Title: Fragile Memories
Author: Lilyana lilyana_vamp@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Whedon, Greenwalt, ME, all them, not me
Summary: Answer to a challenge given to me by tipdip. Cordy has a crush on Angel, but he and Buffy can barely tolerate her presence. Angel loses his memory and then the fun begins.
Couple: B/A (not for long, I promise!), C/A
Rating: R
Category: Season 3 BtVS. Adventure. Romance. Not sure what else yet. Spoilers: None A/N: None that I can think of right now.
Part 3 Remembering
Cordelia drove toward home after the others demanded that Angel stay with them so they could 'figure things out'. She was disappointed that she didn't have her newfound man to ride with her. She always had known she could steal him away from Buffy if he'd just notice her, and she was accomplishing it, until the scoobies interfered. "And I woulda gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling kids."
She looked at the large house with its security gate enclosing it safely, it's lush, green grass, and it's lonely, dark windows. It had been too long since life had inhabited her childhood home. Her heart ached at the thought of leaving it again without going inside. "Why did Daddy have to screw things up for us? And why did they have to leave me without anything?" she asked herself, the tears rolling down her cheeks.
She drove around to the back of the house and hid her car in the shelter of the trees and locked her doors tightly. She crawled into the back seat and tried to make herself as comfortable as possible, squeezing her eyes shut, willing the tears not to come again. She knew it wasn't safe to sleep in her car, hiding in the dark in Sunnydale, but what choice did she have? She couldn't let anyone know that she had nowhere to live and that all her remaining belongings could fit into the trunk of her car. That would be social suicide.
***********************************
Angel managed to slip out of the library without anyone noticing him and he was relieved. If he had had to stay there one more minute with that slayer and her groupies, he would have snapped. All she could do was go on and on about how great she was at slaying vampires and demons. The last thing he wanted to hear was how great she was at killing his kind. Sure, he may not be a threat to her, but he didn't want to listen to her brag all night.
He looked around the parking lot for Cordelia, but she was long gone. He could have killed the Harris kid for the sarcastic things he was saying to her. If they didn't think Cordy belonged with them, then neither did he. He wanted to be wherever his Cordy was.
He followed her scent, walking at a brisk pace. He in no way wanted her to be alone at night in this place. He might not have remembered who everyone was, but he knew that Sunnydale was no place to go for a leisurely nighttime stroll. Her scent led him down an unfamiliar path and he found himself standing in front of a very large house surrounded with a fence. He easily scaled the walls and walked to where the scent was the strongest. He looked up at the window that he thought housed his Cordelia and vaulted up to the balcony. Upon peering inside, he knew his instincts were wrong.
The room was empty, bare, lonely. It smelled of Cordy, but there was nothing of her in there. The walls were plain white and the plush carpet was indented where her comfortable bed used to sit. The empty closet seemed to cry out for her. The whole house seemed haunted with the essence of the Chase family, but now just the ghosts of life remained.
As he leapt to the ground and peered through the kitchen window, he noticed a forgotten fork laying on the floor, and in the living room, a plant was wilting, begging for water and sunlight. He would imagine Cordy living in this house, laughing and smiling, but now there was nothing but darkness.
He looked around at the backyard, progressively becoming over grown with weeds and sensed something hiding in the trees. He walked toward the source of his suspicion and was surprised to see Cordy's car; he was even more surprised to see her sleeping in the backseat. Why was she sleeping in her car? Why wasn't she with her family, in her nice warm house?
He knocked on the door lightly, not wanting to frighten her, but he failed miserably. The scream that escaped her lips was audible, even for human ears. She sat upright and looked shakily out the car window.
As her eyes met Angel's, she didn't know whether to be scared or angry or relieved. She was petrified of sleeping outside in Sunnydale and knew that Angel would protect her, but she didn't know if she wanted Angel to know about her situation. What if he got his memory back? He'd go and tell Buffy and the others and then Xander would blab it all over Sunnydale High. She'd be ruined.
"Are you trying to scare me to death?" she asked, her fear disguised in venom.
"What are you doing Cordelia? What is going on?" Angel asked straightly, motioning to the dark house.
"Oh, that? It's nothing," she tried to shrug it off, but could see the vampire was having none of it.
"The truth Cordy, and now." His voice was firm and ungiving.
