A/N Thank you for the reviews! They really help me a lot to be motivated to
update. As for going along with the book's story line and the movie's, I'm
doing a bit of what happened in the books and movies and a bit of my own
imagination, just so you all know. Keep the reviews commin'! Forgive any
miss spelling of people or places. Enjoy chapter 7!
I awoke the next morning, fully healed, at least on the outside. I just couldn't come to believe I lost my brother. I cried when no one was looking, and was tearing myself apart trying to determine whether going to battle was a good idea or not. One part of me said yes, that Haldir died in familiar arms but another part of me said no, because his death played over and over in my head. I couldn't imagine bearing to see mother's face when I go to the Grey Havens and tell about her eldest son's fate.
I now felt very alone, because I was the only member of my family still in Middle Earth. I wanted to go home to Rivendell, but what remained there? Most of the Elves there have left too, so I would find no comfort there. I couldn't go to Lorien, because I was still too much a stranger to the people there, and I had already received enough hospitality from the Lady to ask for any more. I decided that I should just continue going on with the others. But I couldn't go in the emotional state I was. It was very hard and went completely against my heart, but I stopped my weeping and took a deep breath. I had to move on, weeping was a luxury I did not have and I still a job to fulfil. I went looking for Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas, and found them with Theoden. I don't know what came over me, but I didn't cringe at the sight of the dwarf and was actually glad to see people I knew. Legolas came to me, with a look of sympathy still on his face. "Are you sure you can travel?" He asked. I nodded "I have no choice. Where else is there for me to go? I have no one else left here." I said, I had not realized I had hurt his feelings. "Do you not still have me?" He asked, I could hear the pain in his voice. "Legolas, forgive me. I had only been thinking of my family and not my friends. Yes, I still have you." I hugged him to prove it. I never knew it before, but I always looked forward to our hugs. Something about being in his caring arms was always comforting no matter what. I had some feelings for him beyond friendship, but the rest I would have for hi min that way where not there because he was a wonderful friend and I wasn't about to loose that by making things to awkward.
I was surprised to see the riders and Gandalf with the group. I greeted Gandalf, and he put a hand on my left shoulder. "Rinwethien, you have my sympathy, and it times like this one should be mourning. Do you wish to still travel? You are no obligated to, the choice is entirely yours." I thought it over for a short time, even though I already knew the answer. I could sail to the undying shores, and see my family and everything could go back to being semi-normal. That was almost my choice, but I still felt I had some part left to play here. "I wish to go on traveling." I said, Gandalf scanned by face, then determined I was positive this was my choice said "You will be remembered for you're bravery and strength." He said no more and went to talk with Theoden.
I spoke with Legolas while the others determined where our path would take us. "Rin, are you sure you are absolutely alright? You still seem sad.........." I was slightly frustrated with him. "I will be sad. But I'm not going to let that stop what I decided to do." I said as calmly as possible. He still had that look about him of sadness. "Legolas, it should be I who asks you about such things. You have more sadness about you than even I." I tried to make it sound jokingly, but Legolas just turned his head to the ground. "I'm fine, I just want to make sure you are." I knew he was lying. He almost never kept anything from me, but I could always tell when he was. "Legolas, something is troubling you. Why can't you tell me?" I asked. He looked deeply in my eyes. "I really wish I could, Rinwethien. I wish I could." With that he walked back to everyone else. What was wrong with him? Whatever it was, it really bothered him. I went back to the group.
Our journey would now take us to Isengard, to confront Sauruman. We had to stop for the soldiers though, that night. I decided that if Legolas didn't tell me what was wrong, he would tell someone else. Legolas was never good at keeping his mouth shut when it came to things that could get such a reaction out of him. I saw Gimli sitting by a fire.
"Hello Gimli!" I tried to make my voice as sweet a possible. "What?" He grumbled back. "I'm no good with words so if you want sympathy, I cannot offer it." He added, remembering my current situation. "Gimli, you know Legolas well, something is bothering him, but he cannot tell me." Gimli laughed a bit "So you know something!" I exclaimed, Gimli's smile wiped off his face. I caught him. "Tell me what you know." I practically demanded. "Sorry, but that isn't for me to say. He will tell you someday." I grew angry. "Gimli! Tell me please?" I begged but he only laughed. "An elf begging a dwarf? I should have this event recorded!" This was pointless. "Thanks anyway." I said disappointed and walked off.
