Mad About Starbuck

by Aliana

A (seemingly endless) soap opera with lots of action, drama, romance, and plain craziness!

2. Episode 2

MAD ABOUT STARBUCK - Episode 2

Okay, so Rey and I thought that that was the end of it. We'd amazed the other women cadets by actually pulling off our bet - at least to be able to actually spend time with Starbuck. No one, but no one, except for the three of us knew - or would ever learn - the truth about what had happened on the _Rising Star_ that evening. As far as I was concerned, those kisses were our very dear and special secret. As far as our fellow cadets were concerned, we had, yes, played Pyramid with our illustrious Squadron Leader, had helped to save the ship by extinguishing the fires and patching the tylium leaks, and had rescued the lieutenant. That much was common knowledge - and was being broadcast throughout the Fleet over the IFB.

Of course, our squadron mates continued to tease us - about having been with the Great Lieutenant and getting stuck putting out fires - but there was a new level of respect to their teasing. A bit of jealousy mixed with admiration. And no one teased us about all of our studying anymore.

The next day, we had a tactical class and a simulator run. That was our first chance to see Starbuck since watching him being whisked away on the gurney at the hands of that obviously disapproving med tech. Except for the small bandage that he wore on his forehead, he looked fine and was his usual jovial, joking, but still professional self. As a teacher he was great. He made many satirical comments and wise cracks at the expense of either himself , the other warriors, or his superiors, but never crossed the line between instructor and student. While some of the women cadets shameless, at times, tried to flirt with him, he always ignored them, and he remained the unflappable professional, occasionally even looking amused by some of the more blatant efforts.

There were, in fact, two women - Shyra and Nikki -- that, in our opinion, should have been tossed from the program long ago for some of the comments they made. Had the Fleet not been desperately short on pilots, I'm sure they would have been, too. Unfortunately, they were actually good at everything except their manners and understanding of "professional demeanor." And Starbuck, who was too nice to bother reporting their remarks, choose to ignore them and continue. Usually, one or the other would raise their hand to answer a straight-forward tactical question, but then add some totally inappropriate comment. Starbuck would pause, sigh slightly, then continue as if nothing had happened. The rest of us would glare at the offending cadet. But because of those two, Starbuck seemed especially careful about doing anything that remotely resembled "fraternizing" while in the role of instructor.

Thus, we were vastly surprised when, as we moved from the tactical class to the simulators, Starbuck stopped us in the hallway. He handed Reyana and me each a pass - a pass to the OC! -- and said, simply, "I have permission. 2000 tonight, okay?"

"Roger, we'll be there!" replied Reyana crisply, as I fumbled for words but couldn't get my tongue to work.

We continued on to the simulators as if nothing had happened. We couldn't miss, however, the sidelong glances we received from Shyra and Nikki. And Reyana, so help me, had to go and stick out her tongue at them when our instructor wasn't looking!

After that, it was strictly business. Our assignment was to practice maneuvers that we would be using on a real training mission the next day - flying real vipers on a real scouting mission to a real (but already scanned by the _Galactica_) planet to do real short-range scans! Our squadron had flown several practice flights to master launches and landings; now, it was time to advance. So tomorrow, our Fearless Leader would be leading his squadron of 8 cadets on their first actual mission . . Woohoo!!

I thought the day would never end. 2000 seemed weeks away. I truly had not expected any further interactions between Starbuck and us, other than our standard instructor/cadet role. In my mind it had been a wonderful experience, priceless, but a one-time deal. Back to business as it had been and probably should be. After all, the lieutenant was a veteran pilot, our instructor, and at least 10 yahrens older than we were. Inappropriate all the way around. I mean, "fraternizing" with members of your own squadron was one thing, given our emergency conditions; this just crossed too many boundaries that probably shouldn't be crossed. That's what my left brain, the logical and rational side, told me. My right brain, however, sent my heart fluttering, remembering that kiss and lamenting that almost-kiss, every time I looked at the lieutenant. Once just wasn't enough. My right brain was ready to say "Frak the boundaries." I had fallen totally, helpless 100% under the Starbuck charm.

So, as Reyana and I paused to show our passes at the door to the O.C. that evening, my heart was pounding in my chest, my feet ready to run the other way, and my right brain screaming, "More, more, more!" I was a wreck, in other words. I wondered how Reyana was feeling? *****

I was pretty nervous about the idea of going to the

Officers Club with Starbuck. I mean, I was nervous

just to be in the place surrounded by all those highly

skilled pilots. I don't think I could ever be as good

as half of them no matter how many centaurs I studied,

or simulations I ran. I knew I was out of my league.

And to be there with Starbuck, well, that was even

more daunting.

But there was no way I was going to let Aliana know

that. I was afraid if she knew just how shaky I was

about the whole thing, she would just back out and

we'd miss the opportunity to mingle with the pilots.

And we'd miss our opportunity to be with Starbuck. I

knew the time on the Rising Star was a once in a life

time thing. Maybe because of that knowledge I

certainly wasn't going to turn down any chance to be

near Starbuck, even if it meant pulling extra duty or

taking long patrols. Whatever it took to get close to

him I would do. I guess you could say I was under his

spell.

I knew our fellow cadets were just waiting for a

chance to give Aliana and I a good ribbing about the

whole Rising Star incident, and I loved how flashing

those passes to the Officers club just shut them right

up! It was worth it, this feeling like I was going to

be sick, just to shut them up!

I wish I could say that the evening was a total

thrill, but to be quite honest, in some ways it was

kind of boring. Starbuck was already there and waved

us over to a table which was very much out of the way.

He was there alone, and had our drinks waiting for

us. I guess I wanted to interact more with the other

pilots, to get in on a good discussion of piloting

techniques, or Cylon strategy. But instead, everyone

seemed to be just hanging out having a drink and

shooting the breeze. I swear I even heard one group

discussing how they were going to decorate the new

quarters they had been assigned, and another group was

discussing where to find the best civilian clothes.

It was like a bunch of old women sitting around at a

sewing bee. Not at all what I expected for the

infamous Officers Club.

Starbuck appeared as suave as ever, helping both of us

into our seats. It only took a milicenton for me to

realize that he had an agenda to this little meeting.

He pulled out a deck of pyramid cards and began firing

off questions about the different systems and

strategies we had researched to beat him at pyramid.

I'll give Starbuck credit though, it had the right

effect. Aliana went immediately from shy and

intimidated, to talkative and animated as she outlined

each system and strategy. Boy did she have a head for

figures as she laid out the various odds and ratios

for each system we had researched. Starbuck listened

attentively, silently nodding as he soaked up the

information. His eyes looked almost dreamy and I

thought to myself that maybe Aliana had him under HER

spell.

Starbuck didn't miss an opportunity to compliment me

on my card playing skills. He even offered me a puff

on one of his fumarellos. Aliana shot me a look, but

I couldn't help but to share a smoke with him. You

know, they smell better than they taste, and Starbuck

had a good time laughing at the faces I made with each

puff.

It appeared that the evening was winding down and we

had only been in the club for about a Centaur.

Starbuck was a perfect gentleman and began to thank us

for joining him and showing him how we had

*Starbucked* him. I knew it was our cue to say

something nice, or witty, and then to leave. Then

that would be that, the end to what could have been.

For some reason, I just couldn't let it go. Maybe it

was the dreamy look on Aliana's face, maybe it was the

longing I knew I had within myself, maybe it was the

too polite routine Starbuck was pulling, but I

couldn't help myself.

As Starbuck gave us our cue to end the evening by

saying, "Well, this has been fun." I interrupted him.

I leaned in close, locked my eyes on his and said,

"So why don't we all go over to the Rising Star again

some time, and play out that system again. Maybe this

time you could win and then we'd owe you a dinner

alone."

Aliana didn't miss a beat as she took Starbuck's hand

in hers and said, "It's a system that just can't

lose."

Starbuck swallowed, scanned the room quickly to see

who might be watching us, then answered so softly I

barely heard him, but I did hear him, "That's a bet

I'd like to make. I think that system could work."

He then said louder, "Ladies, I hate to have such a

delightful evening end, but we do have training

tomorrow. Let me escort you back to quarters."

We took our cue and stood to leave, Starbuck being the

gentleman and taking each of us by the arm to escort

us to the door. He was enjoying himself, the stares

he was getting from the other pilots as he walked us

to the door. He smiled at each of us a winning smile

that melted my heart, and for a moment we basked in

his happiness.

And then she walked into the room, and Starbuck's

smile fell faster than a downed raider. The blonde

med tech that had whisked him away in the landing bay

flashed Starbuck a rather wicked smile.

"So Starbuck, why don't you introduce me to your two

Cadets? That is so nice of you to offer them a drink

for saving you from such a nasty injury. Why without

them, you might have actually had a headache." She

said sarcastically.

"Now Cassie, you know it was more than that. Why,

these two ladies saved the Rising Star from certain

disaster. I certainly owed them a drink for their

daring heroics. Aliana, Reyana, I'd like you to meet

Med Tech Cassiopea."

The tension was too much for me. I caught on right

away that somehow this med tech was more to Starbuck

than just someone who treated his injuries on

occasion. The jealousy inside me flared. But I

didn't know what to do at that moment without causing

a scene. Lords bless Aliana, but sometimes she does

think quicker than I do. She said something that I'm

sure was proper and polite, then got us the out of

there.

I let her drag me as far as around the first corner

outside the club before I finally found my voice. And

what I said wasn't smart or rationale. What I

suggested was probably very stupid, but I wanted to

know what was going on. I wanted to see just how

Starbuck handled himself with this woman. I suggested

we sneak back into the club and watch the scene.

I expected an argument from Aliana. I expected her to

be her usual smart and logical self and to talk me out

of it. But instead, Aliana didn't say a word. She

shot me a very knowing look, and then quickly reversed

her direction and headed back towards the club.

We rounded the corner to the club and there they were.

We didn't have to spy, their voices were loud enough

for all to hear.

********

Starbuck had been amazed that he had actually gotten

Cassie to agree to step outside of the Officers Club

before she let him have it. He was pretty convinced

that she had planned to lay into him in front of all

his buddies, but she also recognized the hint of a

threat from Starbuck when he suggested that they had

better have this conversation in private, "Or else!"

At least Cassie had the decency to realize that this

was Starbuck's turf, where he went to avoid stress.

But she didn't wait much longer than the doorway to

begin to vent her anger.

"Starbuck, just what do you think you're doing?

Playing me and Athena off each other is one thing, but

this is something different! This is too much!

Besides, they are so young. You are going to end up

hurting them. Athena and I are big girls, we knew what

we were getting into."

"I'm not hurting anyone. Heck, this was their idea!"

Starbuck said defensively.

"You just don't get it Starbuck." Cassie said

exasperated.

"No, I think that's what has you so upset, I am

getting *it*!" Starbuck yelled.

They both glared at each other, and Starbuck realized

that he had crossed the line. He took a breath before

he went on, "Look Cassie, things aren't the same as

they used to be. Everything is different since we

lost the colonies, I mean everything. So who says our

relationships have to stay the same? If they don't

have a problem with it, then I don't have a problem

with it."

"Well I have a problem with it!"

"Fine." Starbuck said evenly, without a trace of

anger. "No one says you have to like it, or even deal

with it. You're the one who always is saying 'no

commitments'."

"I'm the one saying 'no commitments'? You're the one

who always said that!" Cassie said, now yelling.

Starbuck replied quietly, "No, I never *said* that.

You just assumed that." Cassie glared at him, but did

not respond. Starbuck knew he had her. He had so

avoided any conversation about commitment that they

hadn't even discussed their lack of one. He waited a

few more moments for Cassie to get her anger in

control as she also realized the truth of his

statement.

"Besides," Starbuck added, taking a step back and out

of firing range, "I don't think I'd have a problem

committing to the right situation. If I recall on

Gemon there were many sects where men took several

wives, and everyone was pretty happy with the

situation."

"Starbuck you're not Gemonese!" She yelled.

"Maybe I am? I am an orphan after all. Who knows

where I came from? I'm not Caprican anymore, there is

no Caprica now. Maybe we need to make up new rules

and new relationships." Starbuck said wistfully.

"Well you can hold your little meetings for your new

rules without me!" Cassie turned and stalked off.

"Uh, I kind of thought I was." Starbuck added lamely

to her retreating back.

