Author's Notes: Thank you for the kind words (and set to music too!). Anyways, if you recognize a myth, go ahead mention it in the review section-making a glossary is time consuming and I think having one would be neat for those who aren't familiar with a lot of them. Of course, it's all you, babe. :) And as always, advice, suggestions, and criticism are welcome and encouraging.

The Trial

Koura was dreaming she was back in Chicunauhmictlan, in the house with no windows, washing plates for food and a place to sleep.

"Make sure to get the blood spots off," Miclancihuatl had watched her work carefully. "You know how Mictlantecuhtli hates blood in his food."

"He hates it," mumbled Koura.

"Hates what?" Miclancihuatl tapped her on the head.

"What?" Koura blinked. The house with no windows blurred and faded, spinning away, and then she saw the vaulted ceiling of an Olympian room above her. The night stars were still visible, although she could see Eos slowly beginning to wake in the east.

"You were talking in your sleep," Bacchus looked down at her fondly. "I didn't know you still did that." Koura yawned and levered herself up out of bed.

"Hi, weekday-dad. What time is it?"

"An hour or two before things heat up," Bacchus chuckled.

"Oh Bach, for shame." Koura winced. "Not so early in the morning, okay?" She kicked the blankets off and stood up, swaying. "No puns before breakfast."

"Speakin' of which," Bacchus pulled out the plate he'd been hiding behind his ample back. Which was good, because it was an ample plate.

"I can't eat all that." Koura stared at the mounds of fried ambrosia and diced fruit and nectar pudding.

"Of course you can," Bacchus set it down on the room's small table. "You're my daughter."

Koura couldn't help herself, despite the lingering traces of the dream. She laughed weakly, and then leaned into her stepfather's embrace. "I am, aren't I?"

"Yes," said Bacchus. His voice grew serious. "And no matter what happens, no matter what Zeus says before today ends," He patted her head. "Your mother and I will do our best to change his mind. Okay? Stop looking so down in the mouth."

"You're such a bad liar," Koura mumbled into his shoulder. "Zeus won't listen to anyone. Although," She pulled away, feeling childish. "I can see Demeter nailing my feet to the floor in protest."

"If she had her way you'd be conjoined twins," Bacchus held her at arms' length and looked her in the eye. "But she has missed you more than you can possibly imagine. I have too."

"I know," Koura shifted uncomfortably. "But it's not really my decision. As soon as today is over I've got to leave. The invitation was only for the weekend. And my boss needs her chariot back."

"We'll see. You never know what a single day might bring."

She had to agree with him there. "That's certainly one thing I've learned over the years."

"See? I'm not wrong about everything. Now eat up, clean up and dress up. Luckily we'll resolve this whole Titan hooha quick. From your letters, I think you have some stories to tell." He chuckled, a deep rumble. "And then we'll catch up on a eons' worth of celebrations you've missed."

***

***

The Horae waited out at the gates of Olympus in the early light before dawn. The sun shot it's brilliant rays across the sky, lighting up the unearthly palace in lavender shades of gold.

"You think he'll show?" asked Dike.

Eunomia peered at the horizon from where she sat on the palace steps. She could just see the little blue dot that was Hermes, keeping watch at the very edge of Olympus's sphere. "If he does, we'll know soon enough."

Eirene paced back and forth silently. They were guards, not jailers. None of them had ever been asked to do something like this. "Has Sister come yet?"

"Yes," said Eunomia, checking for the hundredth time the chains Hephaestus had given her. "I met her at the gates this morning." She fiddled with the steely golden links

"Athena wasn't too happy. I think she was hoping to make the decree."

"She'd have had to fight Zeus for it. That's why Astraea came all this way. We actually had to go up into the Firmament to get an impartial judge. One that outranked Zeus, anyways. It seems Hades' reputation precedes him."

            "Speaking of which," said Dike, suddenly bristling.

            A black spot had appeared on the horizon. Hermes flipped and signaled back to the Horae.

            "Slap me silly and call me Sisyphus," Eunomia stood and stretched. "Looks like we won't have to have Nemesis hunt him down."

            "More work for us. Positions, sisters." Dike gripped her spear and watched the black chariot approach. Hermes, who had by now abandoned his post, arrived far ahead of Hades.

