It was so quiet. The lights were dimmed and the hallways were cleared of
every patient. The nurses were dozing off in their little office, with
their little chairs, and their little coffee cups, just trying to make sure
everyone else unworthy to wander the halls at that moment were hidden
beneath their covers in their rooms. I was alone in my room. There was a
time when many had slept beside me, a child named Lily, Noodles was there
with me for a while, and a woman named Iris too used to dwell in the same
room as I. I cannot remember why they left me.except for little Lily. She
was there because she had attempted to kill herself by slitting her wrists.
Several strands of long messy scars, punished her skin when she first
arrived, I eyed them forever, wondering why such a pretty little girl would
wish to hurt herself. She was pretty, I recall. She had long honey curls,
that bounced when she walked, with bright emerald eyes, and ivory skin that
felt like ice if you were brave enough to touch it.
When she sat down next to me in the freezing room, her long mangled arms wrapped around her tiny form and I noticed she was ready to speak. She wanted to talk to me.she wanted to open her pretty little lips and tell me something oh so dreadfully important. She wanted to tell me how her soul was tortured, how her father murdered her mother, how her mother murdered her brother, how everyone was unkind, but I did not wish to listen. When I do not wish for something, it is usually prevented.either that or it was prolonged.
My mind did that thing it does.where I forget who I am and where I am. I forget so much. I forget. I forget. I forget. I hurt her. That I remember.I always remember afterwards and I want to forget. I hurt her horribly. Perhaps she wanted her life. I forget. All I remember is the screaming and that poppy water pouring from my hands into the sink of the metallic bathroom.
I wonder if anyone remembers what I did, because the pain is starting to build. Not to mention the guilt.
"Hello Jill. I was afraid you wouldn't wake up." My concentration was ruined by that same small man who fed me the wicked drug that forced me to dream of things I do remember. I did not stare at him with my usual tired eyes; in fact, the ground was paid quite a bit of my attention in his stead.
"You were afraid for me. How kind of you to be afraid. I was afraid as well." Surprisingly, my voice was calm and smooth. I sounded like my old self. Not only was I surprised with my comfortable tone, so was the Shrink. He sat down be side me, by my bed, pulling the blankets away from my knees. My blue outfit that resembled Alice's had vanished and in its place was a thin black fabric. It did not highlight my prettier features.
"What were you afraid of?" he asked, taking the blanket and folding it over my feet neatly.
For a long moment, I was silent and I think he really did believe I could not speak at all. "I have a riddle." I told him, snatching the blanket and pulling it over me again.my body began to shiver. Suddenly I was so cold.so very cold.it hurt to shiver. Still, he nodded, ignoring my sudden shaking. "What has no spine, but in its place a string? It is pale as a vampire, as silent as the night, as delicate as a glass window, but resembles a girl? It is not real.it is artificial, but the feelings can be real when one creates them for the thing. Do you know what it is love? Answer the riddle for me, please?
He narrowed his bright eyes, thinking it over as if it were a life or death situation, but he did not get to answer the riddle, for Noodle had entered the room and was screaming at the top of his lungs "Oh, Alice! It's a Puppet! A puppet! A delicate puppet!" He laughed insanely, slamming the door and running off, several nurses following behind him.
I smiled softly and took his hands in mine. "He's right you know. It was a puppet. I was afraid of the puppet." I began to cry. I began to scream. I began to sob and shout and tell him how much I hated being Alice. How much I despised being part of something that I shouldn't have been part of. And then.I told him I remembered.
When she sat down next to me in the freezing room, her long mangled arms wrapped around her tiny form and I noticed she was ready to speak. She wanted to talk to me.she wanted to open her pretty little lips and tell me something oh so dreadfully important. She wanted to tell me how her soul was tortured, how her father murdered her mother, how her mother murdered her brother, how everyone was unkind, but I did not wish to listen. When I do not wish for something, it is usually prevented.either that or it was prolonged.
My mind did that thing it does.where I forget who I am and where I am. I forget so much. I forget. I forget. I forget. I hurt her. That I remember.I always remember afterwards and I want to forget. I hurt her horribly. Perhaps she wanted her life. I forget. All I remember is the screaming and that poppy water pouring from my hands into the sink of the metallic bathroom.
I wonder if anyone remembers what I did, because the pain is starting to build. Not to mention the guilt.
"Hello Jill. I was afraid you wouldn't wake up." My concentration was ruined by that same small man who fed me the wicked drug that forced me to dream of things I do remember. I did not stare at him with my usual tired eyes; in fact, the ground was paid quite a bit of my attention in his stead.
"You were afraid for me. How kind of you to be afraid. I was afraid as well." Surprisingly, my voice was calm and smooth. I sounded like my old self. Not only was I surprised with my comfortable tone, so was the Shrink. He sat down be side me, by my bed, pulling the blankets away from my knees. My blue outfit that resembled Alice's had vanished and in its place was a thin black fabric. It did not highlight my prettier features.
"What were you afraid of?" he asked, taking the blanket and folding it over my feet neatly.
For a long moment, I was silent and I think he really did believe I could not speak at all. "I have a riddle." I told him, snatching the blanket and pulling it over me again.my body began to shiver. Suddenly I was so cold.so very cold.it hurt to shiver. Still, he nodded, ignoring my sudden shaking. "What has no spine, but in its place a string? It is pale as a vampire, as silent as the night, as delicate as a glass window, but resembles a girl? It is not real.it is artificial, but the feelings can be real when one creates them for the thing. Do you know what it is love? Answer the riddle for me, please?
He narrowed his bright eyes, thinking it over as if it were a life or death situation, but he did not get to answer the riddle, for Noodle had entered the room and was screaming at the top of his lungs "Oh, Alice! It's a Puppet! A puppet! A delicate puppet!" He laughed insanely, slamming the door and running off, several nurses following behind him.
I smiled softly and took his hands in mine. "He's right you know. It was a puppet. I was afraid of the puppet." I began to cry. I began to scream. I began to sob and shout and tell him how much I hated being Alice. How much I despised being part of something that I shouldn't have been part of. And then.I told him I remembered.