Starbuck watched her retreat down the corridor and

wondered what he should do now. There was no point in

going back into the club. There would be way too many

people asking way too many questions that he just

didn't know how to answer.

"Frack, why does this have to be so complicated." He

said to himself, and turned to walk back to the

barracks.

**************** MAS - Ep II -- Part 3

I barely slept that night. Between the upcoming practice mission the next morning and the conversation that Reyana and I had overheard, my mind was way too preoccupied to be able to relax. It was the latter, mostly, that kept running through my head, and the thought that, incredibly, inconceivably . . . we had a chance. A chance to possibly, maybe, someday . . . turn fantasy into reality. The words kept repeating in my mind: "If they don't have a problem with it, then I don't have a problem with it."

In the morning our cadet squadron would be "exploring" our first planet, doing surveys and such, assessing our first new world. . . it looked like Reyana and I might get to explore "strange, new worlds" in more ways than one. And I amazed myself, because I would never, ever have considered an arrangement like this before . . . before we'd lost everything. Having your homeworld destroyed can change a person's perspective, though. Before, I was the kind of girl who wanted to find that one "perfect" person, get sealed, and build a long and lasting relationship, where two people bond and grow together, create a family, and are committed totally to one another.

Until this little game with Starbuck, I had not realized just how much the Holocaust had changed my perspective. With the future so much in doubt, I saw that I did not want any serious *commitments,* as in getting sealed. Now, it seemed more important to grasp hold of what positive things the Fates presented us and make the most of each moment, day by day. The future . . .? I seldom let my mind go there. It was just too uncertain.

So if Lieutenant Starbuck was ready to adventure into the realm of different possibilities, I was ready to accept this exciting new adventure! Seize the moment, because who knew what the future would bring for us. A shining new planet called Earth? Or total extermination through either the Cylons or even eventual starvation?

Enough! Too depressing! But that's why I found myself so willing and ready to defy the old expectations about relationships and just see where this might take us.

********* At 0700, Reyana and I found ourselves seated in the cockpits of our vipers, awaiting permission to launch. We had performed all pre-launch checks and were ready. Yes, ready . . . as ready as we could be, considering that this was our first true mission, where we did more than just launch, fly a few maneuvers, then land. We were responsible for taking detailed scans of the one planet in the nearby system that might be life-supporting. True, the _Galactica_ had already performed enough scans to deem it a safe training ground; although, we all knew that there were no guarantees out in these vast, uncharted regions of space.

Still, our mission was as safe as it could be. The star, Omicron Nu, had eleven planets, but only the fourth one might remotely support any kind of (known) life form. Preliminary scans from the _Galactica_, however, had revealed no indications of intelligent life. Our assignment was to confirm that reading and to determine if the planet had any resources that the Fleet could use. With the eight of us each assigned a different set of scans to perform, the entire mission would take only about three centars. While Reyana and I and six other cadets were designated Yellow Squadron for our training assignments, in this case, we would actually divide into two groups. Given our inexperience, Lieutenant Boomer, instructor for Green Squadron, would be assisting and would monitor one of the groups. The bonus, though, was that it permitted us to spread out and perform a greater range of planetary scans.

"Everyone understand their mission?" Starbuck's voice sounded through our comlinks.

"Roger," I answered, as did everyone else. Yes, I was ready. The scans were simple procedures. I felt confident now in my abilities to handle a viper; I was even beginning to enjoy the thrill of the high velocity launches that catapulted the ship out into the freedom of space. Reyana and I, along with cadets Jorden and Cesar, would be flying with Starbuck once we reached the planet. Shyra and Nikki, much to their chagrin, were with cadets Edward and Ramius in Lt. Boomer's group. I don't know exactly how we were divided - whether it had been random or the two lieutenants had sat around discussing who deserved whom - but Reyana and I were quite thrilled to be flying with our Fearless Leader, and *not* with Shyra and Nikki.

"Core command transferring control to vipers. Launch when ready."

That was our cue. With a deep breath, I thumbed the thruster button. The sudden acceleration pushed me back into my seat; we were off. Within three centons we were all tucked into the correct formation, more or less, with Starbuck in the lead and Boomer at the rear. Thus, while Starbuck flew ahead to verify that the system was still secure, we got to listen to Lieutenant Boomer attempt to keep us all grouped properly.

"Jorden, you're too close. Back off a few metrons." A pause. "Edward, hold 'er steady." Another pause. "Shyra, you're drifting out." And so on.

After about a centar, we were nearing the planet and were rejoined by Lieutenant Starbuck.

"Looks calm and quiet," he reported. "Okay, Squad B form on Boomer. You'll handle the northern hemisphere. Squad A form on me. We've got the southern. Let's proceed!" With that Starbuck rolled to the left and Boomer to the right. With a fair amount of grace, the eight of us followed suit and regrouped with our leader.

For Reyana and I, our first set of scans took ten centons and confirmed that, for our assigned quadrant, there was no evidence of habitation by intelligent life, even though the planet had a breathable atmosphere. Next, we would fly at increasingly lower levels, eventually penetrating the cloud cover and skimming the surface, to obtain as many details about the planet's compostion as possible. With luck, we would find resources to help replenish those of the Fleet.

As the four of us surveyed our specific sector of the planet, Lieutenant Starbuck hung back and basically just watched, evaluating our flying skills and answering any questions we might have. It was by luck - or lack thereof - that I would be the first of either group to penetrate the planet's exosphere. Up to that point, my readings had shown nothing of much relevance. In fact, as I studied the figures and descriptions that scrolled across my screen, something seemed slightly . . . off. It was just a feeling, nothing that I could pinpoint, yet. And it certainly didn't prepare me for what happened the moment my ship broke into the outer atmosphere.

Without warning, every system in my viper went crazy. The comline exploded with static, my panel blinked frantically, but worse - much, much worse - my engines sputtered and died.

I learned later that I was hit by a series of electromagnetic pulses that created some kind of shield throughout the atmosphere. I also learned that Reyana, who was microns behind me, somehow reacted quickly enough and was able to pull up sharply, escaping the worst of the electronic mayhem. She still had communications and a few more functioning systems. Thus, she was able to pinpoint the coordinates of the pulses. On top of the situation almost instantly, Starbuck issued an immediate recall order - all cadets were to form on Boomer pull out until he could assess the situation. Operating blindly, since scanner readings obviously didn't match what was actually on the planet's surface, he then targeted the coordinates of the electromagnetic pulses and let loose with his lasers. He must have hit something because the pulses stopped.

All this I learned later, though. At the time, I was trying desperately not to panic as I worked frantically to restart my engines. The static was so deafening that I had to shut down the comline. In the sudden quiet, broken only by my gasping breaths and the pounding of my heart, I was better able to focus on all of the emergency procedures on which we had been drilled and drilled. Nothing. Nothing. The panic was increasing, my hands beginning to shake. The viper was losing speed and altitude and would soon start spiriling towards the surface of the planet. I gulped and swallowed hard. I swore and prayed and banged the panel. Nothing.

Then the screen stopped flashing erratically. I retried the basic procedures. The engines sputtered and sparked, sputtered some more. Then the starboard and port engines both went dead again, leaving only the third one operational. It would have to do, because I was losing altitude now much too quickly.

"Oh, frak, oh, frak, oh, frak," I muttered as I tried to regain control and level the ship off. Stabilizers weren't working. The one engine didn't have enough power to break my descent completely. I got the nose up and on an even keel, but I was going down. Down. One way or another.

"May day! May day!" I started screaming into the comlink - until I remembered that I had switched it off. I jabbed the button. "Frak, I'm going down!" I screamed, not knowing if the line were even operational.

"Try to hold her steady! Keep the nose up!" came Starbuck's voice.

I broke through the cloud cover. Below, approaching rapidly - too rapidly - was what seemed to be a wide, grassy plain. Oh, thank the Lords of Kobol for that! "Oh, frak, oh frak, oh frak . . ." I had stopped listening to the instructions - the actual words -- that Lieutenant Starbuck continued to give, but the firm, yet calm, tone of his voice eased my panic enough for me to concentrate on bringing the ship down in one piece.

With what seemed like a sudden rush, the viper hit the ground, bounced up, hit again. I hit the reverse thrusters . . . what little I had. The ship bounced and skidded across the grassy plain. Then hit - who knows what - and flipped over. The world started spinning wildly and I was slammed in all directions, screaming madly, I think, until everything went black . . .

**********

PART 4

The mission started off easy. I'm always amazed at

how flying an actual viper is really not that

difficult compared to all the simulations and

scenarios. Once you get launched, it's just a matter

of keeping the thrust at the right level, watching

your angle, and well, you can just feel what is right

and what is wrong. Kind of like sailing a boat on the

sea. It can look difficult with all the rigging,

pulleys and sails, but once you get out on the water,

it all comes easy.

So I was having a good time on the mission, getting

the feel of my viper. The scans were interesting. It

was like solving a puzzle that was all about the

planet. As the information rolled in it was

exhilarating to realize that the planet could be

useful to the fleet. It felt great knowing that even

though it was a training mission, we were still making

a difference. The resources found on the planet,

tylium, metals, plants and animals, would make life

better in the fleet. It was more than we had hoped.

I had actually relaxed and forgot for a moment that it

was a mission where my instructors were grading my

performance. I relaxed and just let the viper fly

itself.

That's when it all went to hades. Aliana and I were

headed in for a closer look, Aliana in the lead. Just

as she entered the exosphere, every screen, light,

gauge and dial in my Viper jumped. It was blinding as

all my alarms lit up and instinctively I pulled the

stick up, nosing my craft out of the atmosphere. My

com gave a sharp burst of static nearly deafening me.

Then all my instruments went dead for a heart stopping

moment. I started to panic and began flipping

switches and pushing buttons when just as mysteriously

some of my systems came back on, functioning normally

as if nothing had happened. I didn't have time to

figure out what systems were dead. I shot past Aliana

and saw that her engines were dead. She was rapidly

dropping into the atmosphere.

"Whoa, Starbuck, We've got a problem here!" I

panicked. It felt like my voice came out in slow

motion. I was told later that I was actually talking

so fast that I was barely understood. "Aliana's

engines are dead!"

"I see that. I'm on it." Starbuck replied as if he

was distracted.

I quickly scanned my instruments and saw that I still

had scanners and communications, but my fuel gauges,

engine thrust levels and naviagation were dead. I

pulled on the stick and got a response in the right

direction, but my craft responded slowly. As soon as

I released the stick, the nose of the viper dipped

back down towards the surface. I realized I was being

pulled in, but not nearly as quickly as Aliana. She

was dropping towards the surface like a rock.

"Starbuck, she's going down!!" I yelled into the com.

"I see it. What's your status?"

"Do something!!"

"Reyana, calm down! Do you have power and control?"

Starbuck was firm, but calm.

I took a deep breath before answering, trying not to

panic. "Yes, but it's sluggish. I think I can pull

away from the planet, but I don't have navigation."

Just then my scanner started flashing an alarm.

"Starbuck, my scanner says that there's something on

the planet that's transmitting!"

Then suddenly my scanner went dead and my engines

sputtered. "Starbuck, whatever is transmitting just

knocked out my scanner and is effecting my engines!"

"Where was it located?"

"Uh.southern hemisphere, near the pole I think."

"I see it." Starbuck pulled up near me and began

firing off a volley of laser fire in the direction of

the transmission. On the planet there was a flash of

explosion, and I could see debris flying.

"Okay, that problem is solved. All vipers, return to

the Galactica." Starbuck ordered.

"I should stay behind, looks like you need some help

Starbuck." Boomer replied.

"No I got it. You need to get back with the cadets

and report our findings. Send out a shuttle as soon

as you can, it looks like we're going to need a

pickup." Starbuck answered.

"Maybe I should stay behind until she's down." Boomer

countered.

"Would you quit debating and do something!" I yelled

at the two, not bothering to consider their ranks or

that I might be out of line.

Just then the comline exploded with static and

Aliana's voice came through shrill and frightened. I

know I'll have nightmares about her voice screaming

over my com. "Frak, I'm going down!"

"Try to hold her steady! Keep the nose up!" came

Starbuck's voice.

"I can't! It won't respond! I'm going down!" Aliana

screamed again.

