[INTERIOR - XU'S OFFICE - DAY]

[FADE IN: We see XU sitting in the windowsill, her legs crossed. She is swinging her leg back and forth, her hands clasped around her knee. Her desk is to her right, and NIDA sits in front of it, his hands clasped in his lap. Both are wearing their SeeD uniforms.]

[ZOOM IN.]

NIDA (smiling warmly)
Of course we're friends, Xu.

[XU crosses her arms over her chest and smiles conspiratorially at NIDA.]

XU
Which is exactly why I'm assigning you the task of keeping an eye out... You're the only one I can trust.

[XU exaggeratedly uncrosses her legs and re-crosses them, eyeing Nida impishly. He watches the display in silence, trying desperately not to appear impressed.]

XU cont.
Any and every indiscretion... Any step out of line, and it is to be reported directly to me. Is that understood?

[CUT TO NIDA. He glances down at Xu's legs, then right into her eyes.]

NIDA (leaning back in his chair)
Well, Xu... Thing is, I've never really had anything against the guy. I mean... I never had a personal problem with him...

[CUT TO XU. Her eyes are narrowed, but her cool smirk is firmly in place.]

XU
I'm not asking you to plant drug paraphernalia in his dorm, Nida... All I require is that you keep an eye out. A very watchful eye... I'm already working on his friend, Fujin Kawado.

[CUT TO NIDA.]

NIDA (matter-of-factly)
Sounds an awful lot like spying, to me. And spying can be hard work...

[CUT TO XU, catching the undertone in Nida's statement and nodding.]

XU
Of course... You'll be compensated for your efforts.

[CUT TO NIDA, who cocks his eyebrow and slightly lifts his chin.]

NIDA
Just how, exactly?

[CUT TO XU, who raises a hand to toy with her hair as she slides down in the windowsill, the hem of her skirt rising up her thighs.]

XU (throatily)
What would be your price?

[CUT TO NIDA, the corner of his mouth turned almost imperceptibly upward in a grin. He peers at her for a moment before speaking.]

NIDA
Can I get back to you on that?

[CUT TO XU, grinning.]

XU
Of course. Take your time. Think hard about it.

[CUT TO NIDA.]

NIDA
Oh, I'll be thinking very hard.

[CUT TO XU and NIDA. Xu lifts her arm and wiggles her fingers dismissively, but sensually. Smirking, Nida rises out of the chair and gives her a SeeD salute. He turns and walks casually for the door, pausing to look back at her before exiting.]

[CUT TO XU, who grins until the door whooshes shut. She rolls her eyes and stands, straightening her skirt.]

XU
Is there anyone in this place that isn't a total fucking loser?

[She walks over to a wooden wall cabinet and presses on it. The door springs open, revealing a stereo system and oodles of cd's.]

XU (grinning)
Besides us, that is... We are soooo fiendishly smart, aren't we?

[She runs her fingers over the cd's, perusing them. She picks out one she likes, and pulls it out.]

XU (tapping her nails on the jewel case)
What do you think, bad girl? Alice Cooper?

[She nods to herself, pressing a button on the stereo. A cd changer slides out of the system. She removes the cd from its case and places it in the changer, then puts the case back into the shelf.]

XU
The day we're having, we need something uplifting and humorous, don't we?

[She presses buttons on the stereo for a moment. Strange sound effects- ostensibly mad lab- begin to play. She smirks.]

XU (raspy)
Yes, yes... I know you're hungry...
Ah...
And here comes dinnnner...

Feeeeeed myyyyyy...
Frankensteeeeiiin!

[Xu giggles as hard music fills the room. Singing along, she walks over to the window.]

XU (dramatically)
Well I ain't evil
I'm just good-lookin'

[She grabs the miniblind string and begins to lower the blinds, but something outside catches her eye.]

Start a little fire
And baby start cookin'...

[CUT TO QUAD, XU's POV. FUJIN and RAJIN are walking out from underneath a tree. Fujin appears to be wiping away tears.]

[CLOSE UP of XU's FACE through the window. Her expression is dark, amused, and satisfied. The blinds lower in front of her face.]

I'm a hungry maaaan
But I don't want pizza

[CUT TO XU as she turns from the window and does a very silly air guitar dance to the middle of the room.]

I'll blow down your house
And then I'm gonna EAT ya!...
Bring you to a simmer right on time
Run my greasy fingers
Up your greasy spine!...
Feeeed myyyyy Frankensteeeeeiiiin!
Meet my libido
He's a psycho...
Feeeed myyyyy Frankensteeeeeiiiin!
Hungry for love
And its' feeding tiiiime!

[Suddenly the buzzer on her desk rings, and she slumps her shoulders.]

XU
We can't even enjoy Alice, baby... This place sucks the joy out of everything!

You don't wanna talk
So baby shut up-

[She walks swiftly over to the stereo and turns it off, then slowly to intercom buzzer. She clears her throat, then depresses the button.]

XU (cheerfully)
Yes, sir?

CID (V.O.)
Have you placed the appropriate calls to the appropriate parties?

XU (making a nasty face)
Yes, sir! Commander Leonhart is on his way now. Quistis should be here in about ten minutes.

[She twists her face comically and mimicks him.]

CID (V.O.)
Excellent!... Please make certain that we are not disturbed... And tell anyone who comes up here that I won't be taking visitors for a while, and send them back down. Thanks, Xu.

XU
Yes, sir.

[The intercom crackles off, and Xu makes an obscene gesture with her fist.]

XU
Right-o, Captain Tard-o!

[She grins impishly and sits down in her chair. Tilting her head thoughtfully, she taps her fingernails against the desk for a moment. Then, nodding, she reaches over to the telephone and yanks the receiver off of the cradle, swiftly punching numbers with her other hand. She brings the receiver to her face and leans back in her chair.]

XU (crossing her legs)
Vale! Omihyne! You will never fucking guess who Cid has up here with him!... Seifer Almasy!... Yes!... I know!... He looks pretty wired. I think you'd better get some people up here, in case he tries anything... Great!... Thanks, Vale!... Bye-bye!

[She places the receiver back onto the cradle, and leans all the way back in her chair, her hands folded on her stomach.]

XU (lowly)
Feed myyyyy Frankensteeiiin...
Meet my libido...
He's a psyyyyyychooooo!

[CUT OUT.]




"Feed My Frankenstein" by Alice Cooper