1. Cinderharry
Halfway through his last year at Hogwarts Harry Potter defeated Lord Voldemort – it involved a freak bolt of lightning and a conveniently placed cauldron of one of Snape's most horrid potions – and everybody else was living happily ever after.
Harry however, wasn't so happy. If he'd thought the hysteria around being the Boy-Who-Lived was bad, being the Hot-Young-Man-Who-Offed-Voldemort-Permanently was a nightmare. Now that the threat to his life and those around him was finally gone, all he wanted was to live the rest of his life peacefully and undisturbed with someone who would love him for Harry, and not for the scar or his quidditch skills or his amazing push-the-nasty-wizard-in-the-cauldron-of-bubbling-goo technique. But how was he to find somebody like that with the entire wizarding world fawning over him? He was getting worried he might go blind from all the snap photographs people were taking (and then selling to Witch's Weekly and about every other blasted magazine).
So as the NEWTS came closer, and seeing the depressed funk their friend and fellow Gryffindor was sinking into, the Gryffindor guys decided they'd help Harry find his true love, his soul-mate, the person who would love Harry for Harry. Being wizards they figured the best and only way to go about this would be magic. Being guys and not wanting to let the girls find out about their mushy romantic plan they decided not to ask Hermione for help. And being the type of people Harry had been surrounded with all his life – i.e. people who thought they knew what was in his best interest – they declined to tell Harry about their plan. Instead they would cast the spell after their final NEWT as a pleasant surprise.
~~ HP ~~ LM ~~
Ron, Seamus, Dean, Neville and Colin were hiding in the broom shed waiting for Harry to return from his last flight on the Quidditch pitch. It was dark and they were hiding in the shadows nervously. They'd spent the past few weeks poring over books in the library – Hermione had been impressed and proud, thinking they'd been studying for their exams – and then preparing the potion required for the spell they'd chosen.
"Are you guys sure this is a good idea?" Neville whispered nervously, "I mean, what if we got something wrong? What if the spell -"
"Of course this is a good idea! We researched the spell, it's perfect! And we got the potion right; too bad we couldn't have done that one for our NEWTS, even bloody Snape wouldn't have found anything wrong with it!" Ron said.
The potion had been the tricky part, the spell itself was rather simple and easy to memorize. They'd had to steal some ingredients from the student supplies, the ones they hadn't been able to get in Hogsmeade. Harry had lent Ron his invisibility cloak for that, under the mistaken impression it was needed to help prepare for a prank they'd said they were going to pull on Snape end of term.
Ron had slipped the potion into Harry's drink at breakfast that morning, and it was nearly six hours later now. Their window of opportunity was closing, what was Harry doing that took him so long?! It wasn't as if he was never going to play quidditch again, the offers from professional quidditch teams had literally been flying in the past few weeks.
"Yeah. And just think of how happy and grateful Harry will be," said Colin. Colin Creevey had never really grown out of his hero-worship of Harry, and had enthusiastically joined the older boys in their plans. Even if Harry's true love turned out to be someone other than him, having Harry happy would be worth it. In the meantime he kept his fingers crossed and his camera ready.
"How will we know if it works?" Seamus joined in.
The spell they'd found in the restricted section had been pretty cryptic, saying only something about 'true love awakening' and that kind of stuff.
"Shhh!" Dean hissed.
They could hear Harry approaching over the gravel. As one the five boys drew their wands and backed into the shadows of the shed, ready to surprise Harry. No time for second thoughts or further doubts.
The door opened and Harry walked in, already smoothing out the bristles of his broom. He kicked the door shut behind him and then looked up, only now noticing the five boys.
"Oh hi guys. Um." He frowned at the five wands pointed at him and his right hand surreptiously started moving towards his own wand in his pocket. "What are you doing?"
Before he could reach his wand however, or voice any more questions, the boys chanted the spell.
"Somnus! Amor Excitat! Solus Amor Excitat Somnus!"
A soft white glow surrounded Harry, lit up brightly and then faded. The five Gryffindors watched Harry expectantly. Harry blinked once, and then yawned as he rested his broom against the wall and stretched himself to his full height. Then he carefully lay down on the ground, curled up on his side, closed his eyes, sighed, and was fast asleep.