I pulled on the stick and started manuvering my Viper

towards Aliana's coordinates. It was like flying

through wet cement, taking forever to complete the

simple right turn. My engines kept sputtering and

without my gauges I couldn't tell what was wrong. I

didn't want to risk a restart without all my

instruments for fear I'd wind up in the same position

as Aliana, crash landing with no power.

Starbuck's voice continued to come over the com as he

ran through the procedures for a crash landing. He

calmly told her what switches to try and how to use

her one engine to try to level herself out. I'm not

sure she heard a word he said because she was no

longer transmitting. I held my breath and watched as

she dropped towards the surface.

"Good, she's landing somewhere level." Starbuck

whispered in the com. "Lords please let it be soft

too."

At the last minute we saw that she was able to get the

nose of her viper up, and she skidded across the

valley floor like a stone on a lake, bouncing once,

twice, a third time before we saw a large plume of

rocks and dust.

"Is she okay?" I whispered afraid of what the answer

might be.

"Hard to tell from here. Boomer, I'm going down to

check on Cadet Aliana. You head on back to the

Galactica and send us back a rescue. Reyana, you head

back with Lt. Boomer." Starbuck said.

I tried to pull up my viper, really I did try. I know

everyone thought that I headed down toward the surface

because Aliana is my best friend, but believe me, I

was ready to head back for home. I was convinced that

I had lost her. The last thing I wanted to do was to

go down and check out how mangled she and her viper

were. I couldn't face the thought of losing her. She

was like family, the only family I had now. I just

wanted to head back with Lt. Boomer and the rest of

the cadets and pretend that nothing had happened.

But my viper wouldn't go up. Oh it was happy to go

down, and with a little nudging would go left or go

right, but not up.

"Cadet Reyana, did you hear my order?" Starbuck asked

in a stern voice.

"Uh, yes sir, but I don't think my viper heard your

order. I can't get my nose up. I can manuver

slightly, but I'm headed down too."

"It looks like one of your engines is out. Are your

systems still out?"

"Yeah, too many out. Maybe I should just tell you

what I have on. It would be quicker."

"Okay Boomer, make that a rescue shuttle for three."

"Okay Bucko, be back in a flash. Do you need me to

hang out till you're down?"

"Naw, I think we'll be okay, you still have power,

right Cadet?"

"Yeah, I think I can land okay, I just can't break

free is all." I replied trying to sound confident,

but to be quite honest I was scared. Landing on the

Galactica is one thing. You just have to get it

through the slot and well, the Battlestar kind of

takes over after that. But landing on a planet? I

hadn't tried that yet, just in simulation, and even

then, I wasn't that great at it.

"Okay Starbuck, back in flash." Boomer formed up the

cadets and zoomed back towards the Galactica.

"Okay Cadet, let's take her in. Just follow me down.

Nothing fancy. Just put her down wherever you can."

Starbuck said using his most confident instructor

voice.

"Okay, but don't grade this one."

Starbuck laughed. "I'm not taking points off for

neatness. Just follow me in and you'll be fine."

It wasn't neat. It wasn't pretty, but I was able to

bring my viper down in one piece, well minus a fin or

two. I think I crumpled the port side landing gear

too. I'm really going to get it from the deck crew.

They grudgingly had given me on of their newest vipers

that day. Well, Starbuck said that someone had to put

the first dent in them.

Starbuck was already out of his viper and running

towards the wreckage of Aliana's craft. I started to

open my canopy and stopped. I guess I wanted to know

what to be ready for, so I sat and watched Starbuck

approach Aliana. I knew that I could tell by his body

language whether there was hope, or if she was gone.

Starbuck ran up and hastily pulled the canopy aside.

He flung the canopy as if it were made of paper. He

reached down and began pulling Aliana from the

cockpit. Her hair was matted with blood, but I could

tell by the how fast Starbuck moved that all was not

lost. I quickly popped my canopy and ran to join him.



By the time I reached him he had Aliana on the ground

and was assessing her injuries. It was bad, but she

was breathing. I tried to look beyond the blood that

was now coating Starbuck's hand and jacket. Her head

was bleeding and her right shoulder had a nasty open

wound where the blood was bubbling. There was blood

all down her pant legs, but as Starbuck and I

wordlessly checked her, her legs appeared to be fine.

"I think it's just blood from her shoulder." I said.
"She's punctured a lung. Probably by a broken rib.

Run and get a medkit." Starbuck said, stripping off

his jacket and laying it across her legs. I ran for

his viper since it was closer and rummaged through his

cockpit for the kit. It was not in the same place as

it is in my viper, and I noticed he had a nice layer

of fumarello butts on the floor of his viper.

I ran back, ripping the seals on the kit, searching

for a pressure bandage. If we couldn't get the wound

on her shoulder sealed, she would slowly asphyxiate

from a collapsed lung. Starbuck had ripped off one of

the sleeves on his shirt and was pressing it against

the wound on her head. I opened up the pressure

bandage and applied it to her shoulder. Starbuck

placed his hands over mine, applying more pressure to

the wound. Aliana winced and moaned, starting to come

around.

"Hang in there Aliana. You're going to be okay."

Starbuck said soothingly "Rey, why don't you look in

the medkit and see if you can find some painkillers."

I removed my hands from the wound and found the

syringe. I gave her the full dose.

"There's two more in there, and then that's it."

"Why don't you check her viper and yours for another

medkit." Starbuck looked at Aliana, then turned to

me. His voice was calm, but his eyes were desperate.

"We're going to need it."

*********

PART 5

Pain was my first perception after the crash - incredible pain, unlike any I had ever felt before. For the first several centars after the crash, I drifted in and out of consciousness, until the painkillers reduced everything to a steady but mostly dull ache . . . if I did not move. Movement sent an intense, stabbing pain through my chest. My arm throbbed, as did my head. Most of my concentration was spent trying to breath in slow, shallow breaths to avoid the sensation of being drilled with a knife.

Both Starbuck and Reyana had been talking to me, and I may have responded, but my first solid memory was gradually hearing the two conversing quietly as I lay with my eyes closed, my mind floating from dream-fill sleep, to random thoughts and memories, to bits and pieces of what was actually going on. I had remembered the crash and what had caused it, by then, but everything after that point was still the jumbled mass of sensations and thoughts. Eventually, I was able to focus on the two voices, two comforting voices, so close by. I kept my eyes closed, though, just wanting to listen and try to understand what was going on now.

"How's she doing?" Starbuck asked.

"Stable," answered Reyana, "and she seems to be sleeping." It was comforting to hear her voice. She was like a sister to me - we were the only family we each had, having lost everything and everyone in the Holocaust. I *knew* that had I not somehow let myself open up to her, during those first horrible sectons aboard that rickety freighter, well . . . I'm sure I would have given up all hope. So hearing her voice was a great relief and kept me calm. She continued. "What'd you find out?" She was speaking quietly, trying not to wake me, I'm sure.

I heard a sigh. "Several things. Both good and bad news." I heard movement, as if Starbuck were sitting down on the ground.

"Yes? What?" Reyana, ever the impatient one, asked.

Another sigh. "Okay, I got a message from the Galactica, a short, scrambled signal. They'll be sending a shuttle soon, but first they have to get a better understanding of where that electromagnetic transmission came from. Assess the danger to the Fleet, of course. They hope to have a shuttle here within the next ten centars. If possible."

"Is that the good news or the bad news?" I could hear the concern under Reyana's joking voice.

"Ah . . . that's the good news."

This time Reyana sighed. "That's what I was afraid of. Okay, spill it, Lieutenant!"

"I ran as detailed scans as I could. Wish I could transmit them back to the Galactica, but that would be too risky. I'm sure they'll figure it out here, soon, anyway -"

"What!" Reyana was getting impatient as Starbuck was obviously hesitating about telling her something.

"This planet has higher levels of radion - just beyond acceptable levels, at least here where we are. We should be okay, though, for at least a day."

"And?"

"My readings indicated structures - possibly a city -- about a kilometron away. No signs of life, but the radion may be scrambling the sensors. I can't be sure. If there is someone there, they probably noticed us. We *did* penetrate their defenses, after all. That's the other thing - most of the planet seems to be shielded. I knocked out part of it, but it'll still make it hard for the Galactica to get accurate readings. It may delay the shuttle . . ."

I could sense Reyana's rising fear. "Do we need to find a safer place? What if the native inhabitants come looking for us?"

Starbuck's reply, so calm and matter-of-fact, sent a chill through me as I listened. "We've got no place to go that'd be any safer than here. And if we try to move Aliana, it could make her injuries even worse. We'll just have to take our chances and settle in and wait. Besides, we don't even know if --"

I couldn't help it. The acute fear that we might not be safe here - that an unknown group of people or aliens, who had obviously *not* wanted anyone to find them, given the shielding, might come looking for us - made my heart race. I felt short of breath and gasped. Which was a very bad idea. The pain shot through my chest, and I let out a cry that turned into a gag, then coughing. I felt out of control as each involuntary cough, each spasm, stabbed with an intense, burning sensation. I felt like I was choking and suffocating. I was certainly panicking at that point.

"Calm down! Calm down!" I felt a firm touch on my shoulders. Saw Starbuck's face above mine. Felt a hand at my forehead as he and Reyana tried to settle me. "Calm down, calm down," he repeated. His voice was getting slower, firm but steady, soothing, as I finally focused on the tone. And the words. "Breath slowly," he said, "slowly, slowly, calm . . . calm . . .calm. Easy, easy. . ."

My breathing matched his voice, steady now. The pain was subsiding back to the dull throbbing. I gazed up into Starbuck's face. His expression was reassuring, but I could see the concern in his eyes. Lords, but those blue eyes spoke volumes! Despite his steady voice and outward calm, I could sense just how worried he was. And . . . how guilty he felt. Lords, but I knew at that instance that he felt responsible for me and our predicament. A bit of stubborn anger did a lot to vanquish my panic and fears.

"It wasn't your fault," I whispered.

"What?" he said.

And - damn! - but I felt tears welling, tears of frustration and simple release. I wanted to explain, to say, to shout, at him that he was crazy to feel responsible when even the Galactica had not detected the shielding. There had been no way to know. No way to anticipate that entering the atmosphere would trigger the shielding. And that I knew the risks when I signed up to be a warrior - it was part of the job description! - and just because I hadn't actually graduated to ensign yet - that didn't make him any more responsible for me or for what had happened.

Instead, I managed to keep my breathing steady, blinked back the tears, and whispered again, speaking the words slowly, with each breath, "It wasn't your fault."

He was gazing at me with a serious expression, no trace of the normal, jovial Starbuck; I had targeted his feelings precisely and had caught him completely off guard. He tried to shake it off and brush off my statement, though, by smiling and saying, "Hey, good of you to join us again. How are you feeling?" He brushed the hair off my face, my forehead. The touch was very soothing. And pleasant, relaxing.

"Terrible," I answered. Turned my head slightly and saw Reyana on the other side of me, looking just as concerned. "But, not so bad if I don't move."

Reyana was staring from me to the lieutenant. She was very perceptive, as well, and had picked up his reaction, too. "She's right, you know."

"I think we need to think about setting up a shelter -"

"Stop avoiding the issue!" Whoa . . . Reyana could cut through the felgercarb, when she wanted to.

I watched the two from my position. I couldn't see their faces, exactly, when he looked at her, but I could sense the body language, saw him stiffen a bit. "I'm not avoiding anything. We need to prepare for the night, since we don't know when a shuttle might -"

"It's *not* your fault," she said firmly.

"Reyana, we need -"

"We'll get to that in a moment," she insisted. Bless her, but she could almost read my mind, sometimes. "How can you possibly think that this is your fault?"

I could see the tenseness in his jaw. "Because as your squadron commander, it's my *job* to make sure that you - the cadets, I mean - are safe. Obviously, I failed on that point -"

"Men," Reyana grumbled. I saw his jaw drop. She was looking at me, though, ignoring his surprised expression. "Why do they always think that they should somehow be able to *control* everything? Life just doesn't work that way, does it? Felgercarb happens, you know. And there isn't a darn thing anyone do about it. Why can't men just *accept* that?"

