Pineapples, Playboy and Pez
By: Irish Foxxie
No, I still don't own Star Wars or anything else in this, but I'm working on it!
Ok, first off, I'm sorry for taking so long on this chapter, it's not even that good, but I promise you the next one will be at least close to funny. It's really hard for me to work on fics now that school started, but dun worry, I still do as much as I can each day! ^_~ Oh!!! And sorry for my constant use of cussing... it just kinda comes out, ya know.
Ch.2 Jetpacks and Jango Fruit
Anakin: Man, I can't believe this!
Padme: What?
Anakin: The lack of porno on page 62!
Padme: Oh... and here I though it was something important.
Anakin: B... but it is important!
Moments pass while Padme packs her clothes and Anakin reads his magazine (slow reader, huh?)
Anakin: Wow, I love you! *drools*
Padme: Really, Anakin?
Anakin: What, you? What the hell is wrong with you, woman?! Not you, her! *points at some naked, blue girl in his magazine* Who the hell would be desperate enough to love you?!
Padme: God damn, what's wrong with these women?! Just because they're aliens doesn't mean they can walk around naked!
Anakin: Yes it does... *pouts*
Later Anakin, Padme and R2-D2 were on their way to Naboo, about to enter some... bus... thing.
Anakin: *runs into another Jawa*
Jawa: *speaks in his jawa-gibberish language clenching fist*
Anakin: Yeah, yeah, whatever... *continues reading*
Padme: Anakin, that's 6th person... err, thing you've ran into, put that magazine down! *attempts to grab it*
Anakin: *growls*
Obi-Wan: I'm worried about those two...
Captain Typho: You should be worried about Padme.
Obi-Wan: Oh, so you think she'll kill herself being with Anakin too?
Captain Typho: That's not what I meant...
Obi-Wan: What did you mean?
Captain: Just forget it...
Later in the streets of Coco Town Obi-Wan walked around with a beer in his hand wearing headphones looking for Dex's Diner.
Obi-Wan: Row, row, row your boat!!! Gently down the stream!!! *takes off headphones and sees Dex's Diner* Oh boy, oh boy! *runs off into the small diner*
Dexter Jettster: Obi-Wan! *looks at the now scruffy looking Obi-Wan sipping out of a beer bottle* You sure look... different o_o
Obi-Wan: Yeah... do you have some beer here? *throws empty bottle out window, hitting a poor little Jawa*
Dex: No, but we have Jawa Juice or coffee.
Obi-Wan: No beer? *sob*
Suddenly a little Pit Droid runs around screaming hitting itself on the head.
Pit Droid: WOO-HOO!!! WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!!! *explodes*
Obi-Wan: Whoa, what did he have?
Dex: Lotsa coffee...
Obi-Wan: I'll take 9!
Dex: o_o Comin` right up...
Obi-Wan: So anyway, *pulls dart out from his pocket* Can you tell me where this dart came from?
WA-7: *throws coffees at Obi-Wan* Here ya go.
Obi-Wan: *drinks a whole coffee in one big gulp* AHHHH!!! What the hell?!?! This stuff is hot!!! *accidentally knocks down another one of the coffees, spilling it in his lap* O_O AHHH!!! *runs around screaming*
Dex: *ignoring Obi-Wan* Hmm... I can't seem to think of where this comes from...
Obi-Wan: *flops around on a couple's table*
Dex: Hmm... *scratches head*
Obi-Wan: *jumps on Dex's back screaming in a wild rage* Hot!!!
Dex: o_o The dart comes from...... *simply makes up a name* KAMINO!!! *throws dart out in the street* Now fetch!
Meanwhile in the transport on the way to Naboo R2-D2 was in a line for food.
Some Droid: Hey! There are no droids here!
R2-D2: Bleep beep! (Eat shit, ho!) *rolls off*
And meanwhile...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: *falls over of boring-ness*
Meanwhile Obi-Wan Kenobi is drinking beer while in weird library thing looking for this so called Kamino...
Obi-Wan: HEY!!! Excuse me! HELP!!! Hey!!!
Librarian: Can I help you?!
Obi-Wan: No need to get snappy... Anyway, I'm looking for a place called Kamino, but it doesn't seem to be here.
Librarian: Maybe that's because there is NO Kamino, Mr. Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan: Oh! But there is! *drinks out of beer bottle angrily*
Librarian: Excuse me but there is no drinks or food in here, especially not alcohol!
Obi-Wan: *looks at bottle* But this isn't alcohol... it's beer!
Librarian: o_o
Obi-Wan: Anyway, Kamino, should be right... here! *moves his arm and spills beer all over the place* o_o Oops..
Librarian: WTF?! *runs around screaming, knocking stuff down*
Obi-Wan: o_o *runs out of library as it collapses* Yeah... that was a lot of help! *walks off cursing under his breath*
Meanwhile...
Padme: *stare*...
Anakin: *read*...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: Nice day... huh?
Anakin: ...
Padme: *sigh*...
Yeah, so that was... "special", now back to Obi-Wan.
Yoda: Now, take bottle of water everybody does. *throws beers around*
Cute Little Kid: Why does this water taste like piss?
Yoda: Uhhh...
Obi-Wan: *walks in* What the hell are you doing giving these kids beers?!
(little kids look down at bottles and run around screaming)
Yoda: *looks clueless*
Obi-Wan: You never let me have one... *sob* So anyway, I can't find a planet, I need help.
Yoda: Lose planet you have? Heh heh... Hahaha! *jumps on Obi-Wans head and falls asleep laughing*
Obi-Wan: *throws Yoda on the ground*
Yoda: *wakes up* Up there, planet is! *points down*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ o_o Yeah, that was... interesting. Anyway, More pineapple madness will be coming up soon in chapter 3! Woo hoo! *explodes*
No, I still don't own Star Wars or anything else in this, but I'm working on it!