Whatever his five housemates had been expecting as the spell's result, this was not it.
It was silent in the broom shed for a moment, except for Harry's soft calm breathing and the nervous shuffle of the five boys.
"Um," Neville said, "was that supposed to happen?"
"Harry? Harry?" Ron said and they all cautiously crept closer to the sleeping figure on the floor. There was no reaction. Hesitantly Ron reached out and carefully touched Harry's shoulder, but still there was no reaction.
"Harry? Are you alright?" he gently shook the sleeping boy, but again no reaction.
"Harry, wake up!" this time Dean shook their classmate a little more forcefully, "wake up, this isn't funny!"
As Harry continued to show no signs of waking the five Gryffindors started getting more anxious. But no matter how hard they shook Harry or called his name, Harry slept soundly on.
"Oh Merlin, what have we done?" Colin started murmuring to himself.
"I knew this was a stupid idea from the start, look at what's happened!" Neville cried out.
"It's all your fault, you picked the spell," Seamus accused Ron.
"We all picked the spell! How was I supposed to know this would happen?" Ron exclaimed. "There must have been something wrong with the potion!"
"The potion was bloody perfect! And we didn't force you to join us, Neville! You were just as enthusiastic as the rest of us!" Dean started shouting.
"What have I done? What have I done?" Colin was rocking back and forth, staring at the sleeping Harry in horror. "Oh Merlin, what have I done?"
"Calm down! We have to calm down! Think logically! We won't get anywhere if we start blaming each other! Now, think!" Ron shouted and they all fell silent, except for Colin who was still in shock. They desperately tried to think of a way to get themselves out of this mess.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Seamus cursed under his breath.
"Fuck," Dean agreed.
"Oh shut up!" Ron exclaimed. "Think! Okay, we cast a spell to find Harry's true love. Harry's fallen asleep. Okay, how do we wake Harry up? For fuck's sake, what does sleeping have to do with finding someone's soul mate?!" Ron's voice rose in pitch and he wailed the last.
"Calm down," Neville grabbed Ron's arms. "I think we need to get help."
"Help? Do you know the fucking trouble we'll get into for casting that spell? McGonagall's going to be livid. Oh fuck, we could get expelled; they may not let us pass our NEWTS! Fuck!" Seamus was pacing the room by now and nearly pulling out his hair.
"Neville's right," Ron said, "we can't leave Harry like this! I'll go get Hermione, I'm sure she can help." Suddenly relieved by the prospect of getting Hermione, who was so smart and would surely know how to wake Harry up, Ron nearly ran to the door. "You guys keep on trying to wake him up, I'll go get Hermione." He slammed the door shut behind him and they could hear his hasty footsteps on the gravel outside.
Nervously Neville, Seamus and Dean glanced at each other and then fell to their knees and started shaking Harry again, calling his name. Colin had crept back against one of the walls and was still muttering his horror as he rocked back and forth.
~~ HP ~~ LM ~~
Half an hour later Hermione was reading through the spell they'd cast, while four boys watched her with desperate hope. Colin had been petrified to finally shut him up.
"I can't believe how irresponsible you are. Casting a dangerous spell you only half understand!"
"We know, we're sorry! But do you know what we did wrong? How do we wake Harry up?"
"Hush! I'm reading."
Nervous silence filled the sheet once again, Hermione still muttering under her breath.
"Aha!"
"What?"
She looked up at them gravely.
"You idiots! It should be impossible, but you actually cast the spell correctly. Harry's supposed to be asleep. This spell, it's a version of the Sleeping Beauty hex."
They looked at her with blank expressions on their faces.
"Sleeping Beauty. Haven't you ever heard of the fairytale? Oh, never mind! The only thing that will wake Harry up is a kiss by his true love, his soul mate."
"Um. Okay. That kinda makes sense," Ron hedged. "How do we find Harry's soul mate?"
Hermione glared at the five boys.
"The spell doesn't say."
"So what do we do now?" Neville asked.