Lords, I wanted to laugh, but had enough sense not to. My fears had diminished once I realized that had anyone been around to find us, they would have done so by then. Common sense - now that I could think somewhat clearly - told me that the "no life signs" reading was most likely accurate. The high radion levels, had we had the time to consider it right then and there, were a fair indicator of what had probably happened on the planet. Later, we would all learn from the Galactica's detailed scans that this planet had been devastated by a global catastrophe - nuclear war, most likely. The atmospheric shielding was the lonely reminder of how advanced this civilization had once been.

At the moment, though, I just sensed that we were in no immediate danger, so I could relax some. I looked at Reyana and smiled weakly. "So true, so true . . ."

"Look, I - I don't - It isn't -" Starbuck sputtered.

Reyana was not letting up. "This was an *accident,* okay? Unforeseeable. Besides, we're big girls. We knew the risks when we joined the Colonial service."

Gee, but Starbuck had a stubborn streak, too. "That's beside the point. I'm your trainer, your instructor, so you're still my responsibility until you've passed all the exams and graduated. So regardless of the circumstances, it's my job to keep you safe."

"And you did," I whispered. Starbuck looked down at me. He was still stroking the side of my face, brushing back my hair in a way that felt so soothing, so . . . nice. When he didn't say anything, I continued, "It was your calm, cool, rock-steady voice that got me to concentrate on my training. You're the only reason I didn't just go splat into this planet. You saved my life . . ." I was gazing into those expressive blue eyes. By the Lords of Kobol, maybe I should get hurt more often, because my senses were keenly attuned at that moment. As I looked up into his eyes, I realized, suddenly, that his concern was deeper than just that of instructor/cadet.

I broke the gaze to glance at Reyana, who was also uncharacteristically quiet at that moment. She, too, was sensing an undercurrent . . .
********** PART 6 "Look, it's more than that." Starbuck said, turning

to look at me, then he looked away. "Uh, I mean, than

just being your instructor." Starbuck looked at

Aliana again. " I mean."

Starbuck took his hand away from Aliana and ran it

through his hair, pulling his bangs from his eyes. It

was a gesture I had noticed he only does when he is

frustrated and trying to find a solution. He looked

down at the ground as he fumbled for words. "I mean,

there's more to it than that. It's just, you see..."

Starbuck started again.

My heart leapt and my head got dizzy. In my wildest

dreams I never thought that this could get serious.

But this was as serious as it gets. Aliana hurt,

stuck on a potentially deadly planet, and Starbuck

about to declare his feelings. I was scared, more

terrified than I have probably ever been.

"We know. Don't say anything more okay? We know.

You know, let's talk about this later okay? Over

dinner with a glass of ambrosia and soft music

playing. But not here, okay?" I almost pleaded.

Aliana looked at me worriedly. Then pain crossed her

features and I became even more scared. "We need to

get a shelter up."

I turned and walked away from the two of them and

headed for my viper to get the rest of the supplies.

About halfway there Starbuck caught up to me. He took

my arm and stopped me.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah, perfect. Never had a better day in my life, oh

yeah, there was that day my homeworld was destroyed.

But yeah, everything's fine. Look, we need to get

that shelter up, it's going to get cold." I wouldn't

look at him, and he gently took my chin in his hand

and brought my face up.

"Are you okay?" He said looking in my eyes. It was

that worried look on his face, the one so far he had

reserved for Aliana, that made me answer him. A smart

remark was on the tip of my tongue, but I swallowed it

down.

"Yeah, sorry, it's just this is not exactly how I had

things planned, you know?"

"Yeah, I know, but life rarely goes as planned, at

least in my life anyway." Starbuck took his hand from

my face, but continued to gaze into my eyes. "If

you're not comfortable with this, I understand. I

won't pursue it."

"No, no, no.that's not what I meant!" Starbuck looked

confused, then relieved as I continued. "I mean, I

want us to discuss all this somewhere romantic, some

place, oh I don't know, nice I guess. Not on a radion

rock with hostile inhabitants and, well, not like

this. That's what I meant. I wanted it to be perfect

and then you wouldn't have any doubts about this all

working out."

"Hey, what can be more romantic than alone on a

starlit night with a sense of danger. If you ask me,

this is perfect!" He smiled at me, then glanced over

his shoulder and dropped the grin. "Well, except for

Aliana being hurt. Yeah, not exactly as planned. But

didn't we decide we'd take our moments where we found

them? That life is too short to let this go by?"

"Yes, but its going to get even shorter if we don't

get a shelter up and get rescued."

"Okay, okay.and everyone says I avoid issues." I shot

Starbuck an angry look and he put his hands up in

defeat. "Okay, we'll talk about it later, I promise.

When we get back safe and sound."

"If we get back." I said.

"WHEN we get back." Starbuck countered firmly. He

then did something I did not anticipate. He reached

for me and took me in his arms. It was just a hug. A

simple hug between friends that lasted for only a

moment. But in that moment, I felt all the walls

around my heart melt. We broke the embrace and

Starbuck said softly, "No doubts." Then he turned and

walked back to check on Aliana. I walked towards my

viper to get the supplies, my head reeling from what

my heart was telling me.

As I walked back I could see Starbuck and Aliana

talking, but I couldn't hear them. Starbuck was

checking her wound and also stroking her face to keep

her calm and conscious. I interrupted them as I

spread a blanket over Aliana and began to construct

the shelter. Starbuck got up to get the rest of the

supplies and to see if there were any left in the

ruins of Aliana's viper. I finished the shelter, such

as it was, and stepped inside to check on my friend.

She was pale, too pale, but at least she didn't appear

to be in too much pain. Her eyes were closed and it

looked like she was sleeping rather than unconscious.

I reached down to remove one of the jackets that was

covering her to ball it up and put under head as a

pillow. She awoke with the movement.

"Are you okay?" She asked me.

"Um, last I checked, you're the one that's hurt. Are

you okay?"

"Yes." She whispered. "I mean, it hurts, but it's

not that bad." She looked up at me concerned and

asked, "Are you okay with all this, because he wants

to give it a try." Aliana looked elated for a moment,

then concern creased her features again.

"Yes, I am. Heck, I think this was my idea. Be

careful what you wish for, right? Yeah, I'm okay.

It's just not the greatest time to talk about it right

now. I think we need to concentrate on getting you

back and getting you patched up."

"Don't worry, we'll work this all out and take it

slow." Aliana said, then gasped for another breath.

"Okay, okay, but right now, let's worry about you.

Because I sort of need you along for the fun, okay? I

mean, who else can I talk to about Starbuck? Who else

would believe that I beat him at cards?"

Aliana tried to laugh, and ended up coughing instead.

"Easy there." I said, reaching to get out more

painkillers.

"I'm okay." She said, getting control of her

breathing. "But I don't believe you beat him at

cards, I believe that was me."

"What? You have got to be joking, I mean if I hadn't

have taken that one hand, he would have definitely

beaten yours."

"If I recall you were losing hands."

"Well yeah, to get him all confident so we could take

him when he least expected it."

"Oh, was that it." She smiled and I relaxed for the

first time since the strange pulses that put Aliana in

this condition.

Starbuck entered the shelter, bringing with him two

more blankets, rations, and producing from behind his

back, a bottle of ambrosia. "Ta da!" He said with a

flourish. He popped the cork and took a swig.

"Ladies" he said, offering me the bottle.

"Where did you get this?" I asked looking at the

label that claimed the bottle was over a hundred

yahrens old. I helped Aliana take a drink before

taking one myself.

"Oh, there was this time I crash landed on some penal

colony that just happened to make ambrosia. I keep it

stashed for when I land on cold and lonely planets,

you know, to remind myself that sometimes I do get

lucky." He smiled his winning smile. He draped

another blanket over Aliana and snuggled in on the

other side of her in our small shelter, and we waited

for a rescue.

As the sun set the temperature dropped to below

freezing. The wind picked up. As it howled across

the open valley, there were several times in the night

that a gust would startle us. Often I thought I heard

voices. But as I strained to hear what they were

saying, it would suddenly stop. Starbuck kept watch

most of the night, telling me to sleep and not to

worry. But he kept his lazer drawn.

Aliana slept most of the night thanks to the

painkillers and the ambrosia. Probably not the

smartest thing we could do, but if it took more than a

day for them to rescue us, we would run out of

painkillers. Starbuck and I decided a good nights

sleep would do Aliana good before having to face the

pain. She was too weak to argue with us, although she

tried.

We snuggled close to each other for warmth. Starbuck

left us at least ten times, to check outside the

shelter to see if anything or anyone was out there.

He must have heard the voices too, but each time he

came back in he would mutter, "Just the wind." I

wasn't entirely convinced it was just the wind. The

words at times were too distinct just to be the wind

howling. But I couldn't make them out.

"Do you hear that?" Aliana said at one point, having

been awakened by a wind gust.

"It's just your imagination." Starbuck said, and

smoothed the blankets around her, stroking her hair

until she fell asleep. Then he got up once again to

check outside the shelter.

He came back a few cenons later, muttering under his

breath.

"Driving you nuts too, huh?" I whispered in the dark.

"So it's not just me that's hearing it." He stated.

"I think it's just the wind, right?"

"I can't find anything to suggest otherwise. Try to

sleep."

"Okay." I whispered, then drew my lazer.
************* PART 7

With the amount of painkillers they'd given me and the small bit ambrosa to boot, I should have slept, dead to the world. But every time I reached a true sleep, an involuntary movement or breath sent my chest throbbing. And in those waking moments, as groggy as I was, I could still sense that Starbuck and Reyana were worried about something. Something . . . At one point, when the winds had blown shrieking through our makeshift tent, I could have sworn I heard voices, but I was too drowsy to be sure. And Starbuck insisted that it had been the wind, just the wind. Still, I could sense that Starbuck and Reyana were tense.

The night seemed like one of the longest and coldest that I can recall. Despite the blankets, I eventually started to feel chilled straight through to the core and began to shiver uncontrollably. Which hurt like hades. I think it was towards morning. I remember Reyana and Starbuck talking, discussing something; I was in too much pain to focus on the words, but the worry came through loud and clear. Finally, since the blankets were having no effect, they took the only course of action they could -- Reyana and Starbuck laid down, one on each side of me, on their sides, so that they formed a warm, human cocoon round me. I was on my back, so they were able to entwine their arms together above - but not touching - my chest. With the blankets wrapped tightly around the three of us, I soon felt so warm and snug that the pain subsided and I finally drifted back to sleep.

The next sound I heard, the one that startled me awake, was definitely a voice, a loud voice directly outside the shelter. I jumped and gave a short gasp, but was aware enough to calm myself and avoid moving any further. As the stabbing pain faded, I realized that Reyana and Starbuck, who must have been exhausted, having been awake most of the night, were still asleep. Well, at least I thought they were until Starbuck whispered in my ear, "Take it easy. It's all right. Shhhh . . ."

"But I heard --"

"I know, I know. But it's okay," he said softly. I glanced at him and he was smiling. "Help's arrived. The shuttle. Just let me just get up carefully -"

I realized that Reyana *was* still asleep. I also noticed that our feet and legs were rather tangled up. Starbuck had just started to carefully pull himself free when someone flung the shelter flap aside, sending the sunlight flooding in.

"What?!" Reyana almost jumped up, but Starbuck's firm grasp stopped her. He knew that the painkillers had worn off and any undue movements - as I had already discovered - hurt. Extremely. Even her mild jerk made me gasp and groan.

"Help's arrived," he repeated. "It's okay. Just don't move until I can get these blankets off."

So we were still firmly and completely entwined when our rescuers entered the tent. I heard a snort and then lieutenant Boomer's deep voice, "They're here, all right!"

More movement, footsteps. Starbuck was trying to undo the blanket without bumping me. It was very slow going. "Lieutenant!" I recognized that as the voice of Captain Apollo. Starbuck's superior. I got a sudden uneasy feeling and felt acutely self conscious.

"Uh, Boomer, Apollo, and, uh . . ." Starbuck had finally pulled the tucked- in ends out from under us and was extracting himself, carefully. "Glad you could make it!" Reyana also slipped out from under the covers and stood up, rather quickly, I noticed.

With the blankets pulled down now, I could see the two warriors standing just inside the shelter, staring at us. Behind them stood the medtech - it was Cassiopeia, and her expression was slowly fading from wide-eyed to stony. Boomer had a lopsided, amused grin on his face. The captain looked stern and - I'd have to call it upset. I didn't yet know about the depth of their friendship, so there was an aspect to his expression that I just couldn't interpret.

