LAST LOOKS & A JUNE WEDDING
Donovan smiled down at Pax. She was wrapped up in the covers and had put her pillow over her head. She moaned and groaned as her ignorant ass lover pushed and prodded her out of bed. This was her damn vacation for Pete's sake and she deserved to sleep late. Damn prick. Days like these made her wonder why she loved his ass at all. When his prodding and poking failed, he climbed onto the bed, halfway settling his body over hers. Jesus, he weighed a ton! He took hold of the pillow and drew it away from her head. She covered her face with her arms and moaned again. Hell no. He would have to pick her up and throw her in the shower. Of course, he wasn't adverse to that idea. He'd done it a thousand times before, hadn't he? It was one idea she seemed to like a lot, too. Hmmm. Maybe she should roll over and let him pick her up.
"Why do you care if I'm awake," she groaned. "You don't need me to be around you all damn day, do you?"
"Yes, Jonella," he said as he kissed her head. "I have a few rare days off and I'd like to spend them out of this damn apartment. Come on; get out of bed. I promised Stasia I'd take her to the park, and we both want you to come along."
It had been a couple of months since Pax moved in with Donovan and she was still on shaky terms with his daughter. Their tentative relationship had grown a little better and it didn't seem to freak Pax out to hold her or even give her a hug without first being asked. The kid was nothing like her mother, praise Jesus, and Pax was okay with that. It was difficult, but getting easier by the day. She had even begun to call Pax something different than 'Spoon Lady.' She couldn't quite say Jonella yet, but she managed something that made a nodding acquaintance to 'Donnie.' Gawd, yet one more fucking nickname to add to the list. Of course, Donovan's ex still didn't quite know how to react to the relationship or the engagement. The first time she saw the ring on Pax's finger, she nearly died. Pax watched as her eyes bugged out in shock. Uh huh. See. Even foul mouth dragons can get a man, princess. Bite me. She tried to keep her childish thoughts at bay, but sometimes, it was difficult. She'd always have a complex when it came to Remy Ellis.
"Okay, okay, you asshole. Leave me alone and I'll get up, I promise," she said quietly.
Pax slumped on the metal bench. Jesus she was tired. She was getting too damn old to chase around a little child. Stasia Donovan's legs might be short, but she could flat out run. She left her to Donovan. If she didn't stop and take a breath, she'd fall over dead from a coronary. Jesus. Just two months out of the CIA, and her body had already gone to pot. She looked up when Donovan approached with Stasia running at the helm. Remembering what happened to her before, Stasia slowed down and approached the bench at a slightly less charging pace.
"Whew. I need a gallon of water," Pax said.
Donovan smiled. "You okay?"
"Maybe in a few days, I'll be okay." She ran her hand through Stasia's golden locks. "Blondie, you can really run."
She nodded happily, agreeing that she could, indeed run. "Donnie no run?"
Pax shook her head. "Nope. Donnie no run, not today, tomorrow, or the next day." She looked up at Donovan. "I can see where she gets her stamina," she said with a grin.
He returned her smile. "Yes. Definitely a Donovan trait," he said with a lifted eyebrow. He glanced down at his watch. "Well, kiddo," he said as he lifted Stasia into his arms. "Your mother is picking you up in about an hour. I think we should go."
"Donnie carry Staddie," she asked.
"If her arms can hold out," Pax said. "Come on, Blondie."
When they arrived back at the apartment, Donovan carried Stasia into her room to gather her things while Pax waited quietly in the living room. She found herself chewing on her nails. Ugh. She stopped what she was doing. It was such a bad habit and she knew she must break it. She heard a knock on the door and she sighed a little. Remy was behind it, she didn't need to open it to see. She stood, approached the door, and swung it open. Remy eyed Pax solemnly, waiting for her to get out of the way. Pax moved back, allowing Remy to enter and Pax closed the door behind her. Wow. What a switch. This used to be her place and now it's mine. Well…sort of. They had talked about moving, getting a place that could really and truly be theirs and no one else's. When Pax turned around, Remy stood staring at her.
"Frank should have the kid ready in a few minutes," Pax said.
Remy nodded. "Good. Thanks." She stared at Pax for a few moments before saying, "There's something I want to say to you."
Pax rolled her eyes. Here it goes. Remy had yet to say anything about the living arrangements or the engagement ring. She was well aware of both, but she hadn't touched it, and probably didn't want to. She sighed a little and said, "Okay, let it out."
"I've made it no secret that I still love him," she began. "He knows and you know. I'm going to be watching and waiting in the shadows. If you mess up once, I won't hesitate to be right back in. We have a bond, a connection with our child, and that will never go away. Watch what you do, because I'll have my eyes and ears open. I just wanted you to understand that."
