Disclaimer: Hiya. I don't own anything. And Sara is only PART mine, considering that she is the sister of the guy, Jeremy, who guessed Resident Evil. Sorry, Pattyogreen, but he got it first. But, look, I mentioned you. J Hey, tell ya what. I'll make her name Sara Green. How cool am I? ;)
A/N: Yay, I'm back from the beach. Go me. Ugh, the weather was horrible, but on the bright side, I came up with a plot for Chapter Six. Yay encore! Also, it's a lot longer than some of the other ones, but when you get to the end, you will feel, as I feel, that it was more than worth it. And BTW, sorry it took so long.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It must be love, the way that I feel.
Something inside, oh, tells me it's for real.
Now I know why, it's you I'm thinking of,
Now I know it must be love."
-Mark, It Must Be Love, California Dreams
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Gordo's on a date? So why are you sitting here, talking to me?" Miranda shrieked over the telephone. From where Lizzie was sitting in her kitchen she could see the street. A dark haired little boy, maybe 5 years old was chasing a blond girl about the same age.
*I hope you catch her, kid. And if ya do, make sure you tell her how you feel NOW before life gets complicated.*
She sighed and twisted the phone cord. "Miranda, what would you have me do? Follow him around, crouching behind bushes and shooting her dirty looks?"
"If that's what it takes!"
"No, Miranda," Lizzie snapped, "I can't do it anymore. I can't stand feeling this way. I'll just shut him out of my life. Never speak to him again. Just sit alone in my room until you get back."
Miranda's voice softened. "And you honestly believe that you can do that? Just forget Gordo? Just forget that you love him?"
Lizzie leapt to her feet, and began unceremoniously wrapping herself in the cord. "That's another thing. We're acting like I love him or something. And THAT is absolutely ridiculous."
"How do you figure?"
"HELLO?! Ever since the fourth grade, when I got a crush on him, my feelings have been hot/cold. One minute he'll be all I can think about and the next I'm chasing after brainless idiots with good hair and Italian guys that I don't even know. How can you love someone and treat them like that?" Her voice dropped as she muttered the last sentence.
"You say your feelings for him run hot/cold. But let me ask you a question. When there was that pool party back when you liked Danny Kessler and you KNEW he was going to be there you CHOSE to stay home and tie dye sheets with Gordo. Why?"
Lizzie froze. "I don't know. It just seemed like it'd be more fun."
"More fun than hanging out with a guy you thought you were head over heels for?"
"Well-"
"And after our marriage project, when I was teasing you about being with Gordo, didn't you tell me, "Best friend equals best marriage?""
"I wasn't speaking specifically about him and me."
"How sure of that are you?"
"Um…"
"Why were you so quick to leap to his rescue when you thought Brook might be using him?"
"He's my friend."
"Lizzie, you wanted me to follow him into the men's room."
"That's not the point…"
"Isn't it? And when you wanted to get a job and you were complaining about it, I was sitting there trying to tell you that there was a Help Wanted sign up right behind you. Why did you only notice when Gordo pointed it out?"
"Uh…."
"And you TOLD me that when you were envisioning your gorgeous husband, he was Gordo. NOT Ethan, but Gordo. What was that about?"
"Um…."
"Why were you so upset about Gordo going to high school, Lizzie?"
"You were upset, too!"
"Yes, but NOT the way you were. You told me you just wished that you could tell him how you felt. What were you feeling, Lizzie?"
"I…dunno. I just missed him."
"And when I went out on the dance floor with Ethan, the guy you were so sure that you were crazy about, and Gordo was dancing with Parker, I saw the look you had. One of sadness and mild jealousy. And it wasn't directed at me and Ethan."
"Do you have a point?"
Miranda sighed. "Yes. Look, the point is that your feelings for Gordo were omnipresent. Not always obvious, but they were there. So if you are so certain that your feelings can't be love on account of them being inconsistent … Then I think you have to find another reason or face up to the truth. That you love David Zephyr Gordon. And that you always have."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Twenty minutes later Lizzie hung up the phone, feeling more confused than before. Not about her feelings. No, those were finally clear-too clear, really, but that was for another time.