Boomer was chuckling. "Way to go, Bucko!" he said.

"Lieutenant -" The captain sounded ready to issue a reprimand, but Starbuck interrupted him.

"Apollo, Cassiopeia," Starbuck said, pointing at me. "She needs immediate medical attention, so the sooner we get her back to the _Galacica_, the better. And for the record, this was the *only* way to prevent her from going into shock. It was damned cold last night!" Lords, but he sounded angry. And defensive. Was he in trouble again?

*********** Thank the stars that they had brought a medtech with them, even if it was *her,* because the moment they tried to lift me onto the stretcher, I cried out. Everything hurt, but especially my chest; it felt as if someone had drilled a knife straight through me. I felt dizzy and nauseous. I was gasping, but it felt as if I was suddenly in a vacuum. I could not get any air. I was panicking. Starbuck was above me, brushing my forehead with his hand- I couldn't hear his voice, although his mouth was moving. A loud hum was filling my ears, my vision was blurring, splintering . . .

I remembered bits and pieces from the shuttle ride back to the _Galactica_, voices, swatches of conversations, faces, mostly random images and sensations. Reyana sat right next to me, and so did Starbuck, holding my hand, because I remembered the comforting warmth of his touch. And Cassiopeia, in spite of everything or how she might have been feeling, kept herself professional, for the most part, from what little I recalled. At one point, after a nasty coughing fit that had sent me into pain-filled spasms and gasping for breath, Starbuck had asked her if I would be all right.

Her response had been soft and serious. "The sooner we get her aboard the _Galactica_, the better." She had paused. My eyes were closed, so I don't think she knew I could hear her. "Starbuck," she had said, "Regardless of what might be going on--" She paused again, to steady her voice, it seemed. "You and the cadet here probably saved her life by keeping her warm last night. The _Galactica's_ readings had indicated that the temperature had dropped considerably after dark. We were worried about the unavoidable delay. About what we might find when we finally got there. I was just caught off guard, okay?"

"You and Apollo both," Starbuck grumbled. Then he said quickly but seriously, "Thanks, Cassie."

"I won't ask about the bottle of ambrosa, though." She had to add that. Even in my semi-conscious state, her underlying anger was quite evident.

I don't know if Starbuck responded or if any more was said, because after that, I drifted off.

And woke up to find myself in the lifestation, feeling totally disoriented. I had no idea how long it had been, whether a couple of centars had passed . . . or several days. My arm was bandaged, as were my head and chest. At first, I could not figure out where I was, even, and did not remember the crash. As I struggled to make sense of everything, I felt a rising panic. . .

************************ PART 8 Thank the Lords it didn't take that long to get to the

Galactica. Aliana had me terrified the way she kept

gasping for air and I could tell she was in a lot of

pain. The med tech kept reassuring me that she was

okay, that she was getting enough air. I could tell

she was just saying those things to keep me calm.

Starbuck worked on keeping Aliana calm.

Once we reached the Galactica they allowed me and

Starbuck to accompany Aliana as far as the Life

Center, then they took her to surgery. I felt better

when the Doctor assured me that she would be fine and

that I could wait if I wanted. He was a crusty old

geezer that I knew wouldn't sugar coat anything. The

med tech, Cassiopea, tried to give me a "See, I told

you everything would be fine." look. "Why don't you

clean up." She said. "She will be in surgery for a

few centaurs." But I wasn't leaving. Not until I

knew my friend was okay. She tried to shoo Starbuck

away too, but he wasn't budging either.

So he and I waited outside the Life Center . For a

while we didn't say anything, just stood there in our

own thoughts. Neither of us had gotten much sleep.

After the rough landing and laying on the ground, we

were both pretty dirty. Starbuck looked pretty rough.

Both the sleeves were missing from his uniform, as he

had torn the other one off in the night to use as a

bandage. His tunic was smeared with dried blood, and

his hair almost looked gray from the amount of sand in

it. He must have left his jacket behind on the

planet. Now that we were alone and the danger was

over, I could see he had let his guard down. He

wasn't wearing his usual "happy-go-lucky" smile. His

face was serious, and his eyes were as dark as a sea

before a storm.

I suddenly became self conscious, wondering what I

must look like. I looked down at my own uniform to

see that it was also smeared with blood, though not as

much as Starbuck's. My pants were covered in dirt,

and it would take me centaurs to get my boots to shine

again. I ran my fingers through my hair trying to

dislodge some of the tangles.

"You look beautiful." Starbuck said, completely

taking me off guard.

I laughed, "Yeah, dirt becomes us. I might style my

hair this way every day." I fluffed my hair and sand

bounced off the deck. We both laughed, but Starbuck's

eyes stayed serious. His eyes found mine, holding my

gaze.

"You said we should talk later. It's later." He said

from across the corridor. He stepped over beside me

and leaned against the wall.

"Yeah, it's later. But is now the right time? Or the

right place?" I tried to brush some of the dirt off

my shirt. I realized I probably smelled rank too.

"With our luck? Well I can't get us to that romantic

time and place unless we talk. I'd say now is the

perfect time."

"You have a good point." I chuckled remembering that

this was Starbuck's second trip to the Life Center in

only a few cycles.

"Look, I'm kind of new at this. Dating two girls I

mean, well, maybe not new at that. There was Noday,

and Aurora, and Athena and."

I interrupted him. "Starbuck, I don't need the list.

I think every warrior can recite it along with the

preflight check. Besides, it's that list that made

Aliana and I think we could, well, try this."

"Okay, so it's not anything new for me to date two

women." He hesitated for a moment. "But so, openly.

That's new. I'm used to sneaking around behind their

backs. It's kind of different for me that you two

seem, well, okay with it. So pardon me if I seem a

little out of my element."

"Sneaking around can be fun too." I flashed him an

evil grin that made Starbuck choke a little.

"Yeah it can be fun." He smiled wistfully. "Oh yeah,

this is going to be fun. Different, but fun." He

went serious again. "I just want to make sure that

you are both okay with it."

"I was right about you. You would never intentionally

hurt a woman."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. There have been a few times

that I knew exactly what I was doing. I can be a real

jerk sometimes."

"As long as we're all truthful, well, I think it could

work." I reached over and took his hand without

looking at him. "It'll be fun."

We stood there like that for a few centons, just

holding hands lost in our own thoughts. I know I

should have been worried about the rules and

regulations. Technically Starbuck couldn't date

either of us, but the rules had been ignored for

several other individuals that it didn't seem to be a

big concern. I was worried about Alianna, her health

anyway. But right at that moment it was my only

concern. I felt like the future had suddenly turned

bright and hopeful. It was like a sunrise after a

storm, when the air smells fresh and clean.

"I think I need to get to know you two, alone I mean.

It seems that you two know each other pretty well, and

I think that I should get to know each of you. You

are two very different people." Starbuck said

breaking our silence.

"You could say that again. So Starbuck, want to go

out on a date?" I looked at him waiting for an

answer.

"You're supposed to let me ask. Let's not go breaking

all the rules in one day, okay?" He laughed.

"Okay, okay.but you'd better ask Aliana out first. I

think she's going to need a good night on the town

after what she's been through!

"Okay, so let me handle that okay?" He teased me.

"Then the next night, you and me, and we'll just take

it from there." He squeezed my hand.

"Sounds like a fair deal to me." I smiled.

We stood that way for a few more moments, both of us

smiling and holding hands. We must have looked pretty

odd. When Lt. Boomer came around the corner of the

corridor looking for Starbuck, he slid to a halt

before continuing on his normal pace. I expected

Starbuck to immediately drop my hand when the warrior

approached him, but he didn't.

"Uh, Apollo wants to see you on the bridge." Lt.

Boomer said to Starbuck. "They got those scans in on

the planet and downloaded the information from your

Viper. It seems you guys were right. You did hear

voices."

"So we weren't going crazy!" I blurted out, then

realized I was talking to one of my instructors. "Uh

Sir." I added belatedly.

"No Cadet, you weren't going crazy. It seems to be an

old early warning system. Something you triggered

when you penetrated the shielding on the planet."

"So that's what knocked out their engines." Starbuck

said. "So, when I blew up the shielding--"

"It triggered the warnings." Lt. Boomer finished.

"Only there was no one to warn. Looks like the

population has been dead for several hundred yahrens.

Not sure why yet, but we're looking into it."

"Does it look like part of the thirteenth tribe?"

Starbuck asked giving my hand a squeeze.

"Hard to say at this point. We might make another

expedition to the planet, since it also had some

resources we could use. Plus we want to pick up the

other viper. Seems you guys landed one of the new

ones. Bent it up pretty good." Lt. Boomer said to

me.

"Uh, sorry about that sir." I said embarrassed.

He chuckled. "It's the risk you take when you fly

with Starbuck. He's not exactly known for bringing

them back in one piece." Lt. Boomer cast Starbuck a

disapproving look. "Uh buddy, you might want to clean

up before you head up to the bridge. Can you for once

land on a planet AND keep your uniform clean? You're

lucky they don't charge you for those shirts. You'd

be too broke to gamble."

"Hey I can't help it that they keep sending me on

these dangerous missions. It's just a part of the

job." Starbuck finally dropped my hand. "Reyana, you

tell them to get me as soon as Aliana wakes up, okay?"

"Okay." Was all I said, very conscious of Lt.

Boomer's presence.

They continued to banter as they walked down the

corridor, and I could tell that they were pretty good

friends.

"So rolling around in the dirt is mandatory for each

of your missions?" Lt. Boomer asked sarcastically.

"You ought to give it a try Boomer. I can't help it

if my viper likes landing in mud bogs."

I continued to wait for word on Aliana, alone with my

thoughts. I was sure that we could handle, no restate

that, love working out the details of both of us

dating Starbuck. But I suddenly had my doubts about

how everyone else would handle it. Starbuck was known

for his large circle of friends. They were older than

Aliana and me, and outranked us. It was a bit

intimidating. I knew if we were going to make this a

long term arrangement, that eventually we'd have to

work things out with his friends. I wasn't sure how

to do that. I knew it was important though. So I

while I waited, I tried to think up a plan.

A centaur later when the Med Tech came to tell me that

Aliana was out of surgery and I could see her, I still

hadn't come up with any good ideas.

As I approached the pod, Aliana looked so different

all swathed in white bandages. It stunned me to

realize just how injured she had been. The whole

ordeal caught up to me, and I couldn't move. Until I

noticed that Aliana was waking up. She started to

thrash and panic. I saw from the corner of my eye

Cassiopea heading towards her, but I beat the med

techthere.

"Shhhh.it's okay. It's okay. You're on the

Galactica."

Aliana's eyes cleared and she breathed a deep sigh.

She winced and I panicked.

"Does it still hurt? I'll tell them to give you more

meds."

"No." She whispered hoarsely. "I'm okay. Just hurt

for a milicenton."

"Are you okay? You sure?" I asked, still frightened

by the whole ordeal.

"Yeah. I'm okay. I don't remember getting here."

"You were pretty out of it by the time we got here. I

think they had you on some powerful stuff. But

everything's fine now. You're back on the Galactica

and all patched up. See, wasn't that fun?" I tried

to crack a joke to make her feel better.

"Yeah, lots of fun. You look awful."

"Gee, thanks. I kind of thought this look became me?"

"Where's Starbuck?" She asked and I took her hand in

mine and gave her a knowing smile.

"Duty called him away. Something about the scans from

the planet. They're getting him down here now." We

were both silent for a moment, then I whispered for

only her to hear. "We talked."

"Yeah?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"So are you going to tell me what he said?" She asked

perturbed.

"No. I don't think I am." I said thoughtfully.

"Why not?" She sounded almost angry.

"Because he wants to talk to you first. Don't worry

though, it's all okay. In fact," I lowered my voice

to insure we were not overheard by the hovering med

tech. "It's wonderful!"

Aliana smiled, and at that moment Starbuck walked into

the Life Center. He glowed, fresh from the turbo

wash, with a clean uniform and shining hair. His face

was lit up with smile. He radiated confidence and I

couldn't help smiling as I was caught up in his mood.

"Aliana, you look great! Wow, they did a good job on

you! Look how wonderful you are!" He took her hand

in his, then reached across and took mine. "See,

didn't I tell you everything was going to be fine!"