Cordy suddenly couldn't keep it in anymore. She wanted, no she needed to tell someone, and who better than Angel? He'd suffered being homeless; he'd know what to do. The words came pouring out of her mouth, followed by her betraying tears. She hadn't wanted to cry in front of him, but she couldn't help it.
Angel listened in stunned silence as the beautiful rich in girl in front of him told him that she had nothing, that it had all been taken away and her parents had taken off, leaving her to fend for herself in not only a cruel world, but an even crueler town. His heart ached at the sight of her tears and he sat in the backseat of the car beside her, holding her gently in his strong arms.
"Why don't you come back to my apartment? You can't sleep in your car. It's not safe."
"I can't Angel. Not after we almost."
"I'll make a deal with you: you come back to my apartment where I'll know you're safe, and I'll go to the mansion. I vaguely remember something about it. You need to be somewhere safe, and here isn't it." Angel wasn't about to back down and Cordy could sense it. She nodded slowly and wiped her tears from her cheeks.
"I don't want the others to know Angel," she pleaded.
"I won't tell them."
***********************************
Cordelia looked around at the sparse apartment and cringed. Angel had good taste, but he needed more in the way of decorations. It just seemed kind of bare. She turned as Angel brought in the box that contained what was left of her life as she knew it and felt like crying all over again. How could Queen C end up like this?
Angel sensed her shame and set the box down in the bedroom. He walked back out and took her into his arms. "You don't have to be ashamed Cordy. You didn't do anything wrong. I don't think of you any differently than I did before."
Cordy was relieved to hear him say those words to her. She didn't want him to think less of her know that she was broke. She leaned into his chest and let out one single sob. She then picked up her head high and smiled at him. "You know Angel, you're the greatest. You let me kick you out of your bed and take over your home just like that," she said and snapped her fingers. "I don't know how I can every thank you, as cliché as that sounds."
"Will you let me love you?"
"Huh?" Cordy looked at him in shock.
Angel sat down and pulled her down beside him. "Cordy, I know that you said I was in love with Buffy before whatever happened happened, but I have to be honest with you; I don't want to be without you. I don't want to get my memory back if it means that I can't be with you anymore. You make me feel human, more human than I've felt in centuries. I think I'm falling in love with you Cordelia Chase," he confessed and leaned in to kiss her.
Cordy welcomed his lips on her own. She lost herself in his kiss, willing herself to become part of him. She felt his hands roam her body, trying to map out every inch of it and she arched against him. As his lips traveled down her neck, her 'not-a-good-idea' sensor went off. "Angel," she gasped and pulled away.
Angel wanted to be angry with her, but he couldn't. He couldn't be angry at those sparkling hazel eyes, or that flowing mahogany hair, or those full, plump lips that looked like they had been kissed by cherries. Angel ripped his eyes away from her voluptuous body and stood up shakily. "I.I should go." After everything those kids had told him tonight, he knew that making love to Cordelia was the last thing he should do if he was trying to keep her safe.
Cordy nodded and followed him to the door. She smiled and pushed him out as he dove in to kiss her again. "None of that mister. I'm a proper young lady. You've escorted me home, now you need to go away," she winked at him and he growled, half angrily, half good-naturedly.
"Good evening M'lady," he bowed before her. She curtsied and closed the door. Angel looked at the solid wood and wondered if she would sleep any better than he would. He knew that sleep was going to be difficult, as wound up as he was now.
********************************
Cordy shut the door in Angel's face and leaned her back against it. She wondered if he'd sleep any better than she would tonight. She walked in and looked at the bed, not overly fond of the idea of sleeping in the same bed that her Angel and a certain blonde slayer had occupied, but her bones were weary. The thought of a real bed was too much for her to fight.
She collapsed on the bed and drifted off into a restless but wonderful sleep.
*********************************
iHis hands were cool against her skin and she arched her body, giving him full access to all she had to offer. She dragged her fingernails down his back, leaving red welts in their wake and her groaned in pleasure. His fingers and teeth teased her nipples, torturing them ever so sweetly and she pleaded incoherently. She needed him. She needed him inside of her now./i
"Cordy? Cordy, are you okay?" The voice ripped her out of her dream, and she was none too happy about it. She rolled over in the bed and pulled the pillow over her head, hoping that the intruding noise would go away and let her pick up her dream where she had left off. It didn't. She threw the pillow at the door and groaned when she heard it open.
