Chapter Nine: I'm Not
Buffy looked up as Richard pushed open the door to the shop, causing the bell to ring. She and William followed him through the entryway and into the building. A couple – the owners, Buffy guessed – looked up from what appeared to be a heated discussion, plastering identical smiles on their faces. Buffy's eyes narrowed. She knew that look. She'd seen it on Dawn enough times to know it meant "I want you to think I'm completely innocent." Since Dawn had become aware that she made that face, though, the teen had taken to randomly using it just to throw Buffy off. However, nine times out of ten, it still meant Dawn might as well be holding the proverbial smoking gun – or as was more likely, some stained article of Buffy's clothing she'd failed to ask for before borrowing. Buffy's instincts told her that this was one of those nine times.
"Sir, Madam!" As Richard greeted the couple, the woman stepped forward and the man disappeared into the back of the shop.
Buffy carefully examined her surroundings. The shop was small, but its interior looked similar to the Magic Box. A selection of books lined one wall, while various ordinary items, which Buffy recognized from her long association with the supernatural as having wide use in magical circles, covered the shelves. That, in itself, wasn't enough to arouse Buffy's suspicion about the nature of the shop. However, the fact that all these everyday items were gathered together and sold in one place was.
Buffy felt she should be relieved; she'd seemingly found a magic shop, which dramatically increased her chances of getting home. However, something felt off. That gut feeling, combined with the owners' suspicious behavior, meant the Slayer was on alert.
"Mrs. Devlin," Richard said, "I'd like to introduce you to Miss Drusilla, who is staying with my family, and my cousin, William Sullivan."
For a split second, Buffy thought she saw the woman's eyes grow marginally wider before she smiled kindly. The action was so brief, however, that Buffy wasn't sure if it had happened, or if she'd imagined it.
"Miss Drusilla was hit in the head the other day, and she has lost her memory," Richard explained. "We were wondering if you carried anything that could help her remember."
"Perhaps," Mrs. Devlin said thoughtfully. "Let me check in the back if we have all the herbs you need. Excuse me."
The woman disappeared through a door, and Buffy scanned the store again, looking for the source of her continued unease. Observing her intense scrutiny, Richard leaned over a whispered reassuringly. "I know it's a peculiar looking shop, but we've gone to the Devlins for years. Mr. Devlin and Father are old friends."
"Oh, yes," William quickly added. "Mother often uses herbal teas that Mrs. Devlin recommended."
"I'm sure she'll find something," Buffy said, her attention only half of the men. A loud crash from the back room interrupted her inspection.
"Oh, dear," Richard said as he started towards the door to the back room. "I hope she's alright."
Before he could reach the door, however, it opened, and Mrs. Devlin came into the main room, quickly closing the door behind her.
"Are you alright?" William asked concernedly. "We heard a noise."
"I knocked over a box," the woman said. "Nothing to worry about. The good news is, I do have the ingredients to make a medicine. If you'll just come in the back, Miss Drusilla."
"We'll come with you," Richard volunteered, mistaking Buffy's suspiciously narrowed eyes for nervousness.
"I think it would be best if Miss Drusilla come back alone," Mrs. Devlin said firmly. Her response followed very quickly on the heels of Richard's statement, making Buffy even more suspicious that the woman was trying to separate her from the men. Deciding that not only preventing the woman from achieving her objective was important, but also that she could take Mrs. Devil if it came to that, Buffy responded sweetly, once again wrapping her hand around William's arm.
"I don't mind."
"As you wish," Mrs. Devlin acquiesced, making a sweeping motion towards the door, indicating that the others should precede her into the back room. Richard went through the door first, holding it open for the other two.
As Buffy and William entered the darkened back room, she slipped her hand from his arm, freeing herself and automatically falling into a defensive posture, her danger instincts still screaming at her. Off in the shadows on the other side of the room, the three could see a woman sitting in a chair and a man standing behind her. Taking another step forward, Richard and William realized that ropes bound the woman's limbs to the chair and a gag covered her mouth, while Buffy and Richard realized they knew the woman – Buffy, from a rooftop shootout long ago, as well as recent, more disturbing events, and Richard placed her as the woman he'd saved from begin trampled by horses the previous day.
"What is the meaning of this?" Richard demanded, starting towards the bound vampire, only to be stopped short by Mr. Devlin raising a crossbow as he stepped out of the shadows from behind Darla and placing the tip of the arrow against the blonde's temple. A quick glance over her shoulder confirmed what Buffy already suspected; Mrs. Devlin stood in the doorway to the main room of the shop, holding another crossbow, this one pointed at her. Buffy turned her body so her side was in the crossbow's target line, hopefully protecting her vulnerable heart. Feigning unconcern at the armed woman, Buffy spoke to Mr. Devlin.