This was too confusing. I went out to the woods and sat down in a clearing. I had nothing to really think about, and my brother's death crept back into my mind. A few tears went down my cheek. Even though I had my friends, I still felt empty. I starred out into the black star lit sky. Tears still went down. I finally buried my head in my arms, shoulders quivering from the force of my sobs. I heard someone coming my way and I turned quickly. Of all people to be there, it was Mr. "Sorry-I-Can't-Tell- You-Anything-Anymore" himself. "May I join you?" He asked. I nodded and he took a seat next to me. I tried to force back and wipe away the traces of my tears. He put a comforting arm around my shoulder. "Everything will be better some day." He said. "I would like to believe you, but now I cannot see it. There is so little hope left in me and I feel so alone, even with my friends." He looked off into the distance, then faced me. I felt a few more tears fall. He gently brushed them off my face.
"Rinwethien,synthra uum nall. Ta rusvea mia ura a' elei lle e' awr". [Rinwethien, please do not cry. It breaks my heart to see you in pain.] His gaze was very tender.
"Legolas, amin uum rangw. Mani sa ta tanya lle quen?" [Legolas, I do not understand. What is it that you speak?]
He traced my jaw line with a finger. "Amin uume now' tanya lle neis oio tyav vell atya, dara', amin ant' a' ita lle..........amin mela lle." [I did not think that you could ever feel the same, but, I have to tell you........I love you.]
I was shocked. "lle del' itien mi sina durre?" [You are telling me this with faithfulness?] He nodded.
"Uma." [Yes] He gave me another very tender look. A smiled played across my lips.
"Lle um tyav vell atya isi amin?" [you do feel the same as I?] He asked with hope.
"Uma." [Yes] He grinned in satisfaction. "I am relieved. Its was tearing me apart not being able to tell you." He said. Then he came closer to my face until we were an inch apart.
"Legolas! Where are you?" called Aragorn. Legolas backed away, his face red. "I must go." I placed my hand on his. "It is alright." I said. He nodded and jogged off. I let out the breath I had been holding in. So close! Oh well, I had thought. There will be other times. I decided to stay for awhile, thinking about everything that had happened. Everything about him made me smile. His gentle and steady voice. His caring touch and loving glances. I had it bad, I was truly in love with him.
I awoke the next morning, fully healed, at least on the outside. I just couldn't come to believe I lost my brother. I cried when no one was looking, and was tearing myself apart trying to determine whether going to battle was a good idea or not. One part of me said yes, that Haldir died in familiar arms but another part of me said no, because his death played over and over in my head. I couldn't imagine bearing to see mother's face when I go to the Grey Havens and tell about her eldest son's fate.
I now felt very alone, because I was the only member of my family still in Middle Earth. I wanted to go home to Rivendell, but what remained there? Most of the Elves there have left too, so I would find no comfort there. I couldn't go to Lorien, because I was still too much a stranger to the people there, and I had already received enough hospitality from the Lady to ask for any more. I decided that I should just continue going on with the others. But I couldn't go in the emotional state I was. It was very hard and went completely against my heart, but I stopped my weeping and took a deep breath. I had to move on, weeping was a luxury I did not have and I still a job to fulfil. I went looking for Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas, and found them with Theoden. I don't know what came over me, but I didn't cringe at the sight of the dwarf and was actually glad to see people I knew. Legolas came to me, with a look of sympathy still on his face. "Are you sure you can travel?" He asked. I nodded "I have no choice. Where else is there for me to go? I have no one else left here." I said, I had not realized I had hurt his feelings. "Do you not still have me?" He asked, I could hear the pain in his voice. "Legolas, forgive me. I had only been thinking of my family and not my friends. Yes, I still have you." I hugged him to prove it. I never knew it before, but I always looked forward to our hugs. Something about being in his caring arms was always comforting no matter what. I had some feelings for him beyond friendship, but the rest I would have for hi min that way where not there because he was a wonderful friend and I wasn't about to loose that by making things to awkward.