Hermione rolled her eyes, exasperated, and walked over to where Harry was lying.
"Isn't it obvious? We have to kiss Harry and hope that one of us is his soul mate."
The boys started protesting.
"Would you rather go to Dumbledore right now? Because that's what we're going to have to do if it's not one of us."
That shut them up and Hermione knelt next to Harry.
"Hey, why do you have to go first?" Ron grabbed her arm.
"Why not?"
"But… but you're my girlfriend!" he protested.
"Oh, get over it. If it doesn't work for me, you're kissing him next, Ron Weasley."
And Hermione shook her arm free and then gently pressed her lips to her friend's. Out of everybody's view she had her fingers crossed, Ron didn't need to know she'd always kinda fancied Harry, and whatever her relationship with Ron, Harry wasn't Witch Weekly's most eligible bachelor for nothing.
Harry's lips were soft against hers, and she could feel him breathing, but nothing else happened.
"Well?" Ron interrupted impatiently, not liking how long his girlfriend was taking to snog his best friend. Not to mention the fact that it was his turn next. Hermione didn't need to know that not every time he woke up with a stiffie was because he was dreaming about his girlfriend.
Hermione sighed and stood up again.
"Nothing. Ah well, your turn."
"I'll go next," Seamus pushed past Ron.
"Hey wait! It's my turn." Ron protested.
"No, I'll go next," Dean tried to beat Seamus to the sleeping boy.
In the corner the petrified Colin desperately tried to get their attention by positively radiating his desire to give it a try himself.
"Ahem," Hermione raised an eyebrow and looked at them sternly. They at least had the decency to blush and avert their eyes.
But even after they'd all had a go at waking Harry - in Colin's case they'd had to drag him off Harry to get him to stop - he was still fast asleep.
"Fuck," Seamus swore.
"Fuck," Neville, Ron and Dean agreed.
"What have I done?" Colin wailed.
"Well. There's nothing else for it. We're going to have to tell Dumbledore," said Hermione.
"Tell Dumbledore what?"
"The six Gryffindors looked up to find Draco Malfoy standing in the doorway, flanked by the hulking figures of Crabbe and Goyle.
"Ooh, has Potty finally succumbed to the stress? What's going on here?"
"None of your business, Malfoy, so scram!" Ron, Seamus and Dean stepped forward menacingly, putting themselves between the three Slytherins and Harry.
"No, Ron, wait!" Hermione interjected.
The Gryffindor boys started at her for a moment and then it dawned.
"No, you can't be serious, not Malfoy?"
"Well," even Hermione looked doubtful, "you know what they say about opposites attract?"
"Yes, but …. but …. Malfoy?"
"Or Crabbe??"
"Or Goyle???"
"What is going on here," Draco interrupted impatiently, "what did you do to Potter?"
Hermione pushed the boys aside and crossed her arms before speaking in a matter of fact tone of voice.
"They cast a sleeping beauty hex on Harry," she glared at the five Gryffindor boys again, "so now Harry can only be woken by a kiss from his true love, his soul mate. We've all tried but as you can see he's still asleep, so maybe you can give it a go."
Draco's sneer became positively gleeful.
"You hexed Potter! Oh this is just too good. And now you have to get people to snog him to wake him up. This is brilliant! I wish I'd thought of this. Well done, guys, with friends like you …."
"Oh shut up, and just kiss him already!" Neville burst out effectively silencing them all, including himself, from shock.
"Kiss Potter? Hmm, I don't know …."
"That's it! Come on, let's just take him to Dumbledore and get this over with. Dumbledore will be able to sort out this mess."
"Not so hasty, Weasel," Draco grabbed Ron's wand arm to stop him from levitating Harry. "I'll do it. Let me show you how a Malfoy kisses."
With looks of great distaste the Gryffindors reluctantly backed out of the way to let Malfoy near Harry. Smirking, he knelt next to the sleeping young man and the Gryffindors held their breath, unsure whether they should hope Draco would be successful or not.
Draco pressed his lips to Harry's, licked them, and fluttered his tongue against them. For a moment it seemed Harry would wake up, he sighed and his eyelashes seemed to move, but then he went on sleeping as if nothing had happened.