            "He's got some ex-mortal in the wheelbarrow with him," Hermes scratched his head. "Doesn't look a dangerous cat, though."

            "Hmph. We'll chain them both if necessary." Eirene picked up one end of the chain while her sister held onto the other.

            "I'll go tell the dirty dozen that he showed up," Hermes tipped his hat. "Good luck, babes."

The Horae were silent as the black chariot rolled to a stop in front of them. Hades let go of the reins and the griffin pulling it dissolved into smoke.

"Hellloo ladies," Hades grinned at the three sisters. "You're looking particularly lovely on this fine morning."

"Can it, Hades." Eirene stepped up with her chain. "Hands out in front."

He laughed, raising his hands defensively. "Hey now, don't you think you're being a little..."

Eunomia looped the chain around his hands as Eirene flipped it up around his neck, and they both pulled it tight. "Drastic? Eirene? What do you think?"

"I don't know. Dike? Your feelings on the matter?"

Dike brandished her weapon. "I think you're lucky I don't put your eyes out, traitor."

"Whoa, okay. Have it your way." Hades' voice had dropped to a growl. "Just watch this thing. I bruise easy, you know."

Eunomia glanced at the confused shade in the chariot. "What about the mortal?"

"I'm entitled to representation," protested Hades. "Astraea's rules."

Dike snorted, but stepped aside as the shade stepped onto the cloudbank.

"This is Olympus?" The shade looked around. "It's beautiful."

"Snap out of it starry-eyes," said the chain-bound god. "Remember you've got a job to do."

"Hop to, Lord Hades." Dike poked him in the back. "They're waiting."

"Hey, I'm going? See my steps? Stop with the sharp thing already. Sheesh, you'd think I was a criminal or something."

**

The minor gods had assembled in the center hall, which had been resculpted into the general form of an amphitheater. Now all they had to do was wait. Which was more difficult for some of them than others.

"And the next thing I knew I had this! I guess that'll teach me to eat grass," Glaucus pointed to his fishes' tail. "Crazy, huh?"

"Completely insane," replied Koura. She wondered what was worse; the reek of seaweed or...

"So have I told you about Scylla?" Glaucus asked. Koura winced. Or that. Demeter must have been getting rusty with her matchmaking.

"Yeah, you did. " She gave up trying to avoid talking to him; besides, he was sort of interesting. If a bit strange in his tastes. "So the whole fanged drooling cannibal thing doesn't bother you?"

"Nah, I like my women wild. Besides," The sea god shrugged. "It's love. Love makes you do crazy things."

"Literally," Koura craned her neck around the hall. Luckily they'd gotten a seat right up front. "Hey, who's the judge?"

"I think she's Astraea. Big justice goddess out and up in the Firmament. Hera had to really beseech her to get her to preside."

"Wow, she's impressive." The Titaness wore a dark blue robe studded with jewels, made to look like the night sky. She was sitting bolt upright in the judge's seat, a great podium at the center back of the stage. Her dark, tightly pulled hair was streaked with swirls of gray. She seemed to be quietly scanning the audience.

Glaucus flopped in his seat, trying to get more comfortable. "She's a Titan. She's supposed to be."

"Haven't seen one in a while." Koura fiddled with the hem of her robe, picking at the rough stitches. "When does this thing start, anyhow? I'm getting cramped."

Indeed, the main hall was full to bursting with minor gods, demigods and others. Even Underworld creatures were scattered among the heavenly and mortal monsters. There were many more present for Hades' trial than there had been for Hercules' wedding. The only ones missing were the twelve Olympians, who had a private box to the left of the amphitheater.

"Should be anytime now," Glaucus brushed a dirty feather off his scales. "I wish the harpies would settle down."

"They smell a fight, I think." Koura settled back in her seat. Could be a good show. Her hangover was pretty much gone, and the strangeness of being back home (if you could call it that) had faded. She was feeling more like her regular self.

A rumble of thunder and clash of shields announced the Olympians' entrance. Zeus and Hera entered, followed by Apollo, Artemis, Hermes, Ares, Poseidon, Athena, Demeter and Bacchus (Koura waved), Aphrodite and finally Hephaestus, limping along at the back. The amphitheater started cheering. Zeus flashed a big smile and waved at the crowd. Hera pinched him and pushed him into his seat.

