Disclaimer

I am a poor starving artist with no intentions of making money off of this. I own absolutely none of the characters herein, and have created this sheerly for my own enjoyment and the enjoyment of anyone who reads it. Please don't sue me.

This Side Down

Part Two

No Need for School

Akane needed to run.

Early on in life, she had discovered that physical action, anything that stressed her body beyond what it was capable of, helped calm her and keep her temper under control. Breaking bricks helped a lot, but even a nice long run kept her from boiling over as quickly. And right now, she desperately needed the self-control.

Damn stupid father, engaging me before I was even born!

At least Tenchi wasn't such a bad fellow. While he was somewhat rude at times, he was trying his best to cope with this foolishness of a planned engagement. Of course, that didn't mean he'd managed to get them out of it, but...

She realized that she had come to the end of her course, placing her back at the main gates of the Tendo compound. She was just turning in to the compound, when there was a frightful yell. She yelped and jumped back in surprise.

"What on earth are they doing?"

Tenchi and Genma were in the midst of a pitched battle. Genma was all over the air, sometimes under his own control. He was launching hand and foot strikes against Tenchi, often using the impact of an attack to springboard away. Rather, using the impact of the parries, as he did not seem to be landing any good shots.

Tenchi stood near the koi pond, bokuto in hand. While he had seemed off-balance and uncontrolled when unarmed, his skill with the sword was remarkable. Almost every shot that Genma threw was blocked, evaded, parried or dodged.

Finally, Tenchi swung the bokuto and knocked Genma into the pond. The older man - now a panda - surfaced and growled.

"Sorry, Pop. But breakfast is being served."

"School? Here in Nerima? But I'm enrolled at Juuban High!"

"Don't be foolish, Tenchi! You certainly can't commute all the way across Tokyo just to go to a different high school! Since we're in the Nerima ward, you have to attend a Nerima school."

Tenchi snorted in disgust. "Fine. Which one?"

"Since the two younger Tendo girls go to Furinkan High, you'll be going there with them. And before you ask, I called already and spoke with the vice principal. You're already enrolled."

Tenchi sighed, giving in to the inevitable. "Fine. What are you gonna do about the Juuban High enrollment?"

"They'll just have to live without you."

"Hmph. And what about books?"

Genma handed Tenchi a leather bookbag. "All textbooks already acquired, and a good supply of blank paper for notes."

Tenchi eyed the bookbag. "And how much did Nabiki charge you for this?"

"WHAT? I'll have you know that I parted with much hard-earned cash to get you this - and do you know how hard it was to find a store open at this hour that sells school supplies?"

Tenchi flipped the bag over to reveal the kana on the other side. "So why does it have Nabiki's name on it?"

Genma at least had the grace to look abashed. "I was hoping you'd overlook that."

"Well, Tenchi? Are you ready to go?" Nabiki strolled in, wearing a light blue dress - apparently the school uniform.

"Yeah, I guess. Where's Akane?"

"Here!" Akane ran down the stairs and out the door. "Let's go, or we're gonna be late!"

"Hey, Akane."

"Yes, Tenchi?" She had to look up at him; he was walking along the fence alongside the canal.

"Mind if we spend lunch together today?"

"Huh?"

"Look, my grandfather has given me no choice, okay? Apparently it's a matter of family honour that I marry a Tendo daughter. I'd rather make sure it's one I like. So I figure, I'm going to have to spend some time with all three of you."

Akane stopped and stared at him. "So you're not doing anything to fight this arranged marriage?"

He looked downcast. "There's actually very little I can do to fight it. If Katsuhito wishes it, I must follow his wishes."

"Why?"

Tenchi sighed. "Grandfather told me once that after Achika died, Pop was just gonna dump me and run. He left me at Grandfather's house and ran. If it weren't for the fact that he was hung over from drinking too much the night before, he might have gotten clean away. But Grandfather dragged him back, and berated him for trying to abandon me. Then Pop said he was gonna take me on the road, to train me in the ways of a true martial artist. Grandfather figured that Pop was gonna take me as far as the nearest slave trader. So he forced Genma to stay at his house. He also forced him to remarry. So you see, if it weren't for Grandfather, I might have grown up with no mother and no father."

Akane was silent for a time. Then, "So you figure you owe him?"

"It's far more than that. But that is part of it."

"I see." They walked in silence for a time.

"It's okay."

"Hm?"

"We can spend lunch together." She smiled at him. "I think I'd like that."

"Okay."

"Can you tell me something?"

"Sure."

"Why are you walking on the fence?"

Tenchi shrugged. "Balance training. Plus, I like having a better view of my surroundings."

Akane grinned. "Oh, I see. So you can see threats coming more easily?"

"Right."

"I don't think it's helping."

SPLASH

"Ack!"

Spreading water to keep the dust down was normal in most cities...but there was no reason for this lady to be throwing water that high...

Akane's grin widened. "Something wrong?"

Tenchi cursed. "I gotta go back. I can't show up for school this way."

