Disclaimer

I am a poor starving artist with no intentions of making money off of this. I own absolutely none of the characters herein, and have created this sheerly for my own enjoyment and the enjoyment of anyone who reads it. Please don't sue me.

This Side Down

Chapter Ten

No Need for Rivalry

Morning at the Masaki household.

The dining room was very quiet. Around the table sat Tenchi, Akane, Kasumi, Katsuhito and Ayeka. In front of Tenchi was a small bowl of soup. Tenchi eyed the soup with some trepidation. Earlier that morning, most of the household had awakened to the sound of battle. But upon arriving at the scene, those ready to defend the house learned that the horrible racket, the battle cries, and the sound of metal on metal, was not a battle. Or at least not a conventional one.

It was merely Akane trying to boil a pot of water to make a small bowl of instant soup.

"Um...perhaps I should make you something to eat, Tenchi."

"No, no, Kasumi. I told Akane I was going to help her learn to cook." He looked at the soup again. "And besides, it's--"

"Don't say it, Tenchi. Don't say anything."

Tenchi looked at Akane. She was staring at the table, her hands folded in front of her. Tenchi picked up the bowl and sipped the soup.

Everyone watched him with bated breath. He set down the soup bowl.

"Pretty good."

"Really?" Hope shone from Akane's eyes.

"Yep. Now tomorrow, you get to practise boiling water without waking the entire household."

"Tenchi?"

Tenchi pulled the hat off his face and looked up from the beach recliner. Kasumi stood over him, a pitcher of lemonade and a glass in hand.

"Yes, Kasumi?"

"Lemonade?"

"Thank you!" He took the glass, and she filled it from the pitcher. He sipped, and sighed. "Excellent, Kasumi. Perfect on a hot day like this, too." He leaned back in the recliner, then noticed that Kasumi had not yet left. "Something wrong?"

"No, no..." She ran her hand nervously through her short-cropped hair. "I was just thinking...I found a really nice restaurant in town, and I though you and I could go there for lunch today."

"I think that's a great idea. Hmmm...could we go this evening, for dinner, instead?"

"I suppose. Why tonight?"

"Remember? I kinda promised to help Akane with cooking today..."

"Ah. Do you think that's wise?"

"Kasumi...you think she's gonna get any better without help?"

"I'm not sure she will with help."

"Kasumi, that's not like you at all."

"Yes, it is. Tenchi, I've spent a lot of time trying to help her. But she simply doesn't have the patience to learn."

"Well...I told her I'd help her. And I will."

Kasumi sat down on the dock next to his recliner, putting her feet into the water. "I suppose that's one of the things I...like about you." She smiled. "You're always ready to help someone, and you always keep your word. If you can."

Tenchi grinned. "I suppose that's the province of a prince."

"Hm?"

"I guess you're the only one who hasn't heard." He rolled over to face her. "You probably won't believe this, but...It turns out that Grandfather is half-alien, which makes me something like one-eighth alien. Furthermore, he's some kind of prince on his world, but gave up the title...which makes me the next prince. Though he says it's unlikely I'd ever be accepted by them."

"I...see."

He rolled back over. "Just like I guessed."

"No, Tenchi. I do believe you."

"Right."

"Tenchi. We are living with an alien demon and two alien princesses. I watched two giant spaceships land in the lake." She smiled. "What's wrong with you being an alien prince?"

Tenchi laughed. "Well, then, there you go. If you marry me, you'll be marrying into royalty. Just in case you need a reason."

She reached out and put her hand on his. "I don't need a reason, Tenchi..."

"Hey, you two! How's it going?" Nabiki, P-Chan under one arm, stepped onto the dock.

Tenchi jumped to his feet. "Umm, great, Nabiki."

"Akane was muttering something about making lunch..."

"I better go help her." He ran for the house, glad of the escape.

Kasumi stood. "Oh, my...I need to check the laundry."

Nabiki watched them go, then looked down at the pig. "P-chan, tonight you're following those two. They're far too close. I can't let Kasumi steal Tenchi away from me." She frowned. "She could do it just on niceness. I'm not really good at nice...Any suggestions, P-Chan?"

"Bwee!"

"Kind of dumb of me to ask you like this...pigs can't talk. Well, after lunch...off to the hot springs!"

"Excuse my interruption..."

Kasumi paused, sheet in hand, clothespeg in mouth. "Mmf?"

Ayeka bowed to her - a very shallow bow, but then, she was royalty. "You are the mistress of the house?"

Kasumi folded the sheet, placed it in the laundry basket and removed the clothespeg from her mouth. "No, I am afraid I am not."

"Oh?" Ayeka looked confused. "But I have seen you do most of the cooking and cleaning..."

