Hey again everyone! Thanks for all the reviews, they make me feel all warm and fuzzy! Well not actually, but close. So thanks to SandsO, Red Witch, Anon, todd fan, harrys-angel14, The Scribe, Cammy, me, Neva, RyanGosling4Ever, aMaZinG-GraCe.
Thanks for all the suggestions for character castings, but unfortunately I had already decided all the characters, hope you don't mind them. They're mostly quite predictable, except for some of them. And sorry but none of the new mutants are involved in this story.
Note: I forgot to mention in my last chapter that the people in my story range from slightly OOC to hopelessly OOC depending on my mood. Also fiReyLighT (aka Meli) kindly told me that Logan keeps his beer in the garage, but for my convenience, lets just pretend that the beer is where all normal humans keep their beer, in the fridge in the kitchen.
Disclaimer: X-Men Evo belongs to Marvel, Harry Potter to JK Rowling.
**Chapter 2 - Casting of Characters**
"WHAT?" Scott shouted, as Jean fell off the couch in shock.
"Cool," Kitty said, while Rogue merely smiled and shook her head.
"Breathe, dude, breathe," Kurt instructed Evan, who was gasping and looking like he had an apple stuck in his throat.
"Me. Pietro. Harry..." Evan choked out.
"Potter," Kurt ended. "Go on. You just have to expel all the bad thoughts to achieve inner peace."
"You sound like a therapist," remarked Kitty, and Kurt smiled broadly.
"I heard they make a lot of money," he said, before turning his attention back to Evan caught-in-the-thralls-of-epilepsy Daniels. "Yes, don't bottle everything up. Speak it out! That is the only way to get in touch with your inner soul. Tell me about how you're going to have to act in a play with Pietro Maximoff, and he's going to terrorise you from start to end, and-"
Apparently the mental image was too much for Evan, because he suddenly turned an unbecoming shade of purple and keeled over in a dead faint.
"Hey, man!" cried Kurt in consternation. "When I said get in touch with your inner soul, I didn't mean you had to send it to heaven!"
He teleported away and back with a pail of water, which he proceeded to splash liberally on Evan's face. Evan coughed and spluttered a few times before he managed to convince Kurt that he was indeed awake, no he was not sleepwalking, and though he would like Kurt to have his fun, please not to take it out on him.
"Aww," Kurt sighed, removing the pail to a corner of the room.
Seeing that everyone was now suitably restored, Scott decided to attack Logan. Figuratively. "Logan, what do you mean? We can't really be acting with the Brotherhood, can we?"
"Yeah!" Jean interjected. "I mean, there're a band of unruly untameable children." She said this as if it was the worst thing a human could say to a fellow earth-dweller.
"Its unfair to lay this kind of trauma on us!" Evan added, as he began having respiratory problems again.
Logan glared at them. "You bunch of selfish brats!" he snapped. "Is this what we've trained you to be? How can you only think of yourselves! Why don't you think about what the effect of this whole thing is for the others! Like me!"
Evan stopped gasping long enough to roll his eyes.
"Wait, Logan," Scott said patiently, making a superhuman attempt to calm down...and failing. "Are we really working with the Brotherhood? Why, What, Who, When, Where, How, Who-hey wait haven't I said that already?"
"You have," Kitty informed him.
"Thanks. But really, you are joking aren't you? How can we be working with those...those..."
"Brothers?" Kurt suggested.
"Yes! Brothers! Hey! That's not what I meant to say..." Scott paused, looking confused.
Logan groaned and dropped himself into a chair, which emitted a loud creak too.
"The chair shares your sentiment," Rogue remarked in a rare show of unwanted amusement. Logan shot a look at her.
"According to Chuck's - er, my speech, Chuck mentioned his dilemma of lack of actors to Mystique-"
"They're still talking to each other?" Kitty interjected in disbelief.
"- and she offered to get her boys to help. Something about wanting to do her bit for the community. Sounds to me like she desperately needs some soul-cleansing. I wonder why," he added darkly.
The rest of the X-Men nodded solemnly, looking as if they fully understood why.
"Anyway," Logan continued, flipping a few pages of his script. Chuck had told him if he continued with a nice even pace (i.e. "thisisaniceevenpace") with no interruptions or pauses for breath, it should take less than two hours to read the whole speech. He considered he was doing quite well, having covered ten pages in less than two minutes.
"Professor Xavier blah blah blah, great fun for you, blah blah blah, still be training sessions ("aww!"), oh here we are. The smart, dashing, kind, generous and funny Professor Xavier has instructed that stupid, stubborn, savage and unstable I-"
"Something tells me he didn't write that speech himself," Kurt muttered.
"- guide you to your quest? Oh querulous-"
"Yep, he didn't," Kurt amended.
"- journey to put up a play for the folks of Bayville. Hmm reminds me of some book or other I read."
"You read a book? A whole book?" Jean exclaimed in astonishment from where she was still seated on the floor.
"The synopsis on the book cover. Doesn't that count?"
"Ah. No matter. Proceed." Jean waved her hand dismissively.