"We don't have time. Nabiki, you go ahead. I'll take Tenchi to Tofu-sensei's office."

Tenchi stood outside the front door to the clinic. Akane had gone inside to get a kettle of hot water, but had told her - for some reason - to stay here.

Man, what's taking her so long? Hoo-boy, what a lousy way to start the--

A skeletal hand fell on her shoulder. She twisted around, and came face to face with a grinning skull.

"Gyaah!" In a twinkling, Tenchi ran up the fence and perched on one of its stone pillars.

"Oh, pardon me. I didn't mean to startle you."

The speaker was a tall, slender man, dressed in clothing similar to Tenchi's own, save that it was all black. In his hands was a skeleton.

"Nothing to worry about, my dear. This is just Betty. My skeleton."

"Uh-huh." Tenchi climbed down off the fence.

"Tenchi, here's the hot--Oh, good morning, Tofu-sensei!" Akane had returned, bearing a kettle.

"Good morning to you!" Tofu-sensei bowed to Akane.

Tenchi looked at Akane. Was that a trace of a blush?

"You haven't been by in a while. No new injuries?"

"No, sir. That is, I haven't been doing anything that would..." She trailed off.

Tenchi slipped around the corner and poured the kettle over his head.

Interesting.

"So who was that guy?"

"Tofu-sensei. He's a chiropractor, and he's also our family doctor."

"Martial artist as well, right?"

He managed to sneak up on me, like he didn't even have a presence.

They turned the corner, and Tenchi could now see the high school ahead.

"Yes...he's very good. Doesn't look it, does he? Ever since I was little, he's taken care of my injuries..."

"Hm. I thought you hated men."

She darkened.

"That's right. I despise men!"

The school bell rang. From either side of the school's gates stepped men. Most of them were dressed in sports uniforms or gis, though some were in school uniform. All of them were standing ready for battle.

"What the heck-?"

"Out of my way! I'm late!"

Akane leapt into their midst. Fists and feet flew, and foe after foe was laid out in the grass.

Tenchi leapt onto the stone wall and watched the melee. "Whoa...she was going easy on me."

"Hey, Tenchi!"

"Huh?" He glanced up to see Nabiki at a third-floor window. "Hey, Nabiki! What's going on here?"

"Don't worry about it! Just get in here - you only have three minutes."

"But--"

"I said don't worry about her. She can take care of herself."

Akane's last opponent hit the ground just as Nabiki finished speaking. She mopped her brow and glowered about the field. "Honestly--every morning! I wish they'd just give it up!"

"Truly. Such a boorish lot." The speaker was a tall boy, dressed in a kendo uniform. In one hand he held a bokuto; in the other, a rose. "Evidently, each of them intends to ask you out, Akane, on the day that he can finally defeat you."

Akane's expression turned to one of long suffering. "Good morning, sempai."

He grinned. "And now, Tendo Akane..." He tossed the rose her way. "Might you fight with me?"

Tenchi dropped down beside Akane. "Is this a 'samurai wannabe'?"

"Stay out of the way. You'll get hurt."

"By him?" Tenchi scoffed.

The upperclassman raised his bokuto, pointing it at Tenchi. "You there. You are being quite familiar with Akane."

Tenchi glanced at Akane. "You want to tell him?"

"Tell him what?"

"Who are you, peasant?"

"I--"

The upperclassman cut him off. "Ah, but is it not polite to give one's own name first? Very well, I shall.

"I am the captain of the Furinkan kendo club, and the rising new star of the high school fencing world. My name is Kuno Tatewaki, but my peers call me Blue Thunder."

Thunder rumbled in the background. Above, one of Nabiki's classmates glanced over at her. "You ever heard of this 'Blue Thunder'?"

"Nope. Last I heard, he was still calling himself 'Shooting Star'."

Tenchi grinned. "So much for flashy intros. I'm staying at the Tendo dojo--"

"What? Under the same roof as Akane? I shall not permit it!" Kuno lashed out with his sword.

Tenchi dodged the swing, by simply jumping back and up. He tossed his bookbag to Akane and landed in a ready position.

"I am heir to the Saotome ryuu musabetsa kakotou and Masaki ryuu batto jutsu. My name is Masaki Tenchi, and I accept your challenge."

"I shall not permit you to continue hounding Akane! I shall bring you to justice!"

"Hounding? Who's the one doing the hounding?"

"He's only staying with us, sempai." Akane was obviously trying to inject some sanity into the moment, but Kuno seemed immune to sanity.

"Silence!" Kuno slashed, and Tenchi sidestepped. The bokuto smashed through the brick wall.

Oh, that would have stung.

Tenchi dodged another swing, leaping to the side. He leapt again, using a tree as a springboard, as Kuno's attack sliced into the tree.

"Now hold on! Let me make something perfectly clear!" Tenchi ducked a swing, and was suddenly inside Kuno's guard. "I don't know what you think I'm trying to do to Akane, but I assure you, I have no intentions towards her at this time!"

