Ah… part 4! I would have had this one up ages ago… but considering that I have aol and I couldn't exactly sign into fanfiction.net, I was definitely sort of screwed! Anyway- I know this part is really short (but the song is actually 4 minutes long!), but there really wasn't much I could do with Bakura-chan…
And for all those Tea fans, sorry… I guess? She's sort of… sluttish in this section. I couldn't help it!
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*…*: song lyrics '…': thoughts
Left of the Middle: Leave Me Alone
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*I ask you to hold me…
But you don't wanna hold me; it don't work like that.
I want you to love me, but you don't wanna love me-
I'm losing patience now.*
His feet seemed to be the
only thing his eyes could stare at at the moment.
They seemed to be the only things that kept Bakura feeling like they'd never
change. Their steps were long and steady, normal pace, only a certain amount of
noise. It was all constant; the yami needed that more than ever. Everything
else around him was changing, even the cards he'd laid out before himself had
shown something to him that he didn't even want to dwell on. But Bakura knew it
was inevitable. They'd foretold what was just about to happen between Ryou and
himself. And it hurt him deeply that he'd been cast aside.
'Cast aside.' He repeated
the words in his mind once again. His dark eyes contorted in confusion. 'Cast
aside? When the hell have I been cast aside before?' Bakura shoved his hands
into his jacket's pockets, still starring at the ground underneath him. He bumped
into someone; the man replied with a harsh comment; Bakura wasn't paying
attention. All he could think about was the look on Ryou's face as he repeated
his words.
"Get OUT." They rung in his ears.
'I thought I'd be happy when
he finally stood up to me. But now…' It was almost hard to breathe. His pace
stopped as he looked up, it was getting cold and the sun was starting to set.
He'd been walking for hours; yet it didn't matter. He longed to be back in
Ryou's house- and look at the young man from afar. But it was an addiction,
right? Not looking at him… but the beatings. No matter how hard he would try,
they would continue to fall on his hikari.
But why did he feel sorry
for himself? So what if he got finally pushed out of that place he was living
in? He could live outside of that place. It was boring there anyway… But Bakura
knew they were all lies to cover up his hurt and frustration. He felt sorry
that he'd hit his hikari once again… he felt hurt by being told to leave as if
he were a nuisance… that's what he was, though… a nuisance.
Bakura shut his eyes
tightly: he'd shown Ryou tears. That was the worst thing he could have ever
done. 'What could have possessed me to CRY in front of my hikari?!' He wanted
to shout at himself aloud. The only time he had ever shed tears in front of
him, it had been when the young man had been sleeping; Bakura had been admiring
the fresh bruises on Ryou's porcelain skin. 'I'M SO WEAK!' It seemed that the
yami was full of self hatred.
*Oh… leave me alone (oh
leave me alone)-
Stop asking for more, I'm going home on my own….
Oh… leave me alone (oh leave me alone)-
I'm walking out of the door…
I'll make it on my own…*
'What about him..?' The
thought had been drifting in and out of his mind, but now it seemed to linger.
'He hates me now… if he didn't before, now he will.' Bakura looked out at the
people around him- they were walking within their own world, why should they
care about something happening in his? 'All of those damn friends of his will
hate me even more for this.'
He frowned,
he knew what everyone's reactions would be. But Bakura didn't want to deal with
any of it. He finally had been stood up to by his hikari. That was all there
was to it. Now it seemed that he would have to quiet himself- go back into his
withdrawn self; the self that had stood up to time in the Millennium Ring.
'Keep telling yourself that,
Bakura.' Even his mind was disagreeing with his decision. The yami didn't want
to deal with any of the pressures that came with going back and even trying to
apologize. Apologizing? That was completely out of the question- no matter how
necessary it seemed; the act would only show how weak he truly was. All he
could think about was disappearing- maybe that was better.
'But disappear?' That
thought in its self seemed too extreme. Could he actually leave Ryou- his
HIKARI? Bakura shook his head; it hurt so much. 'That's what he wanted, though…
me to leave.' The pain in his chest was also taking it's
toll. 'I can do this… I can… for his sake.' His dark eyes were starring up at
the sky. He hated going there- but he knew that it was the only way to live
away from his hikari- but still able to look out for the one he loved. He would
always be close, right?