All we could do was smile. It is so easy to fall

under his charm. Starbuck turned his attention to me

for a moment. "Everything's alright now. I've got it

all taken care of. Why don't you go get cleaned up

and get some rest."

It didn't take me long to agree. All was right with

the world, how could it not be with Starbuck in

charge? Of course, I had to make sure Aliana was

going to be okay, so I approached Cassiopea and asked

her about Aliana's condition.

"She'll be fine. All the damage was repaired, and she

should stay in the Life Center for just a few cycles

until her lung heals sufficiently. Just to make sure

there are no complications. Feel free to visit her

anytime."

I thanked her and started to leave when she said,

"This isn't the first time I've seen you two with

Starbuck is it? Something about a head injury and

tylium leaks on the Rising Star?"

I couldn't tell from her tone what she was getting at.

But it didn't sound like a friendly inquiry either.

"Yes, that's right." I said coolly. "And it won't be

the last time you see us with him."

She laughed sarcastically as she turned away from me.

I knew I needed a turbo wash. I suddenly felt very

dirty.
****************************** PART 9

"Look, I just want to be 100% *sure* that you are okay with this." Starbuck stared at me with an uncharacteristically serious expression, his lips pursed, his eyes searching mine.

We were standing just outside the portal that led to the compartment for the main thrusters - why, I wasn't yet sure. But the lieutenant had promised me a "special evening." He had also made the same commitment to Reyana, openly, with our encouragement and continued assurances that we *wanted* things to be this way.

After two sectons, I was finally feeling back to normal. The bones had been easy to fuse, but the lung had been pesky and had been a little more reluctant to heal. I had spent over three days in the Lifestation, and Reyana and Starbuck had come by as often as they could to see me. After being released, I had had plenty of time to ponder things, since I was not permitted to continue with my training until the second secton - and then only with daily trips to the Lifestation to monitor the progress of the lung. But today, finally, I had been declared "fit to return to full active duty." In honor of this occasion, Starbuck and I had agreed that this was the evening when we would have our first date - just the two of us. The three of us had talked over the two sectons how we wanted to "take things slowly," but the unspoken sentiment that seemed to vibrate through the air was that this was it - the true test of our resolve to be open and willing to share.

And now, as daring and free-spirited as he claimed to be - as he viewed himself, I'm sure - I could tell that he was truly uncertain about this, that deep down, I suspected, he was as traditional in his values as I had thought I was. Sure, he had dated half the women in the Fleet, according to the rumors, but I also suspected, based on those rumors and gossip the other women cadets had been spreading, that he had, for a while, only been seeing the med tech, Cassiopeia. I suspected that he was actually quite monogamous at heart. But I had thought that I was, too.

However, surviving the destruction of your homeworld can change one's perspective. Big time. As I gazed up into his fluid blue eyes, so deep and revealing, as I read his hesitancy, his fear, even, that this was wrong, I felt the conviction that this was, under our present conditions, the right thing to do. Or if not "right," at least acceptable. Or maybe even necessary. No one had released any of the statistics to the people of the Fleet, but all one had to do was look around at the ranks of the Colonial warriors to know . . . our numbers were unbalanced.

Reyana and I had discussed this, as well. And we had surprised ourselves greatly by mutually agreeing that, one, neither one of us wanted to even consider a "permanent" relationship with someone at this time. No. We both had lost everything and everyone - everyone in our families. We were the only family we each had now. And with our future so vastly uncertain, we had both vowed that we would live each day to its fullest, enjoy each moment that we could, but make no definitive plans. We wanted to be warriors. We wanted to stop being victims and have a direct hand in trying to create a future for the human race. And with being a warrior came the doubled risk that our future could end in a flash - at the hand of enemy fire or even through the inherent risks of flying vipers and exploring the unknown space in front of the Fleet. But we would not just be sitting around on our astrums mourning the past.

But, second, second . . . we had agreed that if the Fates had introduced us to a man, whom we both found incredibly irresistible, and who seemed genuinely interested in both of us, well . . . then who were we to disagree with Them? I sensed - when I let myself look at our true condition of around 300,000 people crammed aboard 220 ships - I sensed that our survival would depend on many, many more people realizing that we could not *afford* to commit to monogamous relationships until . . . until our future was much more certain and our numbers were much greater and more balanced.

Lords, which raised one final question that I had been avoiding. What if . . .? It wasn't as if birth control were even readily available in the Fleet. Although, a population explosion under our current restrictive situation might be just as disastrous as too high of a death rate . . . argh! It was a precarious balance that we needed - and no one had bothered to address, yet. I wondered when . . .?

But at that moment, as I gazed into those blue eyes, I was ready to let the Fates decide what they would. And I had but one reservation: that Lieutenant Starbuck, whose reputation was known throughout the ranks -- a woman-chaser with a list of "conquests" as long as his arm (Miri, Noday - we all could cite it!), a charmer, a con man, a free spirit, a gambler - that *he* would regret proceeding with this. Reyana and I had seen the tension between him and Cassiopeia, had overheard their argument, and there had been several more, I sensed, since that one. Was he really ready to let go of that relationship? Or was he responding in anger to her reaction? Where did he really stand in all of this? We knew what he *said,* but did he even know what he truly felt? I sensed, just sensed, that his reputation was mostly a cover, a gambler's bluff, to hide the real way he felt. I also sensed that he had always done his best to avoid figuring out what those feelings might be.

So I took a deep breath. "Starbuck," I said quietly, locking my gaze with his, so that he could read how earnest I was. "I want this. Reyana wants this. But only if *you* are totally, completely comfortable with it. I promise you, promise you, that . . . that the only way I'll survive this horrible mess - without giving up or going insane -- is if I live each and every day, each moment, to the fullest - and let the Fates bring what they may!" I wanted to reach out, to touch him, to let my desire keep him from pulling away. . . but I kept my hands resolutely at my sides, because I also wanted this to be *his* choice, with no undue persuasion. In fact, I stepped back, broke the gaze, and leaned against the wall as I said, "Do you really want to do this? What about Cassiopeia?"

For a moment, there was silence, broken only by the low drone of the thrusters reverberating through the walls. Starbuck walked a few paces in the opposite direction, away from me. My heart was pounding. I held each breath a beat as I waited, tense, expecting the worst. When he turned to face me again, after several agonizing centons, I was prepared, I told myself, for him to back down. I fully expected it as he walked slowly back towards me. His face was so serious, his jaw set. Thus, he caught me completely by surprise when, without hesitation and in one fluid motion, he took me by the shoulders, pulled me close, sliding his hands to each side of my face and bringing my chin up so that my lips melted into his kiss - a long, passionate, heart-felt kiss as I wrapped my arms around him, embracing him tightly.

"Wow," was all I could manage when he finally pulled back.

As I tried to regain my composure, I watched Starbuck open a compartment located next to the door that led to the main thrusters. He removed two pairs of ear protectors and handed one to me. "Put these on," he said with a sly smile.

I gave him a dubious look. "More engine repairs? Is that your idea of a 'special time'?"

"You'll see. Just follow me." He winked and yanked open the door. The roar of the thrusters was loud, even through the ear protectors. He grasped my hand and led me into the chamber, past the huge, pulsing engines, and over to a ladder near the rear. He pointed up and began climbing the rungs. I had no idea where we were headed, but I followed. Starbuck had hoisted open the hatch above us and disappeared through it. As I reached the top, he extended his hand to help me up and through.

As I pulled myself into the chamber, Starbuck closed the hatch, and all was silent suddenly. Removing the ear protectors, I gazed around, still not sure where we were. "What is this place?" I asked, puzzled.

"It's a celestial chamber." He explained how it had been used by navigators hundreds of yahrens ago to verify the old star charts. He also described how Captain Apollo, after discovering the dome, had repaired the ancient equipment and now used it as a place to which he could escape. It was probably the only place in the Fleet that offered complete solitude. Or privacy. "Look," he finally said and pressed a switch on the rotating command chair.

The dome opened slowly, letting the velvety black of space spill in and the brilliant stars surround us. It was breathtaking, the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. "Oh, wow," I said again.

Starbuck was grinning, pleased by my reaction. He moved in close and wrapped me in his arms, hugging me against his chest. "I thought you might like it . . ." Placing a hand against my cheek, he kissed me, tenderly, softly, at first. He slid the hand around my back again, caressing, drawing me closer. The kiss became more eager, more passionate.

"Wait!" A sudden, horrible thought had struck me. I pushed back from him with both hands.

Starbuck looked distressed. "What? What is it?"

"You said that Captain Apollo comes here?" I said, feeling an acute panic attack. "What if he -"

"Don't worry!" Starbuck grinned, chuckling. "He knows we're here -"

"He what?!" I pulled free of the lieutenant's hold, feeling my heart racing. I felt anxious and angry, even, because Starbuck was still laughing at me. "What do you *mean* 'he knows'?" I was nearly shouting.

Starbuck shook his head. "No. Everything's fine. Come here." He pointed to the chair on the swiveling control center in the middle of the celestial chamber. Taking my elbow as I continued to frown at him, he guided me over and helped me up.

I was still staring at him, trying to calm my nerves. "Won't you get in trouble for this?" I asked, finally. I was remembering the stern, disapproving looks the captain had given him after finding the three of us wrapped in the blankets on that planet.

Starbuck leaned on the panel, putting his hand on my knee. "No," he said quietly. "I guess I'd better explain some things."

"That might help." I felt calmer but rather confused.

"Okay," he said. "I had a, uh, meeting with Apollo and the commander the day after your crash landing. Well, you need to understand that it wasn't really an official reprimand or anything like that." Pacing back and forth now, he went on to explain that he and the captain were close friends - family really. And the same applied to the commander. He said all this as he stared everywhere but at me, so I knew that this sort of frank discussion was not easy for him. He finally looked at me. "Anyway, we had a rather lengthy conversation about, well, us. The three of us."

I gulpled. He was discussing "us" with the commander of the Fleet.

He continued. "And it's true. Apollo was madder than hades with me, at first. His exact words were, 'I never thought you'd stoop this low, playing two cadets off one another.' So I explained -again - that we, the three of us, had decided it was what we wanted."

"You said all of this in front of the commander?" I asked.

"Well, yeah. And he's the one who eventually backed me up."

"You're joking, right?" I was frowning at him again.

"Nope." He was grinning. "First, I reminded Apollo that he had not only dated a cadet but was *sealed* to one -"

"He was?"

Starbuck suddenly stopped and looked away. "Uh, that's another story that I'd rather not go into right now." He returned his gaze to me and continued, "But the point was that we can't possibly adhere to all of the old regulations, given our refugee status. And Apollo had to concede that point."

"But two cadets?" I said. "I don't suppose he understood this."

"Ah, no," he admitted. "Captain Apollo is quite traditional when it comes to matters of romance and such." He gave me a wry smile. "Actually, this is where I gained the commander's support."

"How?" I was incredulous.

"Well, I laid out the facts. The unavoidable truth that we've faced a drastic population reduction and could find ourselves completely obliterated tomorrow. Nothing's certain and nothing's the same. And I used the figures that you and Reyana used with me, about how we've got an imbalance of males versus females, about how - genetically - we might have to forgo traditional, monogamous relationships if we are to survive."

"And?"

"It turns out that the commander - as I should have known! - had already considered all of this. He's very much aware of our current situation, of course, and he's always thinking of the future. He simply hadn't brought any of this up because people, even a yahren later, are still recovering from the shock of the Holocaust. He didn't think they'd be receptive to something so radical. I mean, he'd have to bring it up with the Council of Twelve, first."

"Oh, Lords," I whispered, covering my mouth.

"They'd probably keel over with heart attacks right then and there. Talk about 'stanch and traditional'!"

"So . . . what happened?" I was feeling a growing relief, a glimmer of hope that what we had in mind might actually be . . . accepted - by some, at any rate.

"Apollo eventually conceded that I wasn't being a total louse or cretin and agreed to withhold any further judgment on my moral character - or lack thereof - for now. The commander words," Starbuck said with a wink, "were, 'Why am I not surprised that's it's *you* who's one of the first to be willing to give this sort of arrangement a try?'"

I had to laugh. I couldn't quite believe it, but I certainly didn't see him fabricating a tale like this. So we even had the commander's approval, more or less. It was beyond comprehension!