"You don't have to worry one ounce that I'm going to mess up, because I'm not. I love him, too, and at this moment, on this day, he is mine. I am a possessive bitch, so I'd suggest that as soon as you have your daughter, you get your ass out of my face once and for all. You blew it, and that's something I don't intend to do." Pax wanted to say more, but she hesitated. She could hear Donovan bringing Stasia into the room.
With his daughter in his arms [she had squealed with delight at the sight of her mother], he glanced at Remy and then at Pax. He noticed the look passing between them and he'd seen it many times when they were together. Basically, they were having some type of turf war, but the victor wouldn't change. As he handed Stasia over to Remy, he stood back with his arms crossed. For five minutes or more, he lamented about his lack of taking so damn long to make up his mind. Much of this could have been avoided if he had only spoken up sooner. Of course, he didn't know things were going to change so abruptly between he and Pax. He said nothing. He approached his daughter and gave her one more gentle kiss on her forehead.
"Donnie kiss Staddie bye bye," Stasia asked as soon as Donovan pulled away.
Pax sighed a little. Stasia had never asked her for a kiss. "Sure, Blondie, I can do that." She approached the little girl and buffed her cheek a little. Damn if she wasn't melting her heart a little. "See you next time, okay?"
Stasia smiled. "Okay, Donnie. Bye bye."
As soon as Remy and Stasia were gone, Donovan approached Pax and wrapped his arms around her from behind. "The ice is melting, Jonella. I feel it inside you. I've never wanted to push her on you, not after the hell you've experienced."
She laid her hands over his. "It's okay, Frank," she said. "You're not pushing. It's weird, but it feels nice having a kid around once in a while."
"And what about you and my ex?"
Pax turned within his embrace and faced him. "That might take some work. She still loves you, you know, and I think she believes I'm beneath you or some shit. I'm fine with her, though. If she stays in one corner, I'll stay in mine."
He kissed her forehead and then stepped back as if he were assessing the room. "You know, I think we should move."
"I want to," she said, "I really do. I don't feel comfortable in this place. She seems to be all over it, you know? Does that sound stupid?"
He shook his head. "No, it doesn't. I understand. We can start looking tomorrow."
* * *
Months later, June arrived and the weather was nice and warm. There wasn't a cloud in the sky. Of course, why would a cloud dare ruin such a wonderful day? Donovan looked all around him, incredulous at the amount of people in attendance. Most of them were dressed in light summer outfits. The big event wasn't necessarily formal. Neither of them had actually wanted the affair to be black tie. He glanced at his little girl. She was so cute in her little pink sundress with matching barrettes. She was amazed at the crowd herself and looked around at them with big, wondrous eyes. She had probably never seen so many people in one place in her life. Stasia kept making eye contact with her father to ensure that he hadn't disappeared. She also began to look around for her "Donnie." She couldn't see her anywhere and scanned the crowd before fixing her eyes on her father again. Donovan was pleased with the progression in the relationship between Pax and Stasia. Pax had finally grown a bit more at ease with Stasia and had begun to share her heart with her. Stasia simply found another person willing to love her, and she latched on for all she was worth.
At the thought of Pax, he recalled that they had finally found a place that was completely theirs. It was roomy and rattling with large windows and loft style bedrooms. When Donovan saw the place, he couldn't help but comment that he'd seen enough lofts to last a lifetime. Pax had elbowed him in the stomach and flat out demanded they shell out a security deposit. Of course, Donovan loved the place as much as she. But would he admit that right away? Hell no. In love he was. Whipped he was not. However, after that first night [spent making love, surprise surprise], he had to tell her he loved it. The only disadvantage he found was the fact that there wasn't exactly a door for Stasia's bedroom. It would be tricky, but they thought they could behave themselves until an alternative was found.
Donovan looked up as Pax approached. He had never seen her so beautiful. Her dress was a pale shade of blue and it flowed down to a full skirt. She had managed to tame her wild hair and get it into a relatively neat style. Although he liked it better down, she was lovely with it upswept as well. That was okay. Later, he could take it down. As if on cue, soft music began to play and Pax took his hand. Donovan looked at Stasia for the briefest of moments. She was clapping her little hands while she watched two people she loved very much making their progression down the red carpet toward their new lives together.
FINIS! Is it is or is it ain't who we think it be?
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A/N: Many thanks to those who have read and reviewed here and at the FLMB. Dawn369, Dawn2323, Julianna, Cara, Dreamy, Deana, Lady T, Nicky, Cindy, Serena, and Serena1221, I owe you all some extra thanks!!!! You have kindly and consistently read my work and offered feedback. You guys are great. If I forgot anyone, I'm sorry, but as the body ages, so does the mind! Hahahahaha! Special thanks to Dreamy for her helpful suggestions whenever I got stuck!