"Fuck," Neville swore.
"Fuck," Gryffindors and Slytherins alike agreed.
"What have I done?" Colin wailed.
~~ HP ~~ LM ~~
While there may have been some ambivalence towards Draco's chances at waking Harry, there was no doubt about the relief that neither Crabbe nor Goyle had been successful. Having no other choice the Gryffindors levitated Harry and went to get the Headmaster's help.
And so now Harry was lying on a table in the Great Hall while, with varying degrees of discretion, everyone at Hogwarts tried their luck at giving the Boy-Who-Lived the kiss of life. Ginny Weasley had broken down into tears when there wasn't the slightest reaction to her kiss. Colin was so upset about the situation he'd been sedated and was on suicide watch in the infirmary to stop him from doing something stupid. It was now Saturday night and Harry was still sleeping.
Professor Snape prowled the corridors and made his way to the Great Hall. He hadn't tried waking the Gryffindor golden boy. Yet. He certainly wasn't planning to do it in front of other people.
Again Snape cursed those meddlesome Gryffindors. He didn't have much hope for being Harry's soul mate, but he was pretty sure they could've at least had a steamy affair for a couple of months over the summer while Harry stayed at Hogwarts. Damnit, he'd been sure the boy had been just a tad too eager to get detentions in Potions class once Snape had started supervising Harry's. Ah well, at least he was going to get one good snog out of this whole mess.
He strode through the doors of the Great Hall, but what he saw there made him stop dead in his tracks and reach for his wand.
"What," he demanded using his most threatening sneer, "the hell do you think you're doing here?"
Rita Skeeter jumped quickly away from the sleeping Potter she'd just been kissing, and surreptiously groping.
"Ah, professor Snape, a sleeping beauty hex, isn't it?"
"How did you get in here?" Snape hissed while gliding toward her, raising his wand.
She nervously glanced from side to side and started to try and get around him towards the doors.
"I don't think so," Snape nearly purred and he pointed his wand at her. "Petrificus Totalis!"
But the reporter was too quick; she jumped out of the way and then transfigured herself into her animagus form. The beetle scuttled away between the cracks in the wall before Snape could crush it under his boot.
Snape cursed. By tomorrow the entire wizarding world would know that Harry Potter had been hexed and there'd be lines all the way to Hogsmeade of people coming to kiss the Boy-Who-Lived.
Grinding his teeth Snape strode to the large fireplace against the wall and threw some powder in it while he called the Headmaster. Dumbledore's head appeared in the fireplace.
"Ah, Severus, what can I do for you, dear boy?'
Snape explained the situation and the Headmaster nodded curtly.
"Very well, I'll be down there in a moment. You keep an eye on our young Mr. Potter so there's no repeat."
Snape sighed and looked back at the sleeping Harry. He may as well give it a try now before they put a permanent guard on the boy. Why they hadn't in the first place was beyond Severus and he didn't think it likely that there was anybody in Hogwarts left who hadn't given it a try. Or two. There'd been a fight earlier on that day between young Mr. Malfoy and Potter's Gryffindor friends. Apparently Draco had tried to kiss Potter again, since there had been some kind of response the first time he'd done so. He'd enjoyed taking points from the Gryffindors for that, and they'd quietened down pretty soon when he threatened to use veritaserum on them to test the veracity of Draco's accusation that he wasn't the only one to go for a second grope.
Severus looked down on the Potter boy. No, young man. He was definitely a young man now. Well, here goes nothing.
"Get your greasy paws off my godson this moment!"
Severus sighed, his lips hovering just a few inches above Harry's. Black. Typical. Always there where you didn't want him. Schooling his face into his most menacing sneer Snape straightened up and turned around to glare at the intruders.
Sirius strode toward him with his wand raised; behind him were Lupin and Dumbledore.
"Afraid your godson and I might just be the perfect match, Black?" he sneered pulling his black robes around himself, "or jealous? You were here awfully quick to give it a try yourself," Severus smirked.
