Disclaimer: Slam Dunk does not and will never belong to me. However, this plot belongs to me. If anyone dares to duplicate Cruel, be it rename it or change the characters' names and make it your own, be ready to get a letter from my lawyer.
Cruel -- Chapter 18: Alone
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Dawn was breaking. Sunlight peeked through the paper window. I winced. I scanned the place for some clues about where I am. I remember committing suicide then all went dark. Just what happened? I sat up on the piles of straws that I had been lying on.
"D'ho, you're finally awake." The voice is very familiar. I squinted my eyes. It was Rukawa. I tried to say something but my mouth was too dry.
"Sakuragi. Is it really worth killing yourself over a girl? Girls are everywhere but you only have one life. You trained so hard in your arts all your life for what? To end your life over a girl? You fought so hard in all your duels to keep your life and kill your opponents for what? To kill yourself over a girl? It's really not worth it. You are a top assassin. If the Martial Arts world knows that you actually attempted suicide over a girl, what would they say? It's a big joke. Get over it and go on with your assassin life. Forget Haruko." Master appeared from the door and said. For the first time I see Master without his usual mask. He looks really intimidating. Dark-tanned and tall. "If you're also wondering what's my real name, my name is Takenori Akagi. However, I'm not related to Haruko at all. As for Rukawa, he's... Rukawa, I leave it to you whether you want to tell Sakuragi your real identity." Master continued.
"I'm not an assassin. I'm just staying with your Master to recuperate." Short and simple, Rukawa's style.
"Stop mentioning the fact that I'm an assassin! I hate being an assassin! I really hate it! Why am I an assassin? Why?! Haruko means so much to me yet she left me because I'm an assassin! I hate myself! Why didn't you let me die? Living on is such a torment. Without Haruko, life is empty." With that I reached for my sword and send it straight at my throat. Suddenly my whole body went numb, I dropped the sword harmlessly. Rukawa had blocked my accupoints just before I could kill myself.
"D'ho! Is it worth it? You are crazy!" Rukawa chided.
"Precisely. If a girl just come and leave you as and when she like it, she's not serious about you at all. If you kill yourself over such a girl, it's plain stupidity. I say, Rukawa, why don't you just let this d'ho kill himself? He's so stupid to kill himself over someone who cheated his feelings! If you want to kill yourself each and everytime you get jilted, you would have died 50 times already. Haruko is just making use of your feelings. She's not serious about you at all! All she want was just someone to be nice to her, to dote on her, after which she grew tired and decide to leave you, that's all! To say that she's scared of being with a killer is just but a lie that she made up..." Master said.
"Stop it! I don't want to listen to you! You are lying. Haruko is serious about me. She loves me. Otherwise why would she spend a night with me together? Why would she cry when I was mean to her? Why would she allow me to kiss her and why would she kiss me? Why? Stop insulting her, she's serious about me. She just can't accept the fact that I'm a killer at one go. She's really serious about me!" I said agitatedly. Deep down inside, I'm really scared that Master is right.
"She spent a night with you? Well, did you do anything with her? No I suppose. She probably wouldn't allow that to happen either. She spend the night with you only because she needs protection after Rukawe tried to rape her. She knew she could count on you. Nothing more than that." Rukawa said coldly.
"Rukawa is right. As for the rest, I really have got no explanation for it. If you really want to know, ask her. You have a right to know everything. And one more thing, would a girl actually like a guy two years younger than herself?" Master said. I feel really upset. Could Master and Rukawa be right? I remained silent. I did not want to argue anymore. I hope that Master and Rukawa are wrong about Haruko but I can't help but feel scared...
I went back to school after I recovered. I did not see Haruko at all. In fact, I was scared of seeing her. I do not want to know the truth. The truth means so much to me yet I'm so fearful of it. I did not bother to look for her, she came.
"Sakuragi. Take this back." She gave me the silver ring that I gave her at the beginning of this year. Now I know everything is over. Master and Rukawa are right. Haruko is just a dream. I have to wake up from this dream.