"Zeus," Glaucus snorted derisively. "He sure loves the spotlight doesn't he?"

Koura glanced over in surprise, then smirked. "You know, I didn't like you until just this moment."

The sea god looked startled, and then smiled. "You don't beat around the bush. And 'didn't'?"

"Yeah. You just got indirect insult points."

"Best kind, except for direct insult points. Want some popcorn?"

Koura took a piece and cracked it between her teeth, sighing. "And he gives me food. My heart is gone. It's really too bad you're already seeing a monstrous beast."

"That's my little sweetness, tentacles and all." The light in the hall abruptly faded. "Oh, it's starting. Should we boo?"

"You always boo the villain." A chorus of jeers erupted all around them, even from some of the more unpleasant creatures. Hades had appeared through an arch on the right of the stage, led in by the Horae and bound in Hephaestus' chains. A small mortal shade scuttled in behind the three guardian sisters, looking about nervously.

"How you folks doing tonight? Havin' a good time?" Hades smiled coldly and waved as best he could. The catcalls redoubled. "Thanks, thanks. I'm here every Friday! Be sure to visit our lovely gift shop on your way out."

"That's enough, Lord Hades." Astraea looked at the lord of the dead stonily. "This is a trial, not an audition." She shifted her gaze down to the mortal shade. "And are you the representation?"

"Yes ma'm." Squeaked the lawyer, cringing under the Titan gaze.

"Very well. We will hear the charges as they have been presented to me by the Olympian council." She withdrew a scroll from the podium and opened it. It unrolled all the way to the floor and rattled almost to the spectator's seats. There was a murmur among the crowd. Zeus and Athena looked satisfied at the reaction.

"Wow. Someone's been busy," Koura took a bit more of the popcorn.

"You have no idea. This is only the hostile takeover stuff." Glaucus's tail smacked the floor in anger. "He redirected a river a few years back. Completely screwed up the tides for about a month. That was rough."

"Redirected a river? Why?"

"Some sort of property line issue. But I guarantee you, it's not on that scroll because Zeus wasn't on the receiving end."

Astraea was still reading, "...one count of kidnapping, one count of child endangerment..."

"Your honor," the little shade stepped forward, "There's no direct evidence that links my lor... my client...with the events that transpired twenty years ago. No one had placed him at the scene. There are also no witnesses. I move to have these charges stricken from the record, as they have no bearing on the trial being held here today."

"Olympians?" Astraea looked over at the gods, "Have you any witnesses to these events?"

The Olympians began to talk among themselves, and then they began to argue. Ares bellowed loudly. "What do you mean the Fates wouldn't come?!" Koura looked over at Hades, who was watching them with an amused, smug expression.

"Score one on a technicality and a bribe." Koura leaned over to Glaucus. "I wonder how he bought off the Fates."

"Got me. I never met them."

"I am striking these charges," boomed Astraea. "For lack of evidence." The whole room began to boo. Hades just grinned at them, clearly enjoying the upset.

"As for the issue of the attack on Mount Olympus," Astraea ran her finger down the scroll. "I have five counts of hostile prisoner release, over a dozen counts of deity assault and imprisonment, several million drachmas worth of property damage..."

And so on. The little shade lawyer did his best, Koura had to give him that. He managed to get the damages dropped on the basis of cloud furniture, as well as the destruction inflicted upon Gaia designated "outside of divine property lines". There were other things as well, but Koura dozed off when the shade began talking about long-term emotional abuse and temporary insanity.

She was woken up by Glaucus, who elbowed her in the side. "Zeus is about to request the sentence, Koura. And you're drooling on my shoulder."

"I'm up, I'm up. Don't let the bus leave." She rubbed her eyes. Zeus was standing across from Hades and addressing Astraea directly.

"As the chosen representative of the Olympians, I Zeus," Zeus paused for dramatic effect; Hades rolled his eyes. "I, Zeus request, nay! Demand, that my brother be locked up with my father Cronus in the Pit of Tartarus for no less than thousand years."

