Crookshanks to the rescue
***
' Hey, Mister, why you cryin'??' Pig suddenly chirped. ' Gyah! Don't do that you little feather ball!! And I'm not crying!' I exclaimed angrily. I hated being surprised. Maybe Ron won't mind if I eat him. ' Then, what are you doing??' he asked crossing his wings over his chest. ' Getting dust out of my eye.' I replied crisply, knowing he would buy it since he's kind of, okay, VERY, dumb.
' Really??' he asked wide-eyed. ' Duh. Adults don't cry kid.' I muttered staring at the poem Ron supposedly wrote. He then stared at me weirdly. ' You're an adult??' He's lucky you can't imprison a minor. ' Uh, yes??' ' Oh.'
' Anyway, you SURE Ron wrote this poem??' I asked changing the subject about my age. He nodded promptly as a reply. ' Yup.' He added. ' Sure kid??' I asked to make sure because Ron might have just plagiarized this poem off some book his mom owned. ' Yeah Mister.' He said. ' Didn't plagiarize??' ' What's that??' ' Never mind.'
Judging from the tone of his voice, innocent and air headed as usual, he must be confident that Ron DIDN'T copy the poem. Oh my God.
' Geez man! I didn't know he could be such a poet laureate!' I exclaimed in surprise and fascination. ' What's a poo-et looriate??' Pig chirped. ' Someone who writes very good poems.' You gotta keep things simple when explaining to dumb kids like Pig. ' I see.'
Okay, I can officially conclude that Ron likes Hermione. They're cute together. If they get married, Ron might like me! If they DO get married, I'll be related to Pig. NOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Oh well, some sacrifices are worth the world right?? Right??? I think I'm going insane.
Right then, I got my gears working together to think up of a brilliant plan to brilliantly unite Ron and Hermione together because I have a brilliant brain. To get the plan, I began to reflect and remember all the romantic movies I saw, they all had plots that brought two people together. Hey! I'm not saying I WATCH them, uh, Hermione does!! I just sneak a peek when I'm deathly bored.
Hmm, maybe, Hermione can be a courtesan like Satine, and Ron can be a love- struck writer and Harry can be the evil scary guy with the top hat!!! Nah, too complicated, besides, where am I going to get a windmill at this time?? Maybe, Hermione can become a maid in a hotel and Ron can be a famous person guy thingy. Nope, kids aren't allowed to do labor. Arg! Think Crookshanks! Think! You're a genius! You can figure out a simple plan to bring two kids together, you can do this! I will survive!
.
Nothing. Darn. Where's Snuffles when you need the big hairy beast??
Okay, maybe I can get them together in a more simple way, like they give each other gifts! Yeah! Okay, I know what Hermione can give Ron, but what can he give her?? I decided to ask the only person I knew could help.
***
' Hedwig!!!!!!' I yelled at the tower of owls. I waited for her to come out, I had to ask her something. After what seemed like minutes, or forever!!!! Females, always late, she came out through the window, looking quite irritated.
' Crookshanks?? What do you want???' she demanded angrily before she gave out a big yawn. 'I was enjoying my beauty sleep.' She muttered rubbing her eyes with a wing. Thank God Pig's not here since I locked him up in the chest again.
' Okay, Hed, I need to ask you something, just a quickie.' I said. ' Sure, whatever." She muttered yawning again. ' Well, what's your question Crook??' she asked. Okay, what is my question again?? Oh yeah, ' What do girls like??' ' Why are you asking??' ' No reason.' I shrugged.
Okay, since I didn't know what girls like, I decided to ask one. I couldn't ask Mrs. Norris since she's mean and nasty to me. Errol says she likes me. EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
' Well,' Hedwig began thoughtfully. ' Girls like cute and sweet things, like bunnies and stuff like that. They also like anything involving their looks, like make-up, clothes, you name it. They also enjoy talking about boys, fashion, etc. That's why you often see them buying those magazines.' ' Wait, how do you know this stuff?? You're not even owned by a muggle!' I asked. Sure, it sounded weird, I mean, how could she know all this stuff if she's not even muggle-owned??
Hedwig gave me a sly smile and simply replied with a small flap of her wings, ' I've been around the world kid, I've seen a lot of stuff.' Kid?? I ain't no kid!!! Okay, she's only a year or two older than me, but it still doesn't give her the right to call me such, I'm supposed to call Pig that! ' I'm not a kid.' I protested pouting. ' Sure you're not.' She rolled her eyes.
Okay, I gotta get outta here, I don't wanna feel so young anymore. I gave a sharp nod, before walking off, my feet, er, paws sinking slightly in the soft snow. ' One more thing!!' she yelled as she headed back to the owlery tower. ' Girls like jewels!!!!'
Girls like jewels huh??
Heh, I thinks I gots a plan to bring these two crazy kids together..