"Does that put your mind at ease?" Starbuck asked. He had moved in closer and was offering me a hand down from the seat.

I nodded as I took his hand and jumped down. There were no more barriers. No more excuses. We were not going to be reprimanded later or interrupted right now. We were alone, surrounded by a myriad of brilliant stars, just the two of us. So why was I so nervous all of a sudden? I was fidgeting. Maybe the fact this was actually the first time that I had ever felt this strongly or had been in this sort of situation with a man had something to do with it. After all, even up until we climbed the ladder into the celestial dome, everything seemed like a fantasy, a dream. But that fantasy had every chance of becoming reality now. I felt eager, excited, extremely nervous and totally terrified. And I did *not* want Starbuck to know that I had never done this before . . .

Starbuck, I hoped, figured I was just nervous considering all of the social mores were about to break, at least after he had his date with Reyana the next evening. He led me around to the other side of the rotating control console where he had arranged a picnic dinner, with a plate of proteins, carbos, and mushies and a bottle of ambrosa laid out on a blanket. Still, Starbuck knew I was uneasy. "Look," he said, "no pressure, okay? We'll only do what you feel comfortable doing. I promise." He smiled and popped the cork off the ambrosa. "Here's to setting new traditions," he said, taking a long swig from the bottle before handing it to me.

I took a careful sip. If I was going to relax, it would be without any alcoholic influences. I wanted this to be perfect, perfect. And it was. Or would be, if only I weren't so tense.

Starbuck offered me the plate and I took a protein cube. "I know you met Reyana," he said, "after the Great Destruction. I'm curious, though, about how you two became such close friends. You seem very different."

I have to admit that the lieutenant knows how to put a person at ease. As I told him our story, about how we'd found ourselves crammed in with about 300 other refugees on the freighter Virgus, about how we'd ended up, somehow, defending each other during a riot caused by food shortages, about how after that, we gradually became inseparable, I began to relax. I told him that we had had similar fates - losing *everyone* in our families, and that although we were opposites in many ways, we seemed to complement each other. Starbuck nodded and smiled at that. And I remembered how he and Captain Apollo - definitely two opposites! - were such close friends.

As we talked and ate the food and sipped at the ambrosa, I eventually let Starbuck move closer. He put his arm around me, and it felt so warm and so safe. With the stars shining all around us, it felt wonderful; I had not felt this happy since long before the Holocaust.

And then he told me his story, about how he had grown up in orphanages and on the streets of Caprica, eventually enlisting in the Colonial service before he ended up in too much trouble from all of the cons and gambling schemes he in which he had inevitably always gotten involved. He described how he had befriended the most unlikely of friends - the commander's son. He spoke so casually about what must have been a very difficult childhood; I realized just how strong and enduring his character was - just how, how good he was at heart. I admired him tremendously.

Finally, he pulled me close again, so close. He turned so that he could lean in and kiss my forehead, my ear, my cheek . . . my lips. I melted into his embrace, feeling the passion, the growing desire, the readiness to let the Fates take their course.

Lords, help me, but it was he who pulled back this time, holding my face gently with his hands and gazing into my eyes. "Are you sure?" he asked. "Are you sure about this? You have to be sure," he said softly. "Because I would very much like to . . ." His voice trailed off as he gazed at me, and a frown crept across his face.

Oh, no! I realized that I was blushing, blushing like a schoolgirl, like -

"Oh, frak," he whispered and sat back. "You've never - I mean, is this your first time to . . .?" He looked suddenly quite nervous. "Look, I'd just assumed that since, well, you both were so, so, uh, content to try this arrangement, I assumed that you both had, uh, experience in these matters." He was looking everywhere but straight at me and he was running his hand through his hair. "Maybe, since this is just our first time out, maybe we should just take things, you know, a bit more slowly. I don't want you to feel, to feel -"

"No!" I said and pulled him back to me. "I'm certain this is what I want. Positive. Look, I've had two long sectons to think about this, too." I put my hands behind his ears, caressing his neck. My face was centimetrons from his. "I've never been *more* certain about anything." I kissed him, fervently, so afraid that he would back down. I was breathing in long, slow, deep breaths as I embraced him tightly. For a moment, just a moment, he held back, but only for a moment. After a few microns, he let go of all reservations.

Slowly, tenderly, passionately, fantasy became reality.
******************************** Part 10

Aliana had gotten into the barracks late. She didn't say much about the date, just smiled at me from her

bunk before she rolled over and went to sleep. I didn't really ask much either. I guess I could have

been jealous, but instead I felt happy. It was nice to see a smile on Aliana's face, a true smile. She

had confided in me a long time ago that she had never, and at one time was actually waiting until she got

sealed. But something about almost dying on a barren rock made her change her mind about a lot of things.

It was like overnight she had turned into a "live for the moment" kind of gal.

We had simulator training that morning, to go over together as a squadron what had gone wrong on the

planet. They ran us through more simulations for planet side landings. Of course in a simulator I did

great. So how come it didn't work that way in reality? They finally had to kick me out of the

simulator for lunch. Lt. Boomer was nice about it though, telling me that it didn't matter how many

simulations I ran, you just couldn't always predict what would happen.

I only agreed to go to lunch because I wanted to talk with Aliana. I wanted to hear all the details that

had her floating through the day. She even completely ignored all the nasty comments that Nikki and Shyra tried to send her way. They rolled off Aliana's back like water. Starbuck had tactfully kept his distance from both Aliana and me. But the lack of contact was almost more noticeable than if he had paid us extra attention. Every time he came to help or comment on Aliana's progress, he smiled, but not his usual for public smile. It was something else, something I'd never seen before.

We got our trays of food and sat off by ourselves. I expected her to start gushing about what a good time

she had, but instead she said something that completely unnerved me.

"The Commander knows about us!" She whispered.

"WHAT!" I almost yelled it I was so shocked. She motioned for me to lower my voice. "What do you mean the Commander knows? What about us? You and me, or, or.*us*."

"Starbuck, you and me!" She hissed.

I admit, I wanted to die. Just to slide underneath the table and melt into the deck plates. Aliana rushed on, oblivious to the fact that I was completely embarrassed.

"But it's okay. The Commander's not against it. In fact, he said he was trying to find some way to bring

the subject up with the Council of Twelve and the general public."

"The subject being *us*?" I said shocked.

"No, well, not exactly. It seems he's not so old he can't see the same things we see. I mean, men are

pretty scarce around here unless you are on the Galactica. I mean, you said straight out it's one of

the reasons you wanted to become a Warrior. Increase your dating potential is how I think you put it. The

Commander has noticed that there aren't many men left in the fleet and death rates are higher than birth

rates and that needs to be changed. Starbuck had a conversation with the Commander and Captain Apollo,

and."

"Captain Apollo knows too? Wait a minute, what did you just say about the Council of Twelve?" I asked

numb with shock.

Aliana continued to fill me in and I got the general concept that we had somehow received the Commander's approval to proceed with our new arrangement, although quietly. But in the pit of my stomach I felt sick. The reality of all this was almost too much. We had become too public too quick. Fun and games are one thing, but this was serious stuff now if the Commander was involved. I guess I always knew that we were skirting the rules and regs, but I never thought about the reality of it. I had just been working all this out in my own little simulation, and as I had recently

learned, simulations can often be radically different from the real thing.

Aliana prattled on about what a wonderful evening it had been, and something about a celestial chamber, but I wasn't really paying attention. I was happy for her, but my mind was running fast to figure out how we were going to deal with the public aspects of all this. We had already taken a lot of ribbing from our

fellow cadets, and plenty of veiled insults. I wasn't sure if I could take any more.

Aliana caught that I was only half listening. "I freaked you out with the Commander thing, didn't

I?"

"Uh yeah!" I answered sarcastically.

"You know, that's just like you. I talked until I was blue in the face about how we could get Starbuck in

trouble and you just kept telling me 'No worries. No problems.' And now that I'm telling you that it's

all worked out and fine, you start to worry!"

She would have lectured at me longer, but it was time to go back to class. I was so looking forward to

running more simulations. I felt like trying extra hard to crash, you know, to see how smashed up the

simulator would let me get. Starbuck caught up to me while I was waiting my turn over in the corner by

myself.

"I'll meet you after class in the landing bay. I can't wait, it will be fun!"

I don't remember what I said to him. I had actually forgotten that we had a date, and wasn't even sure I

could go through with it. But I knew if I didn't go, I'd get an even longer lecture from Aliana. So she

had me pegged. I guess my style is more suited to sneaking around.

I made it through class. I have to admit Lt. Boomer gave me an odd look when I thrust my simulated engines and plowed my simulated viper into the simulated planet. He asked me if I had gotten it out of my

system and would I like to try it again. I said no, but he started the simulator up again anyway, and

according to the readings I performed a perfect landing. Yeah, what does a machine know anyway? Lt.

Boomer did say that maybe I was done in the simulator for a while.

Aliana lectured me all the way back to the barracks. "What was that all about? You know better than that!"

"I know, I just wanted to have some fun with it. Besides, it's not like it's real." I replied

flippantly.

"It's how we learn to do the real thing. Without simulators we would be out there with no experience.

If we didn't have the experience we may have crashed on that planet."

"Uh, Aliana, we did crash! The hangar crew keeps giving me dirty looks for messing up a new viper. I

bet I get the scummiest one next time!"

"Yes, but we could have crashed and died instantly. It was our training that got us through the ordeal."

Aliana continued on, but I wasn't listening. She wasright, I know. I just wasn't in the mood. I had

other things on my mind.

She didn't stop until she was interrupted by one of the other cadets coming up to tell us that Lt.

Starbuck wanted to see me.

"Oh yeah, we have a date." I said. Aliana gave me a strange look, but I didn't give her a chance to ask me

what was wrong. I headed straight for the corridor outside the cadet quarters.

"Hey Starbuck." I said, trying to sound cheerful.

"Hey Reyana, about tonight. I'm really sorry, but I have to cancel. They changed the duty roster and I've

got a picket patrol and I promise I'll make it up to you." He was talking fast and had a pleading look on

his face.

I had never seen Starbuck this way. He looked really worried actually. That kind of threw me. I had yet

to see him worried, not like this. We had been through a cylon attack, tylium leaks, a freezing cold

night on an alien talking planet, but this worried look was new. He nearly danced from foot to foot.

"The duty roster is posted if you don't believe me. I am really sorry about this. I know it's not fair, I

mean, Aliana and I, and the deal was for you and I. But I couldn't get anybody to switch with me."

I stopped Starbuck before he could say anymore. I hated to see him like this, like he was being tortured

or something. "Hey, it's alright. I believe you! Duty comes first, it's okay."

Starbuck looked at the deck, quickly up at me, then back to the deck again. "I am sorry. I tried to

switch with Bojay, but he said he didn't want to do a double, and I can't track down Jolly."

"Starbuck, it's okay! I understand! Would you look at me?" Starbuck slowly looked up from the floor and

with a sheepish look on his face. "I know duty comes first. You know Starbuck, I had this instructor once,

and on the first day of class he said, 'Duty comes first. Everything else, friends, family, lovers, all

come last. The Service is your family, your viper is your lover and I'm your best friend.' Do you

remember that, because I do."

"Man I hate it when my own words come back to bite me!" He said smiling. Then he flashed me the

apologetic face again. "I really am sorry."

"Would you stop that? I mean, I like you Starbuck, but I love to fly too. I would skip a date with you

to fly anytime." I said reaching out to rub his arm to make him feel better.

"Not the date I have planned." He flashed me a coy grin.

"Well, maybe I would. Depends on what you had planned." I teased back. "I can't think of a single

romantic spot on this big barge."

"Oh I can find one or two. But I was thinking maybe we'd play some cards first."

"Are you trying to win back your cubits? Because I already spent them on the dress I'm going to wear." I

grinned at him.

"Maybe I'll have to play you for that dress." Starbuck gave me one of his famous smiles.

"I bet it would look good on you. Don't you have a patrol or something?" I teased.

"Oh yeah, I gotta go. I really am sorry."

He gave me the sheepish look again and I just wanted to smack him!

"Stop that and get out of here!" I said, but was laughing so he'd know I wasn't serious.

"Okay." He started to walk away, then turned around smiling again, "But you said you liked me."

"I will never admit that unless you come through on that date." I threatened.