A low rumble went up from the crowd, and not without a few dissents; Koura shivered and Glaucus sucked air through his teeth, hissing. The Pit with Cronus. Possibly the worst thing you could do to any being. It meant pain, torture, maiming, and listening to Dad's old war stories. And in Hades' case, possibly being swallowed again. Astraea raised an eyebrow. The shade by Hades' side shrugged in a "look at what I had to work with, I did my best," sort of way.  The already grayish Hades lost more of his color. He'd obviously expected leniency, or a last minute save, as in years past. But Zeus was having none of it this time around.

"His repeated actions against his fellow gods are inexcusable. His reordering of the cosmos could have very well destroyed the essential fabric of the universe." Zeus was on a roll, having practiced this speech. Big words and all. "Nowhere, in all the history of the world, has such a heinous crime been committed, and for it's sheer presumption and..."

"Well that's not true," Koura whispered to Glaucus. "It happens all the time."

A gorgon sitting close behind Koura snorted. "It does?"

"Yep," said Koura, still keeping her voice low. "Actually, I've seen worse."

"Did you hear that?" The gorgon turned to her sister. "The little shabby one says this kind of thing happens all the time."

"Really?" The other gorgon looked at her.

"Excuse me, shabby?" Koura glared at them, the blinked and looked away. Immortal or not a gorgon's gaze could still give you nightmares. "Uh...yes. I mean, not around here, not exactly, it's different. But in Egypt something like it happened, and once in Asgard, and a whole bunch of times in India, course there were monkeys involved so it was much more interesting..." Suddenly the row behind her began to talk.

"All the time?"

"Now that I think about it..."

"My cousin in Persia mentioned..."

"Maybe it's not so bad..."

"You know Zeus, he's so dramatic..."

"And such a control freak..."

"Tartarus is awfully harsh..."

Koura scratched her nose. What was the big deal?

Glaucus lowered himself into his seat. "Uh, Koura?" The murmurs spread and rose in volume. Abruptly Zeus stopped talking and squinted at the crowd.

"Oh," said Koura, suddenly realizing. "Oh, oh no."

"What's going on out there?" demanded Astraea, scanning the audience, which was now in the beginnings of an uproar.

One of the harpies began to screech. "Happens all the time!"

"Hide me." moaned Koura.

Glaucus put a hand on her shoulder. "I wish I could. Just stay cool, okay? No one's pointed you out yet."

"The green maiden in the front claims knowledge of similar events!" the north wind Boreas roared in a great cold voice.

The young sea god sank as low as he could and covered his face. "Maybe I should just shut up now."

"What's the deal?" Koura tried to be as small as possible. "So I do. Let's get on with the trial already."

"If what she says is true," boomed Astraea, "Past rulings may shine light on a more appropriate course of action." This last part she directed at Zeus, who was searching the audience for whoever had spoken out against him. So was Hades, entirely confused but suddenly feeling more optimistic. Were his minions up here starting something?

"Bring the maiden forward," Astraea sat forward. "I wish to speak with her."

One of the Horae left Hades' side and began to walk towards Koura's seat, still searching the crowd.

 "She's the one!" screamed a harpy, it's little-used voice screeching. It swooped down from the top of the amphitheater and circled around above Koura's head. "She's what you want!"

"Go. Away." Koura started to feel the anger coming. She took a deep breath. She could handle this.

Then Zeus saw her.

"You!" he thundered, taking a step forward.

"Whoa, hey!" Hades broke in. "Brother, Zeus babe. Calm down. You're acting crazy here. Like a nut or something." He snuck a look at the audience. A lot of them were starting to glance at Zeus sideways. Not exactly plan A, but hey, plan A hadn't exactly panned out. Plan B it was, then. "Come on, big bad. Can't hurt to let a little girl speak."

Koura had been nearly dragged up to the stage by Eunomia. Hades' brain experienced a skip. Who was that? Definitely not the two P's in the neck. No one he recognized from the Underworld, either, or anyone who owed him anything. Not that the lord of the dead could think of anyone who owed him anything.

"Koura!" screeched Demeter, "What are you doing? Are you crazy?"

Koura? Who was Kour...Persepha-whatsis? Hades thoughts clicked back into place. Demeter's exiled kid, the one with the temper and a mouth bigger than her brain. Hel had mentioned her once as good at getting rot stains out of tunics.