"Katsuhito is a bit untidy at times, and since he is allowing me to stay here, along with my sisters, I felt I should repay him by doing some of the housework. Just as your sister has helped, as well. But I am not his wife."

"Wife?" It was Ayeka's turn to look confused. "No, of course not. You see, I was hoping to have something prepared for Lord Yosho."

"Lord Yosho?"

"Yes. The Lord of the house."

"Oh, you mean Masaki-san."

"...I guess so. There is a traditional pastry from our home that he was always very fond of, but I am uncertain as to what ingredients will be available for it."

"Perhaps I can help you with that. Let me just finish this, and then we'll see what's available." Kasumi resumed taking down the laundry. "From what I heard, your homeworld is quite Earthlike."

Ayeka nodded. "As we were arriving here, Kamidake informed me that Earth was a colony world of Jurai."

"Really?" Kasumi looked amused. "So your people are just like us."

"Please!" Ayeka snorted. "Technology on Jurai has outstripped this backwater planet by an order of magnitude. Our lifespans are ten times that of your people, and this has led to art and culture far more sophisticated than that of your world. We have energy manipulation powers beyond those of your race, granted to us by the Trees of Life. We are in every way superior to your people."

"So why is it that Masaki-san chose to live here?"

"He has merely forgotten what it is to be Juraian. Once I have reminded him of how great our culture is, he will return with me to where he belongs."

"I sincerely doubt that Masaki-san would abandon his family."

"...Family? I thought his daughters were dead."

"Yes, but Tenchi is his grandson, and Nodoka is sort of an adopted daughter. not to mention his son-in-law, Genma."

Ayeka looked flabbergasted. "He has borne male issue..." She slumped. "Tenchi is Crown Prince of Jurai!"

"A mere human."

"Tenchi is Juraian!" Ayeka snarled. "He has human blood, it is true, but so does Yosho, and he was ratified as Crown Prince. Father was married to that bitch Funaho, and they accepted her as Empress. Human blood is Juraian blood, you know that! The Council knows it too, and they don't like it, but they can no longer force Yosho to serve as Emperor!"

"Tenchi says they probably wouldn't accept him as Emperor."

"They would have precious little choice. Since Yosho has a male descendent, he can abdicate as Crown Prince. But since that leaves Tenchi as heir, with a stronger claim than anyone else could hope for...Damn you, Yoshi!" Her face was a mask of rage. "Even in this way, you find a way to cheat me!" She stopped, gasping for breath.

Kasumi had been watching her tirade with great interest. "I take it the pastry is off?"

Ayeka glared at her, but then an odd look crossed her face. "No, no...I'd still like that, if it's not too much trouble..."

Kasumi smiled and nodded, but inwardly, she worried.

This one bears watching...

"All right! What are we making for lunch?"

Tenchi smiled at Akane's enthusiasm. The girl was a study in contrasts - one moment a bubbly, cheerful, happy person; the next moment, wracked with self-doubt, depression and angst; the next, rage personified.

"Well, first off, I hate to break it to you, but you're not doing all of lunch. Sasami's doing the sukiyaki and rice. You're doing salad."

"Salad? That's it?"

"Yep. Basics, remember. And the first thing to do is..." He gestured towards the sink. "Wash your hands."

"Right."

"Hello, Tenchi!"

Tenchi turned to see Nodoka walk in. "Hi, Mom! Where've you been?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Kikuko asked me to stay last night."

"Ah."

"Why? Were you looking for me?"

"Well, sorta. I've had a lot of things come down on me all at once, and kinda needed someone to talk about it with..."

"Why not one of your girlfriends?"

"Well, that's sorta what I ended up doing."

"Good. Tenchi, don't hesitate to go to those who love you with your problems. Self-reliance is manly, but so is admitting when you need the support of your family and friends."

"You tell him!" Akane finished drying her hands. "Now what?"

"Get the lettuce, the radishes and the peppers and wash them."

"Wash them?"

"Yes. Unless you like eating dirt."

"No, I mean...Never mind. I'm just stupid, is all."

Sasami shook her head. "No, you're not. You're just a beginner."

"Thanks, Sasami."

Nodoka smiled. "Can I get in on this party?"

"Sure, Mom. Sasami can handle the rice, but I'm not sure about sukiyaki. Apparently they don't have that dish on her home planet."

"...her home planet."

"Yeah. She's an alien."

Nodoka shook her head, looking bemused. "Kids and their imagination, eh?"

"Right. Run with that."

"Lunch time!"

Akane set the bowl of salad on the table. Nabiki peered at it.

"Salad, eh? Good choice - no spicing or heat involved."

"Nabiki!"

"Not too likely it's gonna be toxic. Wow, those green peppers are cut really interestingly."

"Perhaps Ryoko would like this dish as much as she liked Akane-san's curry."

