~A Poet's Dream~

Chapter Four

When You Were Mine

Christian opened his eyes, his head still throbbing madly. He was still in the strange room at the bottom of the Elephant. That was all he knew. He wondered how long he had been laying here? He struggled to sit up, just as the Duke entered the room.

"Where's Satine?" Christian asked bitterly, his body tensing as the Duke approached.

"She's waiting for me in the Gothic Tower. You must understand, that you cannot make her happy. You cannot give her what I can, Boy. It is better this way."

"She doesn't love you."

"Love...is an over-rated, Bohemian myth. Soon, you will understand that."

Christian eyed the Duke crossly, and tried to rise as the Duke headed toward the door, but his head was swimming, and he found that he was still too weak to stand.

"Satine wishes you well," The Duke smiled, and left Christian to stew in his jealousy.

***

Christian opened his eyes again, and tried to focus on the noise that was coming from outside his room. There were muffled voices, several of them, but he couldn't make out what they were saying. Suddenly, the voices stopped, and Toulouse entered the room.

"Toulouse...wh-where is--"

"Satine? They've already left."

"Wh-What?"

"She and the Duke...they are to be married."

"She doesn't love him," Christian whispered.

"She chose to leave, Christian...she wanted to leave."

"You're lying!" Christian felt his throat closing up.

"I am not lying. She asked me to give this to you. I'm so sorry Christian," Toulouse pulled out a slip of paper, and a ticket, and placed it on the table next to Christian's bed, before silently leaving the room.

Christian picked up the paper, and ran his thumb over it, nervously. He then picked up the ticket, and saw that it was a one-way ticket back to England. Turning his attention back to the note, Christian unfolded the off-white paper slowly, as he swallowed nervously. His eyes scanned the page, and he realized that he had lost...everything.

~

My Darling Christian,

I know that this is all very confusing for you. One moment I love you, the next I tell you I don't, and then...I wish I could tell you that things could end wonderfully, and that I would not have to hurt you again. But The Duke holds much more than my future, and your future, in his hands. You must understand, my darling, that this is for the best. This is all for the best. You will go on, you will find love again. Of this, I am certain. I only hope that when you do find love, you keep a tiny place in your heart for me, as I will for you. I love you Christian, but in the real world, that isn't enough.

Come What May,

Satine

~

Christian felt his eyes welling up with tears. This wasn't the end. It couldn't be.

***~***

~One Week Earlier~

"Where is he? Is he alright?" Satine was panicked and distraught, her frail body shaking violently.

"He'll live," Harold said slowly, "But he isn't yet awake, my dear."

"I must see him, Harold! Please!"

"In time, Satine. Right now you must rest. Tomorrow will be a long day for everyone."

Satine relented, suddenly feeling her exhaustion catching up with her. She slept restlessly, and woke early. Slipping out of her room, she made her way toward the bottom of the elephant, and into the room that no one was supposed to have known about.

Several years earlier, a young courtesan, a brilliant starlet who'd shined as brightly as Satine, had taken her own life in that room. After that night, the room was concealed, and the top of the Elephant was the only room that was to be used.

Satine walked into the darkened room, and sat down next to Christian's unconscious form. She sighed softly, and took Christian's hand, praying that he would open his eyes, for her.

He didn't.

She sat, watching silently, as tears slipped down her face. She opened her mouth, and sang out softly.

"Now I never meant, to do you wrong, that's what I came here to say. But if I was wrong, then I'm sorry; I don't let it stand in our way. As my head just aches, when I think of, the things that I shouldn't have done. But, life is for living, we all know, and I don't wanna live it alone."

She kissed him tenderly, and left the room silently, hoping that he'd heard her plea.

*

"Satine, the Duke has asked for your hand in marriage. He is threatening to close the Moulin Rouge, and to...my darling, I know that you love Christian, but--"

"Harold, I'm dying. I want to spend my final days with the man I love."

"Satine, you are not dying," Harold whispered, and Marie gasped, shocked and hurt that Harold had lied to both of them.

"Pardon?"

"You are not dying. I--I never meant for all of this to happen. But Satine, you threatened to leave with that boy, and I--we needed you...I was desperate, my dear. I am so sorry."

"I'll leave now. Christian and I...we can still go!"

"The Duke will never stop looking for you. And he has sworn to hurt Christian should you refuse him."

"I told him what would happen if--"

"He won't kill Christian...he'll only destroy him...and his family...that's what he said. Satine, I believe that the Duke has gone mad--and I believe he is capable of anything."

Satine, collapsed into her chair, and began to sob. She was trapped--trapped in a world that she loathed with every fiber of her being.

***~***

~Five Years Later~

Christian gazed out the window, watching listlessly as the rain streaked down the windows of his study. Sighing heavily, he sat down at his desk, and picked up the programme once again. He'd often wondered when he and Satine would cross paths again. The show was tomorrow night, and Christian kept changing his mind on whether or not he should attend the play. He knew nothing of the story, nor did he care. The chance to see Satine again...after all this time...it was almost too intense to bear. His thoughts were interrupted when the door to his study opened.

"Sir, pardon the intrusion, but your daughter is asking for you."

"Yes, thank you Nadia."

Christian shook off his reverie, and ascended the stairs toward his three-year old daughter's bedroom.

"Daddy, I had a bad dream," Leah cried sadly.

"Shh, tis alright, my dear, I'm here."

Christian gathered Leah in his arms, and rocked her slowly, as she drifted back into a deep slumber. He watched her as she slept. She looked so much like her mother. But she had his eyes, that much was certain.

Smiling contently, Christian laid his daughter back onto her pillow. He made his way back down toward his study, with memories of a past he'd long ago abandoned dancing in his mind.

~*~

AN: "Life Is For Living" (berryman/buckland/champion/martin)