No, now she had no idea what to do.
Miranda kept insisting that she should just tell him and be done with it. After all, her dark haired friend had pointed out, he had liked Lizzie before anyone else was in the picture. Maybe all she'd have to do was blurt out that she loved him and he would cast aside whatever feelings he had for this other girl, realizing that SHE was the one he was meant to be with.
*It's possible! I didn't realize I liked him until I knew he like ME.*
But she couldn't do it. Because no matter what, she wasn't in a position to chance their friendship like that. If she was wrong, there would be no way to undo the damage she had caused. She would be out one best friend. And one true love.
She sighed and went upstairs to her room, her own sanctuary. Not exactly the brightest move she'd ever made.
There were reminders all over the room of the one that had touched her heart. There were the tie dyed sheets, folded neatly on her desk. Feeling slightly nostalgic, she found herself taking her new sheets off and replacing them with the ones that made her think of Gordo.
-FLASHBACK-
They were laying on the sheets, his head resting gently against her legs. An thought she wasn't even aware she was having slid it's way into her mind. 'I could do this forever. Just lay here next to him, staring at the sky.'
-END FLASHBACK-
That was one of her favorite memories. It was small, simple, and boy, looking back, it seemed so long ago. But it was still close to her heart.
Who was she kidding? Everywhere she turned, she saw something else that made her feel like her heart was being ripped out. She needed to get out of the house, before the lump that was rising in her throat would make its way to the surface.
"Mom," she called, taking the steps two at a time then poking her head into the living room.
Mrs. McGuire glanced up from the photo album she was piecing together. "Yes, Lizzie?"
"I'm going to go to the park, okay?"
Her mom nodded. "That's fine. Just be back before dark."
"I promise."
With that she was out the door and on her way.
The walk to the park wasn't long from the McGuire household. When she reached her destination she breathed a deep sigh of relief and collapsed into a swing. Now she could maybe have a couple of minutes without having Gordo plague her thoughts.
"Hey, Lizzie."
*Ugh. Talk about the bad timing award.*
She forced a smile and stared up at Gordo. "Hey."
He took a seat beside her.
"You're not following me, are you," he joked.
She shook her head. "Is your date over already?" It wasn't but 5 when she left her house.
"Yeah, we went out for lunch."
"Did you have a good time?"
He nodded. "Yeah. Sara's really smart."
"Sara?"
"My date. Sara Green."
"Oh." She cleared her throat and smiled again. "Well, I'm glad you had a good time. Because, you know, that's what I want, above all else. For you to be happy."
Something flickered in his eyes. Something that looked suspiciously like a light bulb coming on.
*Uh oh.*
"I want you to be happy too," he said slowly, cautiously. He was watching her. Taking her in and inspecting her every movement. He caught her eyes and held them.
She fought for breath.
"You're my best friend. Why wouldn't I want you to be happy," she answered, intentionally referring to the conversation they'd had the night of the murder mystery party.
He didn't alter his gaze. "So, you want me to be happy and I want you to be happy. It's all good."
"All systems go," she whispered.
It seemed like an eternity as she waited for some sign, some single of what he was feeling. His expression gave nothing away as he sat there.
Watching.
Then he stood. And reaching out with his right hand, he pulled her to her feet as well.
She ached to say something, but feared it might break the palpable feeling that was growing in the air. Her heart was racing a mile a minute and was so loud she was certain he could hear.
If he did, he gave no indication.
And then, finally, he leaned in to her and she into him, both of their lips aching for the taste of the other's. She could smell his soap, and a cologne that he'd probably borrowed from his dad.
"I should go," Gordo murmured, quickly pulling back before their lips could touch. "It's getting dark."