"I'm sorry. But I can't be with a killer. I love you but I do not want to live in fear everyday. I want security. I want a normal guy to be with me instead of one who kills and get killers at his back all the time. The last time I was held hostage was a great example. I can't lead a normal life this way. I'm sorry. I really love you but I can't..." Haruko cried.
"I can quit being an assassin. As long as you want me to, I'll quit. Haruko I love you. I can't do without you." I pleaded and held on tightly to her hand.
"I know you won't quit being an assassin. I know you well enough. Even if you quit, we can't be together. I really don't want to be with someone who had his hands stained with so much blood. I'll get nightmares. I don't want to have sleepless nights. Really. Let go of me. It's over between us." Haruko said as she pushed away my hand.
"Haruko... I really love you. I'll give up on anything you want to give up on. That includes my career as an assassin. I can lead a normal life with you. Anything, as long as you want me to, I'll do it. Please. We can revive our love..." I pleaded.
"I told you. I can't live with a killer, be it an ex-killer or a current killer. No. I'm sure you can find someone better than me and who will accept you as a killer. I can't. Really. I'm serious. No. And besides, I don't love you as much as I really used to. Not after my close brush with death. I realise that life is much more important than love. I can always get another love, but life I only have one. I'm sorry." Haruko said coldly. I could tell that her mind is set and that nothing I say will change it.
"Haruko... Please... Don't do this to me..." I pleaded. I knew that it won't make any difference.
"Sakuragi. I'm serious. Another thing is that from what I see now, you love me much more than I love you, it's unfair to you for me to carry on this relationship. It's better that we end right now. Save each other further heartache." Haruko said.
"You say its unfair to me for you to carry on this relationship, then do you think its fair for you to end it without asking me what I truly want? Haruko, you are not that heartless, do you remember all the times that we kiss and everything else? What about that night at my house when we spent the night together?" I pleaded.
"Certain things after we did it should be forgotten as soon as we begin on it. That's how all our kisses should be. We spent the night together. That was only because I need protection after almost being rape by that Rukawe. The fact that you are being so persistent makes things uglier. Yes I love you but if you are so persistent, you'll make me hate you. I don't want to hate you and I know you wouldn't want me to hate you either. Let's just take it that we're waking up from a sweet dream. After waking up from it, we should forget it or put it behind." Haruko said.
"So all along you're making use of me? All along I'm just your fool? Haruko, I know you're lying. Someone must have forced you to end our relationship right? Tell me please." I was on the verge of breaking down.
"NO! Sakuragi. Stop it. It's over. I don't see why I'm wasting my time talking to you here. You obviously don't get my point. I did loved you once but it's all over now. I can't be with a killer. I want a normal life. Let's not make things uglier. Bye." Haruko turned and leave. I held her back.
"Haruko... Don't leave me please. You are being unfair to me. You say its unfair to me for you to carry on this relationship, then do you think its fair for you to end it without asking me what I truly want? Haruko, please stay. I'll do anything you want me to. As long as you stay with me. Please..." I pleaded.
"How many times must I repeat myself? No. I did loved you but I find that I can't love a killer. Not after how I saw you kill two person brutally before my eyes. Not after I had a close brush with death. I'm sorry. The thing is I don't love you as much as you love me. At least not now. Maybe in the past I do love you alot more than you love me but not now. You say I don't consider what you want. You don't consider what I want either. I want out. I can't love a killer. I'm sorry. Bye." Haruko pushed away my hand and tiptoed to kiss me. I held her tightly in my arms. We kissed for a rather long time then we stopped. It's over.
"Sakuragi, I did really loved you. I still love you but I really can't love a killer. I'll never forget you. Neither will I ever forget all the times we kiss and everything about you. You had been a pleasant surprise in my life for as long as it lasts. I'm sorry." With that, Haruko turned and walked away. I could see tears in her eyes...
This time around, I did not hold her back. It's pointless. I tried to fight back my tears but I can't. Crystalline liquid found its way out of my eyes. I turned and walked away. A killer is destined to be alone... This is the cruel reality.
~The End~
I find that I'm really tired of writing this fic. Besides my school work are piling up. This was the planned ending that I had in mind. Hope that you had enjoyed reading this fic. Anyone unhappy with this ending, pls email me at radicasion87@hotmail.com or state so in your review. Thanks. The story may be altered if there are alot of readers out there who want a different ending. That's it. Bye.