"Go ahead. Pull the trigger." At Richard and William's incredulous looks, Buffy shrugged, failing to notice how large Darla's eyes had grown when the brunette spoke. "Won't kill her."
"Such compassion," Mrs. Devlin said, her sarcasm heavy. "But then again, I don't suppose I ought to expect any different from a creature like you."
"Madam," William said, drawing himself up and facing the woman who was obviously in charge. "I don't know what you think you know, but there is no cause to talk to Miss Drusilla that way."
"It's alright, William," Buffy said, placing a hand on his arm, fearing he would do something chivalrous, and ultimately stupid, like make a move towards the woman. Directing her attention to Mrs. Devlin, she said, "What do you want?"
"You."
Of course, Buffy sighed, How could I not have seen this coming? She nodded towards Richard and William as she said aloud, "Fine. Let them go and you can have me."
"You really expect me to believe a selfish creature like you would sacrifice yourself for others?" Mrs. Devlin laughed.
"You'd be surprised," Buffy said dryly as she felt a wry smile form on her face. "But, I can see how you might have trouble trusting me, what with the crazed sociopath look I'm sporting these days. Guess we'll just have to do things the hard way, then."
As she finished speaking, Buffy whipped her foot up in a high kick, knocking the crossbow up and out of Mrs. Devlin's surprised hands. Moving quickly, the Slayer grabbed the other woman's arm, spinning her around so she could wrap one arm around Mrs. Devlin's neck. Simultaneously, her free hand reached out and deftly caught the crossbow as it fell towards the earth, swinging it up to point at the now captive woman's head. A final turn meant that Buffy stood with her back to the door leading into the shop, Mrs. Devlin hostage in front of her, facing the other armed occupant of the room.
"Drop it," she instructed Mr. Devlin. When the man failed to comply, Buffy repeated the command a little louder. The second time did the trick. The crossbow fell from the man's hand, clattering to the ground and knocking the arrow from its setting. Gesturing to the left with her head, Buffy spoke again. "Over there. Move!"
Once Mr. Devlin had retreated from his position behind Darla, Richard quickly moved forward and scooped up the crossbow. While Buffy was giving William directions to find rope to restrain the elder man, Richard undid the bound woman's gag. He had started on the ropes binding her left arm when Buffy noticed his actions.
"What are you doing?" she asked. "Don't! She's dangerous."
"I'm dangerous?" Cordy demanded, indignantly. "You're the crazy one, Dru. And what the hell happened to your accent?"
Buffy sucked in a quick breath, realizing she'd given herself away to the blonde vampire. Deciding that she was, after all, as Darla had put it, the crazy one, she answered, "What accent?" The struggling of Mrs. Devlin in her grip drew Buffy's attention back to the woman before she could respond further.
"Look," the Slayer said to Mrs. Devlin, "You can calm down and let us tie you up, or I can knock you out and then tie you up. It's your choice, but I'm guessing you'd be happier with door number one."
"Drusilla," William began, understanding the meaning of the dark-haired beauty's statement, if not the specific reference, "are you sure such threats are necessary?"
Mrs. Devlin stopped struggling against her captor, and Buffy pushed the woman away from her, towards Mr. Devlin, keeping the crossbow trained on the couple as she responded.
"These people just tried to kidnap me. Now, I'll grant they might have a legitimate grudge against Darla and Drusilla, but I still don't take kindly to things like that."
"And I don't take kindly to being lied to," Richard said coldly, his voice drawing Buffy's attention to the fact that he had reloaded the other crossbow and now had it trained on her. "Why don't you tell us who you really are, Drusilla?"
"Fair enough," she said, desperately trying to think of a plausible explanation.
Buffy's earlier pop culture reference to one of those old game shows Gunn sometimes watched on the Game Show channel, had clinched Cordy's suspicions and she spoke up. "You're not Drusilla."
"I'm not," Buffy agreed. "Still doesn't mean I'm going to help you, Darla."
"Not even if I told you I'm not Darla?" the seer asked.
"Okay, then," Buffy challenged. "Who are you?"
"I'm . . ." Cordy trailed off, suddenly unsure of what to say, only knowing some instinct inside of her was screaming that revealing her true identity would be foolish. "I'm from the future. I don't think it's wise to reveal my name."
Seeing how caught up the others were in Drusilla and Darla's conversation, Mrs. Devlin nudged her husband and nodded her head slightly towards the darkest corner of the room, which contained another door, leading into the alley behind the shop. As one, the couple turned and sprinted towards the door, Mrs. Devlin flinging it open as they reached it, the motion barely slowing their momentum.
Four heads turned and watched as the Devlins vanished into the night. Buffy lowered her crossbow, but did not release it, as she turned back to Richard and Darla.
"That's a good excuse," Buffy said to the blonde, "but it's also convenient. How do I know I can trust you?"