Lizzie took a deep breath and glanced up at the blazing sun. Sundown wasn't for least another 2 hours. "Me too."
And just like that, he was gone, and she was left there, with nothing but her tears for company.
A/N: Yay, I'm back from the beach. Go me. Ugh, the weather was horrible, but on the bright side, I came up with a plot for Chapter Six. Yay encore! Also, it's a lot longer than some of the other ones, but when you get to the end, you will feel, as I feel, that it was more than worth it. And BTW, sorry it took so long.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"It must be love, the way that I feel.
Something inside, oh, tells me it's for real.
Now I know why, it's you I'm thinking of,
Now I know it must be love."
-Mark, It Must Be Love, California Dreams
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Gordo's on a date? So why are you sitting here, talking to me?" Miranda shrieked over the telephone. From where Lizzie was sitting in her kitchen she could see the street. A dark haired little boy, maybe 5 years old was chasing a blond girl about the same age.
*I hope you catch her, kid. And if ya do, make sure you tell her how you feel NOW before life gets complicated.*
She sighed and twisted the phone cord. "Miranda, what would you have me do? Follow him around, crouching behind bushes and shooting her dirty looks?"
"If that's what it takes!"
"No, Miranda," Lizzie snapped, "I can't do it anymore. I can't stand feeling this way. I'll just shut him out of my life. Never speak to him again. Just sit alone in my room until you get back."
Miranda's voice softened. "And you honestly believe that you can do that? Just forget Gordo? Just forget that you love him?"
Lizzie leapt to her feet, and began unceremoniously wrapping herself in the cord. "That's another thing. We're acting like I love him or something. And THAT is absolutely ridiculous."
"How do you figure?"
"HELLO?! Ever since the fourth grade, when I got a crush on him, my feelings have been hot/cold. One minute he'll be all I can think about and the next I'm chasing after brainless idiots with good hair and Italian guys that I don't even know. How can you love someone and treat them like that?" Her voice dropped as she muttered the last sentence.
"You say your feelings for him run hot/cold. But let me ask you a question. When there was that pool party back when you liked Danny Kessler and you KNEW he was going to be there you CHOSE to stay home and tie dye sheets with Gordo. Why?"
Lizzie froze. "I don't know. It just seemed like it'd be more fun."
"More fun than hanging out with a guy you thought you were head over heels for?"
"Well-"
"And after our marriage project, when I was teasing you about being with Gordo, didn't you tell me, "Best friend equals best marriage?""
"I wasn't speaking specifically about him and me."
"How sure of that are you?"
"Um…"
"Why were you so quick to leap to his rescue when you thought Brook might be using him?"
"He's my friend."
"Lizzie, you wanted me to follow him into the men's room."
"That's not the point…"
"Isn't it? And when you wanted to get a job and you were complaining about it, I was sitting there trying to tell you that there was a Help Wanted sign up right behind you. Why did you only notice when Gordo pointed it out?"
"Uh…."
"And you TOLD me that when you were envisioning your gorgeous husband, he was Gordo. NOT Ethan, but Gordo. What was that about?"
"Um…."
"Why were you so upset about Gordo going to high school, Lizzie?"
"You were upset, too!"
"Yes, but NOT the way you were. You told me you just wished that you could tell him how you felt. What were you feeling, Lizzie?"
"I…dunno. I just missed him."
"And when I went out on the dance floor with Ethan, the guy you were so sure that you were crazy about, and Gordo was dancing with Parker, I saw the look you had. One of sadness and mild jealousy. And it wasn't directed at me and Ethan."
"Do you have a point?"
Miranda sighed. "Yes. Look, the point is that your feelings for Gordo were omnipresent. Not always obvious, but they were there. So if you are so certain that your feelings can't be love on account of them being inconsistent … Then I think you have to find another reason or face up to the truth. That you love David Zephyr Gordon. And that you always have."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Twenty minutes later Lizzie hung up the phone, feeling more confused than before. Not about her feelings. No, those were finally clear-too clear, really, but that was for another time.