"Now, now, children, let's calm down. Sirius put your wand away. Severus was just trying to help wake young Harry here."
"This is insufferable! There must be some other way to find Harry's soul mate, other than let every greasy git grope my godson. With that Skeeter woman out there they'll be lining up by lunch tomorrow, if not earlier!"
"Hmm, yes, well, there is a spell I can cast that will show us Mr. Potter's true love," Albus interrupted.
"Well, what are you waiting for? Cast it before Harry's subjected to the affection of any more pervs like Snape!"
Sirius was frothing at the mouth and Severus had to reign himself in not to make a rabies remark; instead he just sneered at the obnoxious man.
"I think we'd best leave that until the morning, then everybody will be awake and fresh and Harry's friends can be present as well. After all, they were the ones who hexed him in the first place."
Personally Severus suspected the Headmaster just liked having an audience, the bigger the better.
"Now come along. It's been an exciting day for all of us, so why don't we all go get some sleep. Don't worry, Sirius," he stopped the animagus from protesting, "I'll put a locking and warding charm on the hall so nobody will be able to disturb Harry. Let's go, you too Severus," and he led them from the Great Hall.
It's not fair, Severus wanted to whine; even the boy's mangy godfather and his werewolf had gotten in a snog. Surely he deserved at least one after having put up with the boy for nearly seven years? Not to mention saving Harry's life more times than he cared to remember. But a Snape does not whine, so Severus didn't. Instead he glared at the Headmaster, who didn't bat an eyelash, and thought of all kinds of nasty but not lethal potions he could slip in the damned man's tea. And a number of lethal ones that he could dose that idiot Black with.
The three men watched Dumbledore perform the lock- and warding charms and then Lupin pulled Black with him to his quarters.
"C'mon, Padfoot, we'll be able to wake Harry by tomorrow."
Black glared at Severus suspiciously until they'd turned a corner and were out of sight.
Severus prepared to sweep away dramatically, back to his dungeons where he planned to nurse yet another grudge.
"Oh professor Snape," Albus caught his arm and stopped him, his eyes twinkling. The Headmaster dropped his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "The password for the side door at the teachers' table is wine gum," and with that he took off for his own quarters.
Severus permitted himself a short small grin. Hmm, maybe he wouldn't be needing that hair loss potion after all.
~~ HP ~~ LM ~~
The next morning after breakfast all concerned parties gathered in the Great Hall around the sleeping figure of Harry Potter. The Headmaster had wanted to do the spell at breakfast while all the school was present, but Sirius and Lupin had vetoed that idea. So now the number of witnesses had been reduced to Harry's Gryffindor friends, who'd been so kind as to hex him, Draco Malfoy for some reason nobody knew but Snape sneered at anybody who dared to question his presence, and all the staff.
Dumbledore was wearing his most colourful robes, a red and yellow polk-a-dot, and the man's eyes were twinkling like mad. He stood in front of Harry and he raised his wand dramatically.
"Hey, wait a minute," Black interrupted and all turned to look at him, "if there's a spell that'll show us Harry's soul mate, why didn't you cast it the minute Harry was brought in?"
At least everybody in the room had the decency to cough, blush or avert their eyes.
"Is there anybody here who hasn't kissed my godson, for crying out loud?"
"He is a good looking young man," Minerva McGonagall said.
"Positively charming," said Filius Flitwick.
"Never seen such stamina on a broom," added Rolanda Hooch.
"Good way with snakes," this was Rubeus Hagrid.
"Yes, well, whatever the case," even the Headmaster didn't quite meet Sirius' eyes, "let me cast the spell so we can find Harry's soul mate since the person obviously isn't here at Hogwarts."
The Headmaster pushed back the sleeves of his robes, glanced around to make sure there would be no more interruptions, and then swished his wand as he solemnly spoke the words to the spell.
"Amor Exhibe! Exhibe Amor!"
A soft blue mist surrounded Harry for a moment and then the air above him started shimmer, and everybody edged forward to see who Harry's true love would turn out to be. The air crackled, the light flickered, and then a face appeared floating above Harry's heart.
Lucius Malfoy.
to be continued in Sleeping Potter