Cruel -- Chapter 18: Alone
--------------------------
Dawn was breaking. Sunlight peeked through the paper window. I winced. I scanned the place for some clues about where I am. I remember committing suicide then all went dark. Just what happened? I sat up on the piles of straws that I had been lying on.
"D'ho, you're finally awake." The voice is very familiar. I squinted my eyes. It was Rukawa. I tried to say something but my mouth was too dry.
"Sakuragi. Is it really worth killing yourself over a girl? Girls are everywhere but you only have one life. You trained so hard in your arts all your life for what? To end your life over a girl? You fought so hard in all your duels to keep your life and kill your opponents for what? To kill yourself over a girl? It's really not worth it. You are a top assassin. If the Martial Arts world knows that you actually attempted suicide over a girl, what would they say? It's a big joke. Get over it and go on with your assassin life. Forget Haruko." Master appeared from the door and said. For the first time I see Master without his usual mask. He looks really intimidating. Dark-tanned and tall. "If you're also wondering what's my real name, my name is Takenori Akagi. However, I'm not related to Haruko at all. As for Rukawa, he's... Rukawa, I leave it to you whether you want to tell Sakuragi your real identity." Master continued.
"I'm not an assassin. I'm just staying with your Master to recuperate." Short and simple, Rukawa's style.
"Stop mentioning the fact that I'm an assassin! I hate being an assassin! I really hate it! Why am I an assassin? Why?! Haruko means so much to me yet she left me because I'm an assassin! I hate myself! Why didn't you let me die? Living on is such a torment. Without Haruko, life is empty." With that I reached for my sword and send it straight at my throat. Suddenly my whole body went numb, I dropped the sword harmlessly. Rukawa had blocked my accupoints just before I could kill myself.
"D'ho! Is it worth it? You are crazy!" Rukawa chided.
"Precisely. If a girl just come and leave you as and when she like it, she's not serious about you at all. If you kill yourself over such a girl, it's plain stupidity. I say, Rukawa, why don't you just let this d'ho kill himself? He's so stupid to kill himself over someone who cheated his feelings! If you want to kill yourself each and everytime you get jilted, you would have died 50 times already. Haruko is just making use of your feelings. She's not serious about you at all! All she want was just someone to be nice to her, to dote on her, after which she grew tired and decide to leave you, that's all! To say that she's scared of being with a killer is just but a lie that she made up..." Master said.
"Stop it! I don't want to listen to you! You are lying. Haruko is serious about me. She loves me. Otherwise why would she spend a night with me together? Why would she cry when I was mean to her? Why would she allow me to kiss her and why would she kiss me? Why? Stop insulting her, she's serious about me. She just can't accept the fact that I'm a killer at one go. She's really serious about me!" I said agitatedly. Deep down inside, I'm really scared that Master is right.
"She spent a night with you? Well, did you do anything with her? No I suppose. She probably wouldn't allow that to happen either. She spend the night with you only because she needs protection after Rukawe tried to rape her. She knew she could count on you. Nothing more than that." Rukawa said coldly.
"Rukawa is right. As for the rest, I really have got no explanation for it. If you really want to know, ask her. You have a right to know everything. And one more thing, would a girl actually like a guy two years younger than herself?" Master said. I feel really upset. Could Master and Rukawa be right? I remained silent. I did not want to argue anymore. I hope that Master and Rukawa are wrong about Haruko but I can't help but feel scared...
I went back to school after I recovered. I did not see Haruko at all. In fact, I was scared of seeing her. I do not want to know the truth. The truth means so much to me yet I'm so fearful of it. I did not bother to look for her, she came.
"Sakuragi. Take this back." She gave me the silver ring that I gave her at the beginning of this year. Now I know everything is over. Master and Rukawa are right. Haruko is just a dream. I have to wake up from this dream.
"I'm sorry. But I can't be with a killer. I love you but I do not want to live in fear everyday. I want security. I want a normal guy to be with me instead of one who kills and get killers at his back all the time. The last time I was held hostage was a great example. I can't lead a normal life this way. I'm sorry. I really love you but I can't..." Haruko cried.
