A/N: HELLO! It is 1:12 in the morning, and we just posted chappie 1! SO HERE'S CHAPPIE 2!

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Announcer dude: Previously on The Absolutely Nothing Show!

*Flashback thing*

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Autty: Are you a virgin?

CTM: *coughs on smoke violently*

Autty: ^-^ Heeheeheehee..

Pip: YOU'RE KILLING HIM!!!!!!!!!! *Gives Creepy Thin Man CPR*

Angie: Ew..

Autty: No fair!

Pip: Why did you need to know that?

Autty: Oh, no reason. *shifty eyes*

Angie: You saved his life and he's not able to say thank you.

Autty: YES HE CAN! *Starts beating on Creepy Thin Man with his own cane (ooooooh, think about the irony..)*

Pip: AAAAAAH! NO!!!!!!!!!

Dylan: I'm a leprechaun..

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Announcer Dude: And now back to, ooh, cake! *Begins eating cake.*

Autty: *attempting to beat words out of Creepy Thin Man*

Pip: *Trying to get her off him*

Angie: *Staring in awe at the fact that she befriended them*

Bos: *Playing fight music on violin* *switches to playing Harry Potter music*

CTM: GET OFF ME ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!

All: *freeze* O.O *gasp*

Angie: He. spoke..

Pip: He has a sexy voice..

Autumn: I know..

Pip: What the hell is wrong with you? You tried to kill him!

Autumn: I did?

Angie: She has split personalities..

Pip: Well, poop.

CTM: *covers mouth*

Angie: No, too late.

CTM: *Shakes head* No it's not. AH! *covers mouth*

Nat: Hey look, he said something!!!!!!!!!!

CTM: Uh.. *runs and takes a handful of Autumn's hair*

Autty: HEY! My hair is just as short as yours is and I don't wanna look like her! *Points to Dylan*

Dylan: CHARLIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *runs away crying for Charlie*

Alex: I'M ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!

Bos: *throws violin at her*

Alex: *Out for the count*

Autty: *Attacks Creepy Thin Man*

CTM: *Does that weird scream*

Autty: Heeheeheehee, you scream like a girl..

Pip: You're mean.

Autumn: Oh, but you're so adorable!

Angie: Does she hate him or love him?

Pip: I dunno, but she can't have him! HE'S MINE!!!!!!!!!!

Frodo and Merry: *walk in*

Pip: HE'S MINE!

Autumn: MINE!

Frodo and Merry: *gasp like Doc from Back to the Future* CHEATERS!!!!!!!!!!

Pip and Autumn: Uh, um.. We're not cheating on you..

CTM: *rolling on the floor laughing* YES THEY ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Merry: Woah, he can talk?

Frodo: EXCELLENT! ((Thank you Anakin))

Pippin: Remember the witch and Hobbit in bed thing?

All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!

CTM: *chases them of stage* *comes back smiling*

Pip & Autumn: He's pretty..

Autty: AH! *Beats CTM with cane*

Vivian: *comes on and kicks Autty*

Autty: *disappears in trap door on stage* *appears behind Vivian* *Pokes her in the head*

Viv: Ow..

Elijah Wood: *Walks on stage* *looks at Vivian* MOMMY!!!!!!!!!! *runs to Viv*

Viv: *shoots him*

Elijah: *falls on floor* *pops back up* MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!

Viv: *Shoots again*

Elijah: *falls on floor* *pops back up* MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!

Viv: *shoots again*

Elijah: *falls on floor* *pops back up* MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!

Viv: *shoots again*

Elijah: *falls on floor* *pops back up* MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!

Viv: *shoots again*

Elijah: *dies*

::1-foot-tall The Chad comes in with a giant novelty broom with a 'Firebolt' logo on the handle and cleans up Elijah's dead, bloody corpse*

Pip: OK, that was strange..

Angie: *Holds up 'O.O' sign*

Audience: *O.O* (I wonder why..)

Autty: Um, let's ask a question. Vivian, how old are you?

Pip: *Begins choking Autty* WILL YOU STOP WITH THE FLIPPING HOW OLD QUESTIONS!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

CTM: Ooh, lemme help! *hits Autty with cane (THINK ABOUT THE IRONY!!!!!!!!!!)*

Angie: That's not cool..

Bos: I need to get some food.. *runs Viv over with Jeep on the way out*

The Chad: *cleans her up*

Autty: Two Wood's down, seven to go.

Angie: Who?

Autty: Marty Wood, Clarence Wood, Michael Wood, Emmett Wood, Clara Wood, Jules Wood, Verne Wood! ^-^

Pip: Interesting hit list..

Autty: And Creepy Thin Man Wood!

CTM: My last name is not Wood!!!!!!!!!!

Pip: What is your name, anyway?

CTM: *smokes*

Pip: COME ON!!!!!!!!!!

CTM: ALL RIGHT!!!!!!!!!! My name is Crispin Glover.

All: *freeze*

Pip: Ooooooooooooh, crispy!

Autumn: YAY!

Angie: Right..

Dylan: *head pops on stage* I'm the Easter Bunny.

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A/N: Right, that was strange. It is now 1:50. I think we should go to bed. In the next chapter of.

THE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING SHOW!!!!!!!!!!

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