"I don't think you're the one who should be worried about who can trust who right now, considering you obviously remember more than you're letting on," Richard said angrily, his crossbow still trained on the dark-haired stranger he'd met the previous evening. To his cousin he added, "William, please come over here and untie this woman."
"No!" Buffy protested. "We still don't know that it's not Darla."
"And even if she is this Darla," William asked. "How dangerous can she be? She's just a woman."
"Hey, buster!" Cordy said indignantly. "I'll have you know I could kick your ass, even if I wasn't a–" the seer cut herself off, stopping just short of saying "vampire." "…all tied up," she finished quickly.
William halted his movement towards the blonde, startled by her vulgarity and threat.
Buffy weighted her options before carefully setting her crossbow on the floor and slowly raising her arms. While the Devlins were hopefully still running, it was equally possible, considering their apparent familiarity with not only the supernatural, but also Darla and Drusilla, that they could return with reinforcements at any moment.
"We need to get out of here," she said to Richard. "Untie Darla if you must, but she goes first, then me, then you two." The Slayer was counting on three things: one, that Richard wouldn't actually shoot her; two, if he did, he wouldn't know to aim for her heart. It would hurt, but it wouldn't be fatal; and, three, if Darla was lying and she tried anything, Buffy would still be between her and the men.
Richard nodded his agreement and Buffy watched as William untied Darla, to be rewarded with a kind smile and a "Thank you" as the woman stood. It was the uncharacteristic behavior that made Buffy's decision for her. "I'm from California in the year 2002."
"Me too," Cordy said, trying to think of another way to establish her identity without giving away information that could be used to find her in the future. "How do you know Drusilla?"
"How do you know Darla?" the other countered.
"I asked you first," Cordy said.
"And I gave my information first last time," Buffy argued.
"Okay," Cordy ceded, rolling her eyes at the childish nature of the disagreement. "Darla is…I know someone who has a lot of history with her. And Drusilla, for that matter."
"Dru is the ex of my ex," Buffy said before shaking her head. "Actually she's the ex of more than one of my exes. And this just gets weirder every time I think about it."
"Harmony?" Cordy asked in disbelief.
"What?" Buffy demanded. "No! Why would you think that? Wait, you know Harmony?"
"You said Dru was the ex of your ex. Who I'm guessing is Spike. And the last person, and only person, I know of Spike dating besides Drusilla is Harmony."
"Weirder and weirder," Buffy muttered to herself. "No, I'm…" she paused, swallowing. It had gotten easier once her affair with Spike had become public knowledge among her friends to talk about it, but what she was about to say still came difficultly. "I'm the one after Harmony."
"Oh," Cordelia said, thinking. "Wait a minute. You said you've dated more than one of Dru's exes. Who's the other?"
Buffy just looked at the other woman. "I don't know, Darla," she said, placing extra emphasis on the name. "Who else was Dru ever involved with?"
The light clicked on for Cordelia and she quickly put the pieces together. "Buffy?"
"You won't give your name, but it's okay to say mine?" Drusilla's face and voice asking the question, overlaid with the knowledge that it was Buffy inside of her made Cordy break into a hysterical giggle.
"I'm Cordy," she admitted when she'd regained control of herself. Buffy's lack of reaction made the seer prompt her. "You know, Queen C?" Drusilla's eyes took on a look of recognition, causing the absurdity of the situation to hit Cordelia again. She burst out into full-blown laughter, and Buffy soon joined her.
"Ladies?"
The voice was so familiar that Buffy turned quickly, finding herself sharply disappointed when she was greeted with William's concerned face instead of the familiar smirk and cocked eyebrow she'd irrationally been expecting.
"Did you say 2002?" he asked.
Buffy nodded Drusilla's head before saying, "It's a long story and, to be honest, I don't think either of us fully understand it." Receiving an agreeing nod from Darla – no, Cordelia – she continued, "But, like I said, we do need to get out of here. Let's go. I promise we'll tell you what we can when we're safe."
As the four headed out into the night, Cordelia realized exactly what about the earlier revelations was still bothering her. Turning to the woman beside her, she spoke.
"So, you and Spike, huh?"
To be continued in: "Chapter Ten: Brides of Angelus"
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A/N: Fear not, gentle reader, our gals may have found each other out, but there are still plenty of surprises a-brewing! Plus, wacky folks who think kidnapping a vampire is a good idea still running around out there somewhere. I mean, really, how stupid do you have to be to think you can kidnap someone like Darla and that's not gonna come back to bit you in the rear? (Presuming Darla's really Darla…)
Thanks to Winter, IngridSarah, Vette, and Annie – you guys rocked my world with your reviews! Also, if anyone's looking for some more good reading, go check out Annie's stuff (under the penname "mjaw") – very Spuffaholic!