Akane gaped. What? And after he told me--ohhhh, men! Angrily, she hurled Tenchi's bookbag at his head. "You pervert!"

"Wha-" Tenchi glanced back, then leapt straight up. Kuno's swing cut his bookbag in half.

Lightning rolled in the background, highlighting Tenchi floating above Kuno.

Rain started to fall lightly.

Time seemed frozen for a second. Tenchi's hand descended to strike as Kuno raised his sword to swing...

Time moved again, and Kuno was run down by a stampeding panda.

"Wow, a panda just knocked out Kuno!"

"Man, that panda is good!"

"Damn! If it hadn't been raining--"

Tenchi and Genma were in the Phys. Ed. equipment room. Genma handed a hot water kettle to Tenchi.

"I thought you sucked without a weapon."

Tenchi glanced over to see Akane at the window. "I do! I was going for a basic disarm maneuver. And he was falling for it! Uppercrassman Kuno obviously isn't very good."

"I wouldn't be so sure. Look at your neck."

"Huh?" She felt her neck, felt a twinge of pain from a fresh bruise. "Wow...and he didn't even touch me..."

"If he had, you would be breathing through your neck. Looked like a pretty even match, don't you think?"

"Maybe." Tenchi poured the hot water over his head. "Just means I'll have to start with a bokuto next time. Then I'll probably smear him."

"Well, it does seem to be true that you were enrolled at Juuban until this year, but that doesn't change the fact that both you and Tendo Akane were late. Perhaps Juuban High begins classes somewhat later than the rest of Japan? Not that it matters. Go stand in the hall."

Standing in the hall was nothing new for Tenchi - it was a popular form of punishment throughout Japanese schools, meant to signify that the offender was not fit company for other students. However, the small placard announcing his crime - "Late for class" - and the buckets of water in each hand were a new touch.

"This is all your fault." Akane was angry. Again.

"My fault? How was it my fault that he attacked me?"

"If you had've stayed out of it like I told you..." Akane trailed off with a pout.

"What was all that about, anyway?"

"Oh...At the beginning of the school year, Kuno asked me out. I refused. So he made this big speech that anyone who wanted to ask me out had to defeat me in combat." She sighed. "Someone else asked me out, and Kuno pummeled him into the dirt. Since then, every guy in the school has been trying to beat me. Just so they can ask me out."

"That's stupid."

"Tell me about it."

"So wanna go out?"

"Huh?" She stared at him in shock.

He grinned. "Dinner and a movie. And no hand-to-hand combat. What do you say?"

"...Sure."

"Never!"

Tenchi looked up, to see Kuno standing at the end of the hall. Obviously he had overheard. Damn - don't have a bokuto.

"Never shall I allow this travesty to occur!"

"You have a problem with my asking Akane out?"

The windows to the classrooms slid open, and students leaned out.

"Akane, you're going on a date?"

"Man, that guy's really lucky."

"I thought you hated men, Akane!"

"Nope, he's not lucky - Kuno's gonna paste him!"

Kuno's scowl darkened. "No, Masaki. That is not the problem, though I shall certainly attend to that one in good time. I have been told that it is likely you shall marry Akane!"

The crowd got louder. "Marry him?"

"Akane, you're so lucky!"

"Who would have thought--"

"No!" Tenchi raised his hands, as though to stem off the tide of questions by physical force. "It was our parent's idea!"

"It's not true!" Akane shook her head.

Kuno swung at Tenchi. Tenchi stepped inside, grabbed the bokuto, and disarmed the upperclassman, sending him spinning down the hall. Kuno stabilized himself, then called out, "Sasuke! Bokuto!"

A diminutive man dressed in a ninja outfit stepped out of nowhere and handed Kuno another bokuto.

"This time the odds are more even, Kuno. Follow me, we'll take this to a more suitable place." Tenchi ran over to the window and jumped out.

"I follow." The kendoist leapt out after him.

"You idiot! This is the third floor!" Akane very carefully did NOT follow the deranged duo.

"No problem! I can--" Tenchi looked down.

There was a swimming pool below.

"Water! Why does it always have to be water!"

SPLASH

One of Akane's classmates pointed. "Look, Kuno's floating to the surface."

"But what happened to Masaki?"

Tenchi, bokken still in hand, swam as fast as she could for the edge of the pool.

Gotta get out of here...gotta get out of here...

A shadow passed overhead, and she glanced up. Kuno was floating face down near the surface.

I can't leave him to drown...

She rose up and lifted him out of the water, then resumed swimming for the edge. Kuno stirred, then grabbed her around the chest. "I fight on!"

"Ack! Let me go!"

One of Kuno's hands grabbed her breast and squeezed. Kuno stopped in shock.

"Ow!" Tenchi darkened. "Gettin' a good feel in, twit?"

She jumped clear out of the water, lifting him along with her. She pushed him away, raised the bokken and smashed him into the concrete at the edge of the pool. She leapt over the fence and was gone.