No, now she had no idea what to do.
Miranda kept insisting that she should just tell him and be done with it. After all, her dark haired friend had pointed out, he had liked Lizzie before anyone else was in the picture. Maybe all she'd have to do was blurt out that she loved him and he would cast aside whatever feelings he had for this other girl, realizing that SHE was the one he was meant to be with.
*It's possible! I didn't realize I liked him until I knew he like ME.*
But she couldn't do it. Because no matter what, she wasn't in a position to chance their friendship like that. If she was wrong, there would be no way to undo the damage she had caused. She would be out one best friend. And one true love.
She sighed and went upstairs to her room, her own sanctuary. Not exactly the brightest move she'd ever made.
There were reminders all over the room of the one that had touched her heart. There were the tie dyed sheets, folded neatly on her desk. Feeling slightly nostalgic, she found herself taking her new sheets off and replacing them with the ones that made her think of Gordo.
-FLASHBACK-
They were laying on the sheets, his head resting gently against her legs. An thought she wasn't even aware she was having slid it's way into her mind. 'I could do this forever. Just lay here next to him, staring at the sky.'
-END FLASHBACK-
That was one of her favorite memories. It was small, simple, and boy, looking back, it seemed so long ago. But it was still close to her heart.
Who was she kidding? Everywhere she turned, she saw something else that made her feel like her heart was being ripped out. She needed to get out of the house, before the lump that was rising in her throat would make its way to the surface.
"Mom," she called, taking the steps two at a time then poking her head into the living room.
Mrs. McGuire glanced up from the photo album she was piecing together. "Yes, Lizzie?"
"I'm going to go to the park, okay?"
Her mom nodded. "That's fine. Just be back before dark."
"I promise."
With that she was out the door and on her way.
The walk to the park wasn't long from the McGuire household. When she reached her destination she breathed a deep sigh of relief and collapsed into a swing. Now she could maybe have a couple of minutes without having Gordo plague her thoughts.
"Hey, Lizzie."
*Ugh. Talk about the bad timing award.*
She forced a smile and stared up at Gordo. "Hey."
He took a seat beside her.
"You're not following me, are you," he joked.
She shook her head. "Is your date over already?" It wasn't but 5 when she left her house.
"Yeah, we went out for lunch."
"Did you have a good time?"
He nodded. "Yeah. Sara's really smart."
"Sara?"
"My date. Sara Green."
"Oh." She cleared her throat and smiled again. "Well, I'm glad you had a good time. Because, you know, that's what I want, above all else. For you to be happy."
Something flickered in his eyes. Something that looked suspiciously like a light bulb coming on.
*Uh oh.*
"I want you to be happy too," he said slowly, cautiously. He was watching her. Taking her in and inspecting her every movement. He caught her eyes and held them.
She fought for breath.
"You're my best friend. Why wouldn't I want you to be happy," she answered, intentionally referring to the conversation they'd had the night of the murder mystery party.
He didn't alter his gaze. "So, you want me to be happy and I want you to be happy. It's all good."
"All systems go," she whispered.
It seemed like an eternity as she waited for some sign, some single of what he was feeling. His expression gave nothing away as he sat there.
Watching.
Then he stood. And reaching out with his right hand, he pulled her to her feet as well.
She ached to say something, but feared it might break the palpable feeling that was growing in the air. Her heart was racing a mile a minute and was so loud she was certain he could hear.
If he did, he gave no indication.
And then, finally, he leaned in to her and she into him, both of their lips aching for the taste of the other's. She could smell his soap, and a cologne that he'd probably borrowed from his dad.
"I should go," Gordo murmured, quickly pulling back before their lips could touch. "It's getting dark."
Lizzie took a deep breath and glanced up at the blazing sun. Sundown wasn't for least another 2 hours. "Me too."
And just like that, he was gone, and she was left there, with nothing but her tears for company.
