__Insert Melodramatic Title Here__
*disclaimer not needed, because of course they belong to me. Ha.
Summary: A/U, SquallxSeifer. YAOI! SHOUNEN-AI! More sex than you can shake a stick at! (and if you believe that, then there's this bridge that I think you might be interested in buying)
What is true: More plot, plot and fucking plot. Can't two guys just get hot and heavy without all this plot? Apparently not. LoL. Talk about delayed gratification. You guys are better off surfing for porn.
Author's notes: I have resolved to find a proper title for this fic. Though I'm beginning to be fond of the current one…
Dedicated to: To the entire cast of Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Ghaum. Because I really need to get hooked on more Hindi movies. *snort*
Also to the various FF8 authors that have made my fanfic reading more enjoyable: Sodoshiin (Illusions and Reflections), Race Ulfson (thank you for your reviews. And all your stories), NightsDawne (for her Irvine/Squall/Seifer series), Persephone (Clouded Night), Baby Dragon, Seshat (Keepers; can't wait for the coming chapters), Dee (the ongoing Futureloop) and plenty more.
And a very BIG thank you to the kind souls who have reviewed this story. Should see me here, grinning like a fool.
And again, a big shoutout to Annie D, for being the silly goose she is. :)
And to my best friend. Good luck stalking MCG yeah?
Oh yeah: I support tertiary education (I'm bloody going through it). And I knew these characters are more than intelligent to ace their university years. But I want Squall just out of high school graduation. So now you know. :)
==================
Chapter 3: My Life as a Spanish telenovela (because it's long, filled with plot contrivances and gorgeous guys, though eventually all the drama will end. Right? Right?)
So let's recap: Our brave young hero (huh) escaped to the city in a state of much anxiety and stress caused by a few things I (narrator and the aforesaid hero) have decided not to divulge yet, in the spirit of just being a tease, one of which concerned about the death of his previous love, and yeah, that was about it. He also found to his dismay, that the streets of the city weren't lined with gold, money does not grow on trees and it was impossible for him to find a decent job and still keep hiding. All in all, the bed of roses turned out to be dead and thorny.
Much fun all around.
But, hope remained. He went for a walk, got mildly lost and found himself in a park at dusk with a really really gorgeous guy. Unfortunately, Mystery Cute Guy might be heterosexual and in all likelihood, our hero would never see him again. But still, he was cute.
He went back to sleep that night still jobless, still hopeless and still dreaming of things that he knew he couldn't change.
All right, pathetic attempt at positive thinking concluded. Let's move on.
It had been two days since I shared that moment with that beautiful stranger. My status was still unchanged. I was still an unemployed youth, still hiding, still keeping secrets. I did however, make a mental note however, to disembowel the pompous ass that swindled my school into allowing him to hold that positive thinking seminar.
Oh, I was not bitter at all, as you could tell.
But before my sarcasm gets too confusing, I was honestly feeling better. Oh, I wasn't deluded into thinking that everything would all be sunshine and rainbows, but at the same time, the cloud of depression that had been hounding me the better part of a week had gone. There was resignation, and there was peace, but I still won't give up. I just wouldn't give myself ulcers worrying.
Still, it would be nice if I could just get a job. I had kept myself busy helping out at the hostel, but there was a feeling of longing within me. I didn't much believe in fate then, but I guess those three sisters weren't finished with me yet. Sometimes I wonder, was this what they do for kicks? Spin a wheel, pick a hapless mortal and start gnarling their strands of destiny and see what the poor bastard will do next?
All right, cleansing breath. No ulcers, remember?
It was lunch again at the cafeteria when my life finally stopped being on hold, and opportunity presented itself. Shiva was at the receptionist desk answering a call, her food tray abandoned beside mine. I remembered thinking that once I am able to, I'll stop eating baked beans forever. (Let me add however, that pledge is now forgotten, as nothing goes better with toast than baked beans) Anyway, Cid took a seat across from me, and waited for me to finish before clearing his throat. He was a stout, middle-aged man, also one of the regulars helping out here, always ready with a smile, and ready advice. Reams of advice. Or just about anything. That man loves to talk. I think he had a soft spot for me because while I certainly could keel over from boredom whenever one of his little speeches take over five minutes, I didn't show it. Being stoic and emotionless did have its benefits after all, as his next words proved.
"Listen Jeremy, I know you're looking for a job, and there's an opening at the Garden, so if you're interested it's yours." The Garden is Cid's 'little baby' as he calls it. A bistro/restaurant/club/whatever, the amount of time he spent talking about it was just another proof of his affection for it. The surprise and gratitude I was feeling must have showed clearly on my face, because he beamed, and continued telling me about what the job's requirements would be.