"Cordy!"
"What?!" She rolled over in the bed to see Angel standing there, Buffy beside him. She knew something wasn't right. As her gaze traveled down, she noticed their hands entwined together. Something in her stomach churned and she bit back the tears at the realization: nothing was wrong, they were right. They were the way they were supposed to be again. Angel remembered that it was Buffy that he loved, not her the way he had said the night before. Cordy didn't think a heart could break into so many pieces.
"Buffy said you didn't go to school today. We were worried."
Cordy plastered on her trademark smile and shook her head. "Nothing wrong on the home front. Just catching up on some sleep! Thanks for letting me crash here after my car broke down," she lied too chipperly and jumped out of the bed. She grabbed her things and rushed out the door before anyone could say otherwise.
Buffy turned to Angel. "That was odd.even odder for Cordelia anyways."
Angel nodded. When Buffy hugged him, he returned her embrace, but something didn't feel right. It felt as though he would crush her body if he squeezed too tightly. She didn't have that deliciously perfect figure of the girl he had held the same way the night before, that of Cordelia Chase.
******************************
Cordy cringed as she saw Buffy and Angel walk into the Bronze together. It had been a few hours since she'd left them all staring after her and she was in no rush to see them again. She stood up and tried to make a quick exit, but Angel caught up with her.
"Cordelia, where are you going?"
"Oh geez, I don't know Angel. How about somewhere without all the drama that is you two?" she snapped and tried to pull herself out of his grip.
"You don't have anywhere else to go. I know. Here." He handed her a key and she looked at it with a puzzled expression. "It's the key to the apartment. Stay as long as you need to. I'll be at the mansion."
Cordy wanted to throw the key back in his face but she knew he was right. She took it from him and turned on her heels, her hair flying in his face.
He watched the girl walk away from him and part of him wanted to run after her and take her into his arms, but the other part knew that his girlfriend was waiting for him at a table, waiting to pick up their life where it had left off. He made his way back to the table and gave Buffy a smile.
"It's good to have things back to normal, isn't it?" she asked with a bright smile of her own.
He noticed the smile didn't seem nearly as bright as that of another's. "Yeah, good," he answered uncertainly.
Disclaimer: Whedon, Greenwalt, ME, all them, not me
Summary: Answer to a challenge given to me by tipdip. Cordy has a crush on Angel, but he and Buffy can barely tolerate her presence. Angel loses his memory and then the fun begins.
Couple: B/A (not for long, I promise!), C/A
Rating: R
Category: Season 3 BtVS. Adventure. Romance. Not sure what else yet. Spoilers: None A/N: None that I can think of right now.
Part 3 Remembering
Cordelia drove toward home after the others demanded that Angel stay with them so they could 'figure things out'. She was disappointed that she didn't have her newfound man to ride with her. She always had known she could steal him away from Buffy if he'd just notice her, and she was accomplishing it, until the scoobies interfered. "And I woulda gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling kids."
She looked at the large house with its security gate enclosing it safely, it's lush, green grass, and it's lonely, dark windows. It had been too long since life had inhabited her childhood home. Her heart ached at the thought of leaving it again without going inside. "Why did Daddy have to screw things up for us? And why did they have to leave me without anything?" she asked herself, the tears rolling down her cheeks.
She drove around to the back of the house and hid her car in the shelter of the trees and locked her doors tightly. She crawled into the back seat and tried to make herself as comfortable as possible, squeezing her eyes shut, willing the tears not to come again. She knew it wasn't safe to sleep in her car, hiding in the dark in Sunnydale, but what choice did she have? She couldn't let anyone know that she had nowhere to live and that all her remaining belongings could fit into the trunk of her car. That would be social suicide.
***********************************
Angel managed to slip out of the library without anyone noticing him and he was relieved. If he had had to stay there one more minute with that slayer and her groupies, he would have snapped. All she could do was go on and on about how great she was at slaying vampires and demons. The last thing he wanted to hear was how great she was at killing his kind. Sure, he may not be a threat to her, but he didn't want to listen to her brag all night.
He looked around the parking lot for Cordelia, but she was long gone. He could have killed the Harris kid for the sarcastic things he was saying to her. If they didn't think Cordy belonged with them, then neither did he. He wanted to be wherever his Cordy was.
