SAILOR SATURN COAST TO COAST
Ano's student project
By PD Wright
I own not this show, so to sue is wasting our time.
On the screen, a young girl. A twity, slightly unlikable girl..
"Hey!!" Said the girl, annoyed.
Sorry.
The scene brightens, revealing Miaka sitting in a large chair, with slight MASTERPIECE
THEATRE ambiance. She is holding a book.
"Hi. Welcome to this edition of Sailor Saturn Coast to Coast. I'm your host, Miaka. And I'll be
bringing you some adventures from this book.."
"Wrong intro, Miaka!" A voice yelled from offstage.
"Oops.. Sorry. What I meant was.. We'll be bringing you some choice selections from the Sailor
Saturn tv show, selected with utmost care and delicacy. Now, sit back as Sailor Saturn interviews
that dashing man in a tuxedo, the very drool-worthy.."
"Miaka!"
"Er.. The very dashing Mamoru Chiba, Sailor Moon's future husband and lover.." she sighed.
"Oh.. That's so romantic.."
The screen fades, fading in on a set. A set, set against a large window, with the planet Saturn in
the background. A desk and monitor sit in the middle. In the seat behind the desk sits Sailor
Saturn, in her much more elegant S-season costume. On the monitor is Mamoru Chiba.
At the side of the stage, right, is a combo of yoma, led on keyboard, by Zoicite, former general
of the Dark Kingdom. The combo is pounding out what amounts to a thrash version of Moon
Light Densetsu, though it's not even that good. Saturn is tilting her head, watching Mamoru
suggestively.
"Hello Kitty.. I mean, why is it called Hello Kitty, when it could be called just Kitty. Or maybe
it's like He-llo Kitty, like that show.."
"Alright, we're back with Mamoru Chiba. Tell us, what's the scoop now?"
"Well, you ever tried to grow throwing roses? I tell ya, Miracle Grow doesn't work on them."
"Umm.."
"Well, we are at the moment on the lookout for new computer lines. Sailor Mercury has been
trying to get her computer upgraded to Crystal Tokyo for windows for ages, but Usagi hasn't
been able to fashion the necessary modules, so.."
"Wow.."
She sighed, looked at her card.
"So, Mamuru, any last words of wisdom for our viewers?" Saturn asked.
"Hotaru, I wanna party with you!" he said, his face crossed with a wicked smile.
"What, with a party cake and all?" she asked, her voice low and suggestive.
"If you like, sure."
"What about Usagi-san and ChibiUsa-chan?"
"Ahh, screw 'em.."
"I'm sure you'd like to.."
"Eventually, sure.. "
"Well.. Let's party then!"
"Mmmm.."
"Alright then."
And she clicked her blue card on the desk.
And, Miaka suddenly appears on screen.
"And so ends another tale in the Sailor Saturn saga. And next, we have Sailor Saturn confounded
by the disturbing antics of a purple-dressed villain. Watch as she gets so flustered, she asks
Wiseman if he has any non-freaks to put in her monitor. Now, sit back, and enjoy, this tale, far in
the future.."
Same set, different show..
A figure in the monitor. A person dressed in purple. His chin is shaped so that it's difficult to tell
what gender the figure is. His outfit resembles, vaugly, a cat.
"Hello, all!" said the figure.
"And just who," Sailor Saturn said, her voice barely betraying her annoyance, "are you supposed
to be?"
"I am the next ruler of the world, head of Galactor.."
"WiseMan!" Sailor Saturn stormed at the monitor, "Have you any non-freaks to put in my
monitor?"
"Well..." Wiseman paused, considering his alternatives, which were none.
"No," he finally said.
"Oh, that's just great," Saturn said, her voice dripping sarcasm.
"Hey, where's Sailor Saturn? Get her now!" said the purple figure in the monitor.
"Oh, shut up," she said, anger filling her cute little voice like clouds.
"Say," the purple figure on the monitor now said, "you know, your less cute on tv.."
"Alright, that does it," she said, bringing her glaive down parallel with the figure on the screen.
Suddenly, the figure flicked, and faded from view.
"So.. Anyone know just WHO that was?" she said, turning to her bishoned bandleader.
"Some poor hermaphrodite, to scared to face the world without a silly mask," commented
Zoicite, brushing his long blond hair from his face with one stroke.
Miaka appeared, her hands clapping in the air.
"We hope you've enjoyed this part of the Sailor Saturn sequence. This is Miaka-chan, saying
we'll be right back..."
As the screen fades to black, she is seen muttering, "I don't see why this sailor suited cow is
so popular.."
