing him so bothered, stressed out. It hurts me. But I don't want to quit basketball either *sigh*. They've changed. Changed tremendously, '
'Changed?' Rukawa asked
'Yeah, my dad's been more stressed, my mom, more irritatingly fault-finding.'
'Since?' Fujima asked.
'Since that call. That call which required him to remember a past he had been trying to hide from, a past he had tried to run away from. He seems more melancholy and quiet. My mom, on the other hand, got more irritated and kept attacking him whenever she had the chance. My mom even uses his past to hurt him, and I hate that.' He said. He never really expected this to actually escape his mouth and heart. But there it was. He had told it out, and the people listening weren't laughing. They were concentrating on what he was saying, Aya didn't say, 'big, fat, deal, mine was worse.' No! All she said was,
'When?'
'Huh?'
'When? When did this thing occur? When was that phone call?' she repeated.
'Oh… about two years ago.'
'They had been acting like that for the past two years and they didn't ask for a divorce?' Sendo asked disbelievingly, earning a reproving look from Aya, and he just smiled sheepishly.
'Did they tell you?' Fujima asked.
'Huh?'
'Did they tell you what happen?'
'Oh… ya.'
'Care to tell?' Aya asked.
'Um… I guess. Well my dad was forced to sleep with this lady once, his cousin in fact, about fifteen years ago. They had this child. My mom hates whoever it is. I think it is a girl. Although my mom always regard that child as 'it', my dad always uses 'she'. My mom seriously hates the child. She keeps telling me to do well, to prove that I'm a real Jin, and all that crap. Then two years ago, he got this call, updating him for the first time in his life about his child, and he felt very guilty, saying that his child went through a lot of hardship. My mom got mad. I really don't understand. That child is mysteriously worth knowing though, because, of course, she is my sister, but also because not many things can actually make my mother as uncomfortable as the mention of that child. That child… I wonder who she is,' he finished. All of them stared at Jin silently for two full minutes. Jin finally realized something was wrong and looked at them.
'Nani?'
'Yare, yare,' Rukawa muttered under his breathe.
Errr…. Well, that's the best I can come up with, hope you guys (and girls) like it.
