Disclaimer- Mine? Yeah right.

AN- I live I live I live!!! *starts singing To Life* To life to life to life… OK now this is just getting repetitive. Anyways I'm sorry for this and I don't feel like explaining why because I just did for my other ficcies I'm typing up. (Spring break is fic updating time.) Read them if you must know. And this chapter is dedicated to my good friend the ottersaw na no da! (He wrote the note below the chapter title… way back when he still came to school.) As such he gets a cameo or lack thereof!

Chapter 5 (already?)- Don't misunderestimate my SHOOTING STAR PLUMB BOB!

            (It flies through the air in a beautiful arc before breaking your skull! Its psychedelic rainbows of amazing hues herald the apocalypse.)

As the curtain rose on our marginally (just marginally!) twisted little play, a scary sight greeted our eyes, waving sadistically. The floor was covered with comatose fangirl bodies, and a small to-scale model of the Eiffel Tower had been created from empty Coke bottles. shadow priestess cowered in a corner, wide brown eyes darting from one corner (where Kaylana was cheerfully tying up and unconscious Tasuki) to another (where Kchan was staring forward with glazed eyes). She whimpered a bit and pulled her pretty cream jacket tighter around her.

Suddenly…

"IT'S HIM!" the deranged girl shrieked, jumping up and pointing frantically at empty air.  "Oh my god it's the OTTERSAW!! He has come back from the dead!"

Kchan snapped out of her trance immediately. "Wh-where?!" She strained her eyes in the general direction of shadow priestess' madly quivering finger. "I dun see him," she complained loudly.

"HE'S THERE BY SUZAKU I SWEAR HE IS!"

TA moaned, the noise having woken her up. "What is this…?"  Her eyes opened a fraction as she took in the scene before her.

"YOU LITTLE OTTERSAW IF YOU DON'T GET OVER HERE AND LET ME KILL YOU I'LL… I'LL KILL YOU!" the priestess screamed, bashing a poor innocent area of carpet. (Me n' my friends, we have such great relationships…)

"Yareyare…" Draconsis sighed, downing her 30,984,278,193rd bottle of sake.

"Whee sake pokie fun!" MK sang, stabbing an empty with a spork. With a grin, she brandished a permanent marker and drew Suboshi's face over another, then bashed it in. "Subo die!"

Draconsis flared up. "DON'T TOUCH THE SAKE!" She yanked out a paper tessan and proceeded to chase the poor little child around the basement.

Melon Kitten paused, confused. "But empty bottle have no sake." She shrugged. "Oh well… GO EVIL DIVE BOMBING ERASERS GO!!!" At her call, fifty-seven erasers appeared and began chasing Draconsis, covering the poor child in dust.

While all this was going on, who should come but Tigress of the Moon with her faithful katana, tromping down the stairs and smashing bottles as she went. She was grinning rather disturbingly, allowing the fangirls a good view of some fangs.

"YOU TOUCHED THE SAKE!" Draconsis shrieked, mortified, turning around and chasing the Tigress instead.

Behind her, Suboshi smirked as he attacked the remaining bottles with his ryuuseisui. "Go forth shooting star plumb bob!!!" (Gotta love them translators…)

Tigress paused, thinking. "Waitasecond… if SUboshi's here, then AMIboshi must be around somewhere too…" She collapsed in a fit of joy.

"Anou…" The flutist blinked, then ran and hid in the bathroom.

The girl's eyes narrowed. "IF he does come, I should glomp him." She leapt to another spot on the sofa. "No you shouldn't. He's evil." She leapt back. "No he's not! He's Amiboshi!" Leap. "Amiboshi is tricksy and false." Leap. Sob. "No don't say that! Amiboshi is our friend!" Leap. Leer. "He tricked you. He hates you. He'll kill you."

"Oro~" Kaylana offered, looking up from where she was busy messing with Tasuki's mind.

"HEY HEY HEY!" Shizuka bounced in. "I KNOW WHERE THAT CAME FROM! THAT'S FROM THE TWO TOWERS!" She grinned. "Although I should know since I've only seen it 57 times…"

"She knowsss our secret, yes she does preciousss…" Tigress' evil alter ego muttered suspiciously.

"So!" Shizuka began perkily. "Where's Legolas?" She ran over to shadowchan and poked her. "Hello?"

"YOU LITTLE OTTERSAW!" she yelled, still bashing the floor and entirely unaware of the girl hovering above her.

"GET UP YOU SLACKER!" Shizuka shook the child violently. "WHERE'S MY LEGOLAS?!"

"Legolas? This is an FY party." shadowchan blinked, eyes turning into little dots.

"Grrrrrrrrr…"

"Suboshi hunting!" MK exclaimed suddenly. "I'll get that little psycho yo-yo boy!" She folded a paper airplane and launched it at the poor seishi, following it with seven more dive-bombing erasers and a flying spork.

"Da…" Chichiri sat forgotten in a corner.

Well, not quite forgotten.

"CHICHIRICHAN!" TA raced over to comfort her bishie. Surprisingly enough, shadowchan was far too distracted with ripping holes in the floor to notice her bishie's distress call. Leaving Chichiri all alone…

"It's just you and me," TA sang happily. "Come on, we don't have any mean little priestesses to bug us now…" She carted him off to a quiet corner, kicking Kaylana out.

"Mean little priestesssssss…" Tigress accused. "She wants our preciousssss…"

Kaylana brushed herself off angrily, then picked up her pre-packaged Tasuki and stalked off to another corner, where strangely enough, Draconsis and Kchan were waiting.

"You think you're gonna get away with the bishie don't you!!"

"Eep…"

"WELL YOU'RE DEAD WRONG!"

Sounds of extreme pain, and bandits breaking out of their bonds to hide in the bathrooms. Sounds of shock when they run straight into flutes.

"Who're you?!"

"Hey you're that flute playing TRAITOR!"

Tigress looked up from her spot. "We found our precioussss…"

Amiboshi winced. Busted.

Hm. I'll just stop there. I guess this is my first experience with writer's block, I'm not proud of my work. Ah well maybe the next chapter will be better. Still, review na no da! I'm really sorry for the slow pace but I haven't been inspired lately. Sorry sorry…

REVIEW ME REVIEW ME OR ELSE I AM LOST.