Title: Nothing Left of Me...
Author: the weeping willow
Chapter: 4- "Playing With My Memory"
Rating: PG-13 for implied nudity, sex, female homosexuality (not really noteworthy since this is Willow and Tara, but I'm putting it anyways), violence, etc.
Spoilers: Up until the end of season 6 (and possibly a bit from the beginning of season 7 later...)
Setting: Summer between seasons 6 and 7.
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy or any related items. Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy do.
Description: Willow writes letters to her (deceased) girlfriend Tara, to try and overcome her grief; at Gile's suggestion.
Distribution: Not without asking. I'd prefer you link back to this please, or get my permission first.
Contact: queenofthebandgeeks@hotmail.com
Author's Notes: Nothing much to say... Hate school, though. Expect updates every week or so.

Nothing Left of Me...

letter four:
June 24, 2002


Tara,

I woke up screaming last night. Giles ran into my room, with a couple of the witches in the coven. I guess they thought I was being attacked or something. I wasn't, really. Not physically, I mean. It was my dream.

You and I were playing with Miss Kitty Fantastico and talking about using herbs for healing. And right in the middle of your sentence, you just stopped talking. And Miss Kitty leaped off the bed, all cat-like, and she ran out the door.

Then you smiled at me and said, "He's coming." I was confused. I tried to ask you what was going on, why Miss Kitty ran away, who was coming, but you held your finger up to your lips to shush me.

And you looked out the window and whispered softly, "Goodbye." And before I could say anything a dark patch of blood spread over your heart, across your pure white dress. You were covered in it. It flowed down your body and puddled on the floor.

Then you leaned in to kiss me. But it wasn't you anymore. It was Warren. And before I could wipe the taste of him off my lips, he took out a gun, and shot me in the heart. Everything seemed to stop, all of a sudden, and then time sped up, faster and faster. Amy ran frantically on her wheel, faster than a rat could ever move, squeaking maniacally. And this roaring noise filled my ears, like the wind, and then it was you screaming. Screaming, screaming, screaming! Goddess, it was horrible!

I couldn't get back to sleep. Giles stayed with me, watching over me the whole night. I guess it's nice he cares, right? But I hurt all night long.

Even as Giles sat there with me, holding my hand, I wished that he wasn't there. That you, Tara baby, were holding me close and whispering comforts in my ear as the night grew old. It should've been you.

If you were here, I would be fine. Cured. No more big bad magick. Just you and me and the Goddess and the God. None of this would've ever happened.

And Giles wouldn't ever give me that look. The look that says he's concerned, and sad, and scared of me, and worried, and it kills me to see that. I don't want them to worry. I just want you back.

Willow