He followed her scent, walking at a brisk pace. He in no way wanted her to be alone at night in this place. He might not have remembered who everyone was, but he knew that Sunnydale was no place to go for a leisurely nighttime stroll. Her scent led him down an unfamiliar path and he found himself standing in front of a very large house surrounded with a fence. He easily scaled the walls and walked to where the scent was the strongest. He looked up at the window that he thought housed his Cordelia and vaulted up to the balcony. Upon peering inside, he knew his instincts were wrong.
The room was empty, bare, lonely. It smelled of Cordy, but there was nothing of her in there. The walls were plain white and the plush carpet was indented where her comfortable bed used to sit. The empty closet seemed to cry out for her. The whole house seemed haunted with the essence of the Chase family, but now just the ghosts of life remained.
As he leapt to the ground and peered through the kitchen window, he noticed a forgotten fork laying on the floor, and in the living room, a plant was wilting, begging for water and sunlight. He would imagine Cordy living in this house, laughing and smiling, but now there was nothing but darkness.
He looked around at the backyard, progressively becoming over grown with weeds and sensed something hiding in the trees. He walked toward the source of his suspicion and was surprised to see Cordy's car; he was even more surprised to see her sleeping in the backseat. Why was she sleeping in her car? Why wasn't she with her family, in her nice warm house?
He knocked on the door lightly, not wanting to frighten her, but he failed miserably. The scream that escaped her lips was audible, even for human ears. She sat upright and looked shakily out the car window.
As her eyes met Angel's, she didn't know whether to be scared or angry or relieved. She was petrified of sleeping outside in Sunnydale and knew that Angel would protect her, but she didn't know if she wanted Angel to know about her situation. What if he got his memory back? He'd go and tell Buffy and the others and then Xander would blab it all over Sunnydale High. She'd be ruined.
"Are you trying to scare me to death?" she asked, her fear disguised in venom.
"What are you doing Cordelia? What is going on?" Angel asked straightly, motioning to the dark house.
"Oh, that? It's nothing," she tried to shrug it off, but could see the vampire was having none of it.
"The truth Cordy, and now." His voice was firm and ungiving.
Cordy suddenly couldn't keep it in anymore. She wanted, no she needed to tell someone, and who better than Angel? He'd suffered being homeless; he'd know what to do. The words came pouring out of her mouth, followed by her betraying tears. She hadn't wanted to cry in front of him, but she couldn't help it.
Angel listened in stunned silence as the beautiful rich in girl in front of him told him that she had nothing, that it had all been taken away and her parents had taken off, leaving her to fend for herself in not only a cruel world, but an even crueler town. His heart ached at the sight of her tears and he sat in the backseat of the car beside her, holding her gently in his strong arms.
"Why don't you come back to my apartment? You can't sleep in your car. It's not safe."
"I can't Angel. Not after we almost."
"I'll make a deal with you: you come back to my apartment where I'll know you're safe, and I'll go to the mansion. I vaguely remember something about it. You need to be somewhere safe, and here isn't it." Angel wasn't about to back down and Cordy could sense it. She nodded slowly and wiped her tears from her cheeks.
"I don't want the others to know Angel," she pleaded.
"I won't tell them."
***********************************
Cordelia looked around at the sparse apartment and cringed. Angel had good taste, but he needed more in the way of decorations. It just seemed kind of bare. She turned as Angel brought in the box that contained what was left of her life as she knew it and felt like crying all over again. How could Queen C end up like this?
Angel sensed her shame and set the box down in the bedroom. He walked back out and took her into his arms. "You don't have to be ashamed Cordy. You didn't do anything wrong. I don't think of you any differently than I did before."
Cordy was relieved to hear him say those words to her. She didn't want him to think less of her know that she was broke. She leaned into his chest and let out one single sob. She then picked up her head high and smiled at him. "You know Angel, you're the greatest. You let me kick you out of your bed and take over your home just like that," she said and snapped her fingers. "I don't know how I can every thank you, as cliché as that sounds."
"Will you let me love you?"
"Huh?" Cordy looked at him in shock.
Angel sat down and pulled her down beside him. "Cordy, I know that you said I was in love with Buffy before whatever happened happened, but I have to be honest with you; I don't want to be without you. I don't want to get my memory back if it means that I can't be with you anymore. You make me feel human, more human than I've felt in centuries. I think I'm falling in love with you Cordelia Chase," he confessed and leaned in to kiss her.