But as unbelievable this turn of good fortune was, I couldn't possibly accept it, because…. Because. My small frown stopped him from his little speech about starting out small and I was still young after all, and I opened my mouth to speak, only to find no sound came out of it. I tried again. "Cid, I'm grateful, I really am. But you don't know my whole story, and I can't tell you, and I want to, but I can't and I don't think you'll appreciate that, so before you turn me down I have to decline and--" I was babbling.
He held up a hand and made a little 'pshaaww' sound. He looked me straight in the eye, and I was so unnerved by the straightforwardness of the gesture. He looked so fearless. He had always been fearless, but I had dismissed it, fooled by his good nature, and I realised that I wasn't the first to underestimate this brave man who was prone to laughter.
"I've been watching you and you seem like a smart boy. Now, I don't know what it is you're running away from, but I can see you want to keep a low profile and that is not helping in your search for a job. Am I right?"
I could do nothing but nod weakly. "I can't give you my citizen's number. And-- and I have to be paid in cash, because I can't open a bank account."
"Fine. I'll just make up some numbers, and maybe I'll open one for you." There was a smile lurking in his eyes. "And of course your name is Jeremy."
My mouth must have been hanging open because the next thing I knew, Shiva resumed her seat and oh-so-helpfully closed my jaw. Her blue eyes looked amused. "What's up?"
"I just offered him a job at the Garden," Cid said nonchalantly.
"Ah." She was unsurprised. She also looked like she knew more than she was letting on. Hyne save me from people too perceptive for their own good.
"I work there too," she said, as she was adding more pepper on her beans. "Accounts and such. Or else," she smirked at Cid, "this man would be operating on a loss." She impulsively hugged me, while Cid was smiling widely. "You're gonna love it there. Some of the kids working there you should recognise, because they help out here too most of the times."
My head was spinning at my sudden luck, and at the incredibility of it and true to being me, I felt suspicious. "Why?" I demanded, too bewildered to make the question harsh.
He shrugged, still smiling. "You just remind me of a boy I used to raise. I'd imagine he'd be about your age now." And that was that.
And that was how I came to the Garden.
-----------------------
It turned out Cid also owned the building the Garden was in, and the upper storeys were rented out. For his workers who don't already have their own place, he lets them rent the units at far lower rate, and he docks it out of our pay every month. He doesn't usually do this however, which was why I felt really uncomfortable with what I considered an act of charity above and beyond what was usual, for about a couple of days after I started work and shown to my place. To be honest, I'd rather not be so indebted to any person, but you have to squash your pride sometime and just suck it up and be pragmatic about the whole thing.
The studio apartment itself was lovely, definitely worth more than what I was paying. Clean, no leaky pipes or creatures of the lower food chain that I can see, sparsely furnished, a promising place. With half a month's advance that Cid gave me, I went out and indulged myself in a thick, quilted comforter, you know, the sort that makes you never want to get out bed? That night sleeping in with that comforter was just heaven, with me making embarrassing (and potentially damaging to my broody moody persona) happy noises.
The floor I was at was also mostly occupied by the Garden employees, all of whom apparently, share a history with Cid even before he opened the Garden. Shiva was right, I did recognise them. I've seen them around the hostel, helping out, but I never noticed because they themselves were too busy to come often. They were all very enthusiastic in welcoming me, and weren't put off by my non-speech (to put it one way). There was Zell and Quistis, the head waiters. Selphie and Irvine, the head cooks and Ifrit and Q (he was pretty resigned in explaining that nobody ever managed to get both the spelling and pronunciation of his name right), the bouncers. Very quickly I was included in their little circle, and as maudlin as I thought it was, I had arrived home.
I settled into the rhythm of my new life pretty quickly. The Garden, with its a café/bistro-turned-nightclub and dance floor on the ground floor and a four-star restaurant on the first floor, was one of the more popular hangouts for the trendy set of Esthar, and the nights were crazy, with a thousand problems and a thousand customers, all demanding our attention. At first I was given only day shifts, to get myself used to its pace, and wanting to prove that Cid's faith in me would not be misplaced, I worked diligently and a little more than a week later, I was promoted to the night shift.
I think it was with a certain amount of glee that Zell gave me the waiter duties on the first couple of nights. True, the first floor was more sedate compared to the pulsing music filling the club downstairs, but as a Garden waiter, Cid stressed on being helpful and friendly. Which meant a lot of smiling. Yes. Ha ha. Funny. The cheeky devil certainly didn't need any more reason to be cheerful those two nights.