"Yep. Only a demon can eat toxic sludge."

"Now, Nabiki, Akane put a lot of effort into this salad." Nodoka set two more serving dishes on the table. "At least you can try it."

Ayeka shook her head. "I fear, Cousin, that Nabiki-san speaks the truth. I have watched Lord Tenchi try eating Akane-san's cooking. She is a superior cook to myself...but that still is not saying much."

"Cousin?" Nodoka looked puzzled.

"Uh, Saotome-san...you're telling me that she spent time on this salad?"

"Of course."

"What kind of flowers would you like at the funeral?"

"Now, that was just in bad taste."

"No, that salad is--"

"Enough!" Akane looked ready to explode. "Nabiki, for your information, I had Tenchi on one side of me and Nodoka on the other, telling me exactly what to do. And all I really did was cut up the vegetables and put them in the bowl. They did the rest, okay?"

"Ummm...Akane...all there was left to do once you finished was add the dressing. You made the salad."

"Really?" Akane looked confused. "But you told me there was more to do, but you'd do it..."

"That was mostly to make sure you stopped." Tenchi shrugged. "Basically, this was an exercise in knife use. Oh, by the way, Grandfather, we need a new cutting board."

"Coming through!" Sasami, pitcher of lemonade in hand, came out of the kitchen. She set the pitcher on the table, then ran back into the kitchen.

Nodoka watched her, a look of amusement on her face. "What a delightful little girl."

"Well..." Nabiki looked doubtful. "I guess it should be safe." She reached for the salad tongs.

"No!" Akane snatched them away from her. "The first serving for Tenchi."

"Right." Nabiki smirked. "Almost forgot."

Akane placed a small bowl of salad in front of Tenchi. He picked up his fork, speared a slice of tomato and popped it into his mouth.

And promptly changed colour. Sort of a greenish blue.

"I knew it!" Nabiki looked disgusted. "Akane can even wreck something that needs no preparation, with two experienced cooks standing over her shoulder."

"No..." Tenchi gagged, and managed to get the bite down. "The dressing...it's just horrible."

"Oh."

Akane deflated. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault."

"It is! I made that dressing last night."

Tenchi stood up and picked up the salad. "Don't worry, Akane. Tomorrow you can try again."

"Okay."

"Of course, tonight you'll be on your own, unless you can persuade Mom to help you."

"What?" Akane looked up.

"Well, Kasumi and I are going to dinner--"

"Oh, so with one breath, you promise to help me learn to cook, and in the next--Tenchi no baka!" She grabbed the pitcher of lemonade and hurled it at Tenchi.

"Oh my..."

Ayeka, Sasami and Nodoka gaped at Tenchi. A suddenly female Tenchi.

"What on earth..."

"Wow! That's neat!"

"Lord Tenchi...what has happened to you?"

Akane winced. "I'm sorry, Tenchi...I'd almost forgotten about that."

"Yeah, it's been a while, hasn't it?" Tenchi grinned, and tightened her belt. "Oh, by the way, Mom...while Pop and I were in China, I sort of picked up this odd little...curse."

"Excuse me, Lord Tenchi."

"Lord Tenchi?" Tenchi looked at Ayeka oddly. She was standing just outside his bedroom doorway, a small plate in her hand. On the plate was a small pastry that looked like a danish, but not quite.

"May I come in?"

"I suppose."

She stepped in, knelt, and placed the pastry before him. "Will you accept this?"

"I guess...thanks." He was puzzled by the formality...but she was offering food. Ayeka stood, stepped out of the room, and closed the door.

"You do realize, Ayeka, that that was probably a pointless gesture."

Ayeka gasped in surprise, and whirled to face Katsuhito.

"I don't know what you mean, brother."

"You know exactly what I mean. And you should know full well that Tenchi is Terran in upbringing. He'll not think of your little 'gift' as anything more than a snack."

"This does not matter. It's merely my way of thanking him...for all that he's done for us."

Katsuhito turned and walked down the hallway. "I may have been on Earth for more than eight hundred years, Ayeka...but I still remember what it meant when you gave me a 'gift' of that sort."

Ayeka watched him go, hate burning in her eyes.

The bus alighted at the station, and Tenchi, Kasumi and Nabiki hopped off. Nabiki waved to Tenchi and Kasumi and made an immediate beeline for the shopping district, P-Chan under her arm. Kasumi watched her go with some misgivings.

"I'm not sure I trust this, Tenchi. She seemed to make far too much of the fact that she was only going shopping..."

"Don't worry, Kasumi. I'm sure she's not getting into any trouble..."

"You don't know Nabiki quite as well as you should. I'm certain she came into town to keep an eye on us."

"Let her." Tenchi shrugged. "It's not like I have any dishonourable intentions towards you. This is just dinner for two, right?"