"I can quit being an assassin. As long as you want me to, I'll quit. Haruko I love you. I can't do without you." I pleaded and held on tightly to her hand.
"I know you won't quit being an assassin. I know you well enough. Even if you quit, we can't be together. I really don't want to be with someone who had his hands stained with so much blood. I'll get nightmares. I don't want to have sleepless nights. Really. Let go of me. It's over between us." Haruko said as she pushed away my hand.
"Haruko... I really love you. I'll give up on anything you want to give up on. That includes my career as an assassin. I can lead a normal life with you. Anything, as long as you want me to, I'll do it. Please. We can revive our love..." I pleaded.
"I told you. I can't live with a killer, be it an ex-killer or a current killer. No. I'm sure you can find someone better than me and who will accept you as a killer. I can't. Really. I'm serious. No. And besides, I don't love you as much as I really used to. Not after my close brush with death. I realise that life is much more important than love. I can always get another love, but life I only have one. I'm sorry." Haruko said coldly. I could tell that her mind is set and that nothing I say will change it.
"Haruko... Please... Don't do this to me..." I pleaded. I knew that it won't make any difference.
"Sakuragi. I'm serious. Another thing is that from what I see now, you love me much more than I love you, it's unfair to you for me to carry on this relationship. It's better that we end right now. Save each other further heartache." Haruko said.
"You say its unfair to me for you to carry on this relationship, then do you think its fair for you to end it without asking me what I truly want? Haruko, you are not that heartless, do you remember all the times that we kiss and everything else? What about that night at my house when we spent the night together?" I pleaded.
"Certain things after we did it should be forgotten as soon as we begin on it. That's how all our kisses should be. We spent the night together. That was only because I need protection after almost being rape by that Rukawe. The fact that you are being so persistent makes things uglier. Yes I love you but if you are so persistent, you'll make me hate you. I don't want to hate you and I know you wouldn't want me to hate you either. Let's just take it that we're waking up from a sweet dream. After waking up from it, we should forget it or put it behind." Haruko said.
"So all along you're making use of me? All along I'm just your fool? Haruko, I know you're lying. Someone must have forced you to end our relationship right? Tell me please." I was on the verge of breaking down.
"NO! Sakuragi. Stop it. It's over. I don't see why I'm wasting my time talking to you here. You obviously don't get my point. I did loved you once but it's all over now. I can't be with a killer. I want a normal life. Let's not make things uglier. Bye." Haruko turned and leave. I held her back.
"Haruko... Don't leave me please. You are being unfair to me. You say its unfair to me for you to carry on this relationship, then do you think its fair for you to end it without asking me what I truly want? Haruko, please stay. I'll do anything you want me to. As long as you stay with me. Please..." I pleaded.
"How many times must I repeat myself? No. I did loved you but I find that I can't love a killer. Not after how I saw you kill two person brutally before my eyes. Not after I had a close brush with death. I'm sorry. The thing is I don't love you as much as you love me. At least not now. Maybe in the past I do love you alot more than you love me but not now. You say I don't consider what you want. You don't consider what I want either. I want out. I can't love a killer. I'm sorry. Bye." Haruko pushed away my hand and tiptoed to kiss me. I held her tightly in my arms. We kissed for a rather long time then we stopped. It's over.
"Sakuragi, I did really loved you. I still love you but I really can't love a killer. I'll never forget you. Neither will I ever forget all the times we kiss and everything about you. You had been a pleasant surprise in my life for as long as it lasts. I'm sorry." With that, Haruko turned and walked away. I could see tears in her eyes...
This time around, I did not hold her back. It's pointless. I tried to fight back my tears but I can't. Crystalline liquid found its way out of my eyes. I turned and walked away. A killer is destined to be alone... This is the cruel reality.
~The End~
I find that I'm really tired of writing this fic. Besides my school work are piling up. This was the planned ending that I had in mind. Hope that you had enjoyed reading this fic. Anyone unhappy with this ending, pls email me at radicasion87@hotmail.com or state so in your review. Thanks. The story may be altered if there are alot of readers out there who want a different ending. That's it. Bye.