"Oh, I'll come through. You said you liked me, you said you liked me." He continued in a sing song voice

as he walked down the corridor.

I shook my head in mock disgust. I had to admit I was relieved to not be going on a date with Starbuck

tonight. I needed to think. But after seeing him, and joking with him, I was kind of disappointed.

It took three more cycles before we had the chance to get together again. Between his schedule and mine it

just didn't seem to happen, and that was fine. Except for Aliana constantly worrying about it. I teased her

at one point that she just wanted us to go out so she could have him again. She vehemently denied it, and I

felt relieved that that wasn't the real reason. I knew her better than that, but she was on me

constantly to clear up my schedule and get my studying done. I was starting to wonder what her motive was. But she finally confessed to me that she was worried I would back out of the whole thing, and she wasn't sure if she could do this without me. That took me a little by surprise, but I had to admit, I probably

couldn't have gone through with a date alone with Starbuck without her backing me up.

Starbuck kept apologizing to me every chance he got, and then getting this really odd relieved look every

time I yelled at him to stop it. I guess he's not used to women who understand that duty comes first.

We finally were able to meet up one day after class. I rushed back to the barracks to change and met him at

the landing bay just like he said. He had teased me so often about what a nice date he had planned that I

was finally excited about the date instead of dreading it.

Starbuck was there waiting for me in his dress uniform. He openly gaped at me when he saw the dress

I was wearing. It wasn't as revealing as the one from our night on the Rising Star, but it was a nice one.

"Wow, I would have worn something nicer too, but someone stole all my cubits." Starbuck said taking my

arm in his.

"And you're not getting them back." I said batting my eyes at him.

"At least the money was well spent. Well, why don't we go steal someone else's money? The shuttle for the Rising Star is leaving soon." He escorted me to the shuttle and we entered the packed shuttle arm in arm.

I think all of blue squadron was there, as well as many of the cadets. So much for sneaking around, I

thought to myself. I suddenly became very conscious of the whole situation, but Starbuck firmly kept my

arm in his and found us seats. He held my hand once we were seated. He didn't seem to notice how quiet

and nervous I was as he kept going on about the system Aliana and I had used on him and how he thought he had worked out the flaws. I was starting to relax and sink into the reality of actually being on a date with Starbuck. It was kind of exciting! He did look so handsome in his dress uniform. He looks good in a

cape. The gold trim went well with his hair and made his blue eyes stand out. It was nice to talk to

someone about something other than flying and war.

We were deep in a heated discussion of the pros and cons on one of the three systems Aliana and I had

tried on him that fateful night on the Rising Star, when Shyra and Nikki came up to us.

"So Starbuck, out tonight with one from your harem?" Shyra said with an insipid smile on her face.

I flushed with embarrassment and felt my blood start to boil.

Starbuck didn't even flinch or look in their direction. "Just ignore them." He muttered to me.

Neither of them had taken the hint, and still stood in front of us. I turned and glared at them.

"What Reyana, can't cut it as a pilot, so sleeping your way to a good grade?" Nikki added.

I was up like a shot and reached out and shoved Nikki. I know it wasn't a wise move, there I was in heels,

and she was still in uniform. Those boots do stick to the deck well. I guess it was a good thing she didn't

budge or it would have really drawn attention to us.

"Tsk tsk tsk," Shyra said to me. "You wouldn't want us to ruin that dress before you had your chance to

earn a better grade."

I wanted to pulverize her! Starbuck stood up and grabbed my arm as I pulled back for the first punch.

Thank the lords he has a strong grip, because I swear I tried to break free.

"Reyana, relax." He whispered, his lips brushing my ear. He pulled me back towards him wrapping his arms around me. "Okay girls, you've had your fun. Now move on." Starbuck almost sounded friendly.

Nikki and Shyra smiled at him like maneaters. "Starbuck, you just let us know anytime your ready for

a real woman."

"Is there a problem here?" Said the security guard, who must have noticed me trying to shove Nikki.

"No Reese, not a problem." Starbuck said annoyed. "Just having a little chat with my cadets, right

Ladies?"

"Oh right. Have a fun evening Reyana." Nikki said sweetly.

"Anytime Starbuck, anytime." Shyra said just as sweet, but it sounded sour to my ears.

"See Reese, no need for your protection." Starbuck said. Starbuck waited until the security guard

ambled off before he relaxed his grip on me. He still held me, but not as tight. I stood there for a few

centons just taking deep breaths and trying to calm down. "Relax." He whispered again, brushing my ear

with his lips in a kiss. In my angry state, it sent a shiver down my spine.

"Stop that." I pulled away from him, and he tightened his grip.

"Not until you calm down."

"People are staring."

"So calm down and have a seat."

I sighed and relaxed, and Starbuck released his grip and guided me to my seat. We sat there for a while as

I tried to calm down. Starbuck started to chuckle, then to laugh. I tried to ignore him, but it was

getting to me.

"What?" I snapped.

"Oh, you have a temper!" Starbuck teased me, as he reached over to tickle me.

"And you find that funny?" I was still angry and annoyed.

"Yeah, I do." He laughed at his own private joke. "I like learning new things about you."

"Oh yeah, well I'm going to teach you a few new things tonight." I turned and smiled at him, running my

finger down the line of his jaw, down his neck, tracing my way to the middle of his chest. Then I

poked him. "At the card table. Your cubits are mine!"

He laughed. "Oh you think so?"

"Yes, I do." I replied

"Well maybe I'll let you win again. It worked out in my favor last time."

"Oh you think so?"

Starbuck reached up to my shoulder and ran his finger down the line of my dress, following the neckline

around and down to where it plunged. "I'll be collecting my winnings later. Nice fabric by the

way."

Starbuck's gaze was so hot I melted. I lost myself in his deep blue eyes. They twinkled as he started to

smile.

I smiled back. "I'm sure it will look good on you."

"As long as it's off you." He sat back and pulled a fumarello out of his sleeve. "Now I'm thinking

between me and you we should be able to take at least every other hand, so if we spread our cubits out just

right, we should make a killing." The air was filled with the sweet smoke as he detailed our plans for the

evening.

Starbuck was right. We had the flaws worked out and had a wonderful time beating dealer after dealer. The waitresses kept bringing us free drinks to try to slow us down. But we were invincible. They finally shut the table down on us, claiming that we were too drunk and they couldn't serve us anymore. We had been talking about leaving for about a centaur anyway, but Starbuck wanted to see if they really would shut the table on us. He said then we'd know we had really beat them. We didn't win all that much, but it was

more cubits than I had seen since the destruction.

Most of them went to securing a private room. Starbuck was very coy about it, telling the host that

since they had shut the tables on us because we were too drunk then they had an obligation to provide us a

place to sleep it off. Somehow I think that gray haired gentlemen knew we weren't going to be doing

much sleeping.

The room was nice, and I was pleasantly warmed by all the ambrosia I had consumed. I walked over to the viewport and gazed at the stars as Starbuck finished paying the host. I was lost in the stars when

Starbuck came up behind me wrapping his arms around me and nuzzled into my neck.

"Mmmmm, this is nice. Thanks, I needed this."

"My pleasure." He answered and started kissing my neck. I swear I purred.

Then suddenly he pulled back, and spun me around. He tried to sober up for a moment and gave me a serious look. "Okay, I have to ask."

But then he didn't say anything. Just stood there looking serious.

"What?" I finally asked. "Am I sure? I'm totally sure about this. I thought we already covered this?"

I said reaching to pull him close.

"No, not that." He said backing away. "I have to ask." But then he didn't say anything more.

"Ask what? I'm confused."

Starbuck reached up and ran his fingers through his hair. "I have to ask, um, well."

"Well what?" He reached to run his fingers through his hair again and I grabbed his hand. "What?"

He looked everywhere but at me. "This isn't your." He hesitated.

"My what? You know, you shouldn't drink. It makes you loopy."

"I'm not drunk! Look, this isn't your first is it?"

He looked so uncomfortable as he said it. I couldn't help myself and burst out laughing. Now it was his

turn to be confused.

"What?"

I just kept laughing and started to pull him close.

"No, you answer me first." Starbuck said trying to pull away from me. I reached out and grabbed the edge

of his cape pulling him in.

"It's not funny!" He protested. I reached out and tickled him. Starbuck tensed, grabbed my hands, and

got right up in my face. "I'm serious, I need to know!"

He scared me a little so it took me a moment to answer, but he didn't seem to have plans to let me go

until I did.

"No, it's not." I said softly. "But the last guy was a while ago, and it was pretty serious. So let's keep

this fun, okay?"

He practically melted as he relaxed. He slowly moved his hands from a grab to a gentle hold, and leaned in

for a very long passionate kiss. Somehow I wound up with my arms around him and my hands in his hair. His arms wrapped around me once again holding me tight. It felt like centaurs before we both pulled back.

Starbuck brushed my ear with his lips, sending a shiver through me as he said, "Let's have some fun."

Then he reached down and tickled me. It didn't take me long before I had him pinned on the bed, I am the

better tickler after all. And then we had some fun!

****

So I guess we did use the room to sleep it off, because I remember Starbuck waking me up to remind me

I had to get back to the Galactica before curfew. He started off nice and easy, with soft kisses and

ruffling my hair. He said something about how cute I looked sleeping, and I told him he'd better just let

me be cute. He finally had to order me to get up. That bed was so nice and soft, and I didn't want to

the night to end. But Starbuck was relentless, literally dragging me out of bed.

We made it just in time for the last shuttle back. It was nearly empty, so we sat in the back by ourselves.

He freely put his arm around me, and I laid my head on his shoulder trying to go back to sleep. Starbuck

caught me just as I was dozing off.

"So this guy, how long ago was it?

"About a yahren." I said sleepily.

Starbuck thought for moment, then asked, "So how serious was it?"

"There was a ring involved, if that's what you want to know."

"So what happened?" Starbuck asked. "The destruction?"

"Oh you know, usual story. He was a on a training mission for the Atlantia, just a peace envoy what

could happen. Oh no, look! There's a wall of Cylon fighters!" I answered sarcastically.

"That's not funny." Starbuck said angrily. "I lost a lot of good friends that way."

"Sorry." I said "No it's not funny."

We sat there in silence for a while before he asked, "So how did you get out of the colonies?"

I took my head from his shoulder and looked up at him. "You know, you are the first warrior to ask that.

Most don't want to know about how we had to scramble to the ports. I swear, I walked over people to make

it on that broken down freighter. That's where I lost the ring. I bought my way on."

"That's not right!" Starbuck said.

"I guess that's why you guys don't ask how we got here. Most of what went on then wasn't right."

Starbuck looked at me with sympathy, then drew my head back down to his shoulder. We sat in silence until he asked, "Is that where you met Aliana?"

"No. That freighter wasn't going to make it, so they transferred all of us to another one. That's where I

met Aliana."

"She said something about a food riot."

"Oh yeah, now that was fun. We ran out of food, and...and people started dieing. Then suddenly we had

protein cubes. Rumors started going around that the Galactica was turning people into food."

"That's not what happened at all! We found people who were hoarding food, like Sire Uri. We would never do that!" Starbuck said outraged.

"Well, you've got to admit, it looked kind of bad. No food, people die, now there's food. You have to

admit, it didn't look good."

"You don't honestly believe that the Galactica canablized people?" Starbuck pulled away and stared

at me in horror.

"No. In fact, I didn't care. It was food, and I wanted to survive. I didn't care where it came from

at that moment. And, that's when Aliana and I met and we swore that would never happen to us again."

Starbuck's look of horror softened back to sympathy. "So you joined the service. As mechanics at first,

right? Three square meals, right?"

"Right. Only it was fun too. But when they opened up the program for female pilots we didn't hesitate to

switch over. I love flying!"

"Really? Hmmm. What do you like best?" Starbuck had a thoughtful look on his face.

"Launching. The steel walls zipping by, and then," I closed my eyes imagining it perfectly, "then openness. Nothing but the stars ahead. What about you?"

"Hmmm.I like feel of the engines, knowing I'm in control of all that power." Starbuck said, sounding

sectors away.

"Oh yeah, that's nice too."

We spent the rest of the shuttle ride talking about the thrill of speed and the expanse of space. We

docked on the Galactica way too soon. I knew I would be feeling the effects of this night for a long time to come.