Cordy welcomed his lips on her own. She lost herself in his kiss, willing herself to become part of him. She felt his hands roam her body, trying to map out every inch of it and she arched against him. As his lips traveled down her neck, her 'not-a-good-idea' sensor went off. "Angel," she gasped and pulled away.
Angel wanted to be angry with her, but he couldn't. He couldn't be angry at those sparkling hazel eyes, or that flowing mahogany hair, or those full, plump lips that looked like they had been kissed by cherries. Angel ripped his eyes away from her voluptuous body and stood up shakily. "I.I should go." After everything those kids had told him tonight, he knew that making love to Cordelia was the last thing he should do if he was trying to keep her safe.
Cordy nodded and followed him to the door. She smiled and pushed him out as he dove in to kiss her again. "None of that mister. I'm a proper young lady. You've escorted me home, now you need to go away," she winked at him and he growled, half angrily, half good-naturedly.
"Good evening M'lady," he bowed before her. She curtsied and closed the door. Angel looked at the solid wood and wondered if she would sleep any better than he would. He knew that sleep was going to be difficult, as wound up as he was now.
********************************
Cordy shut the door in Angel's face and leaned her back against it. She wondered if he'd sleep any better than she would tonight. She walked in and looked at the bed, not overly fond of the idea of sleeping in the same bed that her Angel and a certain blonde slayer had occupied, but her bones were weary. The thought of a real bed was too much for her to fight.
She collapsed on the bed and drifted off into a restless but wonderful sleep.
*********************************
iHis hands were cool against her skin and she arched her body, giving him full access to all she had to offer. She dragged her fingernails down his back, leaving red welts in their wake and her groaned in pleasure. His fingers and teeth teased her nipples, torturing them ever so sweetly and she pleaded incoherently. She needed him. She needed him inside of her now./i
"Cordy? Cordy, are you okay?" The voice ripped her out of her dream, and she was none too happy about it. She rolled over in the bed and pulled the pillow over her head, hoping that the intruding noise would go away and let her pick up her dream where she had left off. It didn't. She threw the pillow at the door and groaned when she heard it open.
"Cordy!"
"What?!" She rolled over in the bed to see Angel standing there, Buffy beside him. She knew something wasn't right. As her gaze traveled down, she noticed their hands entwined together. Something in her stomach churned and she bit back the tears at the realization: nothing was wrong, they were right. They were the way they were supposed to be again. Angel remembered that it was Buffy that he loved, not her the way he had said the night before. Cordy didn't think a heart could break into so many pieces.
"Buffy said you didn't go to school today. We were worried."
Cordy plastered on her trademark smile and shook her head. "Nothing wrong on the home front. Just catching up on some sleep! Thanks for letting me crash here after my car broke down," she lied too chipperly and jumped out of the bed. She grabbed her things and rushed out the door before anyone could say otherwise.
Buffy turned to Angel. "That was odd.even odder for Cordelia anyways."
Angel nodded. When Buffy hugged him, he returned her embrace, but something didn't feel right. It felt as though he would crush her body if he squeezed too tightly. She didn't have that deliciously perfect figure of the girl he had held the same way the night before, that of Cordelia Chase.
******************************
Cordy cringed as she saw Buffy and Angel walk into the Bronze together. It had been a few hours since she'd left them all staring after her and she was in no rush to see them again. She stood up and tried to make a quick exit, but Angel caught up with her.
"Cordelia, where are you going?"
"Oh geez, I don't know Angel. How about somewhere without all the drama that is you two?" she snapped and tried to pull herself out of his grip.
"You don't have anywhere else to go. I know. Here." He handed her a key and she looked at it with a puzzled expression. "It's the key to the apartment. Stay as long as you need to. I'll be at the mansion."
Cordy wanted to throw the key back in his face but she knew he was right. She took it from him and turned on her heels, her hair flying in his face.
He watched the girl walk away from him and part of him wanted to run after her and take her into his arms, but the other part knew that his girlfriend was waiting for him at a table, waiting to pick up their life where it had left off. He made his way back to the table and gave Buffy a smile.
"It's good to have things back to normal, isn't it?" she asked with a bright smile of her own.
He noticed the smile didn't seem nearly as bright as that of another's. "Yeah, good," he answered uncertainly.