But overall, I enjoyed it, the whole atmosphere of the Garden, even if I had to endure bouts of smiling. Or at least, non-scowling. Eventually, Quistis, who wasn't as evil as her boyfriend, wisely shuffled me to bartending duties, as soon as Xu (who was the previous occupant of my apartment) managed to help me master a sizeable inventory of cocktails and drinks in my downtime. I didn't have to smile so much, and I was already very good at nodding. At first I thought I should work on the appropriate sympathetic bartender expression, but after coming up with one grimace after another, both Xu and I agreed my patented blank expression would do just as well.
Outside of work, I still spent time with the Garden crew. I didn't know anyone else in the city, and they were generous with their invitations. And they never seemed to mind that I wasn't exactly forthcoming about myself than they are about theirs. The main storyteller was Selphie, with the rest chiming in at appropriate moments. We were hanging out at Xu's new place with her lover, when she told me about how most of them were orphans raised by Cid. It was because of the war they had all lost their parents. I didn't remember much about the war; in fact I didn't remember much of anything before I was adopted. I didn't tell them that, but the fact that we're all orphans just struck a chord within me, which I kept silent.
I'd rather not be reminded of what I had left behind, not when everything was going so well.
Well, Fate's a bitch that way.
------------------------------
I was already working at the Garden for two weeks when Rinoa came. I regretted choosing the morning shift that day, because my nightmare the previous night was exceptionally bad. I couldn't sleep after I woke up gasping at 4 o' clock in the morning, sobbing into my pillow until I felt all wrung out. Everyone was keeping out of my way, because seeing me growl 'good morning' like a hungover bear was more than enough, thank you.
So having Rinoa show up would make perfect sense, in the fucked-up drama that was my life.
I didn't know who was more surprised. I scowled as her eyes widened and she gave a little gasp. She would probably have said my name too, if I didn't glare at her in time. But I couldn't manage to stop her from glomping me. Oh well, it had been a while. Against my will, I felt glad. I didn't realise how much I missed being … normal.
After she had successfully managed to partially suffocate me, she looked up at me and said firmly, "We need to talk."
You know, every time a girl says that, it's never good.
------------------------
I took advantage of my lunch break to take us away from the Garden. It was good to see her again, and we did need to talk, but not there. I didn't even realise that I had steered us to the same park where I had met the mysterious stranger (I made a few more visits after I had settled into my job. I suppose I was feeling wistful).
We didn't exactly leave the Garden in a hurry, because one, it would rouse suspicion, and two, Rinoa really was looking for lunch. She offered me a Portugese egg tart, but I declined. I wasn't that hungry and I didn't think the promised conversation should be held with me having pastry crumbs on my mouth. I didn't even bother asking her the reason why she was there, because not to be all self-centred, there was no other reason for a girl from a small town like Timber to come to a big city like Esthar.
She took her time finishing that tart, savouring it like it was the most delicious in the world (it is, but that's not the point), while I was sitting there, stewing uncomfortably. Her little revenge for my leaving her and not telling. I could see why she would get mad. She was the closest friend I ever had back home. We knew our parents had intended to pair us up, but that was just like marrying your sibling. We had grown up too close together to ever have any romantic feelings, and in the later years, we made a silent pact to find ourselves partners and force our parents to accept our choices. She became my confidante, and was the only one who knew I was gay. We joked about how I beat her in finding a partner, but it was a joke laced with bitterness. In the military environment that we grew up with, homosexuality was a taboo, a disease. I had told everything. Except that night where everything in my world turned upside down and I had to leave.
She cleaned her mouth delicately and methodically, ignoring my frown. Oh, she was really taking her time. Then she looked straight at me, matching me frown for frown, and asked, in a pleasant voice that did not fit her scowl, "So how are you?"
"Fine. You shouldn't be here."
"Why not? I should start sending in university applications already, and I hear Esthar have some good ones, so I thought I should check it out." From her flippant tone, I knew that was the excuse she had given her parents. She was still scowling.
I finally conceded defeat, and said tiredly, "I'm sorry Rinoa." Immediately she scooted closer and pulled me into a hug. After a while, she asked softly, "Can I know about it?"
"You really shouldn't."
She jabbed me at the side. "Tell me."
So I told her about that night. She was pretty quiet throughout it all, except the parts about Terence. He was a good friend of her too. We military kids after all grew up together. I was dispassionate, my voice flat, in the manner of someone merely reciting facts.
After I was done, we lay quiet, heads leaning against each other. My eyes were dry, while Rinoa was quietly sniffling. I suppose my tears were only reserved for the nightmares.
"Does your father know?" she finally asked.