Logan gave her a strange look, then continued reading from his - the script. "After observing all of you for a long time, Professor Xav-heck, Chuck, Storm, and I have determined the best roles for you and the Brotherhood."
Everyone looked at him expectantly.
"The characters are as follows. Harry Potter will be played by Scott Summers."
Scott looked pleased and slightly embarrassed as Kurt and Evan thumped him on the back.
"Ron Weasley will be played by Kurt Wagner."
Kurt looked extremely astonished, but rather joyful as he too enjoyed an honorary round of back-thumping.
"Hermione Granger will be played by Kitty Pryde."
Nobody saw Jean's look of tragic disappointment as they congratulated Kitty. Kurt looked positively ecstatic.
"What about Jean?" Kitty asked, voicing everyone's hidden thoughts.
"She can be Ginny," Rogue said, with a nasty smile. "Remember, Ron's red-haired little squirt of a sister who had a crush on Harry?"
Jean looked furious, while Scott appeared to be pondering whether this scenario could possibly parallel reality. He hoped it did.
"Er, well, she's McGonagall," Logan said, checking the paper in his hands.
"Yeah!" enthused Kurt, his momentary fear that Jean would replace Kitty as Hermione dispelled. "Jean's just perfect for McGonagall! She's..." he paused, the words, "bossy, prim, and snooty" on the tip of his tongue. "...good," Kurt finished lamely.
Jean looked venomous.
"To carry on, Albus Dumbledore will be played by Professor-CHUCK!?" Logan looked furiously at the ceiling. "THIS PLAY IS JUST A PLOY TO GET YOU INTO THE LIMELIGHT ISN'T IT?" he yelled.
"Calm down, Logan," Scott said in some alarm.
"Yeah," Kurt interposed. "Need some water?" he indicated the pail at the corner of the wall, and Logan looked a bit unnerved at the greedy look on Kurt's face.
Scott frowned at Kurt, then turned back to Logan. "Why don't you just go back to reading out the roles?" he said soothingly.
"Alright," Logan said. "BUT I SHALL COME TO LOOK FOR YOU ONCE THIS IS OVER!" he shouted at the ceiling again. "As you know, Minerva McGonagall is played by Jean Grey."
Jean responded by glowering at everyone.
"Fred and George...ja-"
"Learning German?" inquired Kurt in interest.
"No!" Logan looked displeased at being thought to be learning something. To him, everything was instinct! Instinct! And instinct was telling him right now he didn't like the look on Kurt's face. He hoped Kurt wasn't planning a one-on-one German tutoring session.
"As I was just saying, Fred and Georgia are played by Evan Daniels and Rogue."
Evan and Rogue looked at each other in askance, while everyone else roared. Except Jean of course, who still looked sulky.
"Do you have the idea the Professor had little choice to choose from?" Rogue asked.
"Paternal twins?" offered Evan.
Logan coughed. "Hagrid will be played by -eh. Fred Dukes."
There was a moment of silence.
"Well, it does make sense," remarked Evan finally, but everyone still looked faintly repulsed by the idea that their favourite giant was being acted by a generally disliked blob.
"Severus Snape will be played by Lance Alvers."
"Lance's hair isn't that greasy," Kitty grumbled.
Logan raised an eyebrow at her. "Draco Malfoy will be played by Pietro Maximoff."
"He should be Quirrell...Voldemort," Evan said with fervour.
"Ah, yes. Quirrell will be played by - gah. Todd Tolensky."
Everyone burst into uproarious laughter.
"Todd, that little pipsqueak, to be the master baddie?" Evan guffawed.
"Hmm, yeah. Ask Chuck. Oh wait." Logan scanned the paper. "The judge's decision is final. Other assorted minor characters will be played by actors who are not involved in the particular scene."
He checked the wall clock. Hmm, not bad, he thought. Only about ten minutes. He had exceeded Chuck's expectations by...by...he decided it wasn't worth calculating, not because he actually couldn't divide the numbers. It was a lot, anyway. This called for a reward. Not including the fact that he hadn't throttled Chuck for putting him in charge of a mob of hyperactive kids and making himself one of the star actors. Make that a double reward, Logan thought as he headed for the kitchen.
"Mystique will tell the Brotherhood their roles and all the other stuff I just told you. We'll be having our first rehearsal here. The scripts will be given out then," he called over his shoulder.
"Hey, Logan!" Kurt shouted after him. "When is the first rehearsal?"
"Good point," Logan muttered, checking through the wad of papers. "Uh...lets see...your first rehearsal is...er...right now," Logan finished in horror, his eyes flitting towards the fridge just visible beyond the kitchen door, wherein awaited his sweet, sweet, beer.
As if on cue, the doorbell rang.
~tbc~
Next chapter: Meeting the Mob. The Brotherhood arrive for their first rehearsal, someone sings, people are given Evil Eyes, and will Logan get to drink his beer?
I must apologise that this chapter is a bit jerky at bits and isn't really funny. Don't worry, it gets funnier during the rehearsals. So anyway, please review!
& fLiTwIcKe