*You like me to stroke you…
Careful I don't choke you- did you read my mind?
You say don't be blue…
Is that the best you can do?
I've lost my patience now…*
She lifted a brow as she
opened the door, acknowledging his presence. "What the hell are you doing here,
Bakura?"
"I need a place to stay for
the night." He tried not to show any shame in his voice.
"What- you don't have the
money to pay for a hotel or something?" Tea crossed her arms over her pink silk
pajama set.
"I left my money at Ryou's
house." Bakura frowned; he hated being interrogated- even if he knew he had to
be polite in order to spend the night. The woman smirked, stepping aside to let
the man in. He looked around. The place was warm and smelled of lavender. He actually
hated it. Tea pushed him aside as she walked ahead of him and into the living room,
turning off the television.
"Well- I was actually starting
to wonder when you'd be back." She plopped down noiselessly onto the couch, reaching
for her nail file. It seemed that in her private life, Tea was much more arrogant
and vain. Maybe it ran in the family… but who was ever to know? Her parents were
never really involved. "You keep running
off. I don't know if I want a fuck who keeps leaving before
I'm done."
"Are you even able to get any
other fuck besides me?" Bakura talked nonchalantly, looking around. Her eyes narrowed.
"Watch it, Bakura- you don't
wanna end up on the street tonight, do you?" His dark eyes shifted to her face,
she was smirking with a look of complete malice.
'What the hell is with this woman?
She's constantly in heat, huh?' Bakura sighed, he looked down.
"Ah… don't look that way, Bakura-chan…"
She stood and pressed up against him, caressing the side of his face. "You just
got a chance to get away from that brat…" The yami tensed, then tried to relax,
she was leading him to the couch. Hearing his hikari disrespected by her was a nagging.
But he had to put up with it, no matter how much he actually wanted to kill her.
"You know I'll take care of you…" He was laying on the couch now; she was unbuttoning
her pajama blouse.
"…" Bakura said nothing as she
slipped off her blouse, exposing her round breasts. 'This is pathetic…' She leaned
down and kissed his neck.
"Bakura… I was almost forgetting
what you taste like… we haven't seen each other as much as we used to." Tea was
slipping off her pajama shorts, tossing them to the ground along with her forgotten
blouse; she was completely naked now. The man closed his eyes. Again the feeling
of hatred for her arose. That's all she wanted him for, huh? Her lips were trailing
down his neck as her fingers started to unbutton his shirt. It wasn't hatred for
her… it was hatred for himself. He was the one who always
came back to her.
*Oh… leave me alone (oh leave me alone)-
Stop asking for more- I'm going home on my own…
Oh… leave me alone (oh leave me alone)-
I'm walking out of the door-
I'll make it on my own…*
Her head rest against his shoulder
as his chocolate colored eyes stared at the ceiling. The two had been laying together for hours- she was a hard sleeper. Sitting up,
the woman rolled into the couch's warmth, her naked body was covered by a baby blue
flannel blanket that barely went up to her shoulders.
Bakura stood in the dark room,
sighing. Moonlight was sliding into the living room from a partially open window.
He walked to it, the light shining onto his naked flesh. Silver hair fell down his
shoulders as he looked out down at his chest- the ring would be laying over the
exact same spot on his hikari's chest. But- could he be sure? The man sighed- he
knew because he would be able to feel the desertion of his other half. Even now
he could feel Ryou's soul room shut.
Tea moaned; Bakura turned and
looked at her sleeping face. In her sleep she might have actually been mistaken
for someone kind and without hidden intentions. But Ryou was different… only in
his sleep was it more obvious who he really was. A peaceful young man who only wants
the best for everyone. But the reality was that the yami was out there alone now.
His hikari had pushed him away. And now all he was left with was that superficial
woman who only wanted sex.
*Oh… leave me alone (oh leave me alone)-
Stop asking for more- I'm going home on my own…
Oh… leave me alone (oh leave me alone)-
I'm walking out of the door-
I'll make it on my own…*
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So far I've gotten some… positive reviews- thanks a lot for the encouragement!