Disclaimer: Lucius Malfoy, Narcisa, the house elfs, and the Magic Ministry with all it´s members, belong to the great J. Rowling. I´m just using them for my own pleasure… and yours.

Thanks to my English Teacher for her help with my grammar.

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Ivory Tower: I have had a look to your stories list and I can see you are really a humor master! I´m honored that you liked mine.

Artemis: Well, this is a short fic, so this is the last part of it. I hope you like it.

(For both of you, I´m not that good in English, so if you find any error in my comments, it´s because my Teacher didn't see them)

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"Lucius Malfoy and the Perfect Day"

Part Two

This is becoming a too long and too awful morning – Lucius thought while he was changing all his clothes, after he had lost 30 minutes deciding what to use. (And men say, women are vain and indecisive).

In that moment, a house elf appeared, brush and ribbon in hand, because he had to do his master´s hair.

Why are you so late, useless servant? – Lucius screamed to the frightened elf.

So… so… sorry, my Master – the tiny elf said.

While the elf was doing his job, Lucius was reading the news on "The Prophet", and a particular headline, "Murder in Hogsmeade", caught his attention. He couldn´t stop smiling, remembering the fun that he and his companions had, torturing and murdering that mudblood family.

The elf brushed his master´s hair very carefully, knowing that if he pulled out a single hair, he would be severely punished. Finally the elf made a low pony tail with the elegant, deep green ribbon, that matched his master´s cloak.

You´re ready, my Master. – the elf said, handing a mirror to Lucius with a shaky hand.

Lucius fixed an imaginary hair that was loose from the pony tail and returned the mirror to the elf, who hurried out of the room. Then, he called his wife, hoping she was ready.

Narcisa, as all good wives do, had already checked if everything was in order. Lucius, satisfied, went to his office to write an urgent letter. Then, when he was signing it, the ink spilled over the parchment, ruining it.

Damn! – Lucius exclaimed, furious and frustrated for not having anyone to blame. Well, he could blame the servant who bought that ink and pen, but he remembered buying it himself.

Angrily, he started the letter again and signed it carefully. The next step was to seal it with a special green wax, but when he was melting it, he spilled it over his finger.

Aaaarrrg!

Drawing his wand out he conjured a simple painkiller spell, but now on his finger there was a little blister. Then, when he turned down to see the parchment, he discovered that he had toppled the ink and now it had spilled over all the letter, ruining it again.

Lucius cursed again, reaching the limit of his patience. Quickly he stood up from the chair, to prevent getting the ink on himself. Then, furiously, he called some house elf who cleaned everything in a second. For the third time he wrote the letter, and finally he managed to deliver it with a black owl. When the animal had gone, he checked the clock. – 9:15 a.m. It´s almost time. – He thought.

He returned to his bedroom and found his wife entering the bathroom for… (well, you know what a person does in the bathroom…) But, before she could do anything, she steppedn on something yellow and wet, and she slipped and fell to the floor.

Aaaahhh!

Lucius heard a piercing scream, and asked himself what could have happened to his wife, but he didn´t bother to see what had happened until he heard her calling him. To his surprise, he found the woman lying on the floor, moaning in pain.

Lucius Malfoy! – she exclaimed furious. – Your stupid duck was on the floor and I slipped on it! Now, my dress is ruined and some part of my body too!

You should see where you put your feet, Narcisa. – Lucius said, while he helped his wife stand up. Then he thought she would not be ready in only ten minutes. – I think it´s better if you stay here. I will apologize for you to the ministers. – He told her, annoyed by the inopportunity of the accident.

10 minutes latter, when Lucius was walking down the stairway the first of the ministers arrived.

The rest of the ministers arrived and soon, all of them were sitting at the table, drinking coffee and sharing the latest gossip of the ministry (yes, men are gossips too, no matter if they don´t recognize that), while they were waiting for the breakfast.

Where´s your wife, Malfoy? – a minister asked.

Oh, she sends her apologizes, but she can not join us, because some useless elf left water on the floor en she fell hurting herself. She was a lucky she didn´t break her back.

Oh, I´m sorry. Please, tell her I hope she recovers soon. – The minister said.

The breakfast continued, while the men talked about politics, "deatheaters", politics, quiddicht, gossip, and politics. (Oh, did I say they talked about politics?)

An hour later, everyone was satisfied and they went to the hall to talk more about ministry business.  Lucius was specially interested in knowing who had been elected to be the new Ministry of Magic, because after Cornelus Fudge had deserted some days ago, he nominated himself for the job. Even though he was eager to know the result of the votes, he had managed to appear indifferent.

… By the way, Malfoy. – a man said with an enigmatic smile. – Do you want to know who was elected to be our new Minister of Magic?

Of course I do. – Lucius answered. – You know I´m worried about the ministry´s future, and I want to do everything that is in my power to help… - he said with a neutral voice.

(Don´t let him fool you…)

Yes, we know that. – Another man said. – However, maybe our news won´t please you…

Lucius only rised a eyebrow, thinking that nothing could worsen his day… But he didn´t have time to think of the possibilities, because the other man was talking again.

Well, the new Minister of Magic is… Arthur Wesley.

Plop!

In that very moment Lucius Malfoy fainted and fell to the floor.

The end.