I was surprised to see the riders and Gandalf with the group. I greeted Gandalf, and he put a hand on my left shoulder. "Rinwethien, you have my sympathy, and it times like this one should be mourning. Do you wish to still travel? You are no obligated to, the choice is entirely yours." I thought it over for a short time, even though I already knew the answer. I could sail to the undying shores, and see my family and everything could go back to being semi-normal. That was almost my choice, but I still felt I had some part left to play here. "I wish to go on traveling." I said, Gandalf scanned by face, then determined I was positive this was my choice said "You will be remembered for you're bravery and strength." He said no more and went to talk with Theoden.
I spoke with Legolas while the others determined where our path would take us. "Rin, are you sure you are absolutely alright? You still seem sad.........." I was slightly frustrated with him. "I will be sad. But I'm not going to let that stop what I decided to do." I said as calmly as possible. He still had that look about him of sadness. "Legolas, it should be I who asks you about such things. You have more sadness about you than even I." I tried to make it sound jokingly, but Legolas just turned his head to the ground. "I'm fine, I just want to make sure you are." I knew he was lying. He almost never kept anything from me, but I could always tell when he was. "Legolas, something is troubling you. Why can't you tell me?" I asked. He looked deeply in my eyes. "I really wish I could, Rinwethien. I wish I could." With that he walked back to everyone else. What was wrong with him? Whatever it was, it really bothered him. I went back to the group.
Our journey would now take us to Isengard, to confront Sauruman. We had to stop for the soldiers though, that night. I decided that if Legolas didn't tell me what was wrong, he would tell someone else. Legolas was never good at keeping his mouth shut when it came to things that could get such a reaction out of him. I saw Gimli sitting by a fire.
"Hello Gimli!" I tried to make my voice as sweet a possible. "What?" He grumbled back. "I'm no good with words so if you want sympathy, I cannot offer it." He added, remembering my current situation. "Gimli, you know Legolas well, something is bothering him, but he cannot tell me." Gimli laughed a bit "So you know something!" I exclaimed, Gimli's smile wiped off his face. I caught him. "Tell me what you know." I practically demanded. "Sorry, but that isn't for me to say. He will tell you someday." I grew angry. "Gimli! Tell me please?" I begged but he only laughed. "An elf begging a dwarf? I should have this event recorded!" This was pointless. "Thanks anyway." I said disappointed and walked off.
This was too confusing. I went out to the woods and sat down in a clearing. I had nothing to really think about, and my brother's death crept back into my mind. A few tears went down my cheek. Even though I had my friends, I still felt empty. I starred out into the black star lit sky. Tears still went down. I finally buried my head in my arms, shoulders quivering from the force of my sobs. I heard someone coming my way and I turned quickly. Of all people to be there, it was Mr. "Sorry-I-Can't-Tell- You-Anything-Anymore" himself. "May I join you?" He asked. I nodded and he took a seat next to me. I tried to force back and wipe away the traces of my tears. He put a comforting arm around my shoulder. "Everything will be better some day." He said. "I would like to believe you, but now I cannot see it. There is so little hope left in me and I feel so alone, even with my friends." He looked off into the distance, then faced me. I felt a few more tears fall. He gently brushed them off my face.
"Rinwethien,synthra uum nall. Ta rusvea mia ura a' elei lle e' awr". [Rinwethien, please do not cry. It breaks my heart to see you in pain.] His gaze was very tender.
"Legolas, amin uum rangw. Mani sa ta tanya lle quen?" [Legolas, I do not understand. What is it that you speak?]
He traced my jaw line with a finger. "Amin uume now' tanya lle neis oio tyav vell atya, dara', amin ant' a' ita lle..........amin mela lle." [I did not think that you could ever feel the same, but, I have to tell you........I love you.]
I was shocked. "lle del' itien mi sina durre?" [You are telling me this with faithfulness?] He nodded.
"Uma." [Yes] He gave me another very tender look. A smiled played across my lips.
"Lle um tyav vell atya isi amin?" [you do feel the same as I?] He asked with hope.
"Uma." [Yes] He grinned in satisfaction. "I am relieved. Its was tearing me apart not being able to tell you." He said. Then he came closer to my face until we were an inch apart.
"Legolas! Where are you?" called Aragorn. Legolas backed away, his face red. "I must go." I placed my hand on his. "It is alright." I said. He nodded and jogged off. I let out the breath I had been holding in. So close! Oh well, I had thought. There will be other times. I decided to stay for awhile, thinking about everything that had happened. Everything about him made me smile. His gentle and steady voice. His caring touch and loving glances. I had it bad, I was truly in love with him.