"No new revelations after he caught us necking by the couch, so no. But I think he suspected things. He didn't ask. He just gave me money and told me to go."
"It was chaos after you left. Nobody knew about the two of you, but the police was suspicious. Your dad was all forbidding-like when they came to your house. Mr Military Man. Said you were visiting your aunt in Galbadia just two days before the murder. Good thing you keep to yourself and visit those obscure places nobody knew exist," she gave a slight smile at that. Then she frowned as she continued, "then after the police, I noticed these shady-looking guys were loitering about. Asking around for you. Went to the bus depot and all that. Your father got before them first, and I honestly knew nothing." At that she pinched me hard on the arm. I yelped. That hurt dammit.
"They didn't check on my aunt?"
"Who? The police? You're currently suffering from laryngitis and measles. Those shady guys? Your aunt isn't known for being a paranoiac hag for nothing." She grinned.
"So how come you managed to beat them all?" I was impressed, despite myself.
"I really was checking out the universities." We laughed. "But I thought, you know, for some reason, you would be here. I was hoping you would."
"I'm glad," I said sincerely.
She held my hand tightly, and I could see her barely hidden worry. "You really ought to go to the police."
"I'm afraid." I understood what she meant. I had asked myself the same question a million times. We grew up to respect authority, but I'm too afraid. And too doubtful.
She sighed. She knew what I was afraid of. There was no guarantee that the police can protect me. Those shady-looking men felt too dangerous, and powerful. There was no way I could win against them. And I won't let my death be their triumph. Not when I remember Terence.
I looked at my watch and realised my lunch break was long over. Regretfully, I stood up. "I have to go. When I will see you again?"
She shook her head unhappily. "I'm taking the train to Timber today. Papa only let me off for today. I guess… I guess when I start my semester here," she grinned. "Maybe a little earlier than that, I need to get my supplies and everything."
---------------------------------------------
I went back to the Garden, my mood already brightening with Rinoa's parting words. It felt good to finally talk to someone about it. That night, I slept without nightmares for the first time in a long while. I only wished that I had some way to honour Terence's memory. I finally bought a flowering cactus to put on my windowsill. I suppose cacti weren't exactly romantic, but I wanted to honour him, not kill him all over again.
Three days after Rinoa's visit, the Garden was suddenly filled with anticipation. Without asking, Selphie as usual filled me in. Seifer's coming back, along with Ellone and Matron. They had been visiting Balamb and Winhill, where the orphanage used to be and Ellone's mother's grave. Matron was Edea, Cid's wife and Ellone was Laguna's daughter. Do I know Laguna? Who doesn't know Laguna? He is one of the richest businessmen worldwide. A billionaire several times over, it is said. I must have looked surprised at the connection, because Selphie winked at me at that point.
"What about Seifer?"
"Seifer?" Irvine interrupted from stirring the contents in a large pot. "He was one of us," he drawled. "Bright as all hells and arrogant as anythin'. Certified genius, he used to boast." He laughed. "Not anymore, not when I have all this crockery with me. Anyway, Laguna all but officially adopted him, when it became obvious normal schoolin' just won't do with him, and Cid couldn't find the means to, not with the rest of us to take care of."
"All but officially?" I was intrigued by that.
They grew quiet at that, and looked at each other. "Well," Selphie began slowly. "Laguna came to the Orphanage a few years after the war. He was thought to be killed in action, and his wife died giving birth to the second one. He came to claim his children, but there was only Ellone. The other one, had been adopted. Cid was really sorry, and no one told me the details, but it seems they never could get Laguna's son back. Anyway, he got real close with us, and we're like his nieces and nephews. Seifer's the closest to him, but we all knew it was his son he came for."
For some reason that story made my eyes sting. I cleared my throat and said feebly, "that's sad."
"Yeah," said Irvine, "but I reckon both the boy and the father are doin' fine, even if they'll never get to meet." And that was the end of that story.
Eventually, I was caught up with the excitement of the rest and took greater interest in what was happening. The Garden will be closed tonight, to celebrate their homecoming. Even Laguna was coming, and inexplicably that little bit of information excited me.
They were expected to arrive sometime after 4, so almost everybody was busy tidying up and setting up the decorations upstairs, leaving me alone to take care the café, the only part of the Garden still open for normal business.
I was busy at the cash register, when a voice I would recognise anywhere said behind me, "Hello."
I spun around in surprise, and there he was again, pleased amusement in his green eyes and his blond hair uncovered by any baseball cap. Would you think less of me if I told you that my knees felt weak? Have you seen him?
And that, was how I met Mr. Seifer Almasy for the second time.
==================
END chapter 3