*** TBC
***
' Hey, Mister, why you cryin'??' Pig suddenly chirped. ' Gyah! Don't do that you little feather ball!! And I'm not crying!' I exclaimed angrily. I hated being surprised. Maybe Ron won't mind if I eat him. ' Then, what are you doing??' he asked crossing his wings over his chest. ' Getting dust out of my eye.' I replied crisply, knowing he would buy it since he's kind of, okay, VERY, dumb.
' Really??' he asked wide-eyed. ' Duh. Adults don't cry kid.' I muttered staring at the poem Ron supposedly wrote. He then stared at me weirdly. ' You're an adult??' He's lucky you can't imprison a minor. ' Uh, yes??' ' Oh.'
' Anyway, you SURE Ron wrote this poem??' I asked changing the subject about my age. He nodded promptly as a reply. ' Yup.' He added. ' Sure kid??' I asked to make sure because Ron might have just plagiarized this poem off some book his mom owned. ' Yeah Mister.' He said. ' Didn't plagiarize??' ' What's that??' ' Never mind.'
Judging from the tone of his voice, innocent and air headed as usual, he must be confident that Ron DIDN'T copy the poem. Oh my God.
' Geez man! I didn't know he could be such a poet laureate!' I exclaimed in surprise and fascination. ' What's a poo-et looriate??' Pig chirped. ' Someone who writes very good poems.' You gotta keep things simple when explaining to dumb kids like Pig. ' I see.'
Okay, I can officially conclude that Ron likes Hermione. They're cute together. If they get married, Ron might like me! If they DO get married, I'll be related to Pig. NOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Oh well, some sacrifices are worth the world right?? Right??? I think I'm going insane.
Right then, I got my gears working together to think up of a brilliant plan to brilliantly unite Ron and Hermione together because I have a brilliant brain. To get the plan, I began to reflect and remember all the romantic movies I saw, they all had plots that brought two people together. Hey! I'm not saying I WATCH them, uh, Hermione does!! I just sneak a peek when I'm deathly bored.
Hmm, maybe, Hermione can be a courtesan like Satine, and Ron can be a love- struck writer and Harry can be the evil scary guy with the top hat!!! Nah, too complicated, besides, where am I going to get a windmill at this time?? Maybe, Hermione can become a maid in a hotel and Ron can be a famous person guy thingy. Nope, kids aren't allowed to do labor. Arg! Think Crookshanks! Think! You're a genius! You can figure out a simple plan to bring two kids together, you can do this! I will survive!
.
Nothing. Darn. Where's Snuffles when you need the big hairy beast??
Okay, maybe I can get them together in a more simple way, like they give each other gifts! Yeah! Okay, I know what Hermione can give Ron, but what can he give her?? I decided to ask the only person I knew could help.
***
' Hedwig!!!!!!' I yelled at the tower of owls. I waited for her to come out, I had to ask her something. After what seemed like minutes, or forever!!!! Females, always late, she came out through the window, looking quite irritated.
' Crookshanks?? What do you want???' she demanded angrily before she gave out a big yawn. 'I was enjoying my beauty sleep.' She muttered rubbing her eyes with a wing. Thank God Pig's not here since I locked him up in the chest again.
' Okay, Hed, I need to ask you something, just a quickie.' I said. ' Sure, whatever." She muttered yawning again. ' Well, what's your question Crook??' she asked. Okay, what is my question again?? Oh yeah, ' What do girls like??' ' Why are you asking??' ' No reason.' I shrugged.
Okay, since I didn't know what girls like, I decided to ask one. I couldn't ask Mrs. Norris since she's mean and nasty to me. Errol says she likes me. EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
' Well,' Hedwig began thoughtfully. ' Girls like cute and sweet things, like bunnies and stuff like that. They also like anything involving their looks, like make-up, clothes, you name it. They also enjoy talking about boys, fashion, etc. That's why you often see them buying those magazines.' ' Wait, how do you know this stuff?? You're not even owned by a muggle!' I asked. Sure, it sounded weird, I mean, how could she know all this stuff if she's not even muggle-owned??
Hedwig gave me a sly smile and simply replied with a small flap of her wings, ' I've been around the world kid, I've seen a lot of stuff.' Kid?? I ain't no kid!!! Okay, she's only a year or two older than me, but it still doesn't give her the right to call me such, I'm supposed to call Pig that! ' I'm not a kid.' I protested pouting. ' Sure you're not.' She rolled her eyes.
Okay, I gotta get outta here, I don't wanna feel so young anymore. I gave a sharp nod, before walking off, my feet, er, paws sinking slightly in the soft snow. ' One more thing!!' she yelled as she headed back to the owlery tower. ' Girls like jewels!!!!'
Girls like jewels huh??
Heh, I thinks I gots a plan to bring these two crazy kids together..
*** TBC