Ano's student project
By PD Wright
I own not this show, so to sue is wasting our time.
On the screen, a young girl. A twity, slightly unlikable girl..
"Hey!!" Said the girl, annoyed.
Sorry.
The scene brightens, revealing Miaka sitting in a large chair, with slight MASTERPIECE
THEATRE ambiance. She is holding a book.
"Hi. Welcome to this edition of Sailor Saturn Coast to Coast. I'm your host, Miaka. And I'll be
bringing you some adventures from this book.."
"Wrong intro, Miaka!" A voice yelled from offstage.
"Oops.. Sorry. What I meant was.. We'll be bringing you some choice selections from the Sailor
Saturn tv show, selected with utmost care and delicacy. Now, sit back as Sailor Saturn interviews
that dashing man in a tuxedo, the very drool-worthy.."
"Miaka!"
"Er.. The very dashing Mamoru Chiba, Sailor Moon's future husband and lover.." she sighed.
"Oh.. That's so romantic.."
The screen fades, fading in on a set. A set, set against a large window, with the planet Saturn in
the background. A desk and monitor sit in the middle. In the seat behind the desk sits Sailor
Saturn, in her much more elegant S-season costume. On the monitor is Mamoru Chiba.
At the side of the stage, right, is a combo of yoma, led on keyboard, by Zoicite, former general
of the Dark Kingdom. The combo is pounding out what amounts to a thrash version of Moon
Light Densetsu, though it's not even that good. Saturn is tilting her head, watching Mamoru
suggestively.
"Hello Kitty.. I mean, why is it called Hello Kitty, when it could be called just Kitty. Or maybe
it's like He-llo Kitty, like that show.."
"Alright, we're back with Mamoru Chiba. Tell us, what's the scoop now?"
"Well, you ever tried to grow throwing roses? I tell ya, Miracle Grow doesn't work on them."
"Umm.."
"Well, we are at the moment on the lookout for new computer lines. Sailor Mercury has been
trying to get her computer upgraded to Crystal Tokyo for windows for ages, but Usagi hasn't
been able to fashion the necessary modules, so.."
"Wow.."
She sighed, looked at her card.
"So, Mamuru, any last words of wisdom for our viewers?" Saturn asked.
"Hotaru, I wanna party with you!" he said, his face crossed with a wicked smile.
"What, with a party cake and all?" she asked, her voice low and suggestive.
"If you like, sure."
"What about Usagi-san and ChibiUsa-chan?"
"Ahh, screw 'em.."
"I'm sure you'd like to.."
"Eventually, sure.. "
"Well.. Let's party then!"
"Mmmm.."
"Alright then."
And she clicked her blue card on the desk.
And, Miaka suddenly appears on screen.
"And so ends another tale in the Sailor Saturn saga. And next, we have Sailor Saturn confounded
by the disturbing antics of a purple-dressed villain. Watch as she gets so flustered, she asks
Wiseman if he has any non-freaks to put in her monitor. Now, sit back, and enjoy, this tale, far in
the future.."
Same set, different show..
A figure in the monitor. A person dressed in purple. His chin is shaped so that it's difficult to tell
what gender the figure is. His outfit resembles, vaugly, a cat.
"Hello, all!" said the figure.
"And just who," Sailor Saturn said, her voice barely betraying her annoyance, "are you supposed
to be?"
"I am the next ruler of the world, head of Galactor.."
"WiseMan!" Sailor Saturn stormed at the monitor, "Have you any non-freaks to put in my
monitor?"
"Well..." Wiseman paused, considering his alternatives, which were none.
"No," he finally said.
"Oh, that's just great," Saturn said, her voice dripping sarcasm.
"Hey, where's Sailor Saturn? Get her now!" said the purple figure in the monitor.
"Oh, shut up," she said, anger filling her cute little voice like clouds.
"Say," the purple figure on the monitor now said, "you know, your less cute on tv.."
"Alright, that does it," she said, bringing her glaive down parallel with the figure on the screen.
Suddenly, the figure flicked, and faded from view.
"So.. Anyone know just WHO that was?" she said, turning to her bishoned bandleader.
"Some poor hermaphrodite, to scared to face the world without a silly mask," commented
Zoicite, brushing his long blond hair from his face with one stroke.
Miaka appeared, her hands clapping in the air.
"We hope you've enjoyed this part of the Sailor Saturn sequence. This is Miaka-chan, saying
we'll be right back..."
As the screen fades to black, she is seen muttering, "I don't see why this sailor suited cow is
so popular.."