"Hey kid, long time no tantrum." Hades called across the stage. "Get tired of mopping up after your betters?"

"I'm paid to be pathetic. What's your excuse?" The audience hissed it's approval. Hades twisted his face up in a snarl, but Koura turned away from him as the Olympian box erupted in shouts.

 "Koura, get down off that stage! You'll ruin everything!" Demeter was in hysterics. Even the unflappable Bacchus seemed agitated. The Olympians were all staring at the maiden like an insect. Ares snorted at her. "Get down from there you stupid girl."

All right, that was it. No getting out of it now. Koura straightened her back and set her jaw.  She was definitely back to being persona-non-grata again for just being up here; might as well go out with a bang.

"I will not," she glared at the Olympians, but mostly at Ares.

"Quite right, she will not." Astraea motioned with her hand. "Come here, little goddess."

Koura had no idea what she was doing, but she walked to stand in front of the Titaness anyways. It took most of her strength to keep her knees from shaking. But they didn't, and she put her arms behind her back and did her best to look calm and collected. It was tough. The judge was studying her carefully, with a great deal of interest.

"Astraea," rumbled Zeus, looking like he was about to let loose with the smiting. "This...maiden...is known far and wide for her lack of respect and vicious tongue."

"I have never heard of her," Astraea replied. "So she can hardly be known far and wide."

"She could be in the employ of him," Zeus thundered, "Get her out of here!"
            "How could I be?" snapped back Koura, a millennia's worth of anger filling her voice. "You kicked me out and told me never to come home, you cloud-brained tyrant!" Zeus's shocked face quickly turned to fury. Demeter howled and hid her face in Bacchus' toga. The crowd erupted into chaos and the amphitheater echoed with the din.

"You poor thing," sympathized Hades, forgoing her cheek and giving her his most caring smile. Which was more like a leer. "He treated you so badly." The crowd began to mutter below the noise it was making.

Astraea banged her hammer against the podium. "I will have ORDER in this court! Zeus, sit down. Hades..." She grit her teeth. "Shut up. Not a word from either of you. And I'll need silence out there." One Titanic warning look and the court went silent.

Koura, feeling the anger abruptly draining away, hid her face in her hands. Why did this keep happening? All she wanted was a nice quiet place to sit somewhere and not be bothered. Preferably without any dirty dishes.

"Koura." said Astraea. "Please, tell us what you said."

"I didn't say anything," protested Koura. "I was just talking." She kept an eye on Zeus, who was now seething by Astraea's podium.

"A failing of hers." muttered Ares.

"Ares, one more word and I'll have you removed." Astraea returned to the spring maiden. "Bear with me, girl."

Koura crossed her arms and gave up. "I just said that this kind of thing happened all the time, or similar ones, and I've seen worse. Well, at least one worse."

Astraea frowned. "Define worse."

"I was in Egypt once, a while back, and this big deity named Osiris was cut into a lot of little pieces by his brother, Set. Then when his wife put him back together again, Set did it again. To get his throne, you see. I worked in her temple and I helped her find some of the bits. It was disgusting. He's an immortal, like us, so all the pieces kept screaming. And we never did find his..."

Astraea cut her off. "And what happened to this Set?"

"Osiris gave him rule over desert, but in exile forever, with some of these elite guards to make sure he stuck to his job and nothing else. I think being cut into pieces falls into the category of 'worse'. It's certainly not any better."

"Interesting." Astraea nodded. "Continue."

"The islands to the east, across the next continent, had a god that tried to overthrow his uncle. He detached his uncle's island from where it was foundered and sank it. The uncle won though, something about a sea serpent."

"And?"

"He sent his brother to live beneath the sea, keeping an eye on him and never letting him set foot on the island again." Koura was on a roll, "And then, you wouldn't believe the infighting in Polynesia. It gets knotty, but..."

And Koura talked, and talked, and then talked some more. She could always tell a good story, ever since her stint as Anansi's cook. She told the judge about the islands, and then about Rama and Ravana of India, Asgard, the rebellions in the deep continent far south of Egypt, and the wide strange lands west of the Isles of the Blessed.

