As Dib stepped from his house into the blaring sunlight, he raised a hand to shield his eyes. Having provoked his frightening sister inadvertently by eating the last chocolate bar, he thought it best to evacuate – quickly. He was not surprised, as he stepped onto the sidewalk, pondering what to do now, to hear a shriek of horror from within his house. No doubt, Gaz had discovered the chocolate bar. Rather, the lack thereof.

                What to do, what to do … expose the crowd demons down on Reedy Creek Road? Get snapshots of the red, demonic apparition currently residing in that woman with the fifty cats' house? Finish tracking down the chupacabra Gaz saw in the store parking garage? Or, of course, he could do what he'd been doing every day now for little over a year, and try to expose the friendly neighborhood alien after world domination.
                The choice was obvious. Since only one of those posed a threat to humanity, only one of those had given him something to strive for and something to loathe, and only one of those had any role in this fic, he knew exactly what to do. He didn't even need to think before he found himself en route to Zim's; he'd lived in this city all his life, and he knew the way to Zim's not quite secret base like Gaz knew the buttons on her Gameslave.

                Quickly Dib became lost in his own thoughts, most of which were impossible schemes he never thought would work but wished would to reveal to his ignorant planet what Zim really was. So many nights he'd spent thinking rather sadistically about what might happen when he finally did win. Because he would win. He had to. Humanity depended on it.
                He was jerked back to the strange reality he lived in by quite an odd sight indeed. Zim had… a lemonade stand? Dib quirked a brow. Zim remained seemingly unaware of his presence, for he was busy twiddling his claw-like thumbs and whistling. Dib wasn't really sure why, but he figured it was part of Zim's 'clever' attempt at being a perfectly normal human worm baby.

                "What are you up to no, Zim?" Dib questioned, shattering Zim's perpetual whistling by taking one last step into view. Zim blinked, and then narrowed his contact-covered eyes into a glare.          

"Nothing that concerns you, insolent Dib-worm," was the alien's curt reply.
Dib raised an eyebrow, and glanced around at the lemonade stand, which apparently wasn't selling lemonade. On the table were several thin, metal tubes. Curious and suspicious, Dib swooped one up and read the label. 

 "Get Thin Now..?" He read incredulously.  Zim's glare feircened and he stood up to snatch the vial from Dib's hands. 

"Yes, Dib," he said, putting great emphasis on his nemesis' name, "you see, your pathetic species has some obsession with loosing weight. Not surprising, really, as they're all hideously large anyway."
Dib still seemed unimpressed.       

"So you started a diet program?"

"Yes. Yes I did."
Dib laughed out loud, then looked around the deserted street. Zim didn't appear to be having too much business.  

"Who buys something medicinal from a lemonade stand?"
Zim laughed, apparently amused.

"Just wait, DIB, just wait."

And wait he did. For nearly forty minutes, the two rivals sat there, glaring. Well, they glared for the first twenty. The last twenty Dib spent propped up against a fence, yawning, energy zapped by the sun. Summer heat and a black trench coat don't mix great. The only reasons he stayed at all were a) he usually jumped on an opportunity to prove his enemy stupid and b) his sister's tantrums took a while to wear off. With a  final yawn and the decision that Gaz must've worn herself out by now, and was probably venting her anger on poor, unsuspecting Mutant Cows of Death and Carnage, Dib stretched and left, but not before calling over his shoulder:

"Told you, Zim."
The Irken in disguise glared at Dib's retreating form. 

"IGNORANT FOOL! THEY WILL COME YET!"
Zim then waited until Dib was out of site, before grabbing the liquids and trudging angrily back into his house.  

"Hiya Master!"

Gir bounced off the couch and waved a cone-shaped arm frantically. Zim raised an eyebrow. 

"It didn't work, Gir. It would appear these stupid worm-humans need another insentive…"
Gir was, not surprisingly, paying absolutely no attention. 

"EVERYONE LOVES A SLINKY!" Gir exclaimed, running in circles with a slinky he found Tallest-know's-where.  Zim sighed slightly, ignoring him. 

"What is it? What is something that would appeal to every miserable creature on this planet? Think, Gir, think!"
It was at that moment Zim was hit with inspiration. More precisely, he was hit in the eye (rather painfully) by Gir's slinky.