"I guess. I'm glad I didn't tell her what restaurant we're going to." Kasumi stepped closer to him and took his arm. "So let's go have some fun!" Giggling, she towed Tenchi down the street.

Unnoticed by either, a small black pig moved from shadow to shadow, trying to stay hidden while remaining close enough to hear their conversation. Ryouga was not overly concerned with Tenchi getting attached to Kasumi. Kasumi was a very nice girl, and very beautiful, too. As far as he was concerned, his old friend could hardly do better, and it gladdened his heart to see Tenchi obviously having a good time.

But at the same time, Ryouga had managed to acquire a duty to Nabiki, and this bit of espionage was part of the deal. Well, he had agreed to spy for her, but that was his limit. Any dirty work she wanted done, she'd have to do herself.

Unfortunately, a pot-bellied pig just cannot move as fast as a human, at least not as fast as the humans he was trying to follow were moving. Eventually he would be left behind. He abandoned stealth and started moving at a dead run, and managed to keep Tenchi and Kasumi in view until they entered the restaurant.

Ryouga realized that the odds of his managing to get into the restaurant in his current form were awfully low; and the odds of his becoming dinner once he got in there were depressingly high. He decided to double back and report to Nabiki.

If he could find her.

Oh, man, not again!

The restaurant was quite nice, a small out-of-the-way place that specialized in Italian food. Tenchi grinned at this - Italian had long been one of his favourites. Of course, he knew that the food here would only bear a passing resemblance to true Italian food, but still...

The couple were ushered to a small table in the corner. Tenchi checked out the restaurant as they walked to the table. "No live band, no maitre d', no offensive extras...a very nice restaurant without being overpowering. Unusual."

"I told you you'd like it."

"You did, didn't you?" He grinned.

The waitress set the menus in front of them and moved off. Tenchi picked up the menu and was about to open it, when Kasumi laid a hand on his.

"Hm?"

"Tenchi..." She looked a bit nervous, which was doing nothing for his own composure. "I need to talk to you about Ayeka."

"Ayeka?"

"Earlier today she threw a royal temper tantrum. She was horribly upset to find out you were Katsuhito's grandson."

"I see..." He frowned. "And yet, she went out of her way to be nice to me later. Even brought me a danish."

"A danish?" Kasumi's eyebrows went up. "That pastry she asked me to make...she told me it was for Katsuhito."

"Really?" Tenchi looked puzzled. "I wonder why she gave it to me instead?"

Kasumi opened her mouth to reply, and paused. If he doesn't know, I suppose I shouldn't tell him...But I must give him some kind of warning...

"Just watch yourself around her, Tenchi. She's more than eight hundred years old, and probably spent most of that time dealing in power politics."

"All right, Kasumi. I'll remember that."

Kasumi smiled at him. "The lasagne is quite good here."

Tenchi and Kasumi stepped into the house, to hear groans and mutterings. Tenchi raised an eyebrow. Kasumi sighed. "You see?"

"Look, Kasumi, I know that Akane isn't the best cook--"

"Tenchi..." Akane was leaning against the kitchen door frame, looking wretched. "The teriyaki didn't come out quite right."

Kasumi sighed. "I'll start treating the others for food poisoning."

"No, Kasumi..." She smiled weakly. "I tasted it first...the others didn't have any."

"All right." She smiled, and helped Akane towards her room. "I'll just treat you."

"Arigato, oneechan."

Tenchi shook his head. "She was supposed to do the salad." He walked towards his room, but stopped when he heard a strangled gasp, coming from Nabiki's room. He turned, and knocked on the door. "Nabiki? You okay?"

"I'm fine, Tenchi."

Tenchi frowned. Something didn't sound right in her voice. "Can I come in?"

"...I guess."

Tenchi opened the door and stepped in. Nabiki was sitting on the bed, facing away from him, head bowed. He walked over to her, and put a hand on her shoulder.

Nabiki turned, stood up and hugged him fiercely. Tenchi was surprised by this - Nabiki was the last person he expected to act like this. He tentatively put his arms around her, returning the hug. They stood that way for a moment or two, then Nabiki stepped back suddenly.

"I've decided to give you a deal, Tenchi-kun. We go back to Nerima day after tomorrow, right?"

"Uh...yeah."

"We should hit town around four in the afternoon. Say a couple of hours to unwind after the trip...I would like to take you to the fair that evening."

"Um...sure, I guess. Why is this a deal?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Nabiki smirked. "I'm paying."

"Aheh...right."

"Don't forget."

"I won't."

"Good. Now get out. I have to finish packing." She turned him about physically, pushed him out the door, and slammed it behind him.

Tenchi shook his head, bemused. "What an odd girl."