Astraea and the audience seemed fascinated; Zeus couldn't understand it. They were actually listening to this girl? No wonder Hercules had asked him to lift the girl's sentence and allow her to remain on Olympus. She must have tricked the innocent boy somehow, just like she was doing to the judge now.

Hades, for once in his long life, remained silent. He could barely believe his luck; this little piece of fluff was making him look like a common thug. Not exactly classy or his style, he'd admit, but at moment it was exactly what he needed.

"And Quetzalcoatl lost his throne to Tezcatlipoca for a while." Koura finally rolled to a stop. "But I don't know what happened to him. Miclancihuatl wouldn't say."

"I happen to be familiar with that one," Astraea was drumming her fingers on the podium in thought. "And always with that mirror." The judge inclined her head towards Koura. "Thank you dear. You've given me much to think about." She shot a strange look at Hades, then stood up. "Is there anything else that the court needs to hear?"

"Astraea, my lovely judge." Poseidon rose from his seat. "I would like to point out that all the girl has told us is hearsay. Even if all that she tells us is true, these are other gods, other lands. The trial here today involves one of our own, not some primitive, violent divinity across the sea." There were a few assents among the crowd.

"C'mon, a god's a god," broke in Hades, determined not to lose his edge. "Now you're telling me a fish isn't a fish cause it's not from Greece?? Po-po, bro, my man, you can do better than that."

"Didn't you start an earthquake about a year ago?" Koura ignored Hades and her mother, who was making the 'I'm going to cut your head off' gesture with her fingers.

"Uh," Poseidon looked down at her, startled. "Yes, but I'm not sure..."

"It made three cities in the Nile delta fall into the sea. You killed over eight thousand mortals and gave Anubis a real headache. I'm not saying it wasn't a godly thing to do, but you did get involved in another primitive's domain."

"I was pretty busy myself there, Popo. That was a nice one." Hades grinned. Poseidon sat down, looking embarrassed.

"That's enough. You've made your feelings towards us abundantly clear, girl," rumbled Zeus, cracking his knuckles and glaring at her.

"Well obviously not," Koura put her hands on her hips, using up the last shred of her resentment. "You should know I'm not scared of you, Zeus. The only thing you make me get is a headache, so knock it off with the big brass olives bit."

"Why you little..." Zeus reached out a hand.

"Zeus!" howled Demeter. "Don't you dare!"

"I must agree, Zeus." Athena shook her head. "This girl is not what the bloody trial is about. Calm down."

"Yes, enough." Astraea's eyes flashed in anger. Zeus stopped, and then took a step back. But the look on his face was deadly. The judge watched him for a moment, then down at the girl. "Koura, please take you seat."

"Yes ma'm." She turned and walked towards Glaucus, passing Hades on the way.

"Nice job, kid." Hades muttered as she came near. "Way to play to sympathy card."

"Don't hold your breath, sparky, you're not out of here yet." She made it to her seat and sat down. "But I sure am." And I'd better haul it too, if I want to beat Big Boy's thunderbolts, thought Koura. So much for Bacchus' plan.

"You were good up there," said Glaucus. "I'm not sure you were on the right side, but it sounded good."

"I just told her what she asked." Koura rested her head on the back of her seat. "My involvement ends here."

"I will now retire to dwell upon what has been said." Astraea looked around at the audience, Hades, Zeus and the Olympians. "There will be no infighting in my absence." Astraea snapped her fingers, and three harpies descended from the ceiling and alit on the podium. "I will return." She disappeared silently in a swirl of blue.

The entire amphitheater began to talk. Bleats, roars, chatters and shouts filled the hall. Zeus looked at the harpies, then at Koura. He grunted, and then leaned up against a cloud pillar. It wasn't like she'd be able to make it out of Greece before he could get to her. First Hades, then the girl. He was almost looking forward to getting in some target practice.

Hades studied the crowd. Most of the seemed to be shrugging and shaking their heads. It was hard to tell what was going to happen; Astraea hadn't given any indicators either. But the shade had gotten him out of the minor stuff, and the kid had come out of left field with a nice piece of yakking. Zeus's little speech about Tartarus had really raised his blood pressure. But this might turn out all right after all. Hades snapped out of his thoughts as Demeter broke loose of Bacchus's grip and stormed up to the front row of seats.

"Are you crazy? What did you think you were doing? Whose side are you on and why would you do that I can't think..." And so on and so forth. The girl just sat there and took it. Man. Hades wished he had a pair of earplugs. It was obvious who the kid had gotten her lungs from. If he'd cared a whit he'd have felt sorry for her.

Koura, for her part, was remembering with a great deal of clarity why she'd spent a millennia wandering the earth. It was because Olympus was loud, angry, and hated her. Missed it, she did all the time. It was home. But that didn't mean you belonged there.

"Mother," Koura started.

"...one single day! One day to be quiet to not say anything but could you..."

"Mother."

"...India and Egypt and who knows where else why it matters I don't know why you should even care..."

"MOTHER!"

"What!?"

Koura pointed. "Astraea's back."

Demeter whirled around. The judge was sitting at the podium once again, regarding Demeter with a stern gaze. Demeter huffed a little, cast a I'll deal with you later young lady look at Koura, then stomped off to the podium box.

"Now that you've all had your say," Astraea took her seat. "I've conferred with those in the Firmament and come to a decision based on this," She waved her hand, "And other evidence which has come to my attention elsewhere." Koura saw that there was a raven sitting on Astraea's shoulder, quietly cleaning his feathers.

Huginn? Koura shook her head. Nah, couldn't be.

Astraea laced her fingers together and turned to Hades. "You will return to your domain beneath the earth and continue to carry out the required duties there. We cannot have the dead go undealt with, and of all the individuals qualified for the position, you, amazingly enough, are the least repugnant." Hades grinned. Oh yeah. Everything was coming up asphodel.

Then judge came to the second part. "But you are not to set foot on Olympus or the realm of the living under any condition. This includes beseechments, festivals, or any other event that might have required your presence. You are confined to the underworld, Lord Hades. And you will be monitored closely to make sure you adhere to the Firmament's decree. Do I make myself clear?"
            "Astraea," began Zeus, but she put a hand up to stop him.

"Do you understand, Lord Hades?"

"Every word, Miss A. Can I call you Miss A? Thanks. And I love the outfit, by the way, really suits you. But I have just one little teensy tiny bitty question..."

"I'm getting to that. Since there are times when an Underworld presence is needed among the mortals, such as those of them looking for assistance in desperate matters, or attending to them at the Necromanteion, you will be assigned an Olympian representative. This representative will carry out your duties among the mortals as well as those on Mount Olympus. They will also monitor your actions in the Underworld and deliver a regular report to your associates."

"You're giving me a parole officer?!" Hades flared in indignation.

"Not exactly as painful as what I had in mind," Zeus rubbed his beard. "But not unreasonable." The other Olympians nodded. Hades under lock and key sounded good; there wasn't much he could do confined to the Underworld—especially by order of the Firmament. And they wouldn't have to bother with finding someone new to run the dreary place. Athena stood. "Which one of us here is going to have to take the job?"

Astraea laughed. "Oh, none of you bunch. You all have your own dominions to worry about." The raven ruffled his feathers and began to murmur in Astraea's ear. She nodded. "Quite right. Only one of them that will work." All of the Olympians looked at each other in confusion.

Glaucus suddenly began to flip his tail in agitation. "Oh. Oh my Zeus."

"What?" Koura was still sulking.

"You wouldn't happen to have a helm of invisibility on you?"

"No. I don't have any fish sticks either. Why?"

"Because I think your involvement in this is just beginning."

"Huh?" Koura looked up.

"Little goddess," Astraea beckoned. "Please come up here."

Bacchus saw what was coming before Demeter did. He therefore made sure his grip on her arm was very, very tight.

"Uh," Koura got up. "Astraea, your honor, I think that maybe..."

"Her?!" The choice hit Hades and he burst into red flame. "That yachneh telling me what to do? Sister, you've got another thing coming if you think..."

"Silence," barked Astraea. "You no longer have your freedom, Lord Hades. Be thankful you haven't had any more taken from you."

"No! You can't!" shouted Demeter. "I won't allow it!"

"And what exactly do you plan to about it, Demeter?" Astraea rested her hand on her chin. "Koura is the only Grecian goddess without a current purpose assigned to her. She will be on Olympus regularly. She will no longer wander the earth. She will not be purposeless any longer, and I'm certain Lord Hades will make sure," The judge looked sternly at the prisoner, "That nothing untoward will happen to her, nor will he interfere with her duties in any way. Or else I and others in the Firmament will be very put out." Hades simply smoldered in reply.

"Well," Demeter hesitated. She didn't want to argue with the Firmament—confrontation was not in her nature. And Koura would be nearby. Better her in a terrible place nearby than an equally terrible place across the oceans. And it wasn't like she was marrying the evil god or anything. "I suppose..."

"Excuse me," Koura's voice sounded tiny in her ears. "Don't I get a say?"

Astraea looked down on her. "Then what say you?"

Koura paused, then snuck a glance at Zeus. He didn't look particularly angry, just grimly thoughtful. The girl thought about Serqet, the goddess with scorpions for hair. If Koura declined, it was back to braiding it every morning, then sweeping the palace, carrying water and cleaning up after Anubis. She'd had enough entrails to last her an immortals' lifetime. And the look on Astraea's face said that the offer of a choice was simply an act of politeness.

"All right." Koura felt tired and beaten. "I'll do it." She'd done worse for less. And at the very least, it would be interesting.

Astraea nodded. "You begin tomorrow. Have Hermes drop you off at the gates."

Hades laughed, bitterly. "Fine, have it your way. I give the kid a week." And if the general nastiness of the Underworld wasn't enough, there was no better sport than passive provocation. He shrugged, and then addressed the Horae. "Ladies? Walk me to my wheels?"

"Get him out of here. Make sure he goes back to the Underworld immediately." Astraea waved.

The Horae led Hades out. "Hey, chickenwings, can we do something about these chains? They're really cramping the whole fear-inspiring god of darkness thing I'm going for..."

"This is going to be tough and irritating, isn't it?" asked Koura wearily.
            Astraea favored her with a small smile. "Most likely. But I've been informed you're the only one that'll do."

"By who?"
            "That's not important. Zeus, Olympians," Astraea stood. "I trust you have no complaints?"

Zeus studied the green-eyed maiden. Hmm. The two beings he could stand the least sent to the Underworld by the highest authority in the universe, one of them having to report to him under penalty. And it'd get Hercules and Hera off his back.

"I'm good," Zeus replied agreeably.

"Very well," Astraea gathered up her robes. "I call this trial to end. Please file out in an orderly fashion." The bird on Astraea's took to the air as the Titaness disappeared. It circled around her head for a moment, then flapped off and began to head north.

"Remind me to send a lovely thank you to Odin." She sighed.

"Dear," Demeter came, dragging Bacchus with her. "I'm so sorry."

"It's all right, mother." Koura patted her mother on the arm. Demeter swept her up in a bear hug and commenced crushing her daughter's ribs.

"It's just I get all nervous thinking about you down there in that dark pit with all those foul creatures." Demeter wiped a bit of moisture from her eye.

Bacchus chuckled deeply. "You'll be fine, sweetness. You've had worse." He punched her playfully in the shoulder. "We'll turn our celebration into a send-off party."

"I've had worse." Koura agreed, struggling to breathe. Worse, but not the same. A permanent position somewhere sounded strange. And it had the added plus of being jailer to a highly combustible divinity. She'd have to fireproof all her socks.

"Well now," Zeus had ambled over. "Looks like you've finally found yourself something useful to do."

"Yes," Koura said carefully. "I'm sure Astraea knows she's doing." And probably a bit more than that. Koura put her suspicion (and the thought that something else besides the trial had gone on here today) unto a shelf at the back of her mind for later examination.

Zeus grunted. "Have a good time down there."

"I won't be there to have a good time."

"That's enough chatting, Koura. Come along." Demeter said, nervously eyeing Zeus. "We can find you some nice things to make you more comfortable down in that awful hole."

"I need to return that chariot," Koura said, reluctantly letting herself be led by the arm.

"Hey hey," Hermes descended towards them, hovering above her head. "You're an employee of Mount Olympus, Inc. Tell her to come get it."

Koura blinked. Well, maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. "Would you take a letter to her for me?"

"Babe, I was born to make you happy."

Not bad at all.