Ok, first off, I'm sorry for taking so long on this chapter, it's not even that good, but I promise you the next one will be at least close to funny. It's really hard for me to work on fics now that school started, but dun worry, I still do as much as I can each day! ^_~ Oh!!! And sorry for my constant use of cussing... it just kinda comes out, ya know.
Ch.2 Jetpacks and Jango Fruit
Anakin: Man, I can't believe this!
Padme: What?
Anakin: The lack of porno on page 62!
Padme: Oh... and here I though it was something important.
Anakin: B... but it is important!
Moments pass while Padme packs her clothes and Anakin reads his magazine (slow reader, huh?)
Anakin: Wow, I love you! *drools*
Padme: Really, Anakin?
Anakin: What, you? What the hell is wrong with you, woman?! Not you, her! *points at some naked, blue girl in his magazine* Who the hell would be desperate enough to love you?!
Padme: God damn, what's wrong with these women?! Just because they're aliens doesn't mean they can walk around naked!
Anakin: Yes it does... *pouts*
Later Anakin, Padme and R2-D2 were on their way to Naboo, about to enter some... bus... thing.
Anakin: *runs into another Jawa*
Jawa: *speaks in his jawa-gibberish language clenching fist*
Anakin: Yeah, yeah, whatever... *continues reading*
Padme: Anakin, that's 6th person... err, thing you've ran into, put that magazine down! *attempts to grab it*
Anakin: *growls*
Obi-Wan: I'm worried about those two...
Captain Typho: You should be worried about Padme.
Obi-Wan: Oh, so you think she'll kill herself being with Anakin too?
Captain Typho: That's not what I meant...
Obi-Wan: What did you mean?
Captain: Just forget it...
Later in the streets of Coco Town Obi-Wan walked around with a beer in his hand wearing headphones looking for Dex's Diner.
Obi-Wan: Row, row, row your boat!!! Gently down the stream!!! *takes off headphones and sees Dex's Diner* Oh boy, oh boy! *runs off into the small diner*
Dexter Jettster: Obi-Wan! *looks at the now scruffy looking Obi-Wan sipping out of a beer bottle* You sure look... different o_o
Obi-Wan: Yeah... do you have some beer here? *throws empty bottle out window, hitting a poor little Jawa*
Dex: No, but we have Jawa Juice or coffee.
Obi-Wan: No beer? *sob*
Suddenly a little Pit Droid runs around screaming hitting itself on the head.
Pit Droid: WOO-HOO!!! WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!!! *explodes*
Obi-Wan: Whoa, what did he have?
Dex: Lotsa coffee...
Obi-Wan: I'll take 9!
Dex: o_o Comin` right up...
Obi-Wan: So anyway, *pulls dart out from his pocket* Can you tell me where this dart came from?
WA-7: *throws coffees at Obi-Wan* Here ya go.
Obi-Wan: *drinks a whole coffee in one big gulp* AHHHH!!! What the hell?!?! This stuff is hot!!! *accidentally knocks down another one of the coffees, spilling it in his lap* O_O AHHH!!! *runs around screaming*
Dex: *ignoring Obi-Wan* Hmm... I can't seem to think of where this comes from...
Obi-Wan: *flops around on a couple's table*
Dex: Hmm... *scratches head*
Obi-Wan: *jumps on Dex's back screaming in a wild rage* Hot!!!
Dex: o_o The dart comes from...... *simply makes up a name* KAMINO!!! *throws dart out in the street* Now fetch!
Meanwhile in the transport on the way to Naboo R2-D2 was in a line for food.
Some Droid: Hey! There are no droids here!
R2-D2: Bleep beep! (Eat shit, ho!) *rolls off*
And meanwhile...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: *falls over of boring-ness*
Meanwhile Obi-Wan Kenobi is drinking beer while in weird library thing looking for this so called Kamino...
Obi-Wan: HEY!!! Excuse me! HELP!!! Hey!!!
Librarian: Can I help you?!
Obi-Wan: No need to get snappy... Anyway, I'm looking for a place called Kamino, but it doesn't seem to be here.
Librarian: Maybe that's because there is NO Kamino, Mr. Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan: Oh! But there is! *drinks out of beer bottle angrily*
Librarian: Excuse me but there is no drinks or food in here, especially not alcohol!
Obi-Wan: *looks at bottle* But this isn't alcohol... it's beer!
Librarian: o_o
Obi-Wan: Anyway, Kamino, should be right... here! *moves his arm and spills beer all over the place* o_o Oops..
Librarian: WTF?! *runs around screaming, knocking stuff down*
Obi-Wan: o_o *runs out of library as it collapses* Yeah... that was a lot of help! *walks off cursing under his breath*
Meanwhile...
Padme: *stare*...
Anakin: *read*...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: ...
Anakin: ...
Padme: Nice day... huh?
Anakin: ...
Padme: *sigh*...
Yeah, so that was... "special", now back to Obi-Wan.
Yoda: Now, take bottle of water everybody does. *throws beers around*
Cute Little Kid: Why does this water taste like piss?
Yoda: Uhhh...
Obi-Wan: *walks in* What the hell are you doing giving these kids beers?!
(little kids look down at bottles and run around screaming)
Yoda: *looks clueless*
Obi-Wan: You never let me have one... *sob* So anyway, I can't find a planet, I need help.
Yoda: Lose planet you have? Heh heh... Hahaha! *jumps on Obi-Wans head and falls asleep laughing*
Obi-Wan: *throws Yoda on the ground*
Yoda: *wakes up* Up there, planet is! *points down*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ o_o Yeah, that was... interesting. Anyway, More pineapple madness will be coming up soon in chapter 3! Woo hoo! *explodes*