Self Esteem

Written by RavenZERO

This is just a vid-fic I came up with out of nowhere (I'm stuck at home 'cause I've got a fever, but I guess I needed a day off anyway.  Anyway, this is all about our favorite (gag) blonde-haired warrior, Bit Cloud!  Anyway, on with the fic!

[Video directions]

"Speech"

(Song lyrics)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

( ((Drunkenly)):La la la la la lalala…)

[Opening guitar riff begins, and we fade in on Bit Cloud, pacing back and forth nervously in a drab and old looking apartment.  He seems to be reciting something over and over again, but we can't hear what he is saying]

(I wrote her off for the tenth time of day,

Practiced all the things I would say…)

[A knock on the front door is heard, and Bit opens it.  There is a girl, sandy blonde hair, and green eyes, dressed in jeans and a black T-shirt. She looks at him with a quizzical expression]

"Bit, what's the matter?"

(She came over; I lost my nerve,

I took her back and made her dessert…)

[Cut to scene of her and Bit lying in his bed. The girl (lets call her Jessica) is asleep, and Bit is still awake, staring up toward the ceiling)

(I know I'm bein' used,

That's okay man, 'cause I like the abuse!

I know she's playin' with me,

That's okay 'cause I got no self-esteem!)

[Bit is still awake in his bed, and decides to get up, and walk around outside for an hour or two]

(Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH! Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH!)

[He walks back into the apartment an hour later, and finds Jessica awake and dressed.  They talk, and she leaves with a smile on her face.]

(We make plans, to go out a night,

I wait 'till 2, then I turn out the light…)

[Bit goes back to sleep, and wakes up a few hours later. He dials a number on the phone, and we see him talking with a happy expression, but his eyes show different…]

(All this rejection's got me so low,

If she keeps it up I just might tell her so…

Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH! Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH!)

[Bit stares at a picture of him and Jessica, at the beach, both of them smiling happily, for what seems like an eternity, then scowls at it, and slams it to the ground and shatters the glass frame into millions of tiny pieces.]

(When she's sayin' she wants only me,

Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends.

When she's sayin' that I'm like a disease,

Then I wonder how much more I can spend.

Well I guess, I should stick up for myself,

But I really think its better this way…)

[Bit shuffles into his bedroom, and collapses on his bed, and starts to cry…]

(The more you suffer,

The more it shows you really care…

Right?)

(Now I'll relate this little bit,

Happens more than I'd like to admit…)

[A knock is heard on the door suddenly, and he wipes away his tears, and walks to the door. He opens it, and it is Jessica, her face red, and her clothes ruffled.  Bit's nose twinges at the scent of alcohol.]

"You okay, Jess?"

[She almost passes out from how drunk she is, and pleads with Bit to do something…]

(Late at night, she knocks on my door,

Drunk again, and lookin' to score…)

(Now I know, I should say no,

But that's kinda hard when she's ready to go!

I may be dumb, but I'm not a dweeb,

I'm just a sucker with no self-esteem!)

[Bit swallows a lump in his throat, and picks her up by the shoulders gently, and helps her into the bedroom.  The door slams shut behind them…]

(Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH! Oh yeah! Yeah! Oh yeah! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH!)

[Cut to scene of Bit and Jessica lying in bed together.  Jessica is asleep, with her arms wrapped around Bit, who is still awake and staring up into the ceiling with his hands folded behind his head.]

(When she's sayin' she wants only me,

Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends.

When she's sayin' that I'm like a disease,

Then I wonder how much more I can spend.

Well I guess, I should stick up for myself,

But I really think its better this way…)

[Bit looks at another picture of him and Jessica at an Offspring concert on his dresser, and picks it up.  He stares at it, remembering that day, as if it were yesterday…then he shakes his head in doubt.]

(The more you suffer,

The more it shows you really care,

Right?)

[He throws the picture of them at the concert into the nearby trash can, and turns over to go to sleep, gently moving her arm off him, taking one last look at her before he goes off into peaceful slumber…]

Well, that's all! For once, another serious fic by me! (Very rare, so enjoy them while you still can!)  Please, don't forget to review! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE???