Disclaimer: Snape sadly belongs to JK Rowling. If she wants to give him up, I would be happy to take him in. *grins* I take no credit in what I write, except for my story plot and the reviews I get. Everything else belong to the people who have properly claimed them.

Dedicated to: Snape, who else?

THE MANY PERSONALITIES OF PROFESSOR SEVERUS SNAPE

Chapter 1

When he smirks:

~ He's pleased, been proven right

~ He knows he's right

~ Amused

~ Content

~ Has something planned

You are subject to:

~ Do nothing, he's harmless and probably won't get blasted to pieces if you ask for help on that potions project you need help on.

When he scowls:

~ He's angry

~ He's pissed

~ He's just been hugged

~ He's been proven wrong

~ He's disappointed

~ He's aggravated

~ He needs a drink

You are subject to:

~ Get out of sight quickly. Or you might be helping him drain leeches and dissect rats.

When he growls:

~ He's angry

~ He's pissed

~ He's been agitated

~ He needs a drink

You are subject to:

~ You are at risk for being tied, upside down from his office ceiling and spun about until your limbs fly off, no exception to Slytherins or favorite students.

When he smiles:

~ He is intoxicated

~ Made Gabby have an eye twitch

~ Wants to be scary

~ Has been made extremely happy

You are subject to:

~ Be afraid, be very afraid.

~ Have heart attacks

~ Nightmares

~ Twitches,

~ Rumor has it you'll be turned to stone if caught in the line of fire.

When he cries:

~ He's a baby

~ He's a woman ((damn that estrogen!))

~ He's out of liquor

~ Needs a drink

You are subject to:

~ Get drunk with him and be sure to keep up.

~ Patting his back until he stops crying

~ Give him a bottle

When he screams:

~ He's overwhelmed

~ Has just had another prank played on him by Gabby or Draco

~ Needs a drink

You are subject to:

~ In danger of getting turned into a flea…a harmless little flea…((you can finish the rest)).

When he glares:

~ He's annoyed

~ Has his hands on his wand, soon to be pointed at you if you go further

~ He's angry

~ Knows your up to something

~ Knows your lying

~ Needs a